Everyone who is young and single is so focused on getting married and some people end up in family feuds over the subject of finding a suitable partner.
I don't intend to discourage any two muslims who are "in love" from afar to not get married and it is completing ones faith and it is an important sunnah.
I'd like to bring to light a different perspective for those who are doing everything to get married, instead of staying single for awhile and waiting longer before tieing the knot. Perhaps their is a reason for why you are not getting married so quickly? Perhaps there is a hidden blessing that you are over looking.
Think about it....
1. Single means you can eat, sleep, study, work, go out to the park when ever you want.
2. Being single allows you the opportunities to earn your own living in order to travel to far off major booming economies such as Dubai or Qatar, and you can work how ever many hours, jobs as you want.
3. Being single means you can spend your last two dollars on a chocolate covered chocalate if you wish,without anyone standing over you forbidding you for any reason.
4. Being single allows you to choose how you want to live, go to the masjid at anytime you like, not being forbidden from doing so.
5. Being single means you have more time to wait for Allah to send you a good Muslim your way, by waiting, sometimes you actually get better end results in finding a suitable marriage partner.
6. Being single allows you time to explore your own personality, and to buid "you" before you try to build a relationship based on "us".
7. Staying single longer means you can jump at any opportunity that comes your way, and you can set your life up, buy a car, build a nice house, so you'll always have something to call your own in your own name no matter if you get married or not.
8. Delaying marriage means more time that you can spend with your mom while she is still alive, instead of having to deal with a needy spouse who always wants you at home cooking and cleaning.
9. Staying single a little longer will allow you the opportunities stay out with your best friends instead of having to always be at home having to deal with a grumpy nagging spouse.
10. Last but not least, staying single means more opportunities to seek knowledge and more time to build your Imaan up!
but you can do so many of those things whilst your married too...
9. Staying single a little longer will allow you the opportunities stay out with your best friends instead of having to always be at home having to deal with a grumpy nagging spouse.
that's a little insulting, no?
...desperate for husnul-khitaam...
please make dua that Allah grants me a good end (to my life). please make dua that Allah guides me.
1. Single means you can eat, sleep, study, work, go out to the park when ever you want.
Being married means you'll never be bored whilst doing any of the above
2. Being single allows you the opportunities to earn your own living in order to travel to far off major booming economies such as Dubai or Qatar, and you can work how ever many hours, jobs as you want.
What the...? Being married means you have your very own bodyguard....Mahram to go with also that us sisters wont really have to work, beat that!
3. Being single means you can spend your last two dollars on a chocolate covered chocalate if you wish,without anyone standing over you forbidding you for any reason.
Why would your spouse wanna do that?
Being married means you dont have to drool over them chocs,you'll have someody to buy them for you
I dont have time to read the rest but they're all silly, surely a pious husband/wife would support you in all of them things and would be a blessing rather than a burden, no?
1. Single means you can eat, sleep, study, work, go out to the park when ever you want.
if i cant eat/sleep/study or work afta marriage then i must be dead or somethin lol. and im sure my wife wud love to accompany me to the park
2. Being single allows you the opportunities to earn your own living in order to travel to far off major booming economies such as Dubai or Qatar, and you can work how ever many hours, jobs as you want.
whats the point of earning a living if you have no one to live with?
3. Being single means you can spend your last two dollars on a chocolate covered chocalate if you wish,without anyone standing over you forbidding you for any reason.
lol i need that restriction, trust me
4. Being single allows you to choose how you want to live, go to the masjid at anytime you like, not being forbidden from doing so.
i wouldnt marry someone who would prevent me from the masjid!!!!
5. Being single means you have more time to wait for Allah to send you a good Muslim your way, by waiting, sometimes you actually get better end results in finding a suitable marriage partner.
true but for those who find them quick, get married quick
6. Being single allows you time to explore your own personality, and to buid "you" before you try to build a relationship based on "us".
ive explored it enuff for one lifetime lol.
7. Staying single longer means you can jump at any opportunity that comes your way, and you can set your life up, buy a car, build a nice house, so you'll always have something to call your own in your own name no matter if you get married or not.
sounds a bit selfish, not me, definitly not me, i already gotta think bout family before all of those anywayz.
8. Delaying marriage means more time that you can spend with your mom while she is still alive, instead of having to deal with a needy spouse who always wants you at home cooking and cleaning.
lol thats just wrong, course mums gnna get priority always!!!!!
9. Staying single a little longer will allow you the opportunities stay out with your best friends instead of having to always be at home having to deal with a grumpy nagging spouse.
i dont think its good to always be with "friends" anyways, family first
10. Last but not least, staying single means more opportunities to seek knowledge and more time to build your Imaan up!
again a wifey can help with that.
hehe
Assalamu Alaikum broo i know it was just a joke, it was kinda funny
-
My tears testify that i have a heart
yet i feel me and shaytan never part
-
2. Being single allows you the opportunities to earn your own living in order to travel to far off major booming economies such as Dubai or Qatar, and you can work how ever many hours, jobs as you want.
For men maybe.although I'd LOVE that, I wouldn't be able to move to another country/find a job/work in a strange country(although I speak the language) all on my own, with no relatives or friends whatsoever! What better thana spouse to start ur life with in a new country?
format_quote Originally Posted by Najm
3. Being single means you can spend your last two dollars on a chocolate covered chocalate if you wish,without anyone standing over you forbidding you for any reason.
Sis Amatul Wadud, I love your reply!!
format_quote Originally Posted by Najm
5. Being single means you have more time to wait for Allah to send you a good Muslim your way, by waiting, sometimes you actually get better end results in finding a suitable marriage partner.
Could be true...the person u marry @ 18 might have the same interests as you at that age...but what if, when you're 25, you want something drastically different than what your spouse wants? (like...you want to travel to another country and live there for a while, and he/she wants to start a family):X
format_quote Originally Posted by Najm
6. Being single allows you time to explore your own personality, and to buid "you" before you try to build a relationship based on "us".
format_quote Originally Posted by Najm
7. Staying single longer means you can jump at any opportunity that comes your way, and you can set your life up, buy a car, build a nice house, so you'll always have something to call your own in your own name no matter if you get married or not.
I don't mind sharing.
format_quote Originally Posted by Najm
8. Delaying marriage means more time that you can spend with your mom while she is still alive, instead of having to deal with a needy spouse who always wants you at home cooking and cleaning.
lol. who says we don't do those things already? *alright..maybe not ME specifically..lol*
I remember this thread from the AlMaghrib forums! And I remember I didn't quite agree with it then. So I won't respond point by point because I'd be repeating some of the replies above.
My point is that the Messenger (salalahu 'alayhi wa sallam) told the youth that when they have the means, they should get married. And the wisdom behind that is profound because the benefits of getting married the earliest you are able to include (and are not limited to):
Safety. Allaah described the spouses in the Qur'an as libaas: garments. {They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them. al-Baqarah; 187}. And just like a garment protects the wearer from the cold and harmful environment, a spouse protects you from evil around you.
When you're young, you have higher desires and if these desires are not treated in the proper manner, it can lead to harmful consequences. There are only so many things one can do to supress them, but when that limit is reached, people can and do fall.
Companionship.
Easier to lower the gaze.
Provided you choose a righteous spouse, you'll have someone to help you increase in good.
You find tranquility in marriage, with your spouse. As well as love and mercy. {And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy.} ar-Rum; 21
If you've chosen a righteous spouse, peace in your home. {And Allah has made for you from your homes a place of rest} an-Nahl; 80
Children. Just like love of women has been made something desired by men, Allaah has also made love of offspring something desired. {Beautified for people is the love of that which they desire - of women and sons} ale-Imraan; 14
Increase in wealth. Getting married is a means to increase one's wealth. {If they should be poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty,} an-Noor; 32
Everyone who is young and single is so focused on getting married and some people end up in family feuds over the subject of finding a suitable partner.
I don't intend to discourage any two muslims who are "in love" from afar to not get married and it is completing ones faith and it is an important sunnah.
I'd like to bring to light a different perspective for those who are doing everything to get married, instead of staying single for awhile and waiting longer before tieing the knot. Perhaps their is a reason for why you are not getting married so quickly? Perhaps there is a hidden blessing that you are over looking.
1. Single means you can eat, sleep, study, work, go out to the park when ever you want.
Alone? that wud suck.
2. Being single allows you the opportunities to earn your own living in order to travel to far off major booming economies such as Dubai or Qatar, and you can work how ever many hours, jobs as you want.
It's also possible to find a like-minded person who can do it all wit u?
3. Being single means you can spend your last two dollars on a chocolate covered chocalate if you wish,without anyone standing over you forbidding you for any reason.
Err why would anyone forbid u, n wat gives anybody the right to forbid chocolate? It's halal!!
4. Being single allows you to choose how you want to live, go to the masjid at anytime you like, not being forbidden from doing so.
Wats wit all the forbidding this n that, why would anyone forbid anyone to go to the mosque, do people like that exist?..that's pretty sad.
5. Being single means you have more time to wait for Allah to send you a good Muslim your way, by waiting, sometimes you actually get better end results in finding a suitable marriage partner.
I see...lol
6. Being single allows you time to explore your own personality, and to buid "you" before you try to build a relationship based on "us".
Agreed..spot on!
7. Staying single longer means you can jump at any opportunity that comes your way, and you can set your life up, buy a car, build a nice house, so you'll always have something to call your own in your own name no matter if you get married or not.
Wad?..
8. Delaying marriage means more time that you can spend with your mom while she is still alive, instead of having to deal with a needy spouse who always wants you at home cooking and cleaning.
Agree about the Mom bit, but just to clarify cleaning is part of Imaan, so whoever cleans benefits himself, cooking is not such a big deal, u don't have to always cook. That mentality is a bit wrong.
9. Staying single a little longer will allow you the opportunities stay out with your best friends instead of having to always be at home having to deal with a grumpy nagging spouse.
Come again? Too much generalizations going on?
10. Last but not least, staying single means more opportunities to seek knowledge and more time to build your Imaan up!
True, I agree.
Learn Patience from Asiyah, Loyalty from Khadijah, Sincerity from Aisha and Steadfastness from Fatima.
The problem is not age, but it's mentality, the reason we need time to 'develop' our personality is because we are brought up in this way, fed enough rubbish to believe it, and are so weak that we cannot imagine being different from non-Muslims.
It's a psychological aspect in my view, did Ayesha need time to develop her identity, may Allah be pleased with her? The points brought up mainly are due to two faults:
1.Not being brought up properly.
2.Marriage being made difficult by the community.
1. When we are not brought up properly we think, for example, that we are not ready to get married until 20 or so, we are brought up to live depending on our parents until 16 or so, we are taught that we have to get a degree or have 20000 dollars before marriage etc.
Thus you find people saying stuff like:
3. Being single means you can spend your last two dollars on a chocolate covered chocalate if you wish,without anyone standing over you forbidding you for any reason.
Etc.
2.The difficulty of marriage is so obvious nowdays that even those people who want to get married to save themselves from the fitnah of naked women walking around cannot, and Almighty God's help is sought. Thus you find a claim which goes against the claim of a scholar:
10. Last but not least, staying single means more opportunities to seek knowledge and more time to build your Imaan up!
In a little booklet named Islamic Solutions for the Youth it is either shaykh Uthaymeen or Fawzan which says opposite to this! Moreover if marriage was made easy then the youth would benefit, any normal man with desire who has no wife finds it hard to walk the western streets without having to moving his head this and that way for the fear of loosing eeman.
Moreover I just remembered the Shahaba had not only one wife, like most of us, some of them had more than one, yet they were the best, the Prophet had more than one, sallaAllahu alayhi wa salam, yet he had all sort of jobs, what about Abu Bakr! 'Umar! SubhanAllah, and we have one wife and want to say ''My deen will suffer''. Something's wrong with us.
May Allah reward the sister for her intetions though
Br.al-Habeshi
Last edited by Umar001; 01-24-2009 at 07:18 PM.
The path is long but I hope we meet,
After the grave and the Day, in paradise in bliss upon a reclined seat.
A traveler traveling - travelled from shirk to tawheed,
If I'm remembered for anything - let it be the Mercy I seek.
I'm definitely in no rush of getting married.. I don't see how I can go to school and work full time and manage a family. Why would anyone want to put themselves in that position? I'd rather get married when I know I'm able to support my wife and kids comfortably and at the same time, be there for them (not just financially). I'd rather work hard while I'm young because I know I will have a harder time doing it when I'm older.
A lot of people have intentions of getting married young because if you get passed a certain age, its just 'weird'.. To me it seems that they are more worried about what other people might think or say about them. To the people who don't want to get married, you will eventually get lonely and depressed and you will later realize your friends will not always be there for you. Don't forget they have their own lives to live.
This is just based on my own opinion obviously. It has nothing to do with religion or sunnah.
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