I've been going through a lot of issues lately and I just need a place to vent I suppose. I may or may not be around much after this post even; I just asked Sheikh Google where I could find a forum for converts to Islam and, after sorting through the shia links, stumbled upon this one.
At any rate, like I stated above, I've been going through lots of issues. Not with my family really. Although there have been some issues since I converted, they have generally been accepting of me, alhamdulillah. I had some friends abandon me, but I guess I used my shahadah as the furqan to determine who my true friends really were.
My issues are with the community at large. I love Islam but have very little patience with muslims. I had the normal issues once I converted (i.e. the jamaat trying to turn me into an Arab or Pakistani and when I didn't, leaving me to teach myself the deen) but I was able to get through that, alhamdulillah.
The most insulted and embarrassed I have even been in my life has been now that I am trying to get married. It is absolutely unbelievable the things I have to deal with. I mean, it took some time but the uncles finally think its ok to pray next to me but astaughfirullah if I ask about marrying their daughters.
I have even had my Islam questioned, like I am not a real muslim because I am white.
There are some sisters that are interested in me but it never works out due to the above or because my knowledge of the deen isn't as strong as they'd like (sorry, if I had a teacher I wouldn't be in this problem).
I don't mean to sound unappreciative of or like I do not acknowledge the mercy of Allah but a lot of this is just ridiculous. Islam in books is mashaAllah. Islam in the masaajid is aoudhibillah.
Unfortunately, I have been told before that my dua is not accepted because it isn't in Arabic. This is the crap I have to deal with and it honestly drives me away from muslims and the Arabic language
I'm sorry to have frustrated you brother. Had I known that I wouldn't have mentioned Arabic at all. The criteria for your duaa being accepted is not whether it is said in Arabic or English or Chinese, but its whether it was said with sincerity and humility. I don't know which community or city u live in that people are telling u such ridiculous things, but I really admire your patience with them and your sincerity and loyalty to Allaah still. He is the Most appreciative of every, even the smallest difficulty and sacrifice you have gone through for His sake and He will never ever let a true believer like you down.
I have only made it about 20 minutes into the first video... there seems to be an issue and it craps out when I stream it. I download it though and will see if that helps.
hmm I hope it gets fixed quickly.
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Well first of brother Sabr(patience) is the key for heaven. Imagine people 1500 years ago who died as non Muslims how long would they have been tortured? There's no end to the grave punishment until the day of judgement who only Allah knows when will occur. Without patience you can't do anything here in this world of tests. Here are a list of things you can't do without patience: Cant wait for day of judgement that you get all rushed up and forget what to do to get into heaven. Like this more things that you cannot do.
Be patience as the Muslims around you are excited that they have a new companion and just tell them to please stop rushing me ,it takes a while to understand the principles of Isl,the concept of Islam and the only book of Islam The Quran.My recommendation to you is while you are learning to read the Quran read the bible(the Muslim one) as you can find it in English versions or find an online software that can translate the Quran in English like Quran explorer.
Unfortunately, I have been told before that my dua is not accepted because it
isn't in Arabic. This is the crap I have to deal with and it honestly drives me
away from muslims and the Arabic language.
assalmo alaikom ( peace be upon you )
Please remember whose words matter;
And when My servants question thee concerning Me, then surely I am nigh. I
answer the prayer of the suppliant when he crieth unto Me. So let them hear
My call and let them trust in Me, in order that they may be led aright.[Baqara:186]
The shaadah can also be said like this " I testify that there is no god but Allah he is one and has no partner and I also testify Muhammad was his servant and messanger.
Note:Its servant first then messanger.
Are you talking about the Shaadah? Which dua if not?
I'm sorry to have frustrated you brother. Had I known that I wouldn't have mentioned Arabic at all. The criteria for your duaa being accepted is not whether it is said in Arabic or English or Chinese, but its whether it was said with sincerity and humility. I don't know which community or city u live in that people are telling u such ridiculous things, but I really admire your patience with them and your sincerity and loyalty to Allaah still. He is the Most appreciative of every, even the smallest difficulty and sacrifice you have gone through for His sake and He will never ever let a true believer like you down.
hmm I hope it gets fixed quickly.
Its not your fault. I know you only mean good, things just build up and get blown way out of proportion.
format_quote Originally Posted by Yanal
Well first of brother Sabr(patience) is the key for heaven. Imagine people 1500 years ago who died as non Muslims how long would they have been tortured? There's no end to the grave punishment until the day of judgement who only Allah knows when will occur. Without patience you can't do anything here in this world of tests. Here are a list of things you can't do without patience: Cant wait for day of judgement that you get all rushed up and forget what to do to get into heaven. Like this more things that you cannot do.
Be patience as the Muslims around you are excited that they have a new companion and just tell them to please stop rushing me ,it takes a while to understand the principles of Isl,the concept of Islam and the only book of Islam The Quran.My recommendation to you is while you are learning to read the Quran read the bible(the Muslim one) as you can find it in English versions or find an online software that can translate the Quran in English like Quran explorer.
I have been muslim for a few years and have read a couple different translations of the Quran. I know how to read Arabic script (unfortunately, had to teach myself). I know the Bible far better than the Quran and I want this to change.
The problem with my community isn't really that they tell me all this garbage (although, some): that comes from the online shuyookh-ul-islam. My community just doesn't acknowledge me; won't even really respond to salams (even after I've been praying there for over 2 years).
Well, I am being dishonest I suppose. When there is an interfaith, they're quick to ask the white brother (don't remember my name) to speak.
The most insulted and embarrassed I have even been in my life has been now that I am trying to get married. It is absolutely unbelievable the things I have to deal with. I mean, it took some time but the uncles finally think its ok to pray next to me but astaughfirullah if I ask about marrying their daughters..
.This is just so typical of all races and ethnicities, muslims will claim to all be one brotherhood, and act all chummy, but if u dare even think about asking for their daughters, they will turn on you like a bloodthirsty animal, all chumminess forgotten. ....so **** hypocritical
format_quote Originally Posted by convert
I have even had my Islam questioned, like I am not a real muslim because I am white.
..
dont worry this is so common, and usually believed by uneducated poeople, who cant believe that anybody other than their own ethnicity, esp black or white, are also created by Allah and have a duty to worship him and that Allah loves his creation equally.
My parents, unfortunately, hold this view strongly.Its quite hilarious actually, as my mum thinks all non asian converts are really undercover spies for their governments, plotting to to bring down muslims, by faking to be them.
Her favourite target is yvonne ridley.I think she just doesnt like her style of hijaab.
format_quote Originally Posted by convert
There are some sisters that are interested in me but it never works out due to the above or because my knowledge of the deen isn't as strong as they'd like (sorry, if I had a teacher I wouldn't be in this problem)...
That is simply ridiculous.you should ask them how stong THEIR knowledge is!
format_quote Originally Posted by convert
I had one guy honestly tell me that loving Arabs and recognizing them as this noble master race was part of fitrah. .
ah standard my brother, I had one tell me in so many words how lucky i was to be even sitting next to him (this was a phd student btw!).You dont want to hear my response..it has alot of stars in it
format_quote Originally Posted by convert
The thing about convert sisters is that they are the ones who don't want me because of my knowledge. They are hard set on getting an Arab guy to teach them the deen, nothing else will do.
format_quote Originally Posted by aadil77
Don't mind them brother, some arabs behave this way with all non-arabs. The arabs I saw at Dubai airport would look at me like sh*t, so don't worry about them they aint superior in any way, I'd like to see the behave that way is this country, they'd get battered.
An arab guy....oh my lord....the whole superiority thing again! , How the heck are arabs any better than anyone else.but like i said, this brother i mentioned would constantly (although making sure it was disguised as a joke), would insult pakistanis, knowing that i am pakistani and it will offend me. and he would laugh heartily at his own jokes.I told him he was getting a bit round and needed to loose the arab fat..that shut him up....but lemme tell u , god help u if u ever poke at arab pride....they get vicious man,.....blimey.
and finally i am so sorry that some muslims are so crap to reverts, their ignorant, idiotic discrminations, and prejudices, embarass me. , but we are not all like that.I admire reverts more than born muslims!
I am also sorry u cannot find anyone to teach you and that everyobe u meet has the ulterior motive of trying to make u follow their way of doing things.
but i admire your headstrong will and common sense of doing ur own research and May Allah bless u for all ur amazing efforts to learn about and follow the deen.
You are an inspiration to us all , and in my Duas!
My heart, so precious,
I won't trade for a hundred thousand souls.
Your one smile takes it for free.Rumi
there is no such thing as punishment in the grave Yanal , read the qur'an well and you'll know why.
brother convert, you needn't say it in Arabic, the earlier scholars for example allowed reading the qur'an as well as praying in Farsi for the newly converted Persians, and so on.
in fact you should never pray in a language you don't know, it is much like the pagan practice of 'chanting', rather prayer is meant to be for God. His wisdom and knowledge encompass all-he's not going to not understand~!-, so there is no good reason for chanting away when you could actually be really praying as should be done.
it is disputed, that is all I'll say, because a couple of sects believe in it does not make it happen IMO but since it is a matter of dispute you can believe it or leave it.
the verses alleged for supporting it are not explicit, nor are the verses used to discount it.
the ahadeeth used to support it are considered incorrect ahadeeth by the others, so it is not 'proven', it is not a very important matter of Aqeeda, rather it is up to the person to decide according to his own what group is more correct, presenting it as proven without doubt is not correct at all.
It was my understanding that very few groups denied punishment of the grave - some mutazilites, some shia and khawarij - and that it is the position of ahl al sunnah wa jamaah that it does exisit.
Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyya (ra) states in his book "The Soul":
This (punishment of the grave) is a well accepted fact among the Ahl al-Sunnah wa al-Jama'ah. al-Marwazi relates from Imam Ahmad (ra) that only a severely deviated person who also deviates others denies the punishment of the grave ( Kitab al-Ruh).
Imam al-Tahawi (ra) states in his al-Aqida al-Tahawiyya:
We believe in the punishment of the grave for those who deserve it, and in the questioning in the grave by Munkar and Nakir about one's Lords, one's religion and one's Prophet, as has come down in the narrations from the Messenger of Allah (saws) and his Companions (ra) (P. 14).
Imam al Tahawi's aqida is the aqida of ahl al Sunnah wa'a jamaah, aka sunni muslims. That's not a "couple of sects," that's the majority of muslims.
For the brother who's the OP - is it possible for you to move? It sounds like your community bites, to put it mildly. Moving is hard, especially in this economy, but if it will help you to improve your religion, then it's totally worth it. I am unsure as to your location, but in general, if you move to a city with a larger muslim population, there will be a better chance that you'll find more open and accepting people.
Here in the twin cities, minnesota, I'm not a terribly big fan of the community, but mashaAllah it's accepting of converts. I know an american convert brother who married a somali sister, and we have a large african american 1st and second generation convert community here as well.
LOL. I'm no scholar and have only taken a single class on aqida tahawiyya, plus my teacher impressed in us the importance of not debating these issues...but...simply stating what a major sunni text says on the issue isn't really debating, I hope
For the brother who's the OP - is it possible for you to move? It sounds like your community bites, to put it mildly. Moving is hard, especially in this economy, but if it will help you to improve your religion, then it's totally worth it. I am unsure as to your location, but in general, if you move to a city with a larger muslim population, there will be a better chance that you'll find more open and accepting people.
Here in the twin cities, minnesota, I'm not a terribly big fan of the community, but mashaAllah it's accepting of converts. I know an american convert brother who married a somali sister, and we have a large african american 1st and second generation convert community here as well.
Its not really an option. I have decided to leave the country to after I get $25-30000 saved up from working (approx 8-10 months time inshaAllah) and am staying in a place where I don't pay hardly anything for rent.
The sad thing is, I live in a city with a huge muslim population (one of the top 3 in the US). I have thought about moving closer to another masjid but I hear its generally the same for converts everywhere.
I was introduced to the special Somali marriage fiqh already, they were the rudest people to me, astaghfirullah.
Have you gone to all the masjids in the city? We have a masjid about 2 miles from our house, but I rarely go there - the sisters sit around speaking to each other in arabic and urdu, and rarely include me in conversation.
Instead, I take the bus all the way across town to a former NOI temple, now sunni muslim masjid. I've never felt so welcome anywhere in my entire religious life - they have greeters at the door specifically to say assalamu alaikum to everyone who enters the musula
brother convert, where do you plan to go at that if you don't mind?
sister Janaan, the aqeedah of altahawy is the aqeeda of altahawy, meaning it is his interpretation, since he's neither God or the prophet that makes his words as 'strong' as anyone else's.
this is why I stressed:making the view of a few sects as proven without doubt is not the correct way to go about it, It doesn't matter how many follow it blindly.
another thing, many scholars usually say that this matter is agreed upon and whatnot, while it reality it ISN'T. this is a habit many appear to have, from reading their books alone, you would think they were the only true muslims, and how could anyone say to the contrary etc etc, don't be fooled by this, rather the daleel-evidence- is all that matters, and there's 'equally contradicting' evidence in this issue, it is up to you to believe in it or not.
this is getting somewhat off topic though.
Have you gone to all the masjids in the city? We have a masjid about 2 miles from our house, but I rarely go there - the sisters sit around speaking to each other in arabic and urdu, and rarely include me in conversation.
Instead, I take the bus all the way across town to a former NOI temple, now sunni muslim masjid. I've never felt so welcome anywhere in my entire religious life - they have greeters at the door specifically to say assalamu alaikum to everyone who enters the musula
Well, there is only 1 masjid in my city (many in the metropolitan area). The masjid in the next town is about 20 mins away but they are being taken over by the Karachi Cool Kids Club and I don't speak Urdu.
With regards to former NOI masaajid: I work in the city proper and went to a former NOI masjid for jumaa a couple times. The brothers there are very friendly but I couldn't handle the amount of praise, kissing up they do to Barack Obama and I would consistently hear things like: "Well, not to disrespect any other races here [all the while looking at me and my Paki buddy from college], but for the Black man..."
The only masjid that I have ever felt comfortable in was Masjid ul-Haqq one time when I visited some people in Baltimore. Inner city, hardcore salafi, but the brothers there are very mashaAllah.
brother convert, where do you plan to go at that if you don't mind?
If I do not know Arabic when I go, then I will study in Sana'a until I am proficient, inshaAllah. I still have a ways to go with hifz (I only have around 1 juz) but I would like to try for Al Iman.
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.This is just so typical of all races and ethnicities, muslims will claim to all be one brotherhood, and act all chummy, but if u dare even think about asking for their daughters, they will turn on you like a bloodthirsty animal, all chumminess forgotten. ....so **** hypocritical
, but we are not all like that.I admire reverts more than born muslims!
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