I can't stop cuddling my pillow like you all advised....

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Mustafa16

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Many of you have advised me not to cuddle with my pillow pretending it's a girl because it leads to zina or mental zina.....but I find it very difficult to stop.....I try resting on my back or on my right side, preoccupying my mind with other things like school and research, exercising, but I keep finding myself back in my bed cuddling and kissing my pillow out of lonliness, pretending it is the girl I told you all about (Esma)......I just can't get her out of my mind, it's gotten to the point where I am often in bed....and personally, I think it is the lesser of two evils because I would end up committing more direct sins if I don't talk to an imaginary version of her.....what do you think? is this the lesser of two evils and thus should be done? or is it a pathway to zina?
 
No no, you're only asking for advice. You don't have to apologise.

Maybe it is advisable for you to sleep on the ground rather than on a bed with pillows. In fact, it is Sunnah to sleep on the floor.
 
*throws up hands and smiles*

This one is on you guys, I told him to either get married or focus on school.:facepalm:
 
lol..

I will never make a lesser of two evils argument again..

aaaaalthough..

:|

this is a religious forum, I don't ever want to talk about pillow cases and bed bugs.. dammit.
 
I don't think advising him to focus on school will work. His only choice may be to get married. He can continue studying while married.
 
Little_Lion said:
*throws up hands and smiles*

This one is on you guys, I told him to either get married or focus on school.:facepalm:
Click to expand...
how do you expect me to get married when I am still in High School??? although I suppose I could do that second ACT simulation on this one exam practice website, or practice in my books for the ACT.....I did one, and it was a higher score than the last practice test.....I can't read, as I don't have the focus....ill look into ADHD medications, but I doubt it will end well.....
 
My mother married while she was still in high school, she was 17 and had the permission of her parents.
 
Why can't you marry while in high school? There's nothing to prevent it. The West has this idea that people should only get married when they're in their late 20s or so, and have Zinaa before then. That's not the Islaamic way.
 
Little_Lion said:
My mother married while she was still in high school, she was 17 and had the permission of her parents.
Click to expand...
That may work for a sister, as they are generally not expected to be the breadwinner, but I need to get an education in order to get a job....I have another several months until I can get a job (since I have to get my driver's license when I am 18 since I didn't get a permit), and 4-5 years until I get a career....money is still a factor.....since I am a brother and I am EXPECTED to be a breadwinner
 
If you can find a girl who is willing to remain with her parents while married to you until you manage to get a job, your problem will be solved.
 
I was a motocross racer in my teen age. In that time what came into my mind when I was in bed were the race track that I must memorize, strategy for race, the optimum setting for my motorbike, etc. So I didn't cuddle my pillow and imagine it as a girl.

I do not suggest you to become motorcycle racer. But I suggest you to have a hobby.
 
Huzaifah ibn Adam said:
If you can find a girl who is willing to remain with her parents while married to you until you manage to get a job, your problem will be solved.
Click to expand...
I suppose I could do that with one of the masjids here, as they are quite conservative...or I could also get married while in college while working full time, (60 hours a week) that way money won't be an issue...plenty of relatively well paying jobs you can get with just a High School diploma or GED....or if it gets too bad, I could just give up on college....but that would break my parents' hearts.. :(
 

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