Nose job for UGLY nose

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Ed123 said:
My nose is very wide and bulbous in the middle and the tip is also bulbous. I wish I would have a normal nose like other people. Then I could at least consider myself Average looking, and also wouldn't have to worry like this about getting a pretty wife.
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There is an 'easy' way to get beautiful woman. Be a rich man. But bro, I really do not suggest you to get a woman through your wealth because it would make you get wrong woman, a woman who physically beautiful, but with behavior that would make you suffer.

Since I was young I have noticed the women around me and I found few women like I describe above. This is what then make me always see a woman on her heart, not on her beauty. Yeah, if I must choose between a woman who is beautiful but has bad character, or a woman who is not beautiful but has good character, without hesitate I would choose the second.

Of course, not every beautiful woman has bad character. There are many beautiful women who have good character and personality.

So, can you expect to get beautiful wife?. It's okay, bro, it's okay. This expectation is normal. However, I suggest you to not think "I should get beautiful wife". But you must think "I should get a wife. If she is beautiful, Alhamdulillah. If she is not beautiful, still Alhamdulillah because I have a wife".

We don't know what will happen in the future. Probably Allah will give you a beautiful wife. But if you can think like I teach above, then no matter your wife in the future is beautiful or not beautiful, In Sha Allah you will be happy with her.

:)
 
MuslimInshallah said:
(pensively) I wonder if you feel that having a particularly beautiful wife can counterbalance your own feelings of unattractiveness. (sigh) But this won't work, either, you know.
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Walaikumas Salam sister.

I will be honest with you......

Actually the main reason for longing a "pretty" wife is to fulfill my sexual desires (I am telling the truth). If I don't feel physical attraction towards the girl, then I don't want to marry her. Even if I marry her I will NOT have physical attraction towards her, so sexual satisfaction won't come. That's why I want to marry a girl whom I find attractive, and I can fulfill my desires with her. (Sexual desires are the most strongest desires in humankind.)
(I am NOT saying that I will get married ONLY for sexual matter, but this is the main issue for me)

Will a "pretty" girl marry an a boy whom she does NOT find attractive (i.e. the guy is physically repulsive to her)??? Pretty girls think about sexual satisfaction before marrying a boy, right?
 
Really? Because she probably won't sleep with you if she is upset.

...and maybe you wouldn't sleep with her either.
 
Ed123 said:
Will a "pretty" girl marry an a boy whom she does NOT find attractive (i.e. the guy is physically repulsive to her)??? Pretty girls think about sexual satisfaction before marrying a boy, right?
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But brother, you can´t know how some pretty girl is thinking about you - like if she finds you attractive or not. All this is just only an idea in your own mind. It´s possible that some girl doesn´t even think about your nose (like you afraid).

I repeat: this matter is in your mind, not others.

We can clearly see how you have now decided that you are not attractive but terrible, horrible ugly - propably the ugliest man in this planet. This is your the biggest problem - not your nose.
 
Ed123 said:
Will a "pretty" girl marry an a boy whom she does NOT find attractive (i.e. the guy is physically repulsive to her)??? Pretty girls think about sexual satisfaction before marrying a boy, right?
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:sl:

Brother, you’ve been getting some good advice. I would recommend reflecting on it and focusing on Allah :swt1: for a solution that is beneficial for you.

I’m not made of stone and fully understand where you’re coming from. In my opinion, for what it’s worth, Allah :swt1: made your nose that way so this “insurmountable problem” could pop up.

When you have a problem and can’t find a way out realize that Allah :swt1: made it that way so you can turn exclusively and sincerely to Him – with your heart, mind, and soul.

Allah :swt1: made the fire cool for Ibrahim :as: , restored Ayyub’s :as: health and prosperity, and got Yunus :as: out of the belly of the whale – among many other things. Compare your situation to what I just mentioned.

And yes, a pretty girl will marry a guy with some form of supposed imperfection. It all depends on the person (girl). Not every pretty girl is going to like you. As a matter of fact, there are pretty girls that may not want to marry you even if you were “attractive”.

With that said, there are pretty girls that may find your nose attractive for whatever reason – or not care at all. I’ve seen many pretty girls with guys that some may consider “not attractive”. Hence the sayings, “What is she doing with him? and “How did he get her?” and “What does she see in him?”.

Please note that these guys aren’t rich and famous. They’re regular everyday guys.

So your problem isn’t as big as you think. Please reflect on all the helpful advice you’ve receive in this thread.
 
Ed123 said:
Actually the main reason for longing a "pretty" wife is to fulfill my sexual desires (I am telling the truth). If I don't feel physical attraction towards the girl, then I don't want to marry her. Even if I marry her I will NOT have physical attraction towards her, so sexual satisfaction won't come. That's why I want to marry a girl whom I find attractive, and I can fulfill my desires with her. (Sexual desires are the most strongest desires in humankind.)
(I am NOT saying that I will get married ONLY for sexual matter, but this is the main issue for me)
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If a man feel comfortable with his partner, then he will always want together with her, and will always have sexual desire on her although his partner is not beautiful. But if a man feel uncomfortable with his partner attitude on him, then naturally he will make a distance with her and will not feel sexual desire on her although she is beautiful. This is why there are men who have beautiful wives but make affair with other women who are not beautiful.

You will know it after you start looking for a wife. You might meet pretty woman, but if her attitude toward you make you feel uncomfortable, I am not sure if you will like her. You might also meet a woman who is not beautiful. But if her attitude on you make you feel comfortable and feel appreciated, I guess, you will start have a feeling which you want to be together with her.

Will a "pretty" girl marry an a boy whom she does NOT find attractive (i.e. the guy is physically repulsive to her)??? Pretty girls think about sexual satisfaction before marrying a boy, right?
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A woman will choose a man that she feel is attractive. However, attractive in this matter usually does not refer to handsomeness, but refer to character, attitude, and behavior. A woman indeed, think about sexual satisfaction before marrying a man, but she will not choose a handsome man if this man has attitude that make her feel uncomfortable.

-------

Young bro, there are many things about life and people that you haven't know. And you cannot learn it from wrong sources like movies or pop medias.
 
ardianto said:
A woman will choose a man that she feel is attractive. However, attractive in this matter usually does not refer to handsomeness, but refer to character, attitude, and behavior. A woman indeed, think about sexual satisfaction before marrying a man, but she will not choose a handsome man if this man has attitude that make her feel uncomfortable.
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So you are saying a "pretty" woman will find a man "attractive" even if that man is UGLY ?! How can is this possible??
 
Ed123 said:
So you are saying a "pretty" woman will find a man "attractive" even if that man is UGLY ?! How can is this possible??
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Women don´t think only what you look like (like men too - I think). It depends a lot if your behaving and your character attract them. Also, when it´s matter of marriage, every woman also thinks are you trusty partner as well how much you trust to yourself and how you see yourself, not only how you see other people. it would be better to stop thinking such superficial matters like what people are looking like. Remember this when you are looking for life partner, not a beauty queen. You need to think do you really want to spend all your life with that person - so you need to look more about hers personality than hers beauty. And same goes also when woman is looking for a life partner.

And again; you can´t know how others see you. I have a relative, a young man. Of my mind he isn´t very good looking but some other women have told that of their mind he is very attractive. How this is possible? It´s because all people haven´t similar taste but they like different things and see people by different ways.
 
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sister herb said:
Women don´t think only what you look like (like men too - I think). It depends a lot if your behaving and your character attract them. Also, when it´s matter of marriage, every woman also thinks are you trusty partner as well how much you trust to yourself and how you see yourself, not only how you see other people. it would be better to stop thinking such superficial matters like what people are looking like. Remember this we tou looking for life partner, not a beauty queen. You need to think do you really want to spend all your life with that person - so you need to look more about hers personality than hers beauty. And same goes also when woman is looking for a life partner.

And again; you can´t know how others see you. I have a relative, a young man. Of my mind he isn´t very good looking but some other women have told that of their mind he is very attractive. How this is possible? It´s because all people haven´t similar taste but they like different things and see people by different ways.
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To be more specific, my nose is Wide, miscontoured and highly undefined at the tip. It is also oval/bulbous and lacking sufficient definition.
 
Assalamu Alaikum bro,
It is ok to feel insecure sometimes, it is natural, but every time I do I remember what Allah tells me.
"He has created the heavens and the earth in just proportions, and has given you shape and made your shapes beautiful: and to Him is the final Goal." (64, 3)
 
suheylah said:
Assalamu Alaikum bro,
It is ok to feel insecure sometimes, it is natural, but every time I do I remember what Allah tells me.
"He has created the heavens and the earth in just proportions, and has given you shape and made your shapes beautiful: and to Him is the final Goal." (64, 3)
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Whenever I feel good looking boys and girls, my confidence and worth get smashed by their good looks. The reality is people treat "good looking people" the best. Ugly people are treated just for the sake of humanity...
 
Ed123 said:
Whenever I feel good looking boys and girls, my confidence and worth get smashed by their good looks. The reality is people treat "good looking people" the best. Ugly people are treated just for the sake of humanity...
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*Whenever I see good looking..... (sorry for typo)
 
My piece of advise is don't let society tell you what is beautiful and what is not when in fact Allah clearly tells you he made your figure/ shape beautiful. So, you going to listen to God, or the TV. Be confident and realize everyone looks different and we are all beautiful in our God given unique way.
 
suheylah said:
My piece of advise is don't let society tell you what is beautiful and what is not when in fact Allah clearly tells you he made your figure/ shape beautiful. So, you going to listen to God, or the TV. Be confident and realize everyone looks different and we are all beautiful in our God given unique way.
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Society gives the vibe that "if you are ugly looking, you are going to suffer much more than others"...
 
Have you ever talked with some specialist about your nose problem? Meeting a doctor or therapist might help you to see if you have need for surgery or if the therapy might help you to see your real problems. We here can´t do much - only give our advices. You then listen them or not. But anyways, repeating how ugly your nose is or how ugly you think it is, doesn´t take the matter forward. Go to seek help to yourself.
 
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sister herb said:
Have you ever talked with some specialist about your nose problem? Meeting a doctor or therapist might help you to see if you have need for surgery or if the therapy might help you to see your real problems. We here can´t do much - only give our advices. You then listen them or not. But anyways, repeating how ugly your nose is or how ugly you think it is, doesn´t take the matter forward. Go to seek help to yourself.
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Sister, I heard scholars saying that Allah made all the creations "beautiful" and "perfect". If this is the case, then why some people are born with physical deformities and somtimes without certain body parts?
 
Why Allah made some people poor for their lifetime and some so rich they have more money they could ever spend? Why some are sick and some live all their life in good health? Why some are blind or deaf? Why some people are sad and depressed while others are happy?

I am not a scholar but I have read that Allah will test all of us.

Maybe your nose is your test. If it´s true, you should thank Allah and stop worry about it.


And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient.
(2:155)

Or do you think that you will enter Paradise while such (trial) has not yet come to you as came to those who passed on before you? They were touched by poverty and hardship and were shaken until (even their) messenger and those who believed with him said, "When is the help of Allah?" Unquestionably, the help of Allah is near.
(2:214)

You will surely be tested in your possessions and in yourselves. And you will surely hear from those who were given the Scripture before you and from those who associate others with Allah much abuse. But if you are patient and fear Allah - indeed, that is of the matters (worthy) of determination.
(3:186)

Your wealth and your children are but a trial, and Allah has with Him a great reward.
(64:15)
 
Ed123 said:
Will a "pretty" girl marry an a boy whom she does NOT find attractive (i.e. the guy is physically repulsive to her)??? Pretty girls think about sexual satisfaction before marrying a boy, right?
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Assalaamu alaikum Ed,


(smile) Mmm... it depends on the woman in question. (smile) We are not all mindless clones, you know.

But it may surprise you that sexual satisfaction comes lower on the list of reasons a woman might marry you than you might think. Indeed, it may not even be on the list at all. Women may seek marriage to be loved and cared for. Or because they want a baby. Or because they want financial security. Or because they want a respectable and secure position in society. (smile) And there are also women who might marry you because they want to rescue you. Or because they want to find some self-worth. Or they want to look after you. Or because they admire some skill or talent you have, and want to be a part of that. Or because they feel they need to marry to fulfil their deen. Or...

(smile) And of course, they likely want to have someone to express their love to. Someone to share with. Someone to build something with... (smile) And yes, someone to play with (though women tend to think more about this after marriage).

(smile) Each woman has her own reasons for marriage. And she may well have various different reasons mixed together. (amused) But sexual satisfaction as a primary goal, in and of itself? Mmm... this is much less likely to be important for a woman.

(smile) And you know, when you start to care about someone... it doesn't really matter what they look like. Those imperfections (that we all have) often are the things that mark us as unique to our loved ones, and that end up holding special meaning for them. A woman who loves you would love your nose, precisely because it was so... you.

And finally... (twinkle) having a pretty nose says nothing about a man's potential to sexually satisfy his wife.


May Allah, the Unique, Help us to make pairs that help us to get closer to Him.
 

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