During worship services as my Christian church, I have always felt such a strong urge to bow down to God. Sometimes I do this even though it is very unusual. Sometimes I feel the presence of God so strongly that I have to fall to my knees with my head on the floor and give honor to the Creator of Heaven and Earth -- the God of everything -- the One God -- the Only God. And I sing -- THERE IS NONE LIKE YOU.
In the US, we have been shielded from Islam for many generations. Until now, people like me have grown up all their lives without knowing a THING about Islam other than the lies we are told. But you can't always blame the people who tell the lies because they are only repeating lies that were told to them as truth and they now believe they are telling the truth -- they are only ignorant, not necessarily evil.
Most of us have grown up not knowing anything about Islam, usually not even really knowing the difference between Islam, Muslim, Hindu, Buddist, etc... It's true -- most of us don't know a single thing about any of these other religions other than the fact that they are NOT Christian, which in this culture, pretty much amounts to being evil tools of the devil.
I don't say that to stir up contention -- only to explain.
Most of us learn to fear anything that is different than what we've been taught. We learn that different beliefs are very dangerous and that they will slip into your spirit and take you over and the next thing you know you'll be burning in a devil's hell for being deceived by false religion.
So we are not only shielded form information about non-Christian religions, we are taught to fear the very act of even questioning or investigating other religions. We are taught that to open a sacred text other than the Bible is opening yourself up to infectious ideas that will trap you like drugs and drag you into deception. We are taught that it is only safe to blind yourself from any information about other religions, particularly Islam.
But God will come to those he chooses, regardless of the barriers that ignorant men have built up around them.
I started thinking about Islam from many directions. First, I wondered about the people our government was demonizing and what purpose they had in doing that. Then in reading and researching the Middle East on topics of politics and culture I learned more about Islam.
What is Islam? I wondered. So I looked at some videos and took out a copy of the Qu'ran I had in my library and read some passages in it. I was very surprised to find that Allah was not a false god but that he was the ONE God -- the God of Abraham, Issac, Ishmael, Jacob, Jesus. Then I researched Israel and the history of Zionism.
I began to see that Muslims were the seed of Abraham and that Islam was the only truly mono-theistic religion and that Muslims were a people under attack from all sides.
At the same time, I was full of despair from living in the pornographic West. Even though I seemed alone in my beliefs I was deeply offended by the immodesty of our culture and the behavior of a society immersed in deviant sexuality. I couldn't understand how people were able to accept things as common place that were so blatantly, disgustingly perverted. Everywhere you go there are unclothed women and young girls deliberately acting in ways designed specifically to seduce men... not just one man -- any man. Clothing that was designed by prostitutes for one purpose -- to illicit sexual arousal in any and every man they pass by. And the whole society laughing and making jokes about it.. laughing and making jokes about adultry and infidelity and deceit. While my entire society had embraced these things I was profoundly offended by them.
And so I searched for a style of clothing that allowed me to respect myself as a Godly woman and yet was beautiful. I became interested in Middle Eastern clothing and first bought a sari. Then I shopped online and found a salwar kameez. After that, I bought a pantsuit with longer top. Then I bought a jilbab.
That day I felt truly at ease and beautiful, not only in the eyes of my husband but in the eyes of God.
Meanwhile I read more about Islam. But I didn't know much about Muhammed until just the other day when I started watching the documentary "The Prophet Muhammed." That's when I felt things changing in my heart.
I have already said that I believe God is the one God, the only God and that there is no God but God. I believe that God is Allah, the God of Abraham. I also believe that Jesus was born of the virgin Mary by a miracle wrought by the hands of God. Whether or not that makes him a "son" is sort of a technicality. And now I am seeing what a beautiful human being that Muhammed was and also that the message he brought was from God.
I also have a hard time going to the Christian church of which I am a member. I feel very lonely there and it is difficult for me to overlook the hypocrisy of present day 'Christianity.' I know there are many very sincere individuals in the faith and they are ignorant of the horrendous uses of what is now called Christianity. They don't know that their government uses their platform to gain the power they need to continue the mass atrocities presently occurring around the world, especially in Muslim countries. But I know. And because I know it is difficult for me to sit quietly.
And then I find that the Prophet Muhammed was very clear about our obligation to speak out against injustice when we see it. He was clear about charity and helping others.
I have been a humanitarian worker in social justice for years. My husband and I have a humanitarian project where we work with one of the poorest communities in the world.
What I'm starting to realize is that, even though I am a member of a Christian church and have not made a public stand otherwise, that I am a Muslim in my heart. And I am starting to realize that I have been a Muslim in many ways for a long time and just did not know it.
Yes, I am a Muslim.
NOW WHAT DO I DO?
My husband is a Christian minister. He does not really know the extent that my faith has changed. But I know he is drawn to Islam as well. He loves the dishdasha I bought for him and has asked me to get him the head covering as well. He loves the book I have here called "Caravan of Deams" by Idries Shah. He loves the modest clothing I wear and he cries whenever we watch videos showing the persecution of Muslim people.
I have ordered the documentary on the Prophet Muhammed that I am watching on youtube so that my husband and I can sit down and watch it all together in it's entirety.
I am kind of scared of how this will all work out. It's such a major step -- such a huge change. Especially when our entire lives have been lived pretty much in the Christian community.
I wish I had more posts here so I could correspond with someone on a more regular basis.
I really wouldn't mind getting email so if anyone feels led to write to me, my address is: Removed -email address, use send email on profile
Salaam,
caroline -- just another slave of Allah
Last edited by Woodrow; 12-17-2007 at 04:59 AM.
Reason: removed email
It's hard to know if it will be an easy to read copy when I'm buying it online. I guess I could check the bookstores but we're kinda snowed in right now.
Yes I'm sure of that. If we are sincere God will of course lead us to the right path all the time.
I heard a christian guy once sayting that we all are the Sons of God ! Ok the picture is more clear to me now on how Christian think of God. But why then they try to force the word literally? I think over history there have been good benifits for some people in the church out of this BIG LIE ! :laugh:
Now the first thing coming to my mind now is the clear Islamic picture of God, where we cant compare God to anything or anyone. He is one who cant be two or three, who cant have son or daughter or wife, who cant eat or drink like humans. It is really very clear in Islam.
Caroline
I think you can can get much help by reading for Ahmed Deedat. He was a very famous scholar from South Africa, for his debates with famous priests, and so many of them turned to Islam because of him. Many thousands of people did the same too.
I have often felt a need for more reverance in worship. When I'm in church services I usually am feeling that we lack a sense of who God really is. I think about how Moses couldn't even look upon Him and the power and majesty of God... In my heart I'm often thinking, "we should fall on our faces!"
Once when I was praying and singing I said, "I worship you God for who you are." and immediately after that the thought came into my head as though God said, "You don't know who I am." At that moment I realized that I DON'T know... and that none of us knows -- who He truly is. And we probably won't be able to know until we are with Him.
I often wonder how we would actually conduct ourselves if we really knew who God IS.
I have often felt a need for more reverance in worship. When I'm in church services I usually am feeling that we lack a sense of who God really is. I think about how Moses couldn't even look upon Him and the power and majesty of God... In my heart I'm often thinking, "we should fall on our faces!"
Once when I was praying and singing I said, "I worship you God for who you are." and immediately after that the thought came into my head as though God said, "You don't know who I am." At that moment I realized that I DON'T know... and that none of us knows -- who He truly is. And we probably won't be able to know until we are with Him.
I often wonder how we would actually conduct ourselves if we really knew who God IS.
I wonder what makes you want to fall on your face if it is not Islam in your heart. Every word you say, makes me sure that you are a Muslim; whether you like it or not!
In Islam we are told by prophet SAWS that when falling on our faces during prayers, we are in the closest position to God. It is felt in our hearts. It is a symbol of our submission to Him and that He is our only Creator.
the story of Moses is mentioned in Quran too. According to Quran, Moses asked God to see Him. God said you wont be able to see me, but look at the mountain. When God showed to the mountain, the mountain fell immediately and Moses was fainted !
I wonder what makes you want to fall on your face if it is not Islam in your heart. Every word you say, makes me sure that you are a Muslim; whether you like it or not!
In Islam, the Holy Spirit is understood to be the Angel Jibra'il (Gabriel). Quran 16:102 Say, "The Holy Spirit (Gabriel) has brought it down piecemeal intact from your Rabb to strengthen the faith of the believers, and to give guidance and good news to the Muslims."
Although the portions in parenthesis are interpretative, it is well known that the Angel Jibra'il is the one who brought the Quran to Muhammad (saaws) over a period of 23 years.
Quran 2:87 To Musa (Moses) We gave the Book (Torah) and sent after him other Rasools in succession; then We gave Isa (Jesus), the son of Maryam (Mary), clear Signs and strengthened him with the Holy Spirit (Gabriel). Why is it that whenever there came to you a Rasool with a message which did not suit your desires, you became so arrogant that some you called impostors and others you killed!
See also 2:253 and 5:110 for ayat (verses) where Allah (swt) supported Jesus (as) with the Holy Spirit.
All you need to pay is the shipping. This Qur'an is BEAUTIFUL. I have probably a dozen different translations and this is my favorite - not only is it beautifully put together, it has the arabic transliterated into roman characters, so it's easy for those who don't know arabic to recite, it has excellent, extensive footnotes based on a wide sampling of traditional tafsir, and it's easy to read and understand.
"The Message of the Quran by Muhammad Asad (Gibraltar, 1980) represents a notable addition to the body of English translations couched in chaste English. This work is nonetheless vitiated by deviation from the viewpoint of the Muslim orthodoxy on many counts. Averse to take some Quranic statements literally, Asad denies the occurrence of such events as the throwing of Abraham into the fire, Jesus speaking in the cradle, etc. He also regards Luqman, Khizr and Zulqarnain as 'mythical figures' and holds unorthodox views on the abrogation of verses. These blemishes apart, this highly readable translation contains useful, though sometimes unreliable background information about the Quranic Suras and even provides exhaustive notes on various Quranic themes."
My husband and I had a very difficult discussion about the Trinity last night. We had discussed it a couple of times last week but not gotten too deeply into it. Then last night while we were having our regular Bible study, he brought the excerpt in Matthew where Jesus is praying before they come to take him away to be crucified. When he read it, I could tell he thought that the scripture we were reading proved that Jesus was God. But it clearly proved that Jesus was NOT God.
When I said that he started talking and talking and talking and I said, "Please, stick to the scripture. Forget everything you've been told and look at these worlds rationally, from a purely intellectual standpoint and read what they actually say. Read the words and not all the suppositions between the lines that you've heard all your life. Just read these words."
We read it again and again and he continued to say it proved that Jesus was God but eventually his voice faltered and I could tell that he was seeing the words for the first time.
In that passage Jesus is praying to God. Why would he pray to God if he WAS God? In that passage Jesus tells God that he is ready to come to Him. He tells him that he has spread His name to the people that God sent him to, just as God instructed him to do and that those people did believe that he was sent by God. Why would he send him if he WAS him? Why would he tell him, "I've done the work you sent me to do" if he WAS God.
Then we went over the part where he says, "I am in you and you are in me" to God. Then Jesus says, "We are one." And I pointed out that my husband and I say those same things about each other. Don't we? I never say that I AM my husband but I speak for him, I sign his name legally, I represent him where ever I go. When people see me they see him and say, "Look, there's L----'s wife." Then Jesus goes on to say that all the apostles and every person in the future that believes he was sent by God will also be as one JUST THE SAME AS HE AND GOD ARE ONE.
So I said, "So by this logic every person who believes Jesus was sent by God is also God."
Then I showed him the scripture in Matthew where a person comes up to Jesus and calls him "Good Master." Jesus says to that person, "Why do you call me good?! There is only ONE GOOD and that is God. If you want to see him -- keep his commandments."
Now that is clear proof that the doctrine of the Trinity is not scriptural according to the Christian Bible.
The point is that my husband fell into despair. He kept frantically searching through the Bible and then he started crying. He said, What am I supposed to do NOW? How can I preach NOW? What can I tell the people NOW -- a LIE? Everything I've ever believed in is based on this.
Then he said, "Well I'm going to find out...." and I said, If you are going to ask people, ask people other than the ones who will tell you what you want to hear. Don't pull out scriptures that can BE CONSTRUED as supporting this theory of the the Triune God. Show me Biblical proof. I don't want to hear anybody's opinion.
It was very difficult and sad. I felt so guilty, like I had torn down the foundation of his life!!! He was so shaken... torn up. And I felt like it was my fault. At that moment that I saw his pain I wanted to take it all back. It scared me because I don't want him to change. I love him so much and what if losing this foundation of his belief causes him to change his morals? He is a very MORAL man. You hardly EVER see a man as moral as he is. He won't even watch TV because of all the vulgarity and uncovered women! He never flirts -- never. He never cusses. He never drinks alcohol or looks at women.
I don't want him to change. I feel like I have hurt him.
Caroline, your post brought tears to my eyes with the understanding, courage and tact that you have displayed. I sense that your husband is in a state of spiritual shock and that within a few short hours he has come to clearly see the scriptures for the first time while you must have had a much longer time to contemplate and assimilate these life-changing realizations. Your husband is blessed beyond measure to have someone who loves him and has a relationship that is conducive to his really contemplating that the foundation that he has built his life upon may be built on shifting sand. If his foundation is built upon solid rock, then you have done him no harm. If his foundation is built upon sinking sand, isn't it better to know that now rather than when the storm comes (Judgement Day).
Oh... thank you both so much. I tried to tell my husband that our belief in Jesus as being sent by God has not moved and never has to. That the things that are falling away are just opinions of men that we've heard all our lives -- not the true word of God and not God Himself.
One other thing for Christians to think about when you begin to question some of the things you've been told -- how did Jesus say for us to pray? Did he say to pray in the name of the father-son-holyspirit? No, he said pray like this: Our father who are in heaven -- hallowed by THY name... THY kingdom come THY will be done on earth as it is in heaven... give us...for THINE is the kingdom and the power and glory forever, amen.
Jesus gives us an example of how to pray and he does NOT say to pray to him. Jesus never says that he IS God and that we should worship him.
I just want my husband to realize that the only things that are being shaken are the constructions of men. But our faith in God is not threatened.
I think what he is going to do is go to all the writings of preachers and sermons and try to support the Trinity. I am not going to debate it with him any more. I just love him too much. God has to help him come to terms with this.
Oh I feel so sad. But it doesn't seem right to feel so sad if your on the right path???
caroline if you go onto you tube website and type in dr zakir naik and watch his videos. Because he tells you the differences between christianity and muslim. which is the true religion?
What made you become a muslim if you dont mind me asking
Interesting. I'm not officially a Muslim. I am seeking the truth. I believe that God is the only God and He alone is worthy of praise and worship. I also believe that Muhammed was a prophet and messenger sent by God. But I don't agree with all the beliefs of Islam. Does that make me Muslim? I don't know.
Sister Janann, thank you for that link. I requested a copy of the Quran. They said they have an overwhelming request for Qurans right now so it will take a month or so.
Interesting that their requests for Qurans in the US is OVERWHELMING.
Islam is the fastest growing religion in the world, especially in the US. Even with all the media smear...
It can be increadibly disheartening to lose your faith in something, especially when it was a major part of your life. It's kind of like the foundation of a house being ripped away - what does the house have left to stand on? It's a scary transition, and the house is very unstable while you lay a new foundation.
In Islam, when we feel uncertain about something, or before we make a big decision, we make a prayer called Istikhara. While it wouldn't pray the 2 rakat (units) of salat, it couldn't hurt to make the dua (supplication) that is said after the salat.
"The Message of the Quran by Muhammad Asad (Gibraltar, 1980) represents a notable addition to the body of English translations couched in chaste English. This work is nonetheless vitiated by deviation from the viewpoint of the Muslim orthodoxy on many counts. Averse to take some Quranic statements literally, Asad denies the occurrence of such events as the throwing of Abraham into the fire, Jesus speaking in the cradle, etc. He also regards Luqman, Khizr and Zulqarnain as 'mythical figures' and holds unorthodox views on the abrogation of verses. These blemishes apart, this highly readable translation contains useful, though sometimes unreliable background information about the Quranic Suras and even provides exhaustive notes on various Quranic themes."
Yes, if there's one flaw in Muhammad Asad's translation, it's that he errs on the side of logic, and discounts mystery and miracles. I recently finished his Road to Mecca, and that same view is present there as well. Saudi Aramco did a kind of summary of his autobiography, if anyone is interested in learning about him. Fascinating man.
One other thing for Christians to think about when you begin to question some of the things you've been told -- how did Jesus say for us to pray? Did he say to pray in the name of the father-son-holyspirit? No, he said pray like this: Our father who are in heaven -- hallowed by THY name... THY kingdom come THY will be done on earth as it is in heaven... give us...for THINE is the kingdom and the power and glory forever, amen .
Interestingly in Islam, every muslim says the below verses at least 17 times a day:
1. In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
2. Praise be to Allah, the Cherisher and Sustainer of the worlds;
3. Most Gracious, Most Merciful;
4. Master of the Day of Judgment.
5. Thee do we worship, and Thine aid we seek.
6. Show us the straight way,
7. The way of those on whom Thou hast bestowed Thy Grace, those whose (portion) is not wrath, and who go not astray.
You can find online versions of the Quran in many websites. www.islamicity.com and www.searchtruth.com have different translations. If you need a hardcopy, I can send you one if you want.
Oh I feel so sad. But it doesn't seem right to feel so sad if your on the right path???
Caroline, take heart. I think that it is entirely reasonable for you to feel sad and perhaps confused right now. Your whole life that you were once comfortable with and were confident it was based on the Truth is "up for grabs", so to speak. I am certain that you love your husband deeply and that you hate to see the pain and turmoil that he must be in now. You are on the verge of what I know of as a "paradigm shift" from which a new world will open to you that is full of discovery, challenges and obstacles. I pray for your continued courage and that God continue to guide you and your husband to Islam - submission to the Will of God as revealed through Prophet Muhammad.
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