planning

[yusuf18]

i just wanted to see responces on this i plan on have 4 wives who are virgins is this wrong mindset i know i got permishion from allah has given green light but i just want to see what you think how would you feel if you had a family member with this mindset

[convert]

you have fun with that. i wouldnt give my daughter or sister to someone who wanted to have more than 1 wife.

[glo]

Are you serious, Yusuf??

I can just about understand that a man might be married to one wife and then marry another, according to his circumstances.

But to start off with the intent of marrying 4 women? I mean, why??!
Are you sure you are not compensating for something or needing to inflate your male ego??
(No offence intended, but please explain your reasons to me, so I can even begin to understand ...)

Peace

[yusuf18]

Are you serious, Yusuf??

I can just about understand that a man might be married to one wife and then marry another, according to his circumstances.

But to start off with the intent of marrying 4 women? I mean, why??!
Are you sure you are not compensating for something or needing to inflate your male ego??
(No offence intended, but please explain your reasons to me, so I can even begin to understand ...)

Peace

so i can express myself freely and lead an islamic life at same time

[ragdollcat1982]

I could not share my husband with another woman no matter what. For now I think I am going to stay a Christian and continue to learn more about Islam, but if I were a Muslim woman I would not want to be in a plural marriage type relationship.

[convert]

so i can express myself freely

oh boy.

from that comment, it shows you wouldn't even be able to handle 1 wife properly.

my thoughts:

im not gonna say i wont take more than 1 wife... i will say that i dont really see this happening. i doubt i would be able to treat them equally and i dont think i could put up with the stress. besides, im not even married yet (make dua for me) so its basically a moot point.

[yusuf18]

I could not share my husband with another woman no matter what. For now I think I am going to stay a Christian and continue to learn more about Islam, but if I were a Muslim woman I would not want to be in a plural marriage type relationship.

thats your call sister but i hope you will become a muslim inshallah and may god guide you to the staight path

[ragdollcat1982]

so i can express myself freely and lead an islamic life at same time

May i please ask how old you are, you strike me as a young person. What do you mean by express yourself freely? Carnally? Brother having more than one wife is a big responisbilty. You have to support each of them financiallty in the same manner and have to give equal affection and time. From what I have read on this subject in the QUran, while a man can marry up to four it seems to encourage marrying only one and every Muslim man I have personally met and I met many as a child because my uncle was a doctor, had only one wife .

[glo]

so i can express myself freely

And that would be a euphemism for what exactly??

Yusuf, can I ask you how old you are?

[Sahabiyaat]

so i can express myself freely and lead an islamic life at same time

look foward to being single for the rest of your life, cuz no 4 women will agree to being your sex objects.

By you mentioning virgins in particular,this just means u want one thing from marriage , and marriage is far more than that.

[yusuf18]

And that would be a euphemism for what exactly??

Yusuf, can I ask you how old you are?

A young man

[Sahabiyaat]

btw i take it u must be pretty rich to suppport these four virgins?

[yusuf18]

btw i take it u must be pretty rich to suppport these four virgins?

sister please dont take this as a offence i am alowed to do it if i want 2 but allah knows and yes i do have the funds for this

[ragdollcat1982]

sister please dont take this as a offence i am alowed to do it if i want but allah knows

You have to support them all in the same manner and that can be costly, not to mention children from each wife. You cant put one up in a mansion and another in a shack.

[yusuf18]

You have to support them all in the same manner and that can be costly, not to mention children from each wife. You cant put one up in a mansion and another in a shack.

i would never marry more women if the first one doesnt want and who knows maybe the first is so good i dont need to marry allah knows best

[convert]

sister please dont take this as a offence i am alowed to do it if i want 2 but allah knows and yes i do have the funds for this

somehow i doubt this. like i said, i wouldnt marry my daughter or sister to someone who wanted more than 1 wife.

[Sahabiyaat]

I am offended...your request is almost treating women as if they are objects.

like said before, i would yunderstand if a man married another woman after being married once, or if someone remarried for the purposes of giving security to a widow and her children, or even if he fell in love again with someone and just had to marry them for it to be halal.

But to have four virgins, your making your intentions very clear.
Allah has indeed allowed men polygamy, but you are abusing the reasoning
behind it.

[yusuf18]

I am offended...your request is almost treating women as if they are objects.

like said before, i would yunderstand if a man married another woman after being married once, or if someone remarried for the purposes of giving security to a widow and her children, or even if he fell in love again with someone and just had to marry them for it to be halal.

But to have four virgins, your making your intentions very clear.
Allah has indeed allowed men polygamy, but you are abusing the reasoning
behind it.

my dear sister polgamy was alowed becouse allah the most high knows men more then you so he alowed men to marry up to 4 to do it halal way inshallah

[ragdollcat1982]

oh boy.

from that comment, it shows you wouldn't even be able to handle 1 wife properly.

my thoughts:

im not gonna say i wont take more than 1 wife... i will say that i dont really see this happening. i doubt i would be able to treat them equally and i dont think i could put up with the stress. besides, im not even married yet (make dua for me) so its basically a moot point.

Convert when I was in college I was friends with a young man from Kuwait. We talked once about us getting married so he could get his green card to stay in the US. I asked him if he planned on having more wives than just myself and he told me why would he go and do a thing like that. It would be bad enough having one nag at him, much less 4. He meant that literally and jokingly. But if you decided to take another wife and it bothered your first wife would you still go ahead and do it or would you choose not to do it as not to cause her anguish?

[ragdollcat1982]

my dear sister polgamy was alowed becouse allah the most high knows men more then you so he alowed men to marry up to 4 to do it halal way inshallah

A muslim man should look to the example of Muhammed on this. He only married one virgin and I do not beleive Aisha was only 9, I think she was a teenager at least. His other wives were either divorced or widowed and these marriages were more of a humanitarian gesture.