relationship

[AnonymousPoster]

i have been going out with a guy for a couple of years now. everytime i want to end it i dont know how to because he has a sight problem and he says he needs me etc.and i have been their for him when he needed me. how can i end it? and if i do can we talk as friends? as he has recently had an operation and i have been their supporting him. marriage is out of the question his family will never accept it how can i ask allah to forgive me?

 

[Nájlá]

are u still going out with him or not?

 

[Umm Hurairah]

Asalaamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatu,

he says he needs me etc.

Why does he NEED you? You mentioned he had a family so aren't they enough for him?

This whole world is a test. Everything in it is a test. Allah (SWT) knows what is best for you.

"...And it may be that you like something which is bad for you, and you dislike something which is good for you; Allah knows and you do not."
​

how can i end it?

Explain to him that you two staying in contact is HARAAM in Islam. Marriage is the only way you two can keep in contact.

and if i do can we talk as friends?

No because he is your Non-Mahram.

his family will never accept it

Why not? Have you tried talking to them yet? Have YOUR parents agreed to it? Is the guy a Muslim?

Do Istikhara and if it is positive then Alhamdulillah and if not then...love hurts...move on with life Insha Allah.

how can i ask allah to forgive me?

Pray, pray, pray, make duaa, pray, read the Quran, and PRAY.

Allah the Almighty said: "O son of Adam, so long as you call upon Me and ask of Me, I shall forgive you for what you have done, and I shall not mind. O son of Adam, were your sins to reach the clouds of the sky and were you then to ask forgiveness of Me, I would forgive you. O son of Adam, were you to come to Me with sins nearly as great as the earth and were you then to face Me, ascribing no partner to Me, I would bring you forgiveness nearly as great at it."
​

 

[Intisar]

Okay, that ''relationship'' is haraam full-stop, your needing to ''help'' him is no excuse whatsoever! You can't make what Allaah Ta'ala made haraam, halal. If you want to truly obey your Creator, then marry him the proper Islaamic way. In such situations, it's best that you pray istikhara and ask Allaah sincerely for guidance. Be patient.

 

[noorseeker]

Sister , gradually stop seeing him, things get better with time

 

[noorahmad]

if you love him, y not try marry him!!

 

[piXie]

i have been going out with a guy for a couple of years now. everytime i want to end it i dont know how to because he has a sight problem and he says he needs me etc.

Sorry to hear about your situation AG.

If he needs you like he says he does, then he should marry you despite what his family says. If he feels he cannot do that, and go against his family, then that is his choice, and he has NO right to stop you from leaving him after that, which you must do, as your duty to Allah comes FIRST. Islam strictly forbids any relationships between a man and woman who are not married and it has been proven in many Ahadith that the one who involves themselves in illegal man-woman relationships, and does not sincerely repent, is punished in this world, the grave, and the hereafter. Therefore, there is no other option but for you to both marry each other and live together, or to leave each other. And this is better for both your deen and your duniya. Be firm and make this clear to him, without letting him play with your emotions or making you feel guilty.

I pray Allah makes it easy for you, and forgives us all our mistakes. Aameen.

 

[Tania]

Sorry to hear about your situation AG.

If he needs you like he says he does, then he should marry you despite what his family says. If he feels he cannot do that, and go against his family, then that is his choice, and he has NO right to stop you from leaving him after that, which you must do, as your duty to Allah comes FIRST.

Very good advice and i always sustained the fact the man are the head of family. If he is not able to be the head and take responsabilities i really can't think what will be his position inside of the family :-[ He should protect you, not burden you with this.

 

[ikaj]

Asalaamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatu,

Why does he NEED you? You mentioned he had a family so aren't they enough for him?

This whole world is a test. Everything in it is a test. Allah (SWT) knows what is best for you.

"...And it may be that you like something which is bad for you, and you dislike something which is good for you; Allah knows and you do not."
​

Explain to him that you two staying in contact is HARAAM in Islam. Marriage is the only way you two can keep in contact.

No because he is your Non-Mahram.

Why not? Have you tried talking to them yet? Have YOUR parents agreed to it? Is the guy a Muslim?

Do Istikhara and if it is positive then Alhamdulillah and if not then...love hurts...move on with life Insha Allah.

Pray, pray, pray, make duaa, pray, read the Quran, and PRAY.

Allah the Almighty said: "O son of Adam, so long as you call upon Me and ask of Me, I shall forgive you for what you have done, and I shall not mind. O son of Adam, were your sins to reach the clouds of the sky and were you then to ask forgiveness of Me, I would forgive you. O son of Adam, were you to come to Me with sins nearly as great as the earth and were you then to face Me, ascribing no partner to Me, I would bring you forgiveness nearly as great at it."
​

What is istikhara?

 

[Ummu Sufyaan]

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