She has embraced Islam but her husband is still a kaafir. What should she do?

[- Qatada -]

:salamext:


She has embraced Islam but her husband is still a kaafir. What should she do?​

Question:


What is the ruling about remaining in a marriage when the wife has become a Muslim but her husband is still a kaafir? She has children with him and is afraid that they may go astray and be lost, and she hopes that her husband may be guided to Islam if she stays with him.



Answer:


Praise be to Allaah.



As soon as a woman embraces Islam and her husband refuses to do likewise, the marriage is annulled and it is not permissible for her to live with him. But she should wait out the length of the ‘iddah period. If he embraces Islam, she may go back to him and the previous marriage contract is still counted as valid, but if he does not embrace Islam before the ‘iddah is over, then they are no longer married. If he subsequently embraces Islam and they want to get back together, a new marriage contract must be drawn up. It is not permissible to continue the marriage on the basis of being kind to him.

Majma’ al-Fiqh al-Islami (Islamic Fiqh Council), p. 43.



The children should follow the Muslim parent, so try your best to get custody of them. May Allaah help us and help you by His kindness and mercy.



Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=1826&ln=eng&txt=iddah
​

 

[- Qatada -]

:wasalamex


Try checking this link insha'Allaah:


Iddah denotes the waiting period that a woman is required to observe as a consequence of the nullification of her marriage with her husband or because of the husband's death.


Divorce: Islamic Procedure & Rulings
http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/...h-Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaE&cid=1119503543322



:salamext:

 

[Kidman]

omG, come on now. Maybe by her still living with her husband it will press on him and he will inshallah become muslim. You are not separate from people just because they don't convert when you do... what are you spreading here?

I know a muslim woman that has a christian husband and they get along just fine and have been getting along perfectly for over 15 years and still love each other 100%

Kidman

 

[Sunflower]

omG, come on now. Maybe by her still living with her husband it will press on him and he will inshallah become muslim. You are not separate from people just because they don't convert when you do... what are you spreading here?

I know a muslim woman that has a christian husband and they get along just fine and have been getting along perfectly for over 15 years and still love each other 100%

Kidman

spreading the deen - and i think that is the correct way because sooner or later there will be conflict and i swear it is not permissible for a muslim woman to be married to a non muslim?? and anyway what religion would the kids be brought up as?? half muslim half not it dont work like that!

 

[Kidman]

spreading the deen - and i think that is the correct way because sooner or later there will be conflict and i swear it is not permissible for a muslim woman to be married to a non muslim?? and anyway what religion would the kids be brought up as?? half muslim half not it dont work like that!

First off, children are not brought up one certain way. I know a lot of kids brought up in Muslim families that are a lot worse then those brought up in Christian families. Also, when the kid reaches the right age, where they can understand for themselves, if the parents are just parents they will let the child decide for him/her self. They actually do have children, and the girl is a practicing Muslim, and she 18 and wears the hijab and everything, and just turned 20 and is getting married to a very respectiful muslim herself. Nothing is wrong with their relationship and nothing is wrong with their children.

Maybe you guys shouldn't judge things what you don't know.

Kidman

 

[glo]

omG, come on now. Maybe by her still living with her husband it will press on him and he will inshallah become muslim. You are not separate from people just because they don't convert when you do... what are you spreading here?

I know a muslim woman that has a christian husband and they get along just fine and have been getting along perfectly for over 15 years and still love each other 100%

Kidman

Greetings, Kidman

I agree with you. But I guess Islamic ruling is Islamic ruling ...

We had this topic in the mixed female section, where I posted what the Bible teaches. This passage is directed at those members of the new church in Corinth, who had converted to Christianity but were married to non-believers:

If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.

But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? (1 Corinthians 7:12-16)

(I hope it's okay to post this passage here for comparison ... I am aware that this is the Marriage in Islam section. Mods, just zap this post, if you deem it inappropriate!)

Peace

 

[Kidman]

Greetings, Kidman

I agree with you. But I guess Islamic ruling is Islamic ruling ...

We had this topic in the mixed female section, where I posted what the Bible teaches. This passage is directed at those members of the new church in Corinth, who had converted to Christianity but were married to non-believers:

(I hope it's okay to post this passage here for comparison ... I am aware that this is the Marriage in Islam section. Mods, just zap this post, if you deem it inappropriate!)

Peace

Ya, that sounds wayyyy more reasonable. I don't know exactly where you are getting these islamic rulings from... but it might be different since i believe a different school of thought than most people here.

Kidman

Kidman

 

[glo]

Ya, that sounds wayyyy more reasonable. I don't know exactly where you are getting these islamic rulings from... but it might be different since i believe a different school of thought than most people here.

Kidman

That's interesting.
I always assumed all Islamic ruling was beyond questioning.
And I did not realise that there are different schools of thought ... but then I have learned virtually everything I know about Islam here in LI.

Peace

 

[- Qatada -]

Hi glo.



If a muslim woman was to marry a non muslim man and remain with him - she would put her own faith on the line, and also the faith of her children. Why is this? It's because a wife who loves her husband is usually prepared to obey him when he asks her to do something. If she doesn't obey him, he is likely to get angry with her right? which in return is likely to cause disunity or enmity within the marriage.



A woman has duties towards her Creator also, and these duties come before any of her duties towards the creation. This includes issues such as hijaab/covering herself up, the menstruation cycle [i.e. intimate relations are forbidden within that time of the month], fasting etc.

However, if her husband doesn't even accept these laws, and asks her to go out in a way which she will reveal herself to other men, or to have intimate relations at an unsuitable time, or for her to break her fasts when she should be fasting in the month of Ramadhan - then is that good for her faith? Isn't she in a dilemma on who to obey? What if she gives up her islaam due to the love of her husband? If she gives up her islaam, what chance do the children have?



It is out of Allaah Almighty's eternal wisdom to make some things permissible, and to make others forbidden. It is only out of His love for us, so we can die in a state of submission to Him, and in return be rewarded with His paradise which He has created for His believing slaves. Allaah is the Most Wise, the All Knowing.



Allaah Almighty knows best.



Peace.

 

[Umar001]

omG, come on now. Maybe by her still living with her husband it will press on him and he will inshallah become muslim. You are not separate from people just because they don't convert when you do... what are you spreading here?

I know a muslim woman that has a christian husband and they get along just fine and have been getting along perfectly for over 15 years and still love each other 100%

Kidman

I will just ask you something, are Muslim women allowed to Marry non-Muslim males, even from the People of the Book?

Ya, that sounds wayyyy more reasonable. I don't know exactly where you are getting these islamic rulings from... but it might be different since i believe a different school of thought than most people here.

Kidman

Kidman

Brother, are you also of the opinion that it's allowed to have a non-Muslim Khalifa?

Do you also hold the view that if a person divorces and someone marries that women then who ever marries her has commited adultery??

Also brother please tell me the school of thought you follow, I'm interested

your brother Eesa.

 

[Kidman]

I will just ask you something, are Muslim women allowed to Marry non-Muslim males, even from the People of the Book?




Brother, are you also of the opinion that it's allowed to have a non-Muslim Khalifa?

Do you also hold the view that if a person divorces and someone marries that women then who ever marries her has commited adultery??

Also brother please tell me the school of thought you follow, I'm interested

your brother Eesa.

I believe a Muslim guy can marry a non-muslim woman, but a woman cannot marry a non-muslim guy. But if they are currently married, and the woman becomes a muslim, she doesn't have to divorce him... she has the option to if she believes her faith is on the line.

I follow the school of Imam Sadiq.

Kidman

 

[Umar001]

I believe a Muslim guy can marry a non-muslim woman, but a woman cannot marry a non-muslim guy. But if they are currently married, and the woman becomes a muslim, she doesn't have to divorce him... she has the option to if she believes her faith is on the line.

I follow the school of Imam Sadiq.

Kidman

According to your school, what is the wisdom behind that??

 

[Curious girl2]

As-Salamu Alaykum

This is very interesting to me as I am in this exact situation!

I reverted 3 weeks ago after a very long period of soul searching. To cut a very long story short, I was a Christian, my father was a minister and my husband is also a Christian, although like I was, a rather disillusioned one. I had to think long and hard about reverting as I knew that Islamically, my marriage is long longer valid. But in the end the pull to Islam was too great and I knew that I had to revert.

As for my marriage, well for the time being I am still with him. Ignoring the fact we have 2 children and in raising those children we are a partnership, when we got married, we made vows, before God. Yes it was in church, but I made my vows to my husband, to and before God. The same God that I pray to now, only now I refer to him as Allah. I take those vows very seriously, marriage to me means *til death to us part*. Practicing Christians take marriage just as seriously as Muslims do. To leave my husband and end my marriage would mean breaking those vows that I made to him and to God. I am sure you can see my predicament.

Inshallah he will revert too, he is very interested and has started to attend the masjid and read the Qu'ran. I am making du'a that he will revert. The best think that could happen would be for my husband to revert before my Iddat ends, inshallah that will happen. If not, then I just dont know, I will have to cross that bridge if and when I come to it.

Peace
CG

 

[Umar001]

As-Salamu Alaykum

This is very interesting to me as I am in this exact situation!

I reverted 3 weeks ago after a very long period of soul searching. To cut a very long story short, I was a Christian, my father was a minister and my husband is also a Christian, although like I was, a rather disillusioned one. I had to think long and hard about reverting as I knew that Islamically, my marriage is long longer valid. But in the end the pull to Islam was too great and I knew that I had to revert.

As for my marriage, well for the time being I am still with him. Ignoring the fact we have 2 children and in raising those children we are a partnership, when we got married, we made vows, before God. Yes it was in church, but I made my vows to my husband, to and before God. The same God that I pray to now, only now I refer to him as Allah. I take those vows very seriously, marriage to me means *til death to us part*. Practicing Christians take marriage just as seriously as Muslims do. To leave my husband and end my marriage would mean breaking those vows that I made to him and to God. I am sure you can see my predicament.

Inshallah he will revert too, he is very interested and has started to attend the masjid and read the Qu'ran. I am making du'a that he will revert. The best think that could happen would be for my husband to revert before my Iddat ends, inshallah that will happen. If not, then I just dont know, I will have to cross that bridge if and when I come to it.

Peace
CG

Wa Aleykum Salam Wa Rhametulahi Wa Berekatu,

An oath of disobiedience should be broken, that's all am going to say.

If you want to stay with your husband thats your choice but Islamicly from what I have read it is not allowed and it is like fornication.

Your Brother Eesa.

 

[Kidman]

Wooow, you people are seriously.... nevermind.

Curious, be true to Allah, read the Quran, make up your own mind on what you believe to be the best for:
1) Allah
2) Your family
3) Yourself

Kidman

 

[*charisma*]

Assalamu Alaikum

ekhi, it's not us, this is the way of the deen. You either follow it, or you don't.

Staying with a nonmuslim husband promotes more fitnah. Think about it.

If a woman has to obey her husband and her husband is nonMuslim, what would happen if he asked her to cook pork? came home drunk? if he gambles? wants to have haram intercourse?? What if he doesn't want her to wear hijaab because he doesn't think it looks attractive, or doesn't allow her to pray cuz he'd rather her do something else? What about the kids? Should they be raised Islamically or the way of their father?

These are just a few of the problems that could occur.

We are different from the kaffirs and our way of life through Islam is supposed to portray that, even if we do have some things in common.

If her husband isn't Muslim, how's that going to help her islamically with her faith? They might love each other, yea I get that, but just as Allah says:

...But it is possible that ye dislike a thing which is good for you, and that ye love a thing which is bad for you. But Allah knoweth, and ye know not.
2:216

An ideal muslim should do whatever will better their iman and grant them more deeds inshallah.


fi aman Allah
w'salaam

 

[DaNgErOuS MiNdS]

I'm just curious to know, Is this the view of all four schools of thought?

 

[Umar001]

Wooow, you people are seriously.... nevermind.

Assalamu Aleykum Wa Rhametulahi Wa Berekatu Brother,
I love you for the sake of Allah

You were saying seriously what?? Doesn't sound as if it was going to be a good thing, I hope you don't let shaytan wispher at you brother.

You only answer one or two things, what about the other things I asked? You see, why don't you provide reasoning and understanding for others, why hide behind 'you people are seriously....nevermind' and then move on to give other advice, if I am wrong then correct me.

I have asked you if you'd allow a non-Muslim Khalifa, no answer, yet we know that the Man of the house is the responsible for them, and their leader, so you would not mind having a non-Muslim leader?

If you read the sister's post she did say

I had to think long and hard about reverting as I knew that Islamically, my marriage is long longer valid.

So theres no qualms there for the sister, why encourage her to do something which you have shown no proof for.

You claim although a sister can't marry a non-muslim, if she is married to him and reverts then she should stay with him, on what basis do you say this, where is your proof.

I find it sadening that you would start with "Wooow, you people are seriously.... nevermind." It is upsetting, and hurtful to me personally.

Eesa.

 

[MinAhlilHadeeth]

:salamext:

Please refrain from any sectarianism. Please fear Allah, and think about the effect our words have on others. JazakAllah khayr.

 

[Malaikah]

Kidman, please bring forth evidence for your claim.