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    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

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    When we hear that someone has entered Islam, we often ask .How did you accept Islam? . We also say Al hamdulilah (All praises are due to Allah alone) when someone says they have reverted to Islam, Right? These remarks show that we are heartened to see someone accepting the Truth!


    Life is not easy for any believer. Life is a test!, a Jihad (struggle), for every believer whether you are a "born" Muslims or reverts to Islam.

    As for reverts to Islam they undergo a great struggle. The moment they declare their faith (Islam), most of them lose their loved and dear ones. Their old friends refuse to accept their new lifestyle and new faith. Some of them tend to lose their family who are unable to digest the fact that they have embraced Islam. Whenever I hear a revert saying, "I love my parents so much… my family showered and lavished me with affection until I embraced Islam. My family’s attitude towards me is causing me much pain that sometimes I even think of leaving Islam, then Allah would shower His mercy on me that I would be reminded that this is a test and this World is just a temporary abode... and I would say 'I should not fail this test and Allah, The Most Merciful will shower His mercy and blessing on me and my family...'" The pain which, reverts to Islam undergo is something which cannot be felt unless we are in their shoes.


    During this time it our duty as brothers and sisters in Islam to lush them with friendship, brotherhood, love, kindness, affection, etc. To the contrary we find some of our brothers and sisters in Islam (who are born into a Muslim family) cause our new brothers and sisters much ache in their heart, by being prejudiced, intolerant and proud.


    I intended to write this essay after hearing about the treatment of our revert brothers and sisters in Islam by some of the "born" Muslims. I feel outraged to the core when I hear the spiteful attitude of these Muslims towards reverts to Islam. The new Muslims feel disheartened when they face this kind of behaviour.


    I wonder how someone can neglect the brothers or sisters who reverted and consider them inferior.

    Prophet [Salla Allaahu .alaihi wa sallam (May Allah peace and blessing be upon him)]
    observed: Are you not aware of the fact that Islam wipes out all the previous (misdeeds)? Verily migration wipes out all the previous (misdeeds), and verily the pilgrimage wipes out all the (previous) misdeeds. [Collected by Muslim: Book 001, Number 0220]


    I have heard and seen so many Muslims who are born into a Muslim family and raised as a Muslim collecting revert stories. When asked, "Why are you collecting these stories?" They would either reply, "We are curious to know how they found the truth and got the guidance?" and I have heard them saying, "Their reversion stories are truly inspirational and it helps us to boost our Iman (faith)..." The stories of reverts are published in Islamic magazines, Islamic newspapers, Islamic websites and sometimes a book is made out of these stories.

    Why?
    Because we know these brothers and sisters were not raised in a Muslim family and many would not have had met many Muslims before they reverted, yet they were still able to find the Truth and Guidance. This stirs curiosity in the minds of a raised Muslim or anyone, be it Muslim or non- Muslim, who is immersed and attracted to the "striking" lifestyle of the West. The influence of the west is so great on these Muslim that they tend to lose Islam. People become curious to know the reason why a person from the a non Islamic world, who was living in this "attractive" life of "freedom", suddenly is ready to forgo all his/her liberty and enter a religion which is considered to be irrational, extreme and oppressive. Thus, these revert stories (which are true life stories) act as a food to feed the curious mind.

    ---

    Nobody is infallible except Allah (swt) and everybody would have committed some sins or the other knowingly or unknowingly in their lifetime. When Allah is ready to forgive, who are we judge anyone??


    Mariam* 27 from Germany said, “ Seriously, I don't want to go to the Masjid. I find some Muslims are so intolerant towards us (reverts)..." She added, “I find them to be mean and spiteful. They are being so judgmental for the errors which I committed before I completely entered Islam...”


    A renowned scholar, Sheikh Muhammad al-Jibaly said, “It is only to Allah to give final judgment in regard to any person. Anyone who takes it upon himself to do so would be overstepping his human boundaries, and may deserve Allah's punishment.”


    The Prophet (saws) told that once a self-righteous man saw a sinner, he said: "By Allah, Allah will never forgive him. Allah then said, "Who are you who should dictate to Me what to do? Indeed, I have forgiven so-and so (the sinner), and demolished your deeds. "[Sahih Muslim no. 2621]

    He (sheikh) further added: Righteous people are told to be merciful towards those who committed mistakes, even if their mistakes harmed them personally. During the fitnah of accusing ‘Aaishah (ra) with zinaa, one of those who transmitted the falsehood was a poor relative of Abu Bakr (ra) that Abu Bakr used to give sadaqah. When Allah declared ‘Aishah's (ra) innocence in His Book, Abu Bakr made an oath that he will never give any more help to that relative. He showed us a daleel (proof) from the Qur’an:

    "Let not those of you with virtue and wealth swear not to give aid to the relatives, the needy, and the emigrants for Allah’s cause. Rather, let them pardon and overlook. Would you not like that Allah should forgive you? And Allah is Forgiving and Merciful.." [Soorat an-Noor 22]


    As a Muslim, I love all my brothers and sister for the sake of Allah and it causes great pain to hear our brothers and sisters describing their experience as a Muslim after their reversion. Many reverts feel excluded and hurt by this kind of treatment.


    One sister said, “I just don't feel lonely but excluded, when I am among Muslims. I would be sitting for hours listening to relatives talk in Urdu. They know I don't understand but still they continue to do that.”


    I remember showing a sister an essay. It was an essay for the youth, which tells us that Allah is the Wali (Protector and Friend) to the believers. This essay was actually meant for the youth but this sister (revert) who is in her late thirties told me that this essay made her feel good Alhamdulilah! Why? Because she felt so lonely and barred after reverting and this essay made her realize that she should not accept anyone to be her friend and she is heartened to know that Allah is her Friend.


    A brother who had accepted Islam few years’ back said, "I faced a lot of racism in Islam..." I wondered why he said that and then realized he said that because unfortunately the Muslims treated him that way. Then it was explained to him, "One cannot judge Islam based on Muslim's attitude. Because it looks like Muslims haven't submitted completely to the faith. We pick and choose what is convenient for us to follow and leave which is not convenient for us and our culture."


    When Sr. Fathima* 42 from the USA was asked to describe the experience of her first
    Ramadan, she said, "My first Ramadan was one of my most spiritual.... and was completed in the near total absence of Muslims. I hate to tell the story because I fear it sounds like bragging for having overcome some hardships, but I think it’s a sad commentary on where our community stands that the most spiritual Ramadan I had was done pretty much alone."

    Sr. Lamina*, 26 from Chennai, a strong and bold new Muslimah says, "It is really sad to note that some Muslims are behaving like creeps. I started acquiring Islamic knowledge from the time I declared my faith. I witness so many unislamic cultural acts carried on by Muslim in the name of Islam. They tell me what I am doing is wrong and they know better because they are born Muslims. Just because I am new Muslim I have no right to voice the evils happening in the society in the name of Islam? She further ad," Didn’t the prophet say that everybody is born in state of fitrah (natural) and everybody are Muslims when they are born and it is only the way they are raised which makes him a person of another faith? ...Doesn't Islam insist on humility? "


    Do these Muslims (who calls themselves born Muslims) know that almost all the Sahabah were reverts? Are they better than the Sahabah (reverts) in understanding and interpreting Islam (Qu’ran and Sunnah)? It is such a pitiful situation that some of these "born" Muslims are corrupting Islam with their shameful and horrible attitude, which has no place in Islam.


    This kind of behaviour made many Muslims say "Alhamdulilah! We found Islam before we met any Muslim."


    But I would say it is heartening to see there are still many brothers and sisters in Islam who are conscious of Allah. They are like a source of warmth and haven for our new brothers and sister in Islam. They are ready to shower them with love, kindness, encouragement and brotherhood!


    Islam is a religion of peace, tolerance and harmony but we see that this is lacking among us. It's so unfortunate that many reverts to Islam tend to leave Islam! Maybe if the community was more welcoming and supportive reverts to Islam would find it easier to stay on the straight path (Islam). These ugly stances by ignorant Muslims should be rejected and amended. Let us be conscious of behaviour towards anyone be it new Muslim, non-Muslim, children or servant. We will meet our Lord soon and let us strive to amend our ways before we meet our Lord.

    Source
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd



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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd




    may Allah makes lives easy for them and gives them rewards in this world and the hereafter .
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Christ will never be proud to reject to be a slave to God .....holy Quran, chapter Women , 4: 172

    recitation:http://quran.jalisi.com

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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    I, myself, am a revert. Every now and then, I meet other reverts and we share our experiences. Being neither here nor there, more or less, sums up the situation. We are no longer part of our original community of non-Muslims, and we are also not part of the Muslim community. The majority of the Muslims where I live are Malays and most of them expect me to become a Malay like them. Which is something impossible. Also something I have no desire whatsoever to do. Not that I have anything against the Malays. It's just that I want to be a Muslim not a Malay.

    So, what to do?

    Only one logical thing to do. We reverts will just have to help ourselves. That's all. No born Muslim, however well-meaning, can understand the situation of a revert as well as another revert.
    3 | Likes glo, Naeema, Signor liked this post
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd






    Faith is believing what you cannot see.
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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd



    Quote Originally Posted by Muslim Woman View Post
    may Allah makes lives easy for them and gives them rewards in this world and the hereafter .
    Ameen.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ali Mujahidin View Post
    The majority of the Muslims where I live are Malays and most of them expect me to become a Malay like them.
    Perhaps they see themselves as welcoming you with opening arms into the community you're living in locally, so that you feel one of them, and not isolated and alone.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ali Mujahidin View Post
    Which is something impossible. Also something I have no desire whatsoever to do. Not that I have anything against the Malays. It's just that I want to be a Muslim not a Malay.
    This sounds like the two should be mutually exclusive. You say you want to be Muslim not Malay, yet above you've mentioned the majority of Muslims where you live are Malay. These are two contradictory statements. We may be Muslims, but we are also created nations and tribes so that we may know one another, the most noble being the most God fearing. (Qur'an 49:13)

    Quote Originally Posted by Ali Mujahidin View Post
    So, what to do?
    Communicate with them, tell them how you feel, what they can do to help you.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ali Mujahidin View Post
    Only one logical thing to do. We reverts will just have to help ourselves. That's all. No born Muslim, however well-meaning, can understand the situation of a revert as well as another revert.
    This is sad. Have you told the brothers and sisters you live amongst what type of help you need? I hope this does not create an "us vs them" division.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 06-05-2013 at 10:52 PM.
    1 | Likes tearose liked this post
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by Insaanah View Post
    I hope this does not create an "us vs them" division.
    Assalamu alaikum, no, I don't think that is what he is saying. I can relate somewhat to what he and the OP said. I feel welcome and accepted by nearly all of the Muslims I have met, but at the same time I feel that I am in between two different worlds - like a fish out of water. As the brother said about not wanting to be a Malay, the point is that he can never be one in the same sense that I can never fully be a Pakistani, a Saudi or even a Briton. Just imagine for a moment if someone is the only Muslim in their family and that there is no inclination that any of his family would ever become a Muslim. Let's go a step further and say this Muslim is also a Caucasian American and that after visiting probably a dozen masjids he has personally met at most 10 other Caucasian American Muslims. There is more to establishing a sense of community than sharing the same faith.

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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by Insaanah View Post
    Perhaps they see themselves as welcoming you with opening arms into the community you're living in locally, so that you feel one of them, and not isolated and alone.
    Well, you have to experience it to know what I am talking about. Of course, they are welcoming me into the community. As long as I live like them.

    Just as an example, I want to eat from a tray (or talam, as it's called here) but they prefer to eat from a plate. I want to wear the salwar but they would rather see me wear a sarong. They hold wedding functions with all kinds of Malay customs which are derived from Hindu customs and I don't want to have anything to do with that.

    I am not sure if this is happening in Muslim communities all over the world but here, the Malays have been Muslims for so long that they have forgotten about the essence of Islam and thought that being Malay and being Muslim are synonymous. In fact, the common term for reversion here is to 'masuk Melayu' meaning 'become a Malay'.

    Again I must stress that I have nothing against being a Malay, other than the parts which are derived from Hindu customs, but the whole point of being a Muslim is to be a Muslim, not to be a Malay. Or even to be an Arab or a Pakistani. I grow my beard long, not because the Arabs do it but because the Holy Prophet does it. I wear a serban aka turban not because the Arabs do it but because the Holy Prophet does it.

    Also there is this question of the unique problems faced by the reverts. When a person reverts to Islam, he suffers the pain of separation from all that had been close and dear to him. He loves his parents and his siblings but if they do not revert, too, then he knows that he will not meet them in jannah. Imagine seeing your beloved father, mother and siblings burning in a roaring inferno and you cannot do anything to save them. No, you cannot imagine the full agony of it. Unless you are a revert.

    Please understand that I am not saying the born Muslims do not care about the reverts. I am just saying that it takes a revert to really understand what another revert goes through. And to help someone you have to understand his problem. Fully.
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd






    Faith is believing what you cannot see.
    http://areesalaam.com Islam from the viewpoint of a layman

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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Islam does not destroy cultures, but purifies them. The people whose culture has been perfectly Islamised is of course the arabs, but the malays, pakistanis, indians have also had Islam in their culture for a number of years and the effects are clear in the customs, etiquette and language. I think converts should try their best to interact with the other muslims in their area even if it is of a different culture. You do not have to abandon your culture but rather do your part to remove what is wrong so as to purify it.

    Do not forget that there was a time when the first few malays/pakistanis/indians who converted to Islam who may have also felt alone.

    It is important keep your intentions and opinions pure of your muslim brothers and sisters. Making negative general statements about them do no good for yourself. Just like any other muslim community there are amongst them who are students of knowledge and there are those who have yet to start learning. So if you meet someone who's idea of conversion is to change their race then instead of using that as a reason to not want to interact with them rather give them the excuse that they have yet to learn what is the proper meaning.

    If you wish to eat from a talam or wear a salwar I don't see how they can stop you from doing so unless they are physically doing so. Perhaps you can explain to them that it is what you prefer.
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd


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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd



    alhamdulillah, Allah prepared me well for what i found when i reverted. i wasn't bothered by a lot of the crap thrown my way. i'm not easily intimidated, nor do i really give a crap if "someone accepts me"; not my style.

    here in the states, most Masjids are communities within communities. there are bound to be misconceptions and mis-perceptions. stuff happens.

    Allah made easy on me in that before my 1st 6 months went by, i had read 5 or 6 different translations of the Qur'an, i started listening to Mufti Menk (a lot) and studied Seerah and some Tafseer. before long, my Imam and i were good friends and it is kind of easy for a "white guy" to hit "celebrity status" amid a foreign crowd. THAT is actually more difficult than being marginalized.

    again, Allah made it easy on me. i decided to put my resources to good use and began making copies of all the stuff online to give to others. Allah made it even easier when i bought my dvd copying machine. brothers would just walk up to me point to my coat (cuz they knew there would be some new dvds in my pocket).

    i feel bad for other reverts though, so i made a dvd/mp3 package and i buy Qur'ans. when someone reverts, someone comes and picks up a package for them. i haven done it for a few months due to bad health and finances, but i always have some sets (24 packs) nearly done, so a quick phone call and i can finish one up. down to my last Qur'an (the ones i give away), but soon, in shaa Allah, i will buy more.

    i work at it. i feel it as a responsibility. a few brothers always know where to find me and one brother has me make stuff for "born" Muslims in his home country in West Africa.

    we should make it our responsibility to welcome others and help them out. Allah will question us for what we did with our resources and our time.

    do the best you can and encourage others as well. and make dua!

    ma salaama
    Last edited by YusufNoor; 06-06-2013 at 11:58 AM. Reason: its in italics
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Had the non-believer known of all the Mercy which is in the Hands of Allah, he would not lose hope of entering Paradise, and had the believer known of all the punishment which is present with Allah, he would not consider himself safe from the Hell-Fire
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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by YusufNoor View Post
    i had read 5 or 6 different versions of the Qur'an
    I hope what you really meant was that you have read 5 or 6 different translations of the Quran. Right?
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd






    Faith is believing what you cannot see.
    http://areesalaam.com Islam from the viewpoint of a layman

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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by Signor View Post
    When we hear that someone has entered Islam, we often ask .How did you accept Islam? . We also say Al hamdulilah (All praises are due to Allah alone) when someone says they have reverted to Islam, Right? These remarks show that we are heartened to see someone accepting the Truth!
    There is a novelty in why someone would leave the faith they grew up with to become a Muslim because it is a relatively rare event. People want to hear what it was that attracted them to Islam and what led them to the paradigm shift change in faith. Honestly, becoming a Muslim is quite difficult and today there are many reasons for converts to Islam to revert back to a state of apparent unbelief. This is not necessarily the fault of the 'born' Muslims as you suggested, but it can be a contributing factor. People want to hear what led them to Islam, but they never want to hear from those who leave Islam regarding the difficulties they faced and why they left Islam. I left Islam for several years in part because I did not fit in as it is difficult to assimilate into a culturally diverse group with practically no one with your own cultural background. I was also offended that many brothers would speak among themselves in my presence in a language other than English. I tried desperately to find a Muslim wife, but was not able to find anyone remotely interested in me. I married a Christian and stopped practicing Islam for 16 years and then returned 12 years ago.

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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by MustafaMc View Post
    There is a novelty in why someone would leave the faith they grew up with to become a Muslim because it is a relatively rare event. People want to hear what it was that attracted them to Islam and what led them to the paradigm shift change in faith. Honestly, becoming a Muslim is quite difficult and today there are many reasons for converts to Islam to revert back to a state of apparent unbelief. This is not necessarily the fault of the 'born' Muslims as you suggested, but it can be a contributing factor. People want to hear what led them to Islam, but they never want to hear from those who leave Islam regarding the difficulties they faced and why they left Islam. I left Islam for several years in part because I did not fit in as it is difficult to assimilate into a culturally diverse group with practically no one with your own cultural background. I was also offended that many brothers would speak among themselves in my presence in a language other than English. I tried desperately to find a Muslim wife, but was not able to find anyone remotely interested in me. I married a Christian and stopped practicing Islam for 16 years and then returned 12 years ago.
    Assalamu Alaikum

    Let me clear this,this article wasn't been written by me.I've provided it with source:

    Quote Originally Posted by Signor View Post
    Though I can't advocate(since i don't know her personally) what she actually want to convey,I posted it with the purpose of making the members understand a chunk of what reverts are facing or has gone through after conversion.This article doesn't sounds to me written by a professional write but a blogger,perhaps the reason are more use of testimonies than material itself.

    Though I can't disagree many bloggers or writers may use exaggeration to attract readership.

    Regards
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd



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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by Ali Mujahidin View Post
    I hope what you really meant was that you have read 5 or 6 different translations of the Quran. Right?
    you be correct there!
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Had the non-believer known of all the Mercy which is in the Hands of Allah, he would not lose hope of entering Paradise, and had the believer known of all the punishment which is present with Allah, he would not consider himself safe from the Hell-Fire
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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd



    Quote Originally Posted by Ali Mujahidin View Post
    I am not sure if this is happening in Muslim communities all over the world but here, the Malays have been Muslims for so long that they have forgotten about the essence of Islam and thought that being Malay and being Muslim are synonymous. In fact, the common term for reversion here is to 'masuk Melayu' meaning 'become a Malay'.
    Have you heard/read the reversion story of shaykh Hussain Ye? He mentions similar struggles to the ones you mention - he was a Chinese Muslim living in a Malay community, and experienced a difficult time (back in 1968) when he reverted. He also mentions this issue of Malay and Muslim being synonymous terms. I would recommend you to watch it here if you haven't. It's a very interesting story with great lessons to be learnt for us all. Even though the early years of his reversion were the most difficult, he grew to understand why that was and appreciate going through that struggle: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCoxzrOjJ7I

    May Allaah make things easy for you and all Muslims, Aameen.
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd




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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Assalamu Alaikum YusufNoor

    May I know what do you include in you package?Talking about this

    i feel bad for other reverts though, so i made a dvd/mp3 package and i buy Qur'ans. when someone reverts, someone comes and picks up a package for them.
    One item I am sure of is something from Bilal Philips
    Last edited by Signor; 06-06-2013 at 01:15 PM.
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd



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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by Signor View Post
    Assalamu Alaikum YusufNoor

    May I know what do you include in you package?Talking about this



    One item I am sure of is something from Bilal Philips
    3 dvds on the Foundations of Islamic Studies and 1 dvd with: The True Religion of God, The Message: La Ilaha Illallah and The Status of the Sunnah.

    there is also 1 dvd with 2 different videos on how to pray; a copy of the movie, The Message; a dvd with 3 Mufti Menk lectures, 2 dvds with Sh Abdullah al Farsi explaining Tawheed and shirk; a dvd with 4 lecture by Nouman Ali Khan; a dvd ebook with the Qur'an in Arabic and English(Pickthall) that you ca watch on you tv; a regular cd i made using Mufti Menk's Taraweeh recital of al Kahf that i inserted the English into and a short talk by him on the surah (sweet for Jumu'aah); Bashar Shala: Owner of the 2 Gardens on regular cd (cuz i love it); mp3 disc with Zarabozos' 28 part Al Fatihah; a 34 part mp3 of Sh Abu Abdis-Salaam on An-Nawai's 40 hadeeth; a 2 disc mp3 os Bashar Shala's Seeral lectures; a disc by Bashar on the Khulifah and 1 on the 4 Imams; 2 mp3 discs of Mufti Menk Tafseer; Al Awlaqi's the Hereafter and 2 mp3 discs on Tafseer Juz Amma by Nouman Ali Khan.

    unfortunately the FBI keeps zapping my pc, so i can't burn new dvds, but my 5 disc dvd copier is off-line, so it still works!

    i figure that is a pretty meaty little package to gift to someone and it is very beneficial for those seeking knowledge.

    and Allah knows best!

    ma salaama
    2 | Likes جوري, Signor liked this post
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Had the non-believer known of all the Mercy which is in the Hands of Allah, he would not lose hope of entering Paradise, and had the believer known of all the punishment which is present with Allah, he would not consider himself safe from the Hell-Fire
    http://www.muftimenk.co.za/Downloads.html

  20. #16
    Ali Mujahidin's Avatar
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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by Muhammad View Post
    Have you heard/read the reversion story of shaykh Hussain Ye?
    Yes, I have personally met Brother Hussain Yee very many years ago. My memories of him is that of a soft-spoken person. I haven't heard about his reversion story from him personally, though, so I will watch the video you have linked to. JazakulLah.
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd






    Faith is believing what you cannot see.
    http://areesalaam.com Islam from the viewpoint of a layman

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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by Ali Mujahidin View Post
    I, myself, am a revert. Every now and then, I meet other reverts and we share our experiences. Being neither here nor there, more or less, sums up the situation. We are no longer part of our original community of non-Muslims, and we are also not part of the Muslim community. The majority of the Muslims where I live are Malays and most of them expect me to become a Malay like them. Which is something impossible. Also something I have no desire whatsoever to do. Not that I have anything against the Malays. It's just that I want to be a Muslim not a Malay.

    So, what to do?

    Only one logical thing to do. We reverts will just have to help ourselves. That's all. No born Muslim, however well-meaning, can understand the situation of a revert as well as another revert.
    There needs to be a revert club then. Why hasn't one been made yet?

    "Recent revert to Islam? Then join the Revert Club and get membership card, startup package on practicing Islam, quarterly Reverts newsletter, stickers, etc. Monthly get-togethers and annual Aftar dinner, news about Islamic lectures in your area, etc."

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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by WRITER View Post
    There needs to be a revert club then. Why hasn't one been made yet?
    There are already a few revert clubs where I live now, which is Malaysia.

    The main one is Perkim aka Persatuan Kebajikan Islam Malaysia viz Malaysian Muslim Welfare Association. Although the activities of Perkim are open to all Muslims, it's main focus is on reverts. There is also a Chinese Muslim Association which concentrates on the special problems of the Chinese who revert to Islam here in a pre-dominantly Malay society. Truly the problems faced by the Chinese reverts are unique and are best addressed by the Chinese reverts themselves, although I am not in great favor of breaking up the Muslim community into racial groups. There is also another association for Indian Muslim reverts.

    In Thailand, where I have lived for twenty years, there are no Muslim revert clubs that I know of. Perhaps it's because the Muslim population, even in the predominantly-Muslim South is a diverse community made up of Malays, Arabs and Pakistanis as the main groups and none of these groups are in any dominant position as far as numbers or authority is concerned. Yes, reverts in Thailand also face problems but, from what I understand, the problems are handled on a personal, family-based, case-by-case basis.

    How about on this forum?

    Do we see any need to have a section dedicated specifically to the problems faced by reverts? Maybe on a race-by-race basis? I can imagine that the problems faced by, say, a white English female revert would be rather different from that faced by, say, a black African male revert. (Do we have any black African reverts here?)
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd






    Faith is believing what you cannot see.
    http://areesalaam.com Islam from the viewpoint of a layman

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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Quote Originally Posted by Insaanah View Post
    Communicate with them, tell them how you feel, what they can do to help you.
    You know, you'd think that would be the solution to the problems that we feel as reverts but in my experience this hasn't worked very well for me. Everyone is so busy.

    Quote Originally Posted by Insaanah View Post
    This is sad. Have you told the brothers and sisters you live amongst what type of help you need? I hope this does not create an "us vs them" division.
    In my experience there is already a division but I don't think it's on purpose. I think it's more inadvertent. Where I live the Muslim sisters have all grown up together, gone to the same Islamic schools here in the U.S. together so they know each other very well. They hang out with each other all the time and I'm usually not invited to anything, rarely get the calls or the texts or social media interaction. So my way to remedy that was to be more proactive and reach out them but my messages often don't get responded to. But I don't blame them for it. We're post-college/university at this point so a lot of them are getting married now, starting families of their own, working and really don't have the time to cater to the needs of a revert. But in my own experience I don't feel any type of cultural oppression or domination here. The Muslim community where I live is quite diverse.

    But I've learned to adapt on my own. I try to spend my time learning about Islam. And it's fine for me too since I also have to work. But I can honestly say that the only time it really hurts, when it really feels lonely is during Eid.

    There is no one in my own immediate family to experience it with since I am the only Muslim in my family. So I drive to the Eid prayer alone. And it's nice seeing so many Muslims come together from different cultures wearing beautiful garments, greeting the angry scowls and stares of some non-Muslims with smiles and praying together. But then when the prayer is over, everyone goes out with their families to have food together and enjoy the day and I usually end up walking back to my car, maybe get a smoothie or ice cream for myself and drive back home to watch a cartoon movie. Can't hang out with my old friends because they're gone away from me now and the new Muslim friends seem to have their own world that I don't quite fit into.

    It's almost like you're on the outside looking into a story that you're now also a part of....except not really.
    4 | Likes MustafaMc, جوري, Hulk, Signor liked this post

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    Re: Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd

    Sis Aprender For Your Input,Its nice to see you back(the last time I remember you had some problems with forum)

    I always try to fit myself in others shoes when it comes to understanding their situation.When we are young or weak or lonely,we either looks for outside help or to gain inner strength,if the former is the case,in majority cases our maturity increases.What I am trying convey is,people may not have cared about and hurt you deliberately or unintentionally,why don't you feel a more positive way,in this case,you can find new revert sisters who are also alone in there families and need to get the same love which a revert expect from Muslims already residing.In short,how about taking new reverts under your own feathers,it will not only gives a great amount of satisfaction but also Allah's blessing.

    Assalamu Alaikum
    Reverts to Islam: Lonely in a Crowd



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