Dear somebody...

Dear Diet Coke,

I feel like you´re overreacting.

Sincerely, Mentos

*****

We did this experiment in highschool...

*****

Dear Americans,

You call it illegal immigration, we call it karma.

Sincerely, Native Americans

This one's kind of sad...
*****

Dear potato chip companies,

I am not an optimist; that bag is half empty.

Sincerely, consumer

So true.
The obese people vs skinny people is just wrong
Salam

HAHA! Reading this was a perfect end to my night and I read all of them too =$

haha great post! I now have a laptop covered in tea lol

lol dearblankpleaseblank?

I like some of these XD

But just a point to make, almost all Mexicans are at least part Native American. Only 10% have no Native American Ancestry. And a further 30% Have absolutely no European ancestry.

Dear Obama,
Please give me back my status as incarnation of left-wing politics.
Sincerely, Marx

Dear D&D 4e,
Stop trying to take our market share. Pen & paper games don't work that way.
Sincerely, WoW

Dear everyone and everything,
God hates you.
Sincerely, Fred Phelps

Dear leper,
Sorry, pre-existing conditions not covered.
Sincerely, Republican Jesus

Dear atheists,
Stop misquoting me.
Sincerely, Nietzsche

OOOhhh... how did I miss this thread?

format_quote Originally Posted by sister harb

Dear Circle, You're pointless. Sincerely, Square

This appeals to the geek in me.

Dear Pluto,

I still think you're a planet. Don't lose hope.

Sincerely, Moon


Dear Moon,

Pluto was not planet, he is my dog.

Sincerely, Mickey Mouse

*****

Dear bed,

Every time I leave you, I die a little inside.

Sincerely, nights aren't long enough


Dear night,

Every time you leave me, I sleep for a day, inside my coffin.

Sincerely, Count Dracula

*****

Dear Other Continents,

Please stop using me as an example when referring to starving children. There are hungry kids EVERYWHERE.

Sincerely, Africa


Dear Africa,

Tell Bob Geldof to make new Live Aid concert for us.

Sincerely, Asia, Europe, America, Australia

*****

Dear grammar,

Please come back. We miss you.

Sincerely, the literate people of the internet


Dear the literate people of the internet,

Wait a minutes, does you mean we was always wrote in non-correct grammar ?

Sincerely, illiterate people of the internet

*****

Dear almost empty shampoo bottle,

I see we speak the same language.

Sincerely, ketchup bottle.


Dear ketchup bottle,

You are wrong, that "made in Thailand" shampoo does not speaks English.

Sincerely, softdrink bottle

*****

Dear Facebook,

Congratulations on becoming a verb. Welcome to the club.

Sincerely, Google


Dear Google,

What club ? Google Adsense ? No way ! I have my own advertising program !

Sincerely, Facebook

*****

Dear cellphone,

Please invent a "take back your text" option.

Sincerely, accidental awkward text messager


Dear accidental awkward text messager,

They can't. But if you think your message was awkward, why don't you join in

"Awkward Moments" thread in IB ?.

Sincerely, not Beardo

*****

Dear World,

Please stop freaking out about 2012. Our calendar ends there because some Spanish

idiots invaded our country and we got a little busy...

Sincerely, the Mayans


Dear Mayans,

It's disappoint me. I thought your calendar ends because you turned into Islamic calendar.

Sincerely, Muslims

*****

Dear Kids,

There is no Santa. Those presents are from your parents.

Sincerely, Wikileaks


Dear Wikileaks,

Those gifts were bought by the parents, but who delivered those gifts to the kids ?

Sincerely, Rudolph the red nose deer

*****

Dear Mathematicians,

Here's a hint: X will always equal 10.

Sincerely, The Romans


Dear Romans,

My movie title is not "30" but "XXX"

Sincerely, Vin Diesel

*****

Dear Circle,

You're pointless.

Sincerely, Square


Dear Square,

You say my brother, Circle, is pointless. But do you know ?, I have more points than yours.

Sincerely, Octagon

*****

Dear Facebook,

Please add an unlike button.

Sincerely, Writing "Unlike" in the comments


Dear,

It's already exist. Can't you see it ?. Unlike other people, you can't see the button.

Sincerely, Facebook

*****

Dear Copy & Paste,

Thanks for existing, I just did my homework in 8 minutes.

Sincerely, Happy teenager with lots more time for fun now


Dear Happy teenager with lots more time for fun now,

I want to talk with you in my room, ...... RIGHT NOW ..!!!

Sincerely, your teacher


*****

Dear one red sock,

Not cool man.

Sincerely, all the white laundry


Dear all the white laundry,

Luckily I never established All The Black Laundry in my country.

Sincerely, Nelson Mandela

*****

Dear world,

Some of us are males!

Sincerely, ladybugs


Shut up ! you moron !

we are in undercover duty in female dormitory !

Not sincerely, agent Smith from Ladybugs Secret Service

*****

Dear person singing,

Proud to be your stage.

Sincerely, the shower


Dear the shower,

Unfortunately, you are too small for us.

Sincerely, New York City choir

*****

Dear Americans,

You call it illegal immigration, we call it karma.

Sincerely, Native Americans


Dear Native American,

We know what you feel. But, believe us, you are not alone.

Sincerely, Australian Aborigins

*****

Dear Santa Claus,

The toys are ready to ship to the North Pole!

Sincerely, China


Dear China,

Cancel that !. Nowadays kids want to have Ipod, cellphone and Blackberry as their gifts.

Sincerely, Santa Claus

*****

Dear Paleontologist,

No amount of digging us up is going to bring us back. Just let it go man... let it go...

Sincerely, Dinosaurs


Dear Dinosaurs,

Were you the actors in my movie ?

Sincerely, Steven Spielberg

*****

Dear Glasses,

Please stop creeping down my nose. I'm going to freak out on you in a second. Your really annoying.

Sincerely, Blind Without You


Dear Blind Without Glasses,

Why don't you wear me ?

Sincerely, contact lens

*****

Dear Head,

Please stop hurting now. I'm giving in with this triple shot of espresso. Truce?

Sincerely, Caffeine Addict


Dear caffeine addict,

Your triple shot is not so dangerous like my single shot.

Sincerely, Magnum .45

*****

Dear teenagers,

You will never win.

Sincerely, acne


Dear acne

But my acne cream always won over you

Sincerely, teenager

*****

Dear villains who are always trying to destroy the world,

...then what?

Sincerely, realist


Dear realist,

Then American heroes come, defeat the villains, and save the world.

Sincerely, Hollywood

*****

Dear mascara,

You're not the only one she opens her mouth for.

Sincerely, contact lenses


Dear contact lenses,

Is the mascara a food ?

Sincerely, eye shadow

*****

Dear people who "lose" things a lot,

We just needed to borrow it. You'll find it exactly where you left it tomorrow.

Sincerely, ninjas


Dear ninjas,

Don't steal people's properties. You'll give ninjas a bad name.

Sincerely, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

*****

Dear Women,

Owned.

Sincerely, Chocolate


Dear chocolate,

Please tell them, don't ever forget their beautiful childhood with me.

Sincerely, lollypop

*****

Dear Spiderman,

Radioactive spiders do not exist. You are just a highly evolved spider monkey.

Sincerely, Charles Darwin


Dear Mr.Darwin

Why you spread a big lie like this ? are you working for D.C Comics ?

Sincerely, Marvel Comics

*****

Dear IKEA,

How much would it cost for me to live here?

Sincerely, this is way better than my room


Dear,

Forget IKEA, I will give you free of charge if you want to live here.

Sincerely, Abu Ghraib prison

*****

Dear extraordinary,

If you are extra ordinary, doesn't that just make you even more ordinary?

Sincerely, confused


Dear confused,

Do you want to make a trouble with us?

Sincerely, The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen

*****

Dear Musicians,

I've never been more popular. Use me in your next song and I guarantee millions of plays. Allow me to take my rightful place as king of the instrument world.

Sincerely, Vuvuzela


Dear Vuvuzela,

If I could hear your sound I would use you in my 9th Simphony.

Sincerely, Ludwig Von Bethoven

*****

Dear girl on the bus,

No, your Louis Vuitton handbag does not need its own seat.

Sincerely, move over


Dear more over,

Move from my seat! It's the time to departure.

Sincerely, the bus driver

*****

Dear Hippies,

I don't believe we've met...

Sincerely, Soap


Dear soap,

The world has been changed. Now Hippies begin to use you, and The Skinhead begin to use me.

Sincerely, shampoo

*****

Dear LOL,

Thanks for being there for me when times get awkward.

Sincerely, I have nothing else to say


Dear,

Don't you have anything else to say ?. No problem, you have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in...........

Sincerely, Los Angeles Police Department

*****

Dear 2012,

I'm sorry, I have failed. It is up to you now.

Sincerely, H1N1


Dear H1N1,

Are you brother of my neighbor, H1ND1 ?

Sincerely, Urdu

*****

Dear Nike,

Please stop telling people to just do it, that's my job.

Sincerely, peer pressure


Dear peer pressure,

Will you work for us

Sincerely, Adidas

*****

Dear dentist,

Yes that's a cavity, please stop poking it.

Sincerely, seriously it hurts


Dear seriously it hurt

First, I am not dentist. Second, I thought it's autopsy

Sincerely, forensic doctor

*****

Dear Children,

Please stop wondering what I am. I'm a star. You just said it like two seconds ago.

Sincerely, Twinkle-twinkle


Dear Twinkle-twinkle,

Don't waste your time. Nowadays kids sing Justin Bieber songs and have forget about us.

Sincerely, Mary & Old McDonald

*****

Dear Greenland,

We've successfully deceived the tourists. Good work.

Sincerely, Iceland


Dear Iceland and Greenland,

Did you deceive me?. Not you! but my travel agent!. I told them I want to visit Iceland and Greenland, and they brought me to Hagen-Dazs Cafe and Guatemalan Army base!

Sincerely, a tourist

*****

Dear Diet Coke,

I feel like you´re overreacting.

Sincerely, Mentos


Dear Mentos,

Good job, good job.

Sincerely, Pepsi

*****

Dear girls who tormented me in 7th grade because I was smarter than you,

I need you to work overtime tomorrow.

Sincerely, Your Boss


Dear Boss,

Why not today ? tomorrow I will become the president.

Sincerely, daughter of the company owner

*****

Dear Yahoo,

I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...

Sincerely, Google


Dear Google,

When people got happily surprise they never yelled "Goooogleee ....!" but always.....

Sincerely, Yahoo

*****

Dear 2010,

So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WHAT happened?!

Sincerely, 1985


Dear 1985,

You wrong. The best rapper is Eminem and the president is Obama, ... not us.

Sincerely, Norman White & Jeremy Black

*****

Dear Facebook,

Just wait, one day they'll abandon you as well.

Sincerely, Myspace


Dear Myspace,

We are very happy if we can wait that time until the end of the world.

Sincerely, Facebook

*****

Dear alarm clock,

Can't you see that I'm in the middle of a good dream?!

Sincerely, please shut up


Dear please shut up

Just sleep again, sleep again, you are on Elm Street.

Sincerely, Fredy Krueger

*****

Dear conscience,

You're dismissed.

Sincerely, I don't really care anymore


Dear you,

Don't dismiss your conscience, you are not a lawyer.

Sincerely, a honest one

*****

Dear internal clock,

Weekends are not school days.

Sincerely, didn't want to wake up at 7 am


Dear those who didn't want to wake up at 7 am,

Weekend or not weekend, we always wake up before the dawn, not at 7 am.

Sincerely, Muslims


*****

Dear Twix,

Need a moment? Seriously... That's your slogan? Give me a break.

Sincerely, Kit-Kat


Hey Twix and Kit-Kat ..!!!

Get lost! you break our special moment ..!!

Not sincerely, Just married couple

*****

Dear skinny people,

At least if I get stabbed I'm more likely to survive.

Sincerely, obesity does have it's benefits


Dear obesity does have it's benefits,

Tell those skinny people if you have another benefit for people like me.

Sincerely, Sumo wrestler

*****

Dear time,

Why do you crawl when I'm at work but fly by when I'm having fun?

Sincerely, pick a consistent mode of transportation


Dear pick a consistent mode of transportation,

Your clock needs to be repaired.

Sincerely, watch & clock repairman

*****

Dear potato chip companies,

I am not an optimist; that bag is half empty.

Sincerely, consumer


Dear consumer,

Don't tell me you want more potato chips but you don't have money.

Sincerely, store owner

*****

Dear Egypt,

I heard you need a new president. Well, I need a summer job.

Sincerely, this might be perfect


Dear this might be perfect,

Need a summer job? No way! I know what you did last summer.

Sincerely, scream

*****

Dear mosquitoes,

At least we give people honey.

Sincerely, bees


Dear bees,

People sold your honey and gone rich. But what did they give for you ?. Stop giving honey to those capitalists!

Sincerely, Karl Marx

*****

Dear people who complain that Disney's Pocahontas is not historically accurate,

Wait you mean she didn't go to a talking tree for advice?!

Sincerely, it's just a movie


Dear it's just a movie,

Histories were written by the winner. And who won the Indian War?

Sincerely, someone

*****

Dear women,

Please stop blaming me for those extra ten pounds.

Sincerely, the camera


Dear camera,

Those women are blaming me too.

Sincerely, the mirror

*****

Dear evolution,

It's okay, who needs flying when we've got these nifty tuxedos?

Sincerely, penguins


Dear penguins,

Thanks for the good words. We will use it in our new ad campaign.

Sincerely, Hugo Boss

*****

Dear life,

When I muttered, "Could things get any worse?" it was a rhetorical question, not a

challenge.

Sincerely, nervous wreck


Dear nervous wreck,

When I said "to be or not to be" that's a question, not giving option.

Sincerely, Hamlet

*****

Dear everyone,

S O R R Y - F O R - M A K I N G - Y O U - Y E L L - I N - Y O U R - H E A D !

Sincerely, caps lock


Dear caps lock,

76545456 091231 8789

Sincerely, num lock

*****

Dear Newton,

Had you really never seen anything else fall down before?

Sincerely, the apple


Dear apple,

I had never seen carrot that fell from its tree.

Sincerely, Sir Issac Newton

*****

Dear You,

Smile. You're beautiful.

Sincerely, Me


Dear me,

Your smile look so beautiful.

Sincerely, the Narcissist

*****

Dear Grouchy Feminists,

Please don't take my chivalry the wrong way. I'm opening a door for you because it's

courteous, not because I think you can't do it yourself.

Sincerely, A Nice Guy


Dear Nice Guy,

As a doorman, opening the door is your duty, you know?!

Sincerely, the hotel manager

*****

Dear Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry,

Please send me my letter already. I'm tired of the Muggle world.

Sincerely, the kid who still believes in magic


Dear kids who still believes in magic,

Don't you know? magic is haram.........!!!!

Sincerely, Shaykh Ardianto al-Islamicboardi

Dear teenagers,

You will never win.

Sincerely, acne

Best one out of the first bunch