I have been having several arguments with a friend of mine who thinks it is ok for a women to go to a cemetory. I have always been told that women are strictly forbidden.
A woman should visit the graveyard only once, when it's her funeral.
However you need to understand who you're talking to and what is the essence of "ok". If they're moderate Arabs of Levant countries or Egypt, you'll hear a mouthful if you say women shouldn't go to graveyards. It's traditional to them and in Egypt they still use Pharonic style tombs to bury the family together in open rooms. Unislamic but won't get you anywhere arguing. Just repeat to them in gentle manner that it is Islamic to bury the right way and for women not to go to the graveyard.
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Iblis's eternal destination in the Hellfire is due to Arrogance, not Disbelief.
Islam does not place any restriction against women visiting graves and graveyards except that they must not wail and cry aloud when they are there. The Prophet originally told women not to visit graveyards, but towards the end of his life, he said to them: “I had told you not to visit graves; now I am telling you to visit them.” The reason was that Arab women used to wail at graves. The Prophet wanted this practice to be stopped. Therefore, he banned women from visiting graves to start with. After sometime, when Muslim women were better aware of how Islam wants them to behave in different situations, he allowed them such visits. In fact, the Prophet encourages visiting graveyards because such a visit reminds the visitor of his or her own death and the fact that they would have to stand in front of God when their actions are reckoned to determine their reward or punishment. Scholars like Ibn Qudamah, of the Hanbali school of law, make it clear that since this is the purpose of visiting graveyards, both men and women need such visits. Muslims, however, often deny women their rights under all sorts of pretexts.
These are un-Islamic. One such example is that which the reader’s wife has been told, claiming that she is seen naked by the dead. This is most absurd. The dead cannot see their visitors. How can they, when they have no eyesight, and no vision whatsoever? It is all a superstition. Having said that, I may add that the reader’s wife can always pray for her father and son, without having to go to the graveyard. Whatever she prays God for them, from any place, will be accepted, God willing.
Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds; and Blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.
Fuqaha (Jurists) differed concerning “women’s visit to graves”.
The correct opinion is that it is permissible with some conditions. The evidence is a Hadith; Imam Muslim narrated it. Buraidah ( may Allaah be pleased with him) reported from Prophet Muhammad (Blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), he said:” I forbade you to visit graves, but you may now visit them, for that is a reminder of the Hereafter”. The woman also needs to be reminded the death just as the man.
The Prophet (Blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Women are the second half of men”.
The Hadith: “May Allah curse those women who frequently visit the graves, and those who kindle lamps on them” shows that the curse of Allah will be upon those women who frequently visit graves, or those women who have lack of patience or those who mourn.
Reported Abu Saeed Al-Khudri, the Prophet (Blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “I forbade you to visit graves, now you can visit them. Indeed, the graves visit teaches lessons, and do not tell any thing which is disliked in Islam”.
In short, women can visit graves on condition that there should not be any act against Islam, i.e., crying, mourning, lamentation, Shamelessness etc. In addition to that, the visit should be occasionally. She should also be accompanied by a Mahram . Allah knows best.
The consensus of scholars agree on women being forbidden from visiting the graves. The hadith mentioned to be specific to women has no authentication to support it.
"Ruling on women visiting graves
My aunt’s father died and she visited his grave once. She wants to visit it again, but she has heard a hadeeth which means that women are forbidden to visit graves. Is this hadeeth saheeh, and if it is saheeh, is she guilty of a sin for which kafaarah (expiation) is required?
Praise be to Allaah.
The correct view is that it is not allowed for women to visit graves, because of the hadeeth mentioned. It was narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) cursed women who visit graves. Women should stop visiting graves. The woman who visited a grave out of ignorance (of this ruling) is not to blame, but she should not do it again. If she does so, she has to repent and seek forgiveness, and repentance cancels out whatever came before. Visiting graves is only for men. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Visit graves, for they will remind you of the Hereafter.” At the beginning of Islam, visiting graves was not allowed for men and women alike, because the Muslims were new in Islam and came from a background where grave-worship and attachment to the dead were widespread. So they were forbidden to visit graves as a preventative measure, to avoid evil and prevent shirk. But once Islam was well-established and they understood Islam, Allaah prescribed visiting the graves because of the lessons and reminders of death and the Hereafter involved in that, and so that they could make du’aa’ for the deceased and pray for mercy for them. Then Allaah forbade woman to do that – according to the most correct of the two scholarly opinions – because they may present a temptation to men and even to themselves, and because they have little patience and they get too upset. So by His mercy and kindness towards them, Allaah forbade them to visit graves. This is also a form of kindness towards the men, because if they were all to gather at the grave, this might cause fitnah. So by His mercy, Allaah forbade women to visit graves.
But with regard to the prayer (women praying the funeral prayer), there is nothing wrong with that. Women may join the funeral prayer. The prohibition applies only to visiting the graves. Women should not visit graves according to the more correct of the two scholarly opinions, because of the ahaadeeth which indicate that that is forbidden. She does not have to offer any kafaarah, all she has to do is repent.
From Fataawa wa Maqaalaat Mutanawwi’ah li Samaahat al-Shaykh al-‘Allaamah ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him), vol. 9, p. 282"
T.I.A has quoted a fatwa which states that Muhammed initially forbid women to visit graves, but later in life allowed them to; therefore women are allowed to visit graves.
Sampharo has quoted a fatwa stating that women are not allowed to visit graves.
How do you decide which fatwa to follow in this matter, if different fatwas give different rulings?
Peace glo
Here I stand.
I can do no other.
May God help me.
Amen.
Come, let us worship and bow down •
and kneel before the Lord our Maker
[Psalm 95]
..How do you decide which fatwa to follow in this matter, if different fatwas give different rulings?
After reading anyone's opinion , I first check what Quran says about it . Then Hadith. As there is no bar in Quran against women's going to graveyard , I will go with the hadith that allows us
There is a hadith that says : «When the [Muslim] offspring of Adam dies, [the rewards of] his deeds stop except for three: a charity resulting in a continuing benefit, knowledge benefiting others, and a pious offspring making supplication to Allah for him.»
I like to make dua/ supplication for dad after reciting from holy Quran beside his grave . God Willing , it will be accepted and God Knows Best.
Christ will never be proud to reject to be a slave to God .....holy Quran, chapter Women , 4: 172
No no no, that is my opinion. I think you have to look at which evidences and hadiths are stronger, and more solid. My above comment was at the thread starter.
The scholars that have favoured the view I mentioned, of them Ibn Abbas, Ibn Al-Qayyem, Ibn Abdul Wahhab, Ibn Taymeyya, Ibn Baz, Ibn Uthaiman, Shanqeetee, Al-Monajjed, and many other great names. On the other hand Sheikhs like Al-Albani and others feel it is permissible.
Some Sheikhs who who think it is permissible use Sunnah evidence that speak of the prophet seeing a woman crying at a grave and he told her off crying, but did not tell her off being there.
The hadith brother T.I.A. mentioned was regarding men, not women, because everyone was forbidden from visiting graves, and later it was allowed, but the forbiddence remained for the women. Hadith of sister Muslim Woman refers to praying and supplicating for the dead person, which is not necessarily done AT the grave.
Permissibility was actually based a different source which is Aisha's hadith that she went to visit her brother's grave, which was authenticated by Al-Hakem. Al-Idreesi and as I mentioned great Sheikh Al-Albani believe so as well.
My opinion goes to be with the majority of scholars who say it is not permissible because the hadith of impermissibility is authentic and is a straightforward cursing of those who commit the act. I wouldn't take such a chance.
Last edited by Sampharo; 09-10-2009 at 03:09 PM.
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Iblis's eternal destination in the Hellfire is due to Arrogance, not Disbelief.
No no no, that is my opinion. I think you have to look at which evidences and hadiths are stronger, and more solid. My above comment was at the thread starter.
and how do we do that when we do not have the tools to check this? We ask the people of knowledge and if they give us two different fatawas then we take from the one who is better than the other one in knowledge and piety. At the end of the day it kinds of come down to how our hearts feels about it and our tarjeeh could be based on the fact that we feel that one mufti presented stronger evidence or arguments.
@Sampharo
the issue of majority and minority are not much relevant to awam because there could be the case that minority opinion has stronger evidence but due to our lack of ilm we do not know. So saying that the majority opinion says this; therefore, we should accept it is not the right way to go about.
sometime it could be the case that one opinion is completely invalid; therefore, we need to be careful to whom we refer to when asking questions. and remain open minded, insha'Allah
format_quote Originally Posted by Muslim Woman
Salaam/Peace
After reading anyone's opinion , I first check what Quran says about it . Then Hadith. As there is no bar in Quran against women's going to graveyard , I will go with the hadith that allows us
There is a hadith that says : «When the [Muslim] offspring of Adam dies, [the rewards of] his deeds stop except for three: a charity resulting in a continuing benefit, knowledge benefiting others, and a pious offspring making supplication to Allah for him.»
I like to make dua/ supplication for dad after reciting from holy Quran beside his grave . God Willing , it will be accepted and God Knows Best.
sister, may Allah preserve you, it is not the job of awam (laypeople/common folks), like ourselves, to check fatwas with the Qur'an or hadith or try to understand them at their face value because we do not have the tools to do this. The Qur'an tells us to ask the people of knowledge, those who are known for knowledge and piety, and that is all we have to do.
How do you know that this hadith is not abrogated or is the only hadith on this issue and not further explained by other ahadith etc.?
and by Allah know that it is bid'ah to recite the Qur'an beside graves.
Allahu A'lam
format_quote Originally Posted by glo
How do you decide which fatwa to follow in this matter, if different fatwas give different rulings?
عن تميم بن أوس الداري أن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم: قال الدين النصيحة ثلاثا قلنا لمن يا رسول الله قال لله ولكتابه ولرسوله ولأئمة المسلمين وعامتهم - رواه مسلم
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