I encountered a situation last weekend. I went to the halal shop and instead of the normal brother serving this time, it was a sister. She was arab speaking I think probably Lebanon origin. I have only been to the shop 2, 3 times, with my husband and I was shocked at the women who came in there I only saw this time. Arabic speakers, they were dressed very improperly. The counter girl must have been around 21, 22 years old and had a halter top!!! I was amazed, she said salam and I felt a frown on my face automatically. I am so ashamed now.
It;s ignorance, i never did this before, but I thought, man your language is arabic, I am even deprived of this, you can understand all the ahdeeth and quraan first hand, and yet you stand here like this???
to make her feel guilty I went into the shop again, without my family and bought a Quraan and some islamic CDs for my kids. This time I tried to smile.
I wanted to ask all the hijabi and niqabis how would you treat a non hijabi muslim woman who dresses indecently.
Do you also feel sour? I normally feel very open minded and try and treat them well, so tey can be attracted towards hijab, but I feel so guilty now, I dont know why I was feeling kinda biased.
I was wondering what the etiquettes were for encountering non hijabi sisters...
understanding Arabic and learning the deen are two different things.
what do you mean make her feel guilty
the exact way i would encounter/treat a non-hijaabi sister...it makes no difference to me...i don't see why it should
knowing Arabic or having arabic as your first language doesn't mean that you're anymore religious than anyone else, taking into considering the fact that a lot of arabs are non-Muslim.
errrr and i hate to say it, but your lil story makes no sense. Why would go to the masjid and not straight to the hotel? stopping over at the mosque whilst your mother isn't even there to check on you, simply makes no sense. and why would you even say that in arabic in front of a bunch of other Arabs as well? i mean if your so adamant on concealing yourself, you don't go around speaking that kind of rubbish in the same language as those around you...
that reason is like the tiniest of proportions of all the reasons some of us may have trouble marrying... oh and i hope you brothers are doing your fair share of lowering your gaze as well! i mean if you want a modest wife, you would only be trying just as hard to preserve your modesty as well. right?
Assalamoalaikum,
I understand what you are saying. i normally feel this way too. There is nothing wrong but a piece of cloth missing on the sister, maybe the dressing style is different too. And the fact is that it is not nice to see that sisters appear as objects. I just wanted to know how one can invite them, to wear the Hijab. because the niqab may be a disputed thing but the Hijab is a fard.
I think maybe its just like having abeard for brothers, maybe it's "not a big deal". Anyway Allah guide me in doing the best, ameen.
As for making her feel guilty, this is so wrong, but I went back in so she could see me again that I am wearing an Abaya, maybe that will make her think.. to wear it herself.
I cver myself for Allah not for people so it was wrong, but how can one tell a sister to try and cover up. I was young and I only covered my ehad with a scarf many years ago. I was in italy and walking when this motorbike just stopped behind me and the brother with a beard started syaing something in italian and I couldnt understand. he tried in english, " head covered is good, please cover all.." Then he drove off. Since then I never took the abaya off, Alhamdolillah. I couldnt just say that to someone, so i asked if there is another approach and what do hijabi isters feel/do when they see non covering sisters. Afterall it's bad isn't it?
alot of sisters who don't wear hijab secretly want to, it isn't that they aren't conscious that they are committing sins or that it doesn't eat away at their heart-- there are many reasons as to why not, perhaps all of them silly and ridiclous like not having courage to do it.. the best approach is the gentle approach not the forceful one IMHO... no I wouldn't treat a sister poorly because she is dressed one way or the other.. she is still a sister..
Text without context is pretext If your opponent is of choleric temperament, seek to irritate him
I wanted to ask all the hijabi and niqabis how would you treat a non hijabi muslim woman who dresses indecently.
Do you also feel sour? I normally feel very open minded and try and treat them well, so tey can be attracted towards hijab, but I feel so guilty now, I dont know why I was feeling kinda biased.
I was wondering what the etiquettes were for encountering non hijabi sisters...
JazakAllah
Treat non-hijabis the way you'd treat any other person, Muslim or non-Muslim. The only difference between a hijabi and a non-hijabi, as far as a another human being is concerned, is that the non-hijabi's sin is more obvious. Of course, the hijabi's other sins might be obvious too, but the non-hijabi's lack of hijab is more visible, thus more obvious.
Of course, if a non-hijabi treats you with disrespect, the rules change a bit. Nobody needs to tolerate disrespect from anybody else, whether hijabed or hijabless.
format_quote Originally Posted by aadil77
hearing crap like this gets me vexxed if it was ok I'd hunt them down and slaughter them both, thats if I'm able to. I don't want to boast but I'm sure any brother here would feel like that after hearing such filth in one of the holiest places on earth
I think you might want to calm down. Hearing it, no matter where you are, is not the same as seeing it being done; and, no matter where you are, you still need witnesses and all that jazz. So, relax, take a chill pill, breathe deeply, and don't speak so comfortably of killing people. It sounds scary and highly inappropriate.
format_quote Originally Posted by squiggle
yeah I know how you feel
I hate seeing Muslim women walking around not covering up and being a FITNA for the men. Then they moan when men look at them and call them pervs lol what's wrong with these women :enough!:
Also they moan they can't get married, which man is gonna marry a women who walks around displaying her beauty for all the men to gawp at,admire and size up. I don't think any man wants a women who walks down the road and all the men stare at her cause she ain't covered up.
The men that go after these type of women are just after a "bit of fun" and they normally attempt to use them for the purpose of fulfilling evil desires and have no intention of marrying her.
All they see her as, is a sexual object. I digressed into something else lol sorry me and my tangents
To the brothers who find the uncovered women to be a fitna: whatever happened to the concept of lowering your gaze? We have the responsibility to cover up (as do you men) for our own good. You have the concept of lowering your gaze (as do we women) for your own good. If you didn't gawk at it, it would be a whole lot less of a fitna. And there are men out there who see that kind of dressing (or undressing) and are completely disgusted, to the point where it is not a fitna for them at all. So, a large part of the problem, sorry to say it, is with you. She may be dressing like a sexual object, but you bear responsibility for seeing her that way. Control yourselves, stop giving women who dress that way the attention they might be seeking, and maybe...just maybe, they'll stop dressing like they just stepped out of the shower.
PS: In Muslim countries, where women cover up, such as the Middle East and the subcontinent, women do still get harassed, molested, and raped. It's not about the way a woman dresses and behaves. It's about the way some men think. Fix the thinking, the rest will follow.
Last edited by zanjabeela; 07-12-2009 at 08:45 PM.
Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. But at least the wub is back.
I wanted to ask all the hijabi and niqabis how would you treat a non hijabi muslim woman who dresses indecently.
Generally I do try to avoid talking to any girl that is not related to me, whether they have the Hijab or not. If I am in a situation where I have to work or talk to a girl, I would simply keep things formal. Be nice and kind, but never get too friendly or personal. I try not to judge a girl who dresses indecently and I always lower my gaze. I always try to treat all women equally and with respect, even if they do not offer me any respect at all (some girls are rather stuck up).
I was looking at myself talking to myself and I realized this conversation...I was having with myself looking at myself was a conversation with myself that I needed to have with myself.
First May Allah guide her Ameen
Now as to how to treat her there is only one thing u can do and that is advices her and the rest is on her so with this i wanted to post something i was reading for the sisters mashallah a good read May Allah increae us in imran and make our hearts firm in islam Ameen
Dear Muslim sister! Come towards the gates of Paradise with us! Fulfill your duties towards Allaah, put on your adornment - put on your hijaab, and race towards Jannah (Paradise) by doing all good actions.
This is a good question and there is a beautiful answer! Allaah has commanded us with every action that is good for us and prohibited us from performing every action that is bad for us. Allaah orders the Muslim woman to wear the hijaab when she steps out of the security of her home or when in the presence of strange men. So to wear the hijaab is a source of great good for you – the Muslim woman - for many reasons. Among them:
1.
You please Allaah. You are obeying the commands of your Lord when you wear the hijaab and you can expect great rewards in return.
2.
It is Allaah’s protection of your natural beauty. You are too precious to be "on display" for each man to see.
3.
It is Allaah’s preservation of your chastity.
4.
Allaah purifies your heart and mind through the hijaab.
5.
Allaah beautifies your inner and outer countenance with hijaab. Outwardly your hijaab reflects innocence, purity, modesty, shyness, serenity, contentment and obedience to your Lord. Inwardly you cultivate the same.
6.
Allaah defines your femininity through the hijaab. You are a woman who respects her womanhood. Allaah wants you to be respected by others, and for you to respect yourself.
7.
Allaah raises your dignity through the hijaab. When a strange man looks at you, he respects you because he sees that you respect yourself.
8.
Allaah protects your honour 100% through your hijaab. Men do not gaze at you in a sensual way, they do not approach you in a sensual way, and neither do they speak to you in a sensual way. Rather, a man holds you in high esteem and that is just by one glance at you!
9.
Allaah gives you nobility through the hijaab. You are noble not degraded because you covered not naked.
10.
Allaah demonstrates your equality as a Muslim woman through the hijaab. Your Lord bestows upon you equal worth as your male counterpart, and gives you a host of beautiful rights and liberties. You express your acceptance of these unique rights by putting on the hijaab.
11.
Allaah defines your role as a Muslim woman through the hijaab. You are a someone with important duties. You are a reflection of a woman of action not idle pursuits. You display your sense of direction and purpose through your hijaab. You are someone that people take seriously.
12.
Allaah expresses your independence through the hijaab. You are stating clearly that you are an obedient servant of the Greatest Master. You will obey no one else and follow no other way. You are not a slave to any man, nor a slave to any nation. You are free and independent from all man-made systems.
13.
Allaah gives you the freedom of movement and expression through the hijaab. You are able to move about and communicate without fear of harassment. Your hijaab gives you a unique confidence.
14.
Allaah wants others to treat you – a Muslim woman - with kindness. And the hijaab brings about the best treatment of men towards you.
15.
Allaah wants your beauty to be preserved and saved for just one man to enjoy – your husband.
16.
Allaah helps you to enjoy a successful marriage through wearing hijaab. Because you reserve your beauty for one man alone, your husband’s love for you increases, he cherishes you more, he respects you more and he honours you more. So your hijaab contributes to a successful and lasting marriage relationship.
17.
Allaah brings about peace and stability in the society through the hijaab! Yes this is true! Men do not cause corruption by forming illegal relationships because you - the Muslim woman - calm their passions. When a man looks at you, he feels at ease, not tempted to fornicate…
So a Muslim woman in hijaab is dignified, not dishonoured, noble, not degraded, liberated, not subjugated, purified, not sullied, independent, not a slave, protected, not exposed, respected, not laughed at, confident, not insecure, obedient, not a sinner, a guarded pearl, not a prostitute…
Dear Muslim sister! Come towards the gates of Paradise with us! Fulfill your duties towards Allaah, put on your adornment - put on your hijaab, and race towards Jannah (Paradise) by doing all good actions. You should agree by now that wearing hijaab is extremely beneficial – it must be - because Allaah only commands what is good…
…and believe me dear sister, it is good to obey the commands of your Lord…
"Their reward is with their Lord: Gardens of Eden underneath which rivers flow wherein they will dwell for ever; Allaah is pleased with them, and they are pleased with Him; this is (in store) for whoever fears his Lord." [Sooratul-Bayyinah 98:8]
Asalam wa alaykum
"The Human being is an enemy to what he is ignorant of"
Sometimes when i walk past a girl, i blatantly lower my gaze, as to show her im not looking at her, not to really make feel guilty, but maybe to show her a non verbal message
is this wrong?
There are lot of bros who would like to keep the beard, but something stops them,same as for a lot of sisters.
Sometimes when i walk past a girl, i blatantly lower my gaze, as to show her im not looking at her, not to really make feel guilty, but maybe to show her a non verbal message
is this wrong?
There are lot of bros who would like to keep the beard, but something stops them,same as for a lot of sisters.
Wearing for women hijab is compulsory, wearing beard for men is not compulsory, at least not stated in the Quran
Sometimes when i walk past a girl, i blatantly lower my gaze, as to show her im not looking at her, not to really make feel guilty, but maybe to show her a non verbal message
is this wrong?
There are lot of bros who would like to keep the beard, but something stops them,same as for a lot of sisters.
Brother, lowering the gaze is an order of the Qur'an and it has been to be done solely for the sake of Allah and not to make anyone feel anything at all.
Umar ibn al-Khattaab (RadhiAllahu Anhu) narrated that the Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) said: "Actions are by intention, and every person will receive what he intended. So whoever intended to migrate for the sake of Allaah and His Messenger, then his migration will be for Allaah and His Messenger. And whoever intended to migrate for the sake of some worldy benefit or in order to marry a woman, then his migration will be for that which he migrated."
[reported by Saheeh al-Bukhari (v.1 no.1) and Saheeh Muslim (v.3 no.4692) and also Sunan Abu Dawood]
So whatever you do, do it only and only to gain Allah's pleasure. Doing a righteous act with an intention other than pleasing Allah is considered minor SHIRK. Protect yourself from the traps of shaytaan. Keep reciting this dua for clean intentions :
"Allahumma inni aoodhu bika an ushrika bika wa ana a'lam wa'staghfiruka lima laa a'lam"
O Allah, I seek refuge with You from knowingly associating anything with You and I seek Your forgiveness for that which I am unaware.
If Allah helps you, none can overcome you; and if He forsakes you, who is there after Him that can help you? And in Allah (Alone) let believers put their trust.
Surah Ale Imran : 160
It was narrated that Anas ibn Maalik (may Allaah be pleased with him) said:
The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allaah be upon him) climbed up Uhud, accompanied by Abu Bakr, ‘Umar and ‘Uthmaan, and the mountain shook with them. He struck it with his foot and said: “Stand firm, O Uhud, for there is no one on you but a Prophet or a Siddeeq or two martyrs.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari (3483)
Allah (Subhaanahu Wa Taala) does not inspire seeking forgiveness in a slave whom he wishes to punish.
I wanted to ask all the hijabi and niqabis how would you treat a non hijabi muslim woman who dresses indecently.
Honestly, I would treat her the same as a hijabi, mostly due to the fact that I don't no what's in her heart. She may not have been brought up in an ideal islamic way, I mean im still getting used to wearing hijab, but even when I wasn't wearing one no one knew my intentions, but Allah. and unfortunatly some sisters who do cover up arn't so holy as they seem.
So sis I wouln't judge a sis like that, and i wud feel sort of uncomfertable for making her feel bad
Arabic speakers, they were dressed very improperly. The counter girl must have been around 21, 22 years old and had a halter top!!! I was amazed, she said salam and I felt a frown on my face automatically. I am so ashamed now.
Why are u ashamed? If they are Muslims, they are the ones who should feel ashamed to be dressed like that.
"I told my mother I am going to the Masjid to pray Fajr, but I've called my boyfriend up and he is coming to meet me in a hotel. We are going to have breakfast and then...." (I'd rather not finish this sentence).
SubhanAllah. In the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alayhi Wa Aalihi Wa Sallam's masjid. Enough said.
Only if you recorded her and gave it to the religious police lol
I'd treat them with respect as I would a hijabi. I'm not here to judge. Everyone has their own path; some may take longer to make it to that transition to wearing hijab. You need full conviction to do it, right?
‘Say: If the ocean were ink wherewith to write out the words of my Lord, sooner would the ocean be exhausted, even if We added another ocean like it.’~Al Qu'raan (18:109)
If I saw a Muslim woman dressed in the clothing they are "supposed" to wear in Islam, I wouldn't say anything, except probably take a second look cause I have never seen one wearing one before, although I'm pretty sure it's just cloth covering the skin, nothing special. I mean a lot of people would stare at Amish, I don't cause I live near them and have been living with them all my life. I guess you just grow into it.
i see some women leave there hair in front showing
is that allowed ? (i think its not)
is there any hadith can give the sisters or point out where its writen for them to cover head
without any hair been seen
i know few sisters who let a few hair showing in from (for style i guess)
Dear scholars, As-Salamu `alaykum. I have been wearing hijab for five years. It was my choice, but my confidence and self esteem have been entirely shattered because of it. I am enraged at the fact that the scholars (mainly men) have been threatening Muslim women into believing that Allah has ordered them to cover their hair. The truth is that these scholars (mostly men) have decided that women must cover their hair in order to divert the desires of men, labeling such a ruling as a commandment of Allah. In Qur'anic verses Allah specifically tells women to cover their bosoms. Did Allah forget to mention hair? Jazakum Allah khayran
Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
Dear sister, we commend your pursuit of knowledge and your eagerness to seek what is lawful and avoid what is not. We earnestly implore Allah to bless your efforts in this honorable way.
It must be well-known that the primary purpose of hijab, or the proper Islamic dress code, is to safeguard the modesty, dignity and honor of men and women.
Allah, the Creator of humans, knows our nature better than ourselves, and thus He has prescribed appropriate rules of behavior and appearance to be observed when men and women interact with one another. These rules of interaction also include a prescription for modest dressing, which applies to men as well as women. Almighty Allah says, "Say to the believing men to lower their gazes and guard their chastity…” (An-Nur: 30) He also says: “And tell the believing women to lower their eyes, and guard their modesty, and that they display not their ornaments except what appears of them.” (An-Nur: 31)
In his response to the question in point, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:
You are commended for your desire to set the matter straight on the matter of hijab. You are also to be commended for your attempt to find the required information through the most authentic sources in Islam, namely the Qur’an and the Sunnah.
Having said this, however, I must advise you to approach these sources by using the proper methodology;. Since the Qur’an was revealed in the Arabic language, we must understand its meanings by reference to the usage and conventions of that language. To use a translation, however accurate it may be, often does not properly convey the full nuances of the revealed Word.
Let us now turn to the specific verse on hijab in the Qur’an: “And tell the believing women to lower their eyes, and guard their modesty, and that they display not their ornaments except what appears of them. And that they draw their scarves (khumurihinna) over their bosoms…” (An-Nur: 31)
The word used in this context is khumur which has been variously translated as veils or scarves; the latter is more precise for it is the plural of khimar, which has been defined as “a woman’s head covering; a piece of cloth with which a woman covers her head.” (See Ibn Manzur, Lisan al-`Arab.) Imam Raghib al-Isfahani in his famous work, Mufradat alfadh al-Qur’an defines the terms by saying, “The root meaning of the word is to cover, and the khimar, therefore, is the cover or veil, but it has become synonymous with veil with which a woman covers her head (i.e., headscarf); the plural of the word is khumur (as used in the Qur’an: An-Nur: 31).” Because, according to the Arabic usage, covering the head is the most important function of khimar, no scholar in the past that we know of has ever disputed the fact that women are commanded by Allah to cover their heads; they only argued whether the face and hands are also included in the above order. The majority of scholars are of the opinion that they are allowed to uncover their faces and hands.
Furthermore, one of the basic principles of the Qur’anic exegesis is that we must seek to understand the Qur’anic verses as they were originally revealed to, received, understood, and applied by the Companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), both men and women. We have incontrovertible evidence in the sources to suggest that it is in the above sense, and in the above sense alone, that they related to, and applied the above verse. We read the report of `A’ishah, the beloved wife of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) who said: “By Allah, I never saw more excellent women than those of the Ansar in their zeal to believe and act according to the Revelation. When Allah revealed the verse, “and let them draw their veils over their bosoms”, their men rushed to their homes in order to recite the same to their wives, daughters and sisters and relatives. No sooner they heard the verse, everyone of their women without exception rushed to cut a piece of their long gowns and covered themselves with it, and thus they stood behind the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) with their heads covered as if they had crows sitting on them (because of the color of their head-scarves)!” (See Tafsir works such as those of Ibn Jarir, al-Qurtubi and Ibn Kathir, etc.)
In light of the above, it is easy to conclude that covering the head (and not the face and hands) is a stated requirement of the proper Islamic attire for Muslim women. It is clearly not one of those scholarly interpretations which one may choose to accept or ignore but a clear commandment of Allah stated in the Qur’an. May Allah guard us all against the evil inclinations of our souls and help us to remain steadfast on the truth. Amen.
Excerpted, with slight modifications, from: www.islam.ca
well in the palestinian society in my uni,there is this palestinian girl,very pretty MashaAllah,but the way she dresses makes me blush, her neck line is so low and her skirts so short! and ofcourse all the boys try to flirt with her, muslim boys too! and one time something happend and you know how Arabs say 'Ya Allah'! to vent their frustration at something,and when she said this,i felt so strange,and i thought how can you say Allah's name dressed like that,you dont deserve to say Allahs name!
Now i feel so i ashamed to think that i thought that a creation of Allah is not worthy of his mercy.......Maybe Allah loved her more than me for something i dont know about....Maybe she is better than me in the sight of Allah for something.
So ive learnt,were ALL Allah's creation and we should never look down upon another,whom we think is less than us in deen, as all knowledge rests with Allah.
My heart, so precious,
I won't trade for a hundred thousand souls.
Your one smile takes it for free.Rumi
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How would you treat a non hijabi? (OP)
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to wear it herself.
lol
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