I've been called a terrorist because of my looks!!! Please Help!

[Jalal~]

Ugh, where to begin? I need some advice. A couple of years ago, I started to grow out my beard, but time and time again, my parents and peers have pressured me into shaving it, and I've given in a couple of times. Now for once, I've actually kept the beard for quite a while (7 months) and it hasn't grown out much, but nonetheless, it looks funky. Don't get me wrong, I actually don't mind having a beard (it's pretty nice and saves me from a lot of temptation) but both my parents and members from my community have related me to a terrorist.... Now i feel so bad for being called one, because I believe I am no where near this status, I'm just a regular Muslim trying to follow the obligations from my religion, but unfortunately, I get ridiculed more from my own people then I do from Non-Muslims.

Now more about my beard, I've definitely tried plenty of techniques to keep it organized and neat, such as combing and oiling and some of the other tips mentioned on other threads and websites, but it still looks awful. I've also found a link that talks about the ruling on having a scary looking beard on Islam QA, but it fails to provide a solution. I accept the fact that not shaving the beard and taking care of it is my obligation, but unfortunately, I cannot keep it tidy and I feel that I will be ridiculed for the rest of my life. I've lost my self confidence when talking to people because I end up worrying too much about what they think of my appearance and I can't even look them in the eye when speaking. I end up touching my beard so much and trying to comb it with my hand every time i walk past someone or have a conversation with them. As of now, I have no solutions...........

So what can I do? Please help me.

[Muslim Woman]

stop worrying about what people think of u . U will be rewarded for following the Sunnah ( some say it's wajib ).

So , think about the great day when u will get rewards for all the trouble u are going through now for keeping beard.

may Allah makes it easy for u .

[Jalal~]

I mean of course I don't mind keeping the beard, but what are some other practical ways of making it look nicer? Like I've said, combing and oiling are not enough for my small scruffy beard :/

[*charisma*]

Assalamu Alaikum

Beauty is truly in the eyes of the beholder. I think you're being a little paranoid and are a little self conscious of your beard. My husband's beard is thick and long and can get really scruffy and uneven, but I don't really care about it's appearance as much as I care about it's presence (:

As long as your beard is clean and combed, it's fine inshallah. I think most people don't draw their attention to the beard anyway unless you're bringing attention to it by showing your discomfort, because otherwise facial hair for men is natural.

When muslimah's wear the hijaab, shaytan tries to make them feel like it's plain or ugly, so they try to spruce it up by wearing makeup and beautifying it to the point where it receives attention. But which way do you think Allah loves more?

When muslims fast in ramadan, they may feel the need to chew gum or eat something because they have to work with nonMuslims and are afraid that their breath will affect their work. But doesn't Allah love the breath of a fasting person more?

keep reminding yourself of why you grew the beard and don't let your motives change. You pleased Allah, and that's enough. The people around you will have varying opinions and none of them will matter in the end.

fi aman allah
w'salaam