My Face depresses me:(

[AnonymousPoster]

i need to let this out i feel really low and i been feeling depressed for some time keeping it will make it worse so i am going to let it out.

A few years ago i was involved in an accident and that left me with a scar across my face is not that bad i wear make up and i try to hide it but is still visable.

my cousin, my sisters who are all so beautiful(unlike me) all got married one after the other, my family been trying to find me a brother but well who said looks doesnt count?:rollseyes

i get no attention at all, no proposals simply nothing, and i believe is because this dumb scar

people say to me `OH dont worry reach Jannah and you will be beautiful then`. I am sorry but this hurts. No woman likes to be called ugly.

i got no self esteem and i am paranoid. I wish nobody went for looks but strictly for personality and deen because i posses both.

So thanks for reading this and i just wanted to let it out.

 

[glo]

i need to let this out i feel really low and i been feeling depressed for some time keeping it will make it worse so i am going to let it out.

A few years ago i was involved in an accident and that left me with a scar across my face is not that bad i wear make up and i try to hide it but is still visable.

my cousin, my sisters who are all so beautiful(unlike me) all got married one after the other, my family been trying to find me a brother but well who said looks doesnt count?:rollseyes

i get no attention at all, no proposals simply nothing, and i believe is because this dumb scar

people say to me `OH dont worry reach Jannah and you will be beautiful then`. I am sorry but this hurts. No woman likes to be called ugly.

i got no self esteem and i am paranoid. I wish nobody went for looks but strictly for personality and deen because i posses both.

So thanks for reading this and i just wanted to let it out.

Oh, sister, I am sorry to hear of your injury!

Sometimes people say things with the best intention, without realising how patronising or hurtful it may be for the recipient.

Islam teaches that you will have your reward in the afterlife, and you should hold on to that hope!
But it doesn't much ease the pain and hurt you are feeling now in this earthly life.

I don't know how obvious your scar is - but do you really think of yourself as ugly? Take a good long look at yourself. I am sure you are more beautiful that you think at times ...

I pray that you will learn to love yourself as you are!
Never mind what other people think of you ... God loves you, just as you are - and so should you!

May God bless you abundantly, sister.

 

[Hijaabi22]

Aaaaaaw! Honey, I dunno wat 2 say... Im sure your beauuurifulllll, (this is a sis talkin ryt?), and i have one phrase 4 u, beauty lies in the eye of the beholder, InshaAllah I AM SUUUUUUURRRREEEE there is sum1 out there 4 u WIDOUTTTT SA DOUBT! And like U said, U have both the deen and the personality MASHAAAAAAALLLLAAAAHHHH! Luk at it this way, theres loadsa people out there hu have the luks and thats about it, no deen no personality, now i know 4 a FACT that most people out there luk beyond looks, so girl CHIN UP, BE HAPPY wid wat U R and who you are and just be gr8ful 4 everythin you have, and inshaAllah one day I hope all ya dreanms come true and you find inshaAllah a pious spouse who will give you all you deserve, Ameeeeeeeennn!! SMILE PWEEZ! 4 ME ??? xx

 

[Umar001]

i need to let this out i feel really low and i been feeling depressed for some time keeping it will make it worse so i am going to let it out.

A few years ago i was involved in an accident and that left me with a scar across my face is not that bad i wear make up and i try to hide it but is still visable.

my cousin, my sisters who are all so beautiful(unlike me) all got married one after the other, my family been trying to find me a brother but well who said looks doesnt count?:rollseyes

i get no attention at all, no proposals simply nothing, and i believe is because this dumb scar

people say to me `OH dont worry reach Jannah and you will be beautiful then`. I am sorry but this hurts. No woman likes to be called ugly.

i got no self esteem and i am paranoid. I wish nobody went for looks but strictly for personality and deen because i posses both.

So thanks for reading this and i just wanted to let it out.

Assalamu aleykum, ffended:

Am so sorry, I feel like crying, you know sister, there are some brothers who, now you have to trust me, am not saying this as a lie to make you feel better, but there are brothers who will find you beautiful, beauty is not something that everyone will agree on, one person might find someone beautiful while the other does not. What is the assessment of beauty.

You do have the majority of people who take that to be beautiful u have to be this and that and hieght is this and lips like that and so on, but that beauty fades, that beauty can go as quick as it came, rather look at those who judge beauty with wisdom sister.

What is it that makes a lady who has stretch marks from giving birth beautiful in the eyes of the wise husband?

What is it that makes people with severe burns beautiful in the eyes of the ones they love?

You see, I personally hold the view, that beauty is a reflection in my eyes of what is withing, Wallahi, there is nothing more beautiful then a Muslimah on her deen, following the way of the Prophet and companions, peace be upon him, nothing more beautiful, that is why sometimes brothers find themselves thinking, SubhanAllah taht sister is beautiful, and then you think, wait, she is wearing niqab how can i say she's beautiful, it is only because of the way she carries herself, the way she walks in humilty, the way she impliments the sunnah and so forth..

There is nothing more beautiful than a servant of Allah who is upon the truth and is submitted to Him truly.

I know you might think, 'yea right, it wont help when I show him my scar' sister, if a person is shallow enough to leave you because of a scar then khalas leave that person no problem, he knows his limiations, but be sure, the one that embraces you even if you have a scar even if you are obese even if you have disabilities, that brother, inshaAllah will love you because of you as a person, because of your beauty that reflects from deep inside the beauty that will only grow instead of fade with time as you become wise.

You dont want nor need a foolish man,

I hope you believe me, at least that you believe that I think I am speaking the truth, cos I really do see it like this.

 

[Muhammad]

Islam teaches that you will have your reward in the afterlife, and you should hold on to that hope!
But it doesn't much ease the pain and hurt you are feeling now in this earthly life.

Islam teaches us that our actions and intentions are what matter; not our appearances. Let us look at the following verses of the Glorious Qur'an:

O Children of Adam! We have bestowed raiment upon you to cover yourselves (screen your private parts, etc.) and as an adornment, and the raiment of righteousness, that is better. Such are among the Ayât (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.) of Allâh, that they may remember (i.e. leave falsehood and follow truth ). 7: 26

... Verily, the most honourable of you with Allâh is that (believer) who has At-Taqwa [i.e. one of the Muttaqûn (pious - see V.2:2). Verily, Allâh is All-Knowing, All-Aware. 49:13

And the same concept is delivered by this hadeeth:

"Allah does not look at your appearance or your possessions; but He looks at your heart and your deeds." (Muslim)

Therefore so long as you have this inner beauty, this Taqwa of Allaah, it does not matter what the people think of you on the outside. I believe that this certainly does help to ease the pain and that the hope of the hereafter is a bonus in addition to all this. People are tested in this life: some are poor, some are blind, some deaf and others experience deaths; so we need to be thankful for what Allaah has given us and for saving us from being in a worser situation.

 

[TheRightPathI]

Assalamu aleykum,
You see, I personally hold the view, that beauty is a reflection in my eyes of what is withing, Wallahi, there is nothing more beautiful then a Muslimah on her deen, following the way of the Prophet and companions, peace be upon him, nothing more beautiful, that is why sometimes brothers find themselves thinking, SubhanAllah taht sister is beautiful, and then you think, wait, she is wearing niqab how can i say she's beautiful, it is only because of the way she carries herself, the way she walks in humilty, the way she impliments the sunnah and so forth..

There is nothing more beautiful than a servant of Allah who is upon the truth and is submitted to Him truly.

I thought I was the only one who thought like this.

 

[Ismahaan]

Assalamu Alaikum,

Didn't you make the below statement sis?

I should be marryin soon but i keep delayin it this is simply because i am not physically perfect yet, i need to loose about 3 stones and tone up.
My fiance and is family are now thinkin i am having second though which is not true at all. I am embaressed to tell the real reason though..dont know what to do

Your posts are somewhat inconsistent????????

 

[Ismahaan]

i need to let this out i feel really low and i been feeling depressed for some time keeping it will make it worse so i am going to let it out.

A few years ago i was involved in an accident and that left me with a scar across my face is not that bad i wear make up and i try to hide it but is still visable.

my cousin, my sisters who are all so beautiful(unlike me) all got married one after the other, my family been trying to find me a brother but well who said looks doesnt count?:rollseyes

i get no attention at all, no proposals simply nothing, and i believe is because this dumb scar

people say to me `OH dont worry reach Jannah and you will be beautiful then`. I am sorry but this hurts. No woman likes to be called ugly.

i got no self esteem and i am paranoid. I wish nobody went for looks but strictly for personality and deen because i posses both.

So thanks for reading this and i just wanted to let it out.

Also, are you Anonymous Tester AND Anonymous Gender as well? :? :? :?

 

[chacha_jalebi]

sister if someone looks @ your looks and decides whether to make you a life partner, then that person is a retarded abused ******** and it you would be better off without someone like that!

sister Allah (swt) will never do injustice to us, theres always good behind his doings, but we fail to see it sumtimes, also ask your mummy, and your family if you are good lookin or not they will tell you everyone is good looking

1 little scar shouldnt let you feel down, so sista smile always because im sure Allah (swt) has chosen someone special for you and you just gota be patient and inshallah, you will have a heavy partner soon ameen

 

[Ismahaan]

lol, It's because the Anon account is used by several different people...

Oh okay :uhwhat :hiding:

 

[BlissfullyJaded]

Anonymous Gender shows up as Anonymous Tester on the forum page. Different people obviously use it, therefore, the quote you showed there is that of another member who also wishes to remain anonymous. Oops I was late...jazakallah khair bro Alpha.

To the topic starter: You're better off without men who only look for outer beauty and not at inner beauty. It is better that they behave this way before marriage, rather than you be married, get a scar, and end up divorced because you're no longer beautiful enough. Its hard to look at the bright side of things, but everything happens for a reason. In the bleakest of moments, remember Allah is with you, and He is protecting you from something that can be so much worse. Be grateful for your situation, no matter how hard it is.

May Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala) grant you ease, and grant you a husband who fears Allah and is compatible with you. Ameen.

 

[*noor]

i need to let this out i feel really low and i been feeling depressed for some time keeping it will make it worse so i am going to let it out.

A few years ago i was involved in an accident and that left me with a scar across my face is not that bad i wear make up and i try to hide it but is still visable.

my cousin, my sisters who are all so beautiful(unlike me) all got married one after the other, my family been trying to find me a brother but well who said looks doesnt count?:rollseyes

i get no attention at all, no proposals simply nothing, and i believe is because this dumb scar

people say to me `OH dont worry reach Jannah and you will be beautiful then`. I am sorry but this hurts. No woman likes to be called ugly.

i got no self esteem and i am paranoid. I wish nobody went for looks but strictly for personality and deen because i posses both.

So thanks for reading this and i just wanted to let it out.

Sister anonymous please listen to what I want to say. Some of us have flawless looks and some of us don't. So what?? It seems to me that the people with the not so attractive looks are luckier in a way. That way you know that the man who married you did not marry you for your looks. If you were very attractive and had a flawless face, someone may have married you mainly for that. You said that your sisters and your cousins are "beautiful" and got married one after the other. So how do you know their husbands didn't choose to marry them because of their external beauty??

At least you have the internal beauty which can be fully seen. So you don't have a perfect face. At least that will allow everyone to see your true beauty. That way you can be certain about the reason that someone chooses to marry you.

If you want to talk, feel free to pm me sister.

 

[united]

Sometimes we look at a particular fault and forget all the good things.
Look at all the things Allah has blessed you with and then look at people around you who are not as fortunate as you.
" Look towards those who rank below you, so that you may get used of being thankful, and do not look at those who rank above you lest you should despise the favours of Allah swt upon you ".
And everything doesnt seem so bad after all.

 

[DigitalStorm82]

Sis... I only see it as one way...

Allah has saved you from someone who would have taken advantage of your looks and mistreated you as a wife. Inshallah, the right person will come along soon and he will see pass the scar and acknowledge that you're still beautiful and with great character as well as deen.

Just be patient... don't lose your trust in Allah... He knows what is best for us... keep steady in your duahs and Inshallah everything will be ok

W'salaamz

 

[duskiness]

Beauty is a strange thing. And i'm so sure it doesn't come with perfect face or body!
sometimes I couldn't find beauty in a person until she/he smiled. Sometimes it's a look that person gave me.
But today i'm sure that beauty is not perfect. it's something different.
Maybe ask your best friend to point out what she likes in your apparency?

 

[Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн]

Assalamu aleykum, ffended:

Am so sorry, I feel like crying, you know sister, there are some brothers who, now you have to trust me, am not saying this as a lie to make you feel better, but there are brothers who will find you beautiful, beauty is not something that everyone will agree on, one person might find someone beautiful while the other does not. What is the assessment of beauty.

You do have the majority of people who take that to be beautiful u have to be this and that and hieght is this and lips like that and so on, but that beauty fades, that beauty can go as quick as it came, rather look at those who judge beauty with wisdom sister.

What is it that makes a lady who has stretch marks from giving birth beautiful in the eyes of the wise husband?

What is it that makes people with severe burns beautiful in the eyes of the ones they love?

You see, I personally hold the view, that beauty is a reflection in my eyes of what is withing, Wallahi, there is nothing more beautiful then a Muslimah on her deen, following the way of the Prophet and companions, peace be upon him, nothing more beautiful, that is why sometimes brothers find themselves thinking, SubhanAllah taht sister is beautiful, and then you think, wait, she is wearing niqab how can i say she's beautiful, it is only because of the way she carries herself, the way she walks in humilty, the way she impliments the sunnah and so forth..

There is nothing more beautiful than a servant of Allah who is upon the truth and is submitted to Him truly.

I know you might think, 'yea right, it wont help when I show him my scar' sister, if a person is shallow enough to leave you because of a scar then khalas leave that person no problem, he knows his limiations, but be sure, the one that embraces you even if you have a scar even if you are obese even if you have disabilities, that brother, inshaAllah will love you because of you as a person, because of your beauty that reflects from deep inside the beauty that will only grow instead of fade with time as you become wise.

You dont want nor need a foolish man,

I hope you believe me, at least that you believe that I think I am speaking the truth, cos I really do see it like this.

MashAllah bro, so nicely put. I agree wit u
Take his advice sis

Sister anonymous please listen to what I want to say. Some of us have flawless looks and some of us don't. So what?? It seems to me that the people with the not so attractive looks are luckier in a way. That way you know that the man who married you did not marry you for your looks. If you were very attractive and had a flawless face, someone may have married you mainly for that. You said that your sisters and your cousins are "beautiful" and got married one after the other. So how do you know their husbands didn't choose to marry them because of their external beauty??

At least you have the internal beauty which can be fully seen. So you don't have a perfect face. At least that will allow everyone to see your true beauty. That way you can be certain about the reason that someone chooses to marry you.

If you want to talk, feel free to pm me sister.

so right! lol

 

[Abu Ibraheem]

Salaam

Hey AG, there are plenty of new converts looking for marriage. You want to get married for the sake of Allah? In my view, most of them are the most suitable people for marriage because many superficial barriers are not present within them.

wasalaams

And i reckon that everybody should give Isa Abdullah lots of rep for the sincere, on point naseehah. Seriously that was heartfelt.

Digital storms words shone through strong aswell. Sis you have alot going for you. No worries, Allah is just, keep patience.

 

[GARY]

Often a person feels that a certain part of their appearance is much worse than others think. We tend to be harder on ourselves than other people are. I have not seen the scar on your face, but I believe it is quite possible that it is not as bad as you think. It just really bothers you because it is on your face. By coincidence I know a woman who was also scarred in an accident. She was really bothered by the scar, I still think that she looks great. She's beautiful.

 

[Firdaus]

problem by our sister

Sister, by your problem we all can see that your a true and pure person who has wished to share one of her most hardest story with us. Frankly it's not that easy. What i wanna you to know is that, always trust Allah and have confidence and hope in Him. For He will never disappoint nor discourage you unless you do haram stuff, which mashaa Allah YOU DON'T.!

So cheer up and continue to live in the true path, in the path whom Allah has blessed and not of those who has deserved his anger.

I will always remember you in my swalaat and will pray that insha Allah you get your MR Right!! Ameen!!

 

[Woodrow]

The difficulties with being young. Physical beauty is a great gift and those who have it need to be appreciative of it. Sadly many people who have physical beauty fail to use it in a pleasing manner. Physical beauty will often turn out to be simply hideous ugliness turned inside out.

Young people often fail to recognise what beauty is and see a temporary shell as their ideal. I know that at the moment you are experiencing much pain. But, please be patient and know that what you are now simply the begining of the true beauty you are developing into. Not only in Jannah, but also on this earth. This trial is giving you great patience in learning how to deal with the short comings of others. You are in the process of nuturing a beauty that will surpase that of your peers. Do not look upon this as a trial, it is a gift that will allow you to grow into a person of beauty and not as a dispensable commodity. Patience is the key, it will not be much longer and the beauty you now nuture will last long after the beauty of your friends fades.