lonliness

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Assalamualikum

Yes you have someone which is Allaah!!

Ma'assalama
 
Owh akhee...don't say that.

May Allah subhanahuwaata'ala finds you a perfect and pious muslimah for you :) ameen...

His name was unusual and incomplete. Julaybib means "small grown" being the diminutive form of the word "Jalbab". The name is an indication that Julaybib was small and short, even of dwarf-like stature. More than that, he is described as being "damim" which means ugly, deformed, or of repulsive appearance.


Even more disturbing, for the society in which he lived, Julaybib's lineage was not known. There is no record of who his mother or his father was or to what tribe he belonged. This was a grave disability in the society in which he lived. Julaybib could not expect any compassion or help, any protection or support from a society that placed a great deal of importance on family and tribal connections. In this regard, all that was known of him was that he was an Arab and that, as far as the new community of Islam was concerned, he was one of the Ansar. Perhaps he belonged to one of the outlying tribes beyond Madinah and had drifted into the city or he could even have been from among the Ansar of the city itself.

The disabilities under which Julaybib lived would have been enough to have him ridiculed and shunned in any society and in fact he was prohibited by one person, a certain Abu Barzah of the Aslam tribe, from entering his home. He once told his wife: "Do not let Julaybib enter among you. If he does, I shall certainly do (something terrible to him)." Probably because he was teased and scoffed at in the company of men, Julaybib used to take refuge in the company of women. Was there any hope of Julaybib being treated with respect and consideration? Was there any hope of his finding emotional satisfaction as an individual and as a man? Was there any hope of his enjoying the relationships which others take for granted? And in the new society emerging under the guidance of the Prophet, was he so insignificant as to be overlooked in the preoccupation with the great affairs of state and in the supreme issues of life and survival which constantly engaged the attention of the Prophet?

Just as he was aware of the great issues of life and destiny, the Prophet of Mercy was also aware of the needs and sensibilities of his most humble companions. With Julaybib in mind, the Prophet went to one of the Ansar and said: "I want to have your daughter married."

"How wonderful and blessed, O Messenger of God and what a delight to the eye (this would be)," replied the Ansari man with obvious joy and happiness.

"I do not want her for myself," added the Prophet.

"Then for whom, O Messenger of God?" asked the man, obviously somewhat let down. "For Julaybib," said the Prophet.

The Ansari must have been too shocked to give his own reaction and he merely said: "I will consult with her mother." And off he went to his wife. "The Messenger of God, may God bless him and grant him peace, wants to have your daughter married," he said to her. She too was thrilled. "What a wonderful idea and what a delight to the eye (this would be)," she said.

"He doesn't want to marry her himself but he wants to marry her to Julaybib," he added. She was flabbergasted.

"To Julaybib! No, never to Julaybib! No, by the living God, we shall not marry (her) to him," she protested.

As the Ansari was about to return to the Prophet to inform him of what his wife had said, the daughter who had heard her mother's protestations, asked: "Who has asked you to marry me?"

Her mother told her of the Prophet's request for her hand in marriage to Julaybib. When she heard that the request had come from the Prophet and that her mother was absolutely opposed to the idea, she was greatly perturbed and said: "Do you refuse the request of the Messenger of God? Send me to him for he shall certainly not bring ruin to me." This was the reply of a truly great person who had a clear understanding of what was required of her as a Muslim. What greater satisfaction an d fulfillment can a Muslim find than in responding willingly to the requests and commands of the Messenger of God! No doubt, this companion of the Prophet, whose name we do not even know had heard the verse of the Quran: "Now whenever God and His Apostle have decided a matter, it is not for a believing man or believing woman to claim freedom of choice in so far as they themselves are concerned. And he who disobeys God and His Prophet has already, most obviously, gone astray." (The Quran, Surah al-Ahzab, 33:36).

This verse was revealed in connection with the marriage of Zaynab bint Jahsh and Zayd ibn al-Harithah which was arranged by the Prophet to show the egalitarian spirit of Islam. Zaynab at first was highly offended at the thought of marrying Zayd a former slave and refused to do so. The Prophet prevailed upon them both and they were married. The marriage however ended in divorce and Zaynab was eventually married to the Prophet himself. It is said that the Ansari girl read the verse to her parents and said : "I am satisfied and submit myself to whatever the Messenger of God deems good for me." The Prophet heard of her reaction and prayed for her: "O Lord, bestow good on her in abundance and make not her life one of toil and trouble."

Among the Ansar, it is said there was not a more eligible bride than she. She was married by the Prophet to Julaybib and they lived together until he was killed.
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source
 
Julaybib....isnt that a bit of a harsh example!! lol just messing.im sure night star is a carbon copy of julaybib...im kidding, im kidding! lol.
 
nightstar said:
Can someone tell me how to cure lonliness ,ive got no one to turn to .:scared:
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It mut be particulary har for muslims. , you're not allowed to go out and party, you're not allowed to listen to music, you're not allowed to dance, you have nothing to drown your loliness in...
I advice you go out with your friends and do something un-unislamic, such as sports...
 
Whatsthepoint said:
It mut be particulary har for muslims. , you're not allowed to go out and party, you're not allowed to listen to music, you're not allowed to dance, you have nothing to drown your loliness in...
I advice you go out with your friends and do something un-unislamic, such as sports...
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rofl,so the only fun thing to do in this life is party,dancing,etc...?
LOL

Alright,if you're lonely,try using your spare time getting a bit more cultivated...research history,wars,current events.pick up a new hobby,go running,read a book,swim,try cooking(lol)...there's a million things to do,learn and discover.

Go do some charity work,volunteer somewhere,insh'allah this will help you gain experience,knowledge,and it will be good for the soul...giving you a more positive outlook on the world,seeing as some people are off worse than you.Get more involved at your uni,if you guys have an MSA,get into that,it's pretty cool all the thing they organize there.

If all fails,do as the fellow before me has suggested,dance.In your room,alone,that is.hahahaha just kidding!
 
:sl:

nightstar said:
I'll be doing my partying in paradise inshallah
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LOL, that was a good one! May Allah (SWT) grant us all Paradise...ameen

I would say getting married is the best cure...well, actually it depends and the type of person you get married to. If you get married to someone who is kind, caring and loving towards you...kiss the loneliness goodbye if you get the opposite of that add 'depression' to that!

Anyways, make lots of du'a to Allah (SWT)

salam
 
Assalam o Allikum
lonliness can be very fustrating and depressing.. even when your life is full of stuff to do... the one thing you want most is some company or love/affection.

Obviously "getting married" isnt as simple as it sounds.
If you do want a quick fix and have time and are able to look after a pet i would suggest you go down this route. I myself to overcome lonliness adopted cats ( i have 2 now ) who gave me so much affection and even when "they" demand hugs its comforting to know i can give and recieve affection.

Buy a cat. Then buy a lazar-pointer.

Combine the two for hours of amusement.
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^^^^ very true but anyways... if you cant get married .. get a pet. just a suggestion.
 
Jazakallah brothers and sisters for all your help, i will take all you have said on board inshallah. I think i just need a big hug thats all, but i cant get a halal hug at the minute, oh well i will hug my pillow instead
 
Whatsthepoint said:
It mut be particulary har for muslims. , you're not allowed to go out and party, you're not allowed to listen to music, you're not allowed to dance, you have nothing to drown your loliness in...
I advice you go out with your friends and do something un-unislamic, such as sports...
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man if thats what you call fun, then not only am I gald I dont do it but i feel sorry for anyone else who drowns there sorrows in beer and dancing hahahaahahahaha.
 
nightstar said:
I'll be doing my partying in paradise inshallah
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well said bro..:)

but i cant understand how can one feel lonely while he has access to internet :)....i will suggest u if u cant do anythng suggested above then just get lost in the world of internet:).......
 
You should get a pet or start a hobby that requires you to interact with others.
 
Belief_is_Power said:
man if thats what you call fun, then not only am I gald I dont do it but i feel sorry for anyone else who drowns there sorrows in beer and dancing hahahaahahahaha.
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I don't drink when I'm sad, I prefer listening to music, reading a book, watching a movie. People usually drink alcohol at parties, when they hang out with their friends. Why? In order to relax, because it tastes good, whatever.
It's true that a lot of people drink because their depressed and all. It may help them for a while, so tey'll drink more and more until they are addicted.
 
Whatsthepoint said:
It mut be particulary har for muslims. , you're not allowed to go out and party, you're not allowed to listen to music, you're not allowed to dance, you have nothing to drown your loliness in...
I advice you go out with your friends and do something un-unislamic, such as sports...
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who told you sports is haram? dont bring ignorant crap like that plz, the prophet and his companions used to do things considered sports, such as sprint races, and horse riding.

as for partying or listening to music, are u insane? music makes a person even feel more lonely, and what about partying? ive been to so many parties, u cant get a meaningful relationship from a party, so your advice is not very good indeed, the man is obviously in need of a LONG TERM PARTNER, not a drunk vommiting girl who can barely know whats going on, thats called date rape. is that what your calling for? here is the civilized west on display ey, thank GOD this is un-Islamic, its nothing to be ashamed off.

its not hard at all to be Muslim, your lonely, want a female companion, sure, go look for a wife, Islam encourages it, Islam is 200% pro marriage religion......you want a one night stand for him? is this the respect for women u come telling us about later? yes we respect women soooooooooooooooooooo muchhhhhh that we go to parties to find us a nice drunk gal to sleep with her for one night and leave her by the morning and show off to our friendsssssssssssss because i was so lonelyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. so you see women as a sex object for u dont u? its obvious, u told him go to a party, why a party? why not a gathering or something? why a party? because lots of drunk girls crazy girls etc, and he could get laid, one night stand....hmmmmmmmm you obviously need help, and you just show why Islam is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MARRIAGE FOR LIFE! down with the one night stand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
The_Prince said:
who told you sports is haram? dont bring ignorant crap like that plz, the prophet and his companions used to do things considered sports, such as sprint races, and horse riding.
I said sport is un-unislamic. I didn't want to say sport is islamic, beacuse that would imply it is a part of the faith.

as for partying or listening to music, are u insane? music makes a person even feel more lonely
depends on the music
and what about partying? ive been to so many parties, u cant get a meaningful relationship from a party, so your advice is not very good indeed, the man is obviously in need of a LONG TERM PARTNER, not a drunk vommiting girl who can barely know whats going on, thats called date rape. is that what your calling for? here is the civilized west on display ey, thank GOD this is un-Islamic, its nothing to be ashamed off.
You can get a maningful relationship from party, you can at least begin it there.
And it's not like you have to get laid at a party. You can simply party, listen to the music, talk, dance, have fun.

its not hard at all to be Muslim, your lonely, want a female companion, sure, go look for a wife, Islam encourages it, Islam is 200% pro marriage religion......you want a one night stand for him?
I agree with you. there's a great deal of difference between a girfriend or a vife) and a girl you met downtown.
I didn't know he was looking for a wife, i though he just wanted company. and i didn't advise him on any of the things you mentiond.
is this the respect for women u come telling us about later? yes we respect women soooooooooooooooooooo muchhhhhh that we go to parties to find us a nice drunk gal to sleep with her for one night and leave her by the morning and show off to our friendsssssssssssss because i was so lonelyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
Sorry, but not all people do that
so you see women as a sex object for u dont u?
No, I see them as completely equal human beings and i am not being sarcastic
its obvious, u told him go to a party, why a party? why not a gathering or something? why a party? because lots of drunk girls crazy girls etc, and he could get laid, one night stand....hmmmmmmmm you obviously need help, and you just show why Islam is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MARRIAGE FOR LIFE! down with the one night stand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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He can go to a gathering...
I advised him to do some sports with his (male) frends, that's all.
 
Whats the point, dont worry i know where your coming from, I respect your beliefs and culture, people in the west do go out and party , that is entirely up to you.

But its not what i wanna do,
 

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