I feel like I've been lying to myself for too long, when i was a child i never questioned my faith nor my religion or maybe I wasn't really that interested. But as i grew older into my teens social life took over my spiritual and well you can say i lost my way and well my Muslim friends tell me im on the wrong path.
Now Im 18 currently finishing up my A-Levels hoping to start a new chapter in Uni soon. I guess over the Xmas period I've had a lot of time to reflect on my life so far and i wouldn't say I've been the best Muslim far from it. When i mean I've been lying to myself i guess well my family is strict Muslim and I been lying to them and me by doing what is expected of me as a Muslim, Friday prayers,salah etc but privately i have reserves about Islam and I've tried to suppress and forget about them. But i realise its wrong to pray when your heart is not set on it and doing it for the sake of it, don't get me wrong i believe in a God but is Islam the religion i belong to unfortunately i would say ?.
I guess im trying to find my way spiritually and me writing and telling people about it to find a solution is the right thing to do i suppose, so i might go on for a bit lmao.........
Uni is the perfect place to ask the deep questions about life: Who am I? What is my purpose? Does God exist? Are any of the religions true?
I can see that you want to be honest person: someone who doesn't believe something out of tradition or pure blind faith. Questions and doubts inevitably lead us to the truth, although it is always a difficult process to go through. If we are to be honest with ourselves, we have to have good reasons for our beliefs or we shouldn't believe them at all. At Uni you'll be able to look into the evidence for the different religions: read their books, investigate their histories, examine their beliefs. My advice is just to ask as many questions as you can to as many people as you can: think about whether their answers make sense, and if they are based on evidence and reason.
Best of luck in your search for what you should believe.
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