My father is a non-practising Christian and my mother is a practising Christian. I live in Canada, am University educated, and also work in the skilled trades. My life is going pretty good at the moment.
I grew up in Toronto which has a lot of immigrants and is very multicultural. So, when I was about 16 or so, I started dating a practicing Muslim girl in high school, she was from Afghanistan. We dated for almost 4 years, then broke up, she is now married. We had sex with each other, so we took each others' virginity. Then again when I was about 22 or so, I started dating another practicing Muslim girl, from Iran, this time it lasted about a year and a half then we broke up. We also had sex. Then within the past 2 years I've been on-and-off dating another (non-practicing) Muslim girl from Iran, but I am currently single, and we've had sex. I've also casually dated maybe 10 or 20 other Muslim girls, but it's been casual dating and maybe kissing, nothing too serious. Mostly Iranians and Afghans, a few Iraqis as well.
So, because of my experiences with Muslim girls, I've kind of always been around Islam since a teenager, and quite frankly I love the culture and the set of ideals associated with Islam. What really bothers me, as a White male, about Canada is this emphasis on "gender equality" and "feminism" when the reality is that men and women are different and were created that way to have different roles on purpose.
I have always looked up to the Islamic way of life, and even with men, I always respect Muslim guys I meet at work or out socially.
I guess what I'm saying is, I've been thinking about converting to Islam for the past few years, and maybe now it's time I'd like to do it.
The problem, though, is that I don't think I would be a good Muslim. I have sex with a lot of different girls, and sometimes I even pay for it with prostitutes and film it even though I am good looking and can often get sex for free. I'm also a bit perverted sexually. I don't want to change that, it's part of who I am. I know that is not the way a Muslim is supposed to conduct himself.
So, what I'm asking is, if its OK that I convert but still engage in the above? I respect and love the Islamic culture 100%, and I have for over 10 years now.
What does everyone think about this? Would it be OK if I convert but just do so as a "moderate" or slightly non-practicing but still believing Muslim? I wouldn't want to give a bad representation of Islam, so I would keep my views to myself even if I convert.
If u believe , Islam is the Truth , then accept it without delay. We don't know when we meet death.
If u die as a disbeliever , u will be in fire forever. If u die as a bad Muslim , after spending few days / month's /year's in hell fire , one day u will be forgiven by the mercy of Allah, will be admitted to paradise.
If u become Muslim , stop doing the publicity of your sins. We are not encouraged to do so. Your sin that God Almighty kept secret , u must not spread it out proudly.
May Allah guide u to the Truth.
Last edited by Muslim Woman; 06-09-2016 at 07:04 AM.
Read the Noble Quran and you may be guided provided you seek your Lord , your Creator, Allah sincerely since these remaining few (might be - tomorrow is unsure )10's of years will pass just like few years and we will be at the Grave ( just think how your past 20-30 years have passed quickly)
Exposing sins in Islam is a greater sin so look for the future.
Understand Your Creator's word or the Letter of our Creator to each one of us first ,THE Noble Quranhttp://www.altafsir.com/Tafasir.asp?...0&LanguageId=2 and accept Islam and establish Salat (5 times a day) and that will relieve you from all your sins. You are asking LIKE the tribes and Leaders of Banu Taqif (of Taif ) asked our Prophet about AN ALLOWANCE OF NOT abstaining from Zina (unmarried sex) since almost every one of them was in it so they thought it was impossible for them to come out of it. But a friend of them encouraged them saying ''do you know many of those who have accepted Islam and had become pure were once also like us , So if they can change so should we ''
So its the greatest sin than adultery to die as a NON BELIEVER of the Creator who had designed you and provided free air, water and sustenance with little effort , this sin called kuffar or shirk (joining partners to the Creator ) is unforgivable than that. Once you accept Islam all your past sins are forgiven and marry (a muslim might be your old muslim GF) and both of you put things straight and enter full Islam and You will be saved from hell (in both the worlds here & hereafter), inshallah . Ameen
Heck no u can't go to prostitutes and sleep around with females dude - are you bloody insane?
s.....
why you all glossing around the issue? We ain't desperate for converts - especially with people like this.
we are a people of integrity - not excuses.
im really appalled at the responses in this thread so far.
you talk of exposing sins when you haven't told him its haraam and cannot be done? You can answer for his sins on the day of judgement you bloody fools.
Scimi
Last edited by Muslim Woman; 06-09-2016 at 10:02 AM.
Heck no u can't go to prostitutes and sleep around with females dude - are you bloody insane?
shieeet
why you all glossing around the issue? We ain't desperate for converts - especially with people like this.
we are a people of integrity - not excuses.
im really appalled at the responses in this thread so far.
you talk of exposing sins when you haven't told him its haraam and cannot be done? You can answer for his sins on the day of judgement you bloody fools.
Scimi
Brother, I think you should calm down and try to explain it to him.
dude ur bit harsh and u should always advise people with gentleness..
As for the post no u shouldnt continue with zina cos thats one biggest sins to commit also u shouldnt show it openly also..but believe islam i say u should convert but i would stay away from major sins.
Heck no u can't go to prostitutes and sleep around with females dude - are you bloody insane?
s.....
why you all glossing around the issue? We ain't desperate for converts - especially with people like this.
we are a people of integrity - not excuses.
im really appalled at the responses in this thread so far.
you talk of exposing sins when you haven't told him its haraam and cannot be done? You can answer for his sins on the day of judgement you bloody fools.
Scimi
Calm down brother. We told him it's a sin. That means
he must not repeat it. As already stated , disbelief in Allah is the greater sin than zina . Many Muslims also commit the same sin. Should we ask them to leave Islam ?
May be , we don't need converts but non muslims need Islam . We must not be rude to them.
Last edited by Muslim Woman; 06-09-2016 at 10:11 AM.
Well, in this kind of situations, I've always said that it's better to be a not-so-good Muslim than not a Muslim at all. That's just me though, I can't guarantee that you'll be recognized as and treated as a fellow Muslim by other Muslims.
A major issue that comes to mind, though, is that of marriage. If you intend to marry a Muslim woman, you'd need to commit to her and stop playboying around. Then it's no longer between you and God, then there's another person in the picture. Whether you can make such a commitment is something you would need to think long and hard about. As for any specific sexual preferences you might have, it's entirely legitimate to get married on the understanding that your wife will accommodate. Between husband and wife, pretty much everything is legitimate. Yet, you'd still need to commit to her exclusively, there's no way around that.
May Allah swt guide you. Better to die as believer than non believer. When one wants to accept Islam they must accept everything about it. I know many Muslims engage in haram some of them have knowledge of Islam some don't.
I understand it seems hard for u to control your desires, you must feel good girls wanting you and you being able to satisfy them and yourself but it's a major sin in Islam..I'm not saying accept Islam and the same day you should start doing everything it says, you should start with the basics but at least have the intention that youl stop committing fornication..knowing it's a major sin you still wanna continue with it?? You know how much Allah hates it? We are told not to even go near it let alone doing it that to with different women each time..don't you think your love should be for the one you marry?? Only she deserves to be loved by you? (Oh I forgot it's all about lust nowadays)
You said it few times that you had "practicing" Muslim gfs, we know Muslims do wrong and haram but you didn't have to give out all the info of how many you had and from which ethnicity. If the reason for you accepting Islam is that "practicing" Muslims did haram so it's acceptable in Islam so u should revert and carry on doing it is wrong on so many levels. Sighs. But then again revert and die as Muslim than non..you don't wanna leave the haram but in sha Allah when you revert and learn more about Islam it will make you leave all the haram, Allah swt forgives all sins.
I am surprised that no one mentioned that if one does a sin knowingly, with the idea they can repent later - this becomes a disingenuous repentance and is not accepted.
The problem, though, is that I don't think I would be a good Muslim. I have sex with a lot of different girls, and sometimes I even pay for it with prostitutes and film it even though I am good looking and can often get sex for free. I'm also a bit perverted sexually. I don't want to change that, it's part of who I am. I know that is not the way a Muslim is supposed to conduct himself.
You yourself have stated that you are "perverted sexually"...why would you want to continue making a mistakes when you know they're not right. Secondly, you said that the girls that you've slept with were "practicing muslims." I assure you a practicing Muslim girl would not date in the first place let alone have a boyfriend and sleep with guys.
You can become Muslim, but you have to learn to restrain yourself, not just sexually but beyond that with even simple desires like hunger and thirst. As you know it's ramadan, so this is a good time to train our bodies to learn how to restrain our lowest desires as well as learn empathy. When you become a Muslim you're accountable for facilitating others to sin, so if you meet a muslim girl that you like, you don't allow yourself or her to become friends. Out of respect for her you ask for her hand in marriage, you get married, and you live with your wife.
That being said, hang around and ask more about Islam because you still have a lot to learn about the mannerisms and characteristics of PRACTICING muslims. You can absolutely become Muslim now, but once you become Muslim your previous sins are erased so you don't want to ruin the rest of your journey with impure practices and unrestraint desires. You have to want to practice it correctly, not just be a Muslim by name.
I assure you a practicing Muslim girl would not date in the first place let alone have a boyfriend and sleep with guys.
A practising Muslim can make mistakes / sins / error of judgement etc.
Judging by this users post I would suggest he is a troll. I think people like him are too self absorbed to genuinely consider Islam to be honest with you.
If you believe Islam is the truth, then you would be a fool to not be Muslim.
That being said, muslims can be imperfect.
What you intend to keep doing (fornication) is a major sin, and if you are Muslim you will have to have the humility to admit that it is, even if you choose to engage in it.
The fact that you want to be Muslim, but are having a severe issue in giving up this promiscuous lifestyle might indicate that you are addicted to it for what could be a number of reasons.
Maybe talking to a therapist would be helpful.
Last edited by Aisha; 06-09-2016 at 08:57 PM.
Reason: Removed quoted post
Not being funny but I don't want Muslims like THAT - we got enough issues as it is without having some chump with a penchant for Muslim women wanting to be Muslim so he can sleep around... am i the only one who has clocked this troll or what?
This forum has a bunch of goody two shoes wannabe PC brown nosers ffs.
Muslims do not compromise on DEEN. GET THAT THRU YA HEADS.
Sorry, not everyone is perfect. I asked my question here because I would like help and advice on this issue so I thought this would be a good place to ask.
I have a big problem with liberalism and feminism in the West, and this is part of what has attracted me to Islam. I also think its the best guidelines with which to live your life. That is my reasoning for wanting to convert.
So I am asking if that is possible and OK with the hobbies I have.
Sorry that you take offense to my post, but I'm not trolling, just seeking some advice and help on this topic. Thank you.
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