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what to do

  1. #1
    mammyluty's Avatar Full Member
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    what to do

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    asalaam alaikum

    when u fall out with ur mother and she tells u never to call her again and shell never come to your house again.what do u do.i dont want to go into details as to what happend,al i can say is i regret the things i did on my part that caused all the conflict.

    May Allah fill her heart wth forgiveness and mercy!
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    Hamza Asadullah's Avatar Moderator
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    Re: what to do

    format_quote Originally Posted by mammyluty View Post
    asalaam alaikum

    when u fall out with ur mother and she tells u never to call her again and shell never come to your house again.what do u do.i dont want to go into details as to what happend,al i can say is i regret the things i did on my part that caused all the conflict.

    May Allah fill her heart wth forgiveness and mercy!
    Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, it does depend on what you did to her but you should realise that mothers have been given the highest status and therefore any wrong you did towards her you must ask her forgiveness for. Give her some time to cool down but let her know how sorry you are and that you would nevr behave in such a way and that you did a big mistake.

    Ask of Allah to soften her heart so that she can forgive you and talk to you again. We must NOT even say "uff" to our parents even if they wronged us or oppressed us. We must ALWAYS speak to them in a low and soft tone and treat them the best regardless of how they treat us. The way we treat our parets that is the way our children will treat us so we should be very careful how we speak to our parents lest our children also speak to us and treat us in the same manner.

    Therefore continue to try and gain her forgiveness and give her some time. Ask of Allah to forgive you also for the way you treated your mother. If she is in old age then that is more reason to treat her the best.

    One of the salaf wept when one of his parents died, and said, “I used to have two doors to Paradise; now one of them has closed.” And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “May his nose be rubbed in the dust (may he be humiliated), whose parents, or one of them, reach old age during his lifetime, then he is not forgiven.”

    And Allah knows best in all matters
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    How to get through Hardships & trials in life:

    https://www.islamicboard.com/advice-...mp-trials.html

    How to overcome Waswas (insinuating whispers of shaythan) in Worship:

    https://www.islamicboard.com/advice-...d-worship.html

    10 Steps to Increasing Imaan & getting closer to Allah:

    https://www.islamicboard.com/manners...d-version.html

    https://www.islamicboard.com/manners...ser-allah.html
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  4. #3
    Ğħαrєєвαħ's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: what to do

    Aslaamu`Alaaykum

    Im speaking from experience, what i usually do is be patient for a day or two by not speaking to my mother and then i end up laughing so im back to normal again with my dear Mother , but i would also apologise and ask her to forgive me or just maybe start talking normal and things get back to normal InshaAllaah. Go and meet her and spend time with her as you usually would with your Mother and InshaAllah things are back to normal and also Ask Allaah for help.

    Hope that helps inshaAllaah and Ameen to the Dua, May Allaah have you and your mother be happy with each other again Ameen

    Wa`Alaaykum Salaam
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    "Allah! La ilaha illa Huwa (none has the right to be worshipped but He), Al-Hayyul-Qayyum (the Ever Living, the One Who sustains and protects all that exists).".."[Al Qur'aan 3:2]
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  5. #4
    cat eyes's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: what to do

    if i were you id be begging her to forgive me.. id hate to be cursed.. its one of the major sins to wrong your parents especially mother.

    what ever happened just ask her for forgiveness i think once she forgives you then Allah will forgive you too.
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    Salahudeen's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: what to do

    Walaykum salaam wr wb, we all fall into mistakes sister but do not despair from the mercy of Allah who is ever merciful to his slaves and loves it when his slave turns to him in repentence. So make repentence and ask you're mother for forgivness. You should not feel shy or embarressed to cry and beg your mother for forgivness.
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  8. #6
    Ummu Sufyaan's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: what to do

    wa alaykum us-Salaam

    if i were in your shoes i would keep talking and talking (i.e keep in contact with her). keep upholding ties no matter what she insisted.

    never break it off, no matter how many times she insisted she never wanted to talk to you again. just keep on persisting. there is a saying that goes "kindness kills." and what that means is that the more you are kind to someone, the more their heart softens towards you, even if they may dislike you strongly. so if you want you mum to speak to you and if you want to have a good relationship with her keep being kind to her even is she doesn't respond or even if she seems like she doesn't care. deep down she does, she just may not show it. so yes, just keep being nie to her, buy her things she like, do favors for her, and just generally do whatever you feel she likes (as long as it doesn't consist of disobedience to Allah).

    even if she reciprocates it with annoyance, etc dont let it bother you. how she acts towards you and how you react are 2 different things.

    having said that, be considerate and kind towards her with wisdom. so, for example, don't ring her when you know she is tired. or try be nice when she in angry. weigh everything and the possible consequence (good or bad) up and see what is the best thing to do and when.

    may allah soften your mothers heart towards you.
    Last edited by Ummu Sufyaan; 08-26-2010 at 06:50 AM.
    what to do

    ...desperate for husnul-khitaam...


    please make dua that Allah grants me a good end (to my life). please make dua that Allah guides me.

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