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need help!

  1. #1
    Eeman's Avatar Full Member
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    Unhappy need help!

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    Asalam alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,

    dear brothers and sisters first of all i would like to say Ramzan mabruk to each and every one of you... I pray that Allah swt makes this blessed and holy month a month of peace, tranqulity, joy happiness, ease and sprititual for each and every one of our ummah, i pray that every dua made to Him gets answered, every fast kept is made easy and every reward gained is Insha'Allah multiplied in ABUNDANCE!!!!
    ameen thumma ameen...

    i dunno if you guys have realised but i have not been here lately due to some major problems... yet again when Eeman thinks that her way out and relief as come to her she runs and the door shuts in her face but khair Allah swt is the greatest so im holding on really tight to patience..

    i need help in clarify this if someone could for me please... so i've been trying really hard to get my talaaq from my husband but as usual he is being the only way he know how to be may Allah swt correct him in his affairs...

    so i called the imam of the mosque that my husband goes to and who also know my husband very well to ask him for some guidance on the matter and to try and get him to help since my husband listens and talks to him much...
    since he was also the same imam that issued out the two talaaqs that my husband had given me in the past...

    now after talking to him this imam said that he cant help and that there's nothing that he can do for me... then he goes what is it that i want and i felt a bit shocked as to how he can even talk to me in such a manner so thought forget it i wont ask again so then he further carried on saying how me and my husband have already have had our talaaq... i asked how he goes cos he gave you talaaq once then you reconciled... so i said yes ok... then he goes he gave you talaaq again so then thats it... i said but we reconciled after that too... then he goes it doesnt matter it doesnt count so all that time you thought you had reconciled you were with a illegal and non mahram man.


    now i thought that if the husband gives you talaaq once and you reconcile its ok... then if he gives you talaaq second time and you reconcile then its still ok but if the third time he gives you talaaq then it is not legl for you to reconcile nor get back together unless the woman goes and gets married to another man and only if then they get divorced then there is no sin upon the woman and the former husband to get married again as long as they know that they wont transgress the limits.

    i've been trying to call every mosque that i know to talk to an imam and clarify this cos i dunno what to believe now but my luck the imams are not there and when they are they are doing prayers.

    can someone please help clarify this for me Insha'Allah

    Jazak'Allah khair in advance.

    wa salam.
    need help!

    I know that at times i may be annoying or mistaken when i say some things or it may unintentionally God forbid offend u & if that is the case then i sincerely apologise from the bottom of my heart & ask Allah swt's & ur forgiveness, so please do Insha'Allah forgive me and correct me.
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  3. #2
    Abdu-l-Majeed's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    Wa 'alaykumus-Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh!

    My respected sister,

    I think you should ask another imam or shaykh, because seems to me this involves some things about fiqh, and someone who's knowledgable in Qur'an and Sunnah will sure give you a better answer. My advice to you would be: http://www.ahlalhdeeth.com/vbe/index.php

    I pray to Allah that He SWT help you sort this out. Please keep us updated, ukhti.
    need help!

    In times of difficulties don't ever say, "Allah, I have a big problem!", say "Hey problem, I have a big Allah!"
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  4. #3
    Tania's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    Send a sms to your husband with a single word: talaq. Remember him about his duty. May be you will have the 3th one
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    Re: need help!

    "The divorce is twice, after that, you either retain her on reasonable terms or release her with kindness. And it is not lawful for you (men) to take back (from your wives) any of your mahr which you have given them, except when both parties fear they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah...."

    "And if he has divorced her (the third time) then she is not lawful to him theareafter untill she has married another husband...."

    sis read Surah Baqarah verses 229-231
    need help!

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    Speech will guide you, and silence will protect you.
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    Eeman's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    format_quote Originally Posted by Muslimah421 View Post
    "The divorce is twice, after that, you either retain her on reasonable terms or release her with kindness. And it is not lawful for you (men) to take back (from your wives) any of your mahr which you have given them, except when both parties fear they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah...."

    "And if he has divorced her (the third time) then she is not lawful to him theareafter untill she has married another husband...."

    sis read Surah Baqarah verses 229-231
    I know sis i have read it thats why i thought what i wrote in my post... but this imam plainly said to me that you have been fornificating with a non mahram for the past 5months
    need help!

    I know that at times i may be annoying or mistaken when i say some things or it may unintentionally God forbid offend u & if that is the case then i sincerely apologise from the bottom of my heart & ask Allah swt's & ur forgiveness, so please do Insha'Allah forgive me and correct me.
    chat Quote

  8. #6
    Eeman's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    format_quote Originally Posted by Tania View Post
    Send a sms to your husband with a single word: talaq. Remember him about his duty. May be you will have the 3th one
    sis tania if only you knew what i have been going thru and doing just to get myself out of this hell.
    Wallah if it was that easy and he was human and remorseful enough to do that then i wouldnt be here.
    need help!

    I know that at times i may be annoying or mistaken when i say some things or it may unintentionally God forbid offend u & if that is the case then i sincerely apologise from the bottom of my heart & ask Allah swt's & ur forgiveness, so please do Insha'Allah forgive me and correct me.
    chat Quote

  9. #7
    Eeman's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    format_quote Originally Posted by Abdu-l-Majeed View Post
    Wa 'alaykumus-Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh!

    My respected sister,

    I think you should ask another imam or shaykh, because seems to me this involves some things about fiqh, and someone who's knowledgable in Qur'an and Sunnah will sure give you a better answer. My advice to you would be: http://www.ahlalhdeeth.com/vbe/index.php

    I pray to Allah that He SWT help you sort this out. Please keep us updated, ukhti.
    salam alaikum bro..

    the link that youposted i clicked on it its a forum i believe?
    should i post a thread there you mean asking this?
    need help!

    I know that at times i may be annoying or mistaken when i say some things or it may unintentionally God forbid offend u & if that is the case then i sincerely apologise from the bottom of my heart & ask Allah swt's & ur forgiveness, so please do Insha'Allah forgive me and correct me.
    chat Quote

  10. #8
    Abdu-l-Majeed's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    format_quote Originally Posted by Eeman View Post
    salam alaikum bro..

    the link that youposted i clicked on it its a forum i believe?
    should i post a thread there you mean asking this?
    Wa 'alaykumus-Salam wa rahmatullah, my sister!

    Yes, that is a forum. If you want, post a new thread or send a pm to shaykh Haitham Hamdan or shaykh Ayman b. Khaled. They will in sha Allah give you a good advice. In the last time I saw shaykh Ayman more often there, so maybe you should try sending a pm to him.

    I personally don't have a doubt about your marriage, as after a third talaq you can't marry someone. But, as I understood, you also have problems getting talaq from your present husband. It doesn't matter much, I think that an advice from someone who knows Allah's Book and His Messengers Sunnah will give you more peace. All people I met there, including these two shaykh, have a very nice akhlaq, it's always nice talking to them, so don't hesitate. ;-)

    I hope this goes well for you, my dear sister.
    need help!

    In times of difficulties don't ever say, "Allah, I have a big problem!", say "Hey problem, I have a big Allah!"
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  11. #9
    Eeman's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    format_quote Originally Posted by Abdu-l-Majeed View Post
    Wa 'alaykumus-Salam wa rahmatullah, my sister!

    Yes, that is a forum. If you want, post a new thread or send a pm to shaykh Haitham Hamdan or shaykh Ayman b. Khaled. They will in sha Allah give you a good advice. In the last time I saw shaykh Ayman more often there, so maybe you should try sending a pm to him.

    I personally don't have a doubt about your marriage, as after a third talaq you can't marry someone. But, as I understood, you also have problems getting talaq from your present husband. It doesn't matter much, I think that an advice from someone who knows Allah's Book and His Messengers Sunnah will give you more peace. All people I met there, including these two shaykh, have a very nice akhlaq, it's always nice talking to them, so don't hesitate. ;-)

    I hope this goes well for you, my dear sister.
    Jazak'Allah khair bro is his name ayman bin khaled?
    need help!

    I know that at times i may be annoying or mistaken when i say some things or it may unintentionally God forbid offend u & if that is the case then i sincerely apologise from the bottom of my heart & ask Allah swt's & ur forgiveness, so please do Insha'Allah forgive me and correct me.
    chat Quote

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    Abdu-l-Majeed's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    format_quote Originally Posted by Eeman View Post
    Jazak'Allah khair bro is his name ayman bin khaled?
    Ameen, ukhti-l-kareemah, wa iyyaki!

    Yes, that's his name.
    need help!

    In times of difficulties don't ever say, "Allah, I have a big problem!", say "Hey problem, I have a big Allah!"
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  14. #11
    Eeman's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    Ok i have sent out a message to him Insha'Allah he will reply to me.
    need help!

    I know that at times i may be annoying or mistaken when i say some things or it may unintentionally God forbid offend u & if that is the case then i sincerely apologise from the bottom of my heart & ask Allah swt's & ur forgiveness, so please do Insha'Allah forgive me and correct me.
    chat Quote

  15. #12
    Abdu-l-Majeed's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    format_quote Originally Posted by Eeman View Post
    Ok i have sent out a message to him Insha'Allah he will reply to me.
    In sha Allah, he will.
    need help!

    In times of difficulties don't ever say, "Allah, I have a big problem!", say "Hey problem, I have a big Allah!"
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  16. #13
    Saadet's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    format_quote Originally Posted by Eeman View Post
    I know sis i have read it thats why i thought what i wrote in my post... but this imam plainly said to me that you have been fornificating with a non mahram for the past 5months
    Wait.. He's referring to your husband as the non-mahram?
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    innocent's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    I think this might help a bit.
    http://www.irf.net/irf/faqonislam/index.htm
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    Re: need help!

    format_quote Originally Posted by innocent View Post
    I think this might help a bit.
    http://www.irf.net/irf/faqonislam/index.htm
    Go to bottom of page-Queries on Islam- and then about halfway down the page there is the question-

    -27. I am a dentist by profession, my questions are: If a husband and wife have a mutual divorce,

    a. Is there an ‘Iddah period to be observed by the divorced wife?
    b. Should the divorced husband give the maintenance money for her?
    c. Can the divorced husband have sex with the divorced wife?
    d. Can the two talk on the phone to each other after the divorce?

    Click on it and read the answers.
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  20. #16
    Tania's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    Could you share with us, please what said the shaikh

    I think you should not contact the ex-husbasnd (don't send him any sms)because if i understood right your idah time its over, so you are a divorced woman.
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  21. #17
    Eeman's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: need help!

    Oh Jazak'Allahkhair bro for that forum link... may Allah swt bestow many barakahs upon him sheikh bin khalid replied back today and said the same thing as sister muslimah i also believed...

    now saying that i have read that after the 2nd talaaq there should be a new marriage contract (nikah) which we didnt do... we simply just reconciled so i sent him another message for him to clarify that for me Insha'Allah.

    ill kee you guys posted and Jazak'Allah khair everyone for helping with your posts and links. I pray that Allah swt multilpies your rewards in this blessed month is ABUNDANCE Insha'Allah.

    wa salam
    need help!

    I know that at times i may be annoying or mistaken when i say some things or it may unintentionally God forbid offend u & if that is the case then i sincerely apologise from the bottom of my heart & ask Allah swt's & ur forgiveness, so please do Insha'Allah forgive me and correct me.
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