I am attracted only to people who have had some interesting pasts. You know, Someone who has an edge. Not some person who works in his fathers business who never experienced how to be in the real world. Only lives on daily hand outs. I know some sisters find this important, for security etc. I dont. Maybe I am immature, but I find the guys in suits very off putting with their bling bling watch. My dad got me this 30k car and all that, that does not make my heart beat any faster. We have homes in the maldives and Singapore, so what?!
I am not attracted to the rich. I want a Badboy whos not afraid to make a fool out of himself...Someone whos been there and done it. Someone whos not afraid to help and get his hands dirty, Character. A man who can beat people up who mess with him, not one who calls his bodyguards.
Unfortunately, I have a richguy in my throat situation and My family are loving it! There is no mental connection, no chemistry. I dont care about the size of his wallet, if he can't even move my heart.
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
I am attracted only to people who have had some interesting pasts. You know, Someone who has an edge. Not some person who works in his fathers business who never experienced how to be in the real world. Only lives on daily hand outs. I know some sisters find this important, for security etc. I dont. Maybe I am immature, but I find the guys in suits very off putting with their bling bling watch. My dad got me this 30k car and all that, that does not make my heart beat any faster. We have homes in the maldives and Singapore, so what?!
I am not attracted to the rich. I want a Badboy whos not afraid to make a fool out of himself...Someone whos been there and done it. Someone whos not afraid to help and get his hands dirty, Character. A man who can beat people up who mess with him, not one who calls his bodyguards.
Unfortunately, I have a richguy in my throat situation and My family are loving it! There is no mental connection, no chemistry. I dont care about the size of his wallet, if he can't even move my heart.
Rant over....
Im exactly the same, but...... i have a nice guy, who loves me dearly, worships the ground i walk on and is more worried about my feelings in any situation but he has a good financial background.
win win situation I have!!
I thinkyou should try to bring the bad boy out in your husband, have some fun and try and connect with each other, all men have a rough edge, well most!
perhaps he thinks the same about you, you sound like yur both in the same situation, try getting to know each other better and you might both surpirse yourselves!!!
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
format_quote Originally Posted by Mikayeel
WaAlykumAlsalaamWarahMatAllah
Sister, what is that u want advice with? I can't really make it up from the text above.
Sorry if my post weird, i wrote it too fast maybe. I wanted to vent? -*-. Ok sure, ignore everything and delete this thread if you think that it has no purpose pls thanks. jazakalahkhayr.
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
format_quote Originally Posted by buddy1
Im exactly the same, but...... i have a nice guy, who loves me dearly, worships the ground i walk on and is more worried about my feelings in any situation but he has a good financial background.
win win situation I have!!
I thinkyou should try to bring the bad boy out in your husband, have some fun and try and connect with each other, all men have a rough edge, well most!
perhaps he thinks the same about you, you sound like yur both in the same situation, try getting to know each other better and you might both surpirse yourselves!!!
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
I am not attracted to the rich. I want a Badboy whos not afraid to make a fool out of himself...Someone whos been there and done it. Someone whos not afraid to help and get his hands dirty, Character. A man who can beat people up who mess with him, not one who calls his bodyguards.
Unfortunately, I have a richguy in my throat situation and My family are loving it! There is no mental connection, no chemistry. I dont care about the size of his wallet, if he can't even move my heart.
Sorry sis, im a bit slow at getting the full drift. When you say 'badboy', do you mean someone with a criminal record etc?
Oh hang on! you mean at least as rough as that anyway, since you say you want a man who can beat people up! Why would you want a man who beats people up? Money or no money, a real man is one who controls his temper and is not aggressive. That's harder to do than to lose it. What if you end up on the wrong side of him sis? Please give it deep thought and ask yourself if you'd really feel comfortable having children with a man who loses his rag at the drop of a hat and probably ends up with a conviction in the process? How would he be a good role model to your children?
The Prophet (saw) and his companions (may Allah be pleased with them) are the best examples of bravery and manliness. Yet at the same time they feared Allah and did not transgress the limits set by Him. They are the ones who truly feared none but Allah. But they did not go round knocking the stuffing out of ppl who 'messed' with them. Those are the characteristics you should look for in a man. Strong and just (and pious). Then you really could have the best of both worlds.
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
This is the only post from all the others that makes sense...... We should be grateful forwhat we have. Why are you wanting too change it??????? People would be happy to have what you have a "badboy"???????? Do you want to ruin your life.... Well done Scents of Jannah, again you have excelled in the way you have spoken!!!
format_quote Originally Posted by Scents of Jannah
Sorry sis, im a bit slow at getting the full drift. When you say 'badboy', do you mean someone with a criminal record etc?
Oh hang on! you mean at least as rough as that anyway, since you say you want a man who can beat people up! Why would you want a man who beats people up? Money or no money, a real man is one who controls his temper and is not aggressive. That's harder to do than to lose it. What if you end up on the wrong side of him sis? Please give it deep thought and ask yourself if you'd really feel comfortable having children with a man who loses his rag at the drop of a hat and probably ends up with a conviction in the process? How would he be a good role model to your children?
The Prophet (saw) and his companions (may Allah be pleased with them) are the best examples of bravery and manliness. Yet at the same time they feared Allah and did not transgress the limits set by Him. They are the ones who truly feared none but Allah. But they did not go round knocking the stuffing out of ppl who 'messed' with them. Those are the characteristics you should look for in a man. Strong and just (and pious). Then you really could have the best of both worlds.
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
format_quote Originally Posted by buddy1
Im exactly the same, but...... i have a nice guy, who loves me dearly, worships the ground i walk on and is more worried about my feelings in any situation but he has a good financial background.
win win situation I have!!
I thinkyou should try to bring the bad boy out in your husband, have some fun and try and connect with each other, all men have a rough edge, well most!
perhaps he thinks the same about you, you sound like yur both in the same situation, try getting to know each other better and you might both surpirse yourselves!!!
^
sister worship is only for allah and no one else...not you ...not buddy love.... no one!!
Last edited by Cabdullahi; 10-28-2008 at 11:48 AM.
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
format_quote Originally Posted by Scents of Jannah
Sorry sis, im a bit slow at getting the full drift. When you say 'badboy', do you mean someone with a criminal record etc?
Oh hang on! you mean at least as rough as that anyway, since you say you want a man who can beat people up! Why would you want a man who beats people up? Money or no money, a real man is one who controls his temper and is not aggressive. That's harder to do than to lose it. What if you end up on the wrong side of him sis? Please give it deep thought and ask yourself if you'd really feel comfortable having children with a man who loses his rag at the drop of a hat and probably ends up with a conviction in the process? How would he be a good role model to your children?
The Prophet (saw) and his companions (may Allah be pleased with them) are the best examples of bravery and manliness. Yet at the same time they feared Allah and did not transgress the limits set by Him. They are the ones who truly feared none but Allah. But they did not go round knocking the stuffing out of ppl who 'messed' with them. Those are the characteristics you should look for in a man. Strong and just (and pious). Then you really could have the best of both worlds.
Thanks sis. I didnt mean that kind of a bad boy. I meant someone like Umar Ibn Al-Khattab (ra) in character but who has the mercy of Abu bakr (ra).
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
I also dont like men who don't know anything about real life and are spoonfed by their daddies all their lives.
But then, not all rich boys are like that. I'll give you an example of someone I know so well.
His dad runs a big company, making millions a year, but he refuses to work in it. He opens his own company which rivals his dad. But after a while I guess he got tired of working and wanted something better and went to study deen. He came back, without a job. He left his company in good but not smart hands and it went down. so he went to work with his dad. He took his dads company to a whooole new level. Simply because he was smart and daring and knew how to work hard and take risks.
Now thats the kind of rich bad guy I like
And people dont' get worked up. Shes just mentioning the type of guy she wishes she had.
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
Sorry I don't mean to offend .. but what is the point of this thread ?! You're not exactly asking for advise and simply stating you want a 'bad boy' for a husband. I personally don't like either of the choices you presented above. They both sound spoilt lol.
Good for you ! Want my opinion on 'bad boys' ? Here goes..
They have no respect for themselves or the women they 'charm'. Yes respect. There's a stark difference between true respect/honour and 'gangster' respect. Here's what I think respect is..
1. Helping your elders, loving your parents regardless of who they are, whenever they need you.
2. Politeness, etiquettes, manners around your relatives and friends.
3. Working hard at your job, no matter what work you do.
4. Being able to take humiliation, defeat and get back up on your feet. Knowing when you've made a mistake and admitting it.
5. Sacrificing for your family and friends.
This is what respect isn't..
1. Being a thug and beating up people, to look 'hard'.
2. Being rude, unwelcoming and abrasive to people from other cultures .i.e. 'non-muslim ppl'.
3. Ignorance, arrogance, stupidity. Not knowing when your wrong.
4. Selfish behaviour. Unwillingness to sacrifice for others.
Bad boy's come and go everyday, REAL gentlemen/ladies don't. I guess you're going through a phase. Hell, even I went through a phase where I wanted a 'hot' wife, how wrong was I lol...
Please omit if you didn't mean 'gangster' type badboys lol, I think I misread your post
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
^The sista obviously clarified wat she meant wit "badboy". She didnt say anything of that sort?
A man who can beat people up who mess with him, not one who calls his bodyguards.
I think wit that she means, like: Someone who can stand up for his woman, fearless when need be? Not somene who randomly beats people up lol...duhh!
Sista dont feel pressured to marry anybody that ur not ready to marry. MashaAllah at the example u gave of umar * abu bakr. Nice combination! May Allah bless you wit wt u desire ameen.
I also dont like men who don't know anything about real life and are spoonfed by their daddies all their lives.
nicely put sis.
Learn Patience from Asiyah, Loyalty from Khadijah, Sincerity from Aisha and Steadfastness from Fatima.
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Thanks sis. I didnt mean that kind of a bad boy. I meant someone like Umar Ibn Al-Khattab (ra) in character but who has the mercy of Abu bakr (ra).
Alhumdulillah for that!
Im relieved. But you arent being forced sis. Neither can you be. I suggest getting a fave aunt/mum's friend to intervene and explain your views to your family. Honestly, I've observed parents paying more attention to what their 'friends' say than to their kids. And I figured it's because their friends/relatives are the sameish age and so they think they are wise like them. And they think their kids are too immature to know whats good for them so they dont listen. Good luck.
May Allah grant you a hubby like you desire inshaAllah. Ameen.
Re: BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
Well good choice... MashaAllah
May Allah Grant you your happiness! Amiin
And as for the onewho fears standing in front of His Lord and restrainsthe soul from impure evil desires and lusts, verily, Paradise will be his abode [79:40-41]
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BadBoys VS I work in my Dads rich Business Boy
This is the only post from all the others that makes sense...... We should be grateful forwhat we have. Why are you wanting too change it??????? People would be happy to have what you have a "badboy"???????? Do you want to ruin your life.... Well done Scents of Jannah, again you have excelled in the way you have spoken!!!
format_quote Originally Posted by Scents of Jannah
And they think their kids are too immature to know whats good for them so they dont listen. Good luck.
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