Opposite Gender Concerns

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Re: Help, Now Comment Now!!

Also limitless i wouldnt think twice about marrying a girl in that state, Allah can heal whoever he wishes


All the best bro :)

:salamext:
 
Re: Help, Now Comment Now!!

IbnAbdulHakim said:
Also limitless i wouldnt think twice about marrying a girl in that state, Allah can heal whoever he wishes


All the best bro :)

:salamext:
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that is so true i dont think you should give up
i would also advise u 2 do istikhara:D

hope it works out 4 u
 
Re: Help, Now Comment Now!!

limitless said:
:sl:
she wants to become muslim for Allah sake not mine and understands islam.
:w:
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:salamext:

Masha'Allah Ta'ala, that is great news!! May she be guided in this life and stay upon the righteous path.

At least your Mother agrees Brother limitless, and Insha'Allah Ta'ala that if you tell her she will understand and help you and the Sister you wish to marry. Always trust Mothers as Heaven lies under their feet for us children, no matter if we get married or not, and your Mother will be able to lend a hand if she is understanding or why don't you let the Dear Sister speak to her herself and explain the situation like a mother-daughter chat that at are Masha'Allah Ta'ala very helpful as Mothers were also once young women.

Pray to Allah Ta'ala to help ease the pain and cure the illness of my Dear Sister's. Insha'Allah Ta'ala all of us here will pray for you and Insha'Allah Ta'ala, our prayers may be accepted by The Almighty, also my Dear Brother limitless this is a test and as long you stay in Islam, the right path, Insha'Allah Ta'ala everything will soon turn out fine.

:salamext:

P.S. Masha'Allah Ta'ala again on the Insha'Allah Ta'ala conversion into Islam of the Dear Sister!!!!!
 
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Re: Help, Now Comment Now!!

:sl:


If I am in your situation I will marry her. However, she have to be Muslim first. I also believe that you men leave Muslim girls on the side and get involved with non-Muslims. What do you think that a Muslim girsl raised in a Muslim family going to do when all Muslim men are going after others because they fell in love with them. Are Muslim girsl allowed to fall in love with non-Muslim men; even after converting them to Islam. Will yo allow this to happenn to your sister? I am sure you will not. So, why one standard for men and other for women. When the Muslim girl who is waiting for a Muslim man to love her and marry do not get a proposal and she wanders away in the evils of this society then these men are to be blamed and answerable in the day of judgement because they are the ones who started leaving these women alone and started to fall in love with others and then claiming that they did a good thing by converting non-Muslims to Islam. If you can answer these questionsn in your mind and are happy about the answers then you can do what you are doing. In this particular case if you were to marry this woman in any case with or without your parents permission and without caring for the Muslim girsl who could also be a right wife for you, then you shall go ahead and marry her whether she is terminally ill or not. In this case if you do not marry her then you are one big hypocrite because you are running away from responsibiliyt of taking care of her in her illness; in love you better take all that coms with it.


:w:
 
Re: Help, Now Comment Now!!

limitless said:
No, no! Why the heck should I let her convert for me? I don't want that.

And no. NO@~!!
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salamualikum.
you have misuderstood dude i never mentioned anything about you telling her to convert for you. Brother Ibn.... said it all i mean in your first post or something you said, ''she wants to become muslim for Allah sake not mine and understands islam.'' so if she wants to become a muslim tell her to go for it inshallah not for you though she needs to have it firmily in her heart.

by the way i guess my advice is dull so am out hope goes all well :)
Ma'assalama
 
Re: Help, Now Comment Now!!

If suppose the situation is turned around and you were then one who was found to be with cancer, then would you expect her to marry you? I am sure that if she leaves you knowing that you are now no good because you may die any time then you will call her a hypocrite. So, please do unto others that you expect them to do to you. This is a Golden rule for life and is also given to us by our Prophet SAW.

The Prophet SAWsaid: 'None of you is truly a believer until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.'
(Sahîh Muslim)


Now, if you don't marry her then are you going to go after some other love? Is your love real love or is it a fake love on sale and only good when the other side offers something of value to you. You are mocking the concept of love. What if your new love comes out with cancer after marriage? What if this love fo yours is just testing your real lovefor her by juts saying that she has cancer? I believe that people like you shall always be tested like this because you are in love for only your advanatge.

The Prophet SAW said: 'Show mercy to those on earth so that He who is in heaven will have mercy on you.'
(Sunan At-Tirmidhî)

.
 
Re: Religious and 'Hot' at the same time?

:sl:

i don't think talking to an imam is going to help as i think it isn't a fantastic topic to talk about with one as they're men.

i think you should read. books and the internet.

you can't be what he wants you to be or expect you to open up straigth away. he has to make you feel special and take it slowly. initiate conversations that you feel are not tooooo 'out there' but are not what YOU would usually talk about :statisfie

it'll surprise him.


lol

:w:
 
Re: Religious and 'Hot' at the same time?

As others have suggested it will get easier when you start living together. How long is your course and why can't you move in with your husband until you finish? Or maybe spending the weekend at his place.
 
Re: Religious and 'Hot' at the same time?

where r u studying? if at uni why don't you move into dorms and he can go with you?
 
okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

I'm going to be specific with my problem...
This is hard to believe..but I'm in love with 2 people....at the same time....
I jst cannot choose between them....
One has asked 4 my hard in marriage..he lives in England...
The other doesnt live in this country...and he spoke to me about it..but we didn't go into too much detail...
Its not that I'm what most people say 'playin' them..but I cnt keep saying I LOVE YOU to both of them...its one or the other..and since I cannot decide..I might have to give them both up...but that would be breaking their hearts...I already feel guilty...and that would just kill me...I would be able to live with myself...I really don't know what to do...I even avoid seeing them...when they call..I just ask my self 'should I pick that up?'
basically...It might be that I just like one and love the other..but I don't know which 1....
You'll probably want to know I let my self get carried away....
that is too complicate to explain so I'm not going to go into it...
plz make some suggestions....I'm so stressed and depressed over this matter...and I don't know if I can talk to them about it...its easier said than done..
thanks 4 your time...its quite long...sorry*
 
Re: okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

:sl: confusing yeah...but there may just be a solution Insha'Allah. You know that at the end of the day you're gonna have to choose one...I know it sounds like a stooopid suggestion but why don't you just do it? Pray to Allah to guide you to the right decision and ask for the help of family and friends, maybe they will be able to look at it with an objective view and help you decide which one will be best for you. Hope that helps. Take care :w: :)
 
Re: okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

thanks...I preciate your advice...
If I have to choose one..then I will have to be sure about my decision...because I don't want to have any regrets later on.
 
Re: okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

:salamext:

Try doing Istikharah sis Insha'Allah?
 
Re: okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

Anonymous Tester said:
thanks...I preciate your advice...
If I have to choose one..then I will have to be sure about my decision...because I don't want to have any regrets later on.
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I pray for Allah to guide you sis... :)
 
Re: okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

Assalamoalaikum,
I suggest u bring ur parents into it. They shall make an unregretable decision for u..Inshallah. And u won't blame urself forbreaking the men's hearts. U simply tell them, ur parents shall make the final decision.

When ppl r in love they tend to portray a very "lovable" image of themselves to their loved ones. Which sometimes isn't true. Both of them would be in this partial disguise.

Try to see through this disguise. DOn't just decide on how they r with u..but observe how they r with others. Which will help u see through their personalities.
 
Re: okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

Try don't see them for 3 days and see after this time who is missed the most. :-[ If you see both you will never be able to choose. Also, try to choose after their character.
 
Re: okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

:salamext:

i pray to Allah to guide you :)
 
Re: okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

but I cnt keep saying I LOVE YOU to both of them...its one or the other
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I'm not judging you but ^that^ means you told both men you love them? How would they feel if they knew? Cheated perhaps? I'm sorry but it's not on sis. Stop playing with their feelings. Choose one who's stronger in his deen and let the other poor guy off the hook. I don't mean to be horrible but imagine someone did that to you.
 
Re: okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

salaam sister. i had a friend who went through the same situation as you. well it comes down to who can you see yourself marrying? who makes you more happy, and who makes you feel more comfortable. i know its a hard decision ishallah you make the right decision. may allah guide you through sister
 
Re: okay..um I'm nt sure what 2 name this thread

:salamext:
I’m with sister Muslimah_Sis I won’t judge you. But you asked for advice and I will give you one as Muslim. This may sound harsh but it’s the truth. First of all, you’re not married to them but you’re telling them you love them. You’re not even supposed to talk to them to on the phone without a third person on another line. For the sake of your own self, fear Allah. If you’re serious about marrying any of these guys then get your parents or a guardian involve in this matter. you’re not Kaffir so stop imitating their behavior.
Please forgive me if I offended you and May Allah, The Most Merciful, forgive me as well. But I won't lie to you.
wsalam
-SI-
 

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