I am having alot of trouble lately. My husband has an addiction to weed. Heis smoking constantly. From the time he wakes up to right before he falls asleep he is smoking. He can't seem to go more than 30 mins without smoking.
Its causing a lot of problems, but the major ones are:
he can't do his prayers because he is stoned.
he can't support us, because he is spending $40 a day on weed
he is a very different person when he is stoned
his coughing is getting worse, he throws up several times a day from coughing,it sounds so painful
Its hard living with him when he is constantly stoned, constantly smoking. I often leave the room for hours at a time so I don't have to smell it. He is well aware of how I feel about it. I hate it, I've tried reasoning with him, telling how bad it is for him, how bad it is for me.
He get upset with me if I ever mention it, and is unhappy that i spend so much time away from him (in another room).
Before I met him, before I became a Muslim, i used to smoke also. I'm aware of how it affects a person, and I thank Allah that when I found Islam it was all too easy (hamdul'Allah) to put weed behind me, and even easier to put alchol behind me too. But sometimes it's diffictult to be around it without thinking about doing it to. I have been strong (hamdul'Allah) and haven't given in to the stray thoughts of doing it. (I've had nightmares of starting again and being so terrified that when i wake up and find that I didn't I'm so happy, only to see him still sitting with the weed by HIS side)
He is still smoking alot,and from the sound of it, he has no plans to ever stop.
He reasons that he has had a hard life, and he is entited to do this, so he can relax. I know his life wasn't easy, but from all that he has told me, plenty of other people have had it a whole lot worse. And even if it really was super hard, that shouldn't give him an excuse to sin?
He says he doesn't think it is a sin to smoke weed, even though in definatly effects his mind, takes away all his motivation, make him forgetful, spiteful and mean.
so,..... what can I do. I want to help him. I really do
I feel for you sister and i understand your situation. It can be hard for someone to quit without being motivated. I would suggest making alot of Dua and let him know you are praying for him too. Showing your concern without being a nag is important too if you want him to listen. Hopefully if you can show him you are genuinely concerned with his health and his spirituality maybe he will try. It has to be his choice so tell him how you feel but you must be patient and ask Allah for help.
I am having alot of trouble lately. My husband has an addiction to weed. Heis smoking constantly. From the time he wakes up to right before he falls asleep he is smoking. He can't seem to go more than 30 mins without smoking.
Its causing a lot of problems, but the major ones are:
he can't do his prayers because he is stoned.
he can't support us, because he is spending $40 a day on weed
he is a very different person when he is stoned
his coughing is getting worse, he throws up several times a day from coughing,it sounds so painful
Its hard living with him when he is constantly stoned, constantly smoking. I often leave the room for hours at a time so I don't have to smell it. He is well aware of how I feel about it. I hate it, I've tried reasoning with him, telling how bad it is for him, how bad it is for me.
He get upset with me if I ever mention it, and is unhappy that i spend so much time away from him (in another room).
Before I met him, before I became a Muslim, i used to smoke also. I'm aware of how it affects a person, and I thank Allah that when I found Islam it was all too easy (hamdul'Allah) to put weed behind me, and even easier to put alchol behind me too. But sometimes it's diffictult to be around it without thinking about doing it to. I have been strong (hamdul'Allah) and haven't given in to the stray thoughts of doing it. (I've had nightmares of starting again and being so terrified that when i wake up and find that I didn't I'm so happy, only to see him still sitting with the weed by HIS side)
He is still smoking alot,and from the sound of it, he has no plans to ever stop.
He reasons that he has had a hard life, and he is entited to do this, so he can relax. I know his life wasn't easy, but from all that he has told me, plenty of other people have had it a whole lot worse. And even if it really was super hard, that shouldn't give him an excuse to sin?
He says he doesn't think it is a sin to smoke weed, even though in definatly effects his mind, takes away all his motivation, make him forgetful, spiteful and mean.
so,..... what can I do. I want to help him. I really do
Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb my sister i sympathise with your problem but we can do and say what we want but ONLY Allah can guide someone and all we can do is inform them the best we can and make dua for them.
This is a very serious issue and your husband should have fear of Allah for his actions are destroying him and if he were to die intoxicated then he would surely die without imaan. We will be raised how we died so if he dies intoxicated then he woulkd be raised up intoxicated! Tell him is it worth the risk?
My sister continue to try and get it through to him that his actions are going to lead him to the dying with imaan as well as the grave punishment and Jahannam. But don't nag him too much as this would never work.
Try to make him realise that he should be proud to have a wife like you who is very decent and inclined towards Islam
You should sit them down everyday even for a few minutes and read them a couple of hadith because even a little reminder everyday may impact on them positivley and eventually Allah may unseal their hearts.
You should remind them about death often and that we can die ANY second so if he were to die in the state of intoxication would he be able to bare etrnity of torture?
He is trapped and stuck in this way of life and is blocking out reality by living everyday in a daze.
You should keep reminding them that he should be making preperations for the hereafter by doing good deeds and pleasing Allah and that what he is doing right now is causing the anger of Allah and what we he do if death came to him now?
You should encourage them to visit the grave at least once a week as death is the destroyer of all pleasures. He needs to be reminded of death so that he can realise that they could die at any second.
My sister dua is the best weapon for a Muslim so make dua for them all the time and cry to Allah and he will listen to your prayers inshallah.
Tell him the next times you make a joint and before you spark it, remember that if death overcomes you whilst you are in that state then you wil die without imaan because when a person intoxicates themself imaan CANNOT stay in the body!
The first 7 part short talks are by Sheikh Ahmed Ali on Intoxication and are BRILLIANT to make those who intoxicate themselves realise the reality of what they are doing and to shock them in to giving up their evil habit.
Make sure you make him listen to all these talks! There are also talks on death, Hell fire and punishment of the grave. Once he listens to these talks reality will hit him and he will give up this evil habit inshallah let us have full hope, faith, reliance and trust in Allah.
Show them these short video clips as they are VERY effective:
[1]Sheikh Ahmed Ali, Bayan on Intoxication [Part 1]
you should see a reliable imam about this. he is neglecting your rights by not providing for you.
in the meantime, do your best to invite him back to Islam and on to the Right Path. make dua for him. all the best
...desperate for husnul-khitaam...
please make dua that Allah grants me a good end (to my life). please make dua that Allah guides me.
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