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marriage

  1. #1
    zoya anwar's Avatar
    zoya anwar
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    I'm 25 year old girl from a well educated semi conservative family.my family is forcing me to get married.but I just don't want to marry any one.I don't have any reason to convince them.but I hv a gut feeling that I just can't be comfortable with this. please help me
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    Zafran's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: marriage

    salaam

    You cant be forced in a marriage as that is against Islam and therefore invalid. Furthermore you'll have to give them a good reason why you dont want to get married at 25. Families have an obligation to find a spouse for you at that age.
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    Do you think the pious don't sin?

    They merely:
    Veiled themselves and didn't flaunt it
    Sought forgiveness and didn't persist
    Took ownership of it and don't justify it
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  4. #3
    Finding Peace's Avatar
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    Re: marriage

    As salaam sister, first being forced into marriage is haram, as brother Zafran said..., if your parents force you then "remind them they will get punished for it" if you don't forgive them. And they should respect the fact that your not ready for marriage. As muslims, it is recommended for us to marry, especially in this type of society today. As humans, we have desires. If you can't handle them, then you should get married, if you can handle them, then it's ok for you to not marry. But remember we get rewarded for being married. The thing I've heard about situations like this is "sometimes we think something isn't good for us and it turns out good or we think something is good and it turns out bad." Allah (swt) knows best. Remeber Allah knows what we don't know, so ask Allah for guidance and to help you through this situation. Inshallah you end up happy.
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    MuslimahRo's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: marriage

    Don't let anyone force you to get married when you feel like you won't be comfortable with it. There must be specific reasons you feel the way you do. You are not the only one who feels uncomfortable at the thought of getting married.
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    azc's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: marriage

    Indeed, your parents can't force you but what's the reason of not getting married.Will you ever marry or not?If yes, then, when?Sister your already 25 years, what's the correct age of marriage?Are you really a ''good'' girl who doesn't have any boy friend?Sky is unlimited, if you want to fly, it'll never come to an end. But At last, somewhere you've to stop.Your parents are your well wisher. They want to see you settled before they die..Real life of a man or woman starts after marriage. Married life is beautiful.Nevertheless, if your not interested in your marriage, then you've to convince your parents with valid reason. I hope that they will not force you.If you've no reason but simply scared of marriage, then no need of fear.
    Last edited by azc; 02-05-2016 at 11:39 AM.
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  8. #6
    Asiyah3's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: marriage

    format_quote Originally Posted by zoya anwar View Post
    I'm 25 year old girl from a well educated semi conservative family.my family is forcing me to get married.but I just don't want to marry any one.I don't have any reason to convince them.but I hv a gut feeling that I just can't be comfortable with this. please help me
    1. Are you sure that for the next 50 years you won't regret your choice? I know women (especially those with strong feminist ideas) who chose to stay single, once they reached their forties become desperate for marriage.
    2. If it's because you have a negative experience from men, not every one is the same. Perhaps the issue lies with those men around you, and there could be someone with the qualities you personally desire.

    I'm no way saying you SHOULD get married. If you don't want, you shouldn't. Discontentment could lead to a problematic marriage, wronging your future spouse and not giving him his due rights etc..
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    Those who believe and obscure not their belief by wrongdoing, theirs is safety; and they are rightly guided. (6:86)

    Behold! verily on the friends of Allah there is no fear, nor shall they grieve. (10:62)
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