I am so tired all the time. I never sleep well thanks to the noise pollution from next door. I can't do a proper days work because I am always yawning and I am always tired.
When I come home from work, I sometimes want to have a little nap but that is not allowed because of the noise from next door.
Does anyone know of any duas that might work to re-energise me? Any foods or drinks I should consume to help?
You dont get enough sleep so your body is not functioning optimally. The answer is to make sure you can get some sleep. Imagine coming home from work and you dont get any peace because of the noise, it must be so tiring. Try telling your neighbours that you really need sleep and if possible for a specific duration can they reduce the noise.?
Can you perhaps catch a nap elsewhere, like a friend's home, or at the masjid?
The neighbours are not normal people. If we spoke to them about it, they would just make it even worse. We are not being awkard, we understand that sound is going to come through the walls and such like, but this is taking the biscuit. It's more or less non stop and I am getting sick of trying to sleep at night with ear phones in listening to some stupid music or birds chirping. I just want to get normal sleep, like go upstairs, say my duas and prayers and then be able to just fall asleep like a normal person and not be disturbed every twenty minutes by a door slam or someone drying their hair etc.
I do have a female friend and they have a spare room at their house. Her Mother said I can go and stay at theirs if I wanted and pay rent, but I am not sure if this is allowed? A man being in a house with two ghair mahrams? Do you think I should? Her Mother is quite Islamophobic. And there are no Mosques in that area so I wouldn't be able to pray but at least I would get some sleep.
Ok now I understand - that you have difficult neighbours - people you want to stay far away from, but unfortunately its not always possible. I can understand where your predicament comes from. As a suggestion, is it even possible for you to move to another place?
Staying in the same house with a woman where there is no mahram is not advised, and what makes it worse is that the mother is anti-Islam, which only makes life more difficult. Are there any other place or room that you can rent and use, other than this particular one? How about a muslim friend who can lend you some space, or even any other male for that matter?
Ok now I understand - that you have difficult neighbours - people you want to stay far away from, but unfortunately its not always possible. I can understand where your predicament comes from. As a suggestion, is it even possible for you to move to another place?
Thanks for your replies and suggestions.
At this moment in time, we are not financially able to move. And my Mom is keen on staying here (not sure why). I think it could be because her sister lives in the opposite street and a brother not too far from there.
I will keep trying your suggestions and hopefully one of these days something will happen.
As for moving anywhere else, I don't have any friends that could put me and I don't think they like the idea of me sofa surfing at theirs.
Sorry if I seem like a complete moaner who keeps moaning, but when this has been ongoing for such a long time, it takes over your life and it is so tiring. I know there are other people out there who are suffering much more than me and I am grateful to Allah that I am not in their place.
You'r welcome - and you'r welcome to say what you feel. It helps to unburden the soul and heart. May Allah give you ease and comfort and reward you for all your patience.
Your mom's sister lives nearby - which gives me another idea: could you not possibly use her place for relaxation and sleep, even if it means a couple of hours of proper sleep?
I know its not easy just moving out elsewhere, but if the opportunity arises then look into it, which Im sure you'r doing. Surely I understand that you dont want to pester others by just sleeping over, but you may be pleasantly surprised if you have just one friend who will do you a favour by letting you get some rest, now and then.
What your neighbours are doing is not right, as the rights of neighbours are highly emphasized in the ahadith. Are they muslims, btw?
The cheapest sound reduction material is the paper egg trays/ cartons. Usually lines the wall of the noisy side like a studio. Not so sure how it will function on the other side of the wall as the sound is not hitting it first and dispersing it. Plus, the sound may travel through the wall.
For old telephone books, you'll need a lot, taped up so book can't open and place them flat against the wall covering the entire wall. That will mute out the sound.
You'r welcome - and you'r welcome to say what you feel. It helps to unburden the soul and heart. May Allah give you ease and comfort and reward you for all your patience.
Your mom's sister lives nearby - which gives me another idea: could you not possibly use her place for relaxation and sleep, even if it means a couple of hours of proper sleep?
I know its not easy just moving out elsewhere, but if the opportunity arises then look into it, which Im sure you'r doing. Surely I understand that you dont want to pester others by just sleeping over, but you may be pleasantly surprised if you have just one friend who will do you a favour by letting you get some rest, now and then.
What your neighbours are doing is not right, as the rights of neighbours are highly emphasized in the ahadith. Are they muslims, btw?
Thanks for your kind words, I really do appreciate them, and thanks for taking time out to reply to me. May Allah bless you.
Mom's sister is lovely but she has dementia and her husband is also not well. It may sound like I am making excuses but they are no longer that close. They have a daughter and they were very interested in my brother getting married to her, but he married someone else and well there is bad blood there now. Uncles also had daughters they wanted my brother to marry, but he didn't marry any of them. I am Indian, and it's common that people will hold grudges until they die over marriage and things like that.
I rarely go to my auntie's house but when I do she weirds me out by saying things like "your Dad came over the day" when in fact he died about 7 years ago. And even if she did allow us to sleep there once in a while, there are 5 of us here, I doubt she would agree to that!
I look at Zoopla, RightMove, Local Properties etc every single day. You won't believe how keen I am in moving out. I will do 3 jobs in 1 day to try and finance it. I will sell my clothes and shoes too! I'm desperate to get away from here but it is not my time yet I guess. Everyone at work knows what is happening also, they also are on the lookout for properties for me and give me sound advice all the time. There is an old man at work and he has offered for me to go and stop at his if I wanted. His wife and daughter are OK with it. There is another man who has a 4 bedroomed house and he has a spare bedroom and has said I can go and stop over. But both of them drink a lot, both have dogs and it's just not for me I guess.
Yeah, the family next door are Muslims. The man comes to the Mosque a lot. He prays the Qura'an every morning really loudly! (I much prefer listening to the young boy who lives on the other side, he has a fabulous voice and prays really well). It really freaks me out that 99% of the sermons on Friday and when big scholars from other places come (Moulana Saleem Dhorat from Leicester, Moulana Fazlurrehman Azmi from Africa) are all about Huquqool Ibaad and how to respect others and treat neighbours/fellow members of the country etc, and the man from next door is always there but he still does not follow what he is told. The sermons are in English and Urdu and Gujerati so he has no excuse.
I don't know what their problem is. We have done nothing wrong to them. We are a quiet family, we mind our own business. Maybe that's where we are going wrong and we should become the scum of the Earth and then finally, Allah will like us and things will start going right for us. I don't know if I believe it or not, but the more I think about it, the more it makes sense.
It's my day off work today and I actually wish I was at work. I got woken up by the bedrooms being hoovered and then have been treated to a melee of door slams. Way too tired to go to the Mosque today. I could literally fall asleep on the streets, I am that tired!
About the sound proofing, I am a forum member on a few other sites (noisyneighbours.net amongst one of them) and I have had a discussion about sound proofing. Not only is it very costly, but it's not just walls that would need sound proofing but also floors and ceilings. This house has really thin walls, and noise travels not just through the walls but also through the floors. For instance, when the son and daughter in law wake up next door, they are in the attic. When they slam their wardrobe and bedrooms doors, the noise can be heard in my bedroom which is one floor down and also in the front room which is two floors down.
Ameen, and keep making dua for me, it is what I need; I make dua that Allah gives you strength and forbearance to overcome every difficulty.
I understand that you are not making excuses, but you have genuine reasons, and I trust that you'r looking into every possibility, as you have explained, in looking for another place to stay and so forth. Those of us who have it so easy must make abundant shukr to Allah swt; remember that your efforts will not go to waste, because even though you'r going through this stress and difficulty, there is reward for you by Allah.
Im sorry to hear about Mom's sister, - I wish ease upon her and the family. Thankfully you have a support system around you which helps you get through tough times. I guess going to the people who offered you place is not an option as they drink - and they can cause trouble for you because of that.
Sometimes its hard to believe that people behave in that way, and as you say he frequents the masjid but still. Thats true that good character and rights of others top the list in lectures and talks.
Have you tried speaking to him firmly about the noise they make? If you have then still do try another time, tell him how it affects you, maybe he'l listen this time.
Always remember that Allah loves you and everything happens for a purpose, so dont despair, things will come right insha'allah.
Does your workplace have a spot where you can even take a nap at break time? Im just thinking of another option.
Your house walls are very thin so the noise is amplified, and Im sure doing the sound proofing is a costly thing to do. But dont lose hope. I hope you feeling better today.
this is my way to avoid this
first thing ... is to ask allah to help u because he is competent for all the things
make a deep breath my way for this is to close your eyes and to start to thing in the miracles of allah in your body from your heart until the small finger in your feet
for example when you think about your hear imagine if you are hairless or think you dont have this
or this
think about all this things ... and say alhamdulillah from the deep of your heart
think about your eyes ... thanks allah for each color you can see when many people can't do this
think about your Eyebrows
And eyelashes
the glands Lacrimal adrenal glands
your Kidneys
Your lungs
your Aerobic
Your heart
Each blink of the eye
All the same without effort
Every heart accuracy
your Saliva
the Breath that you breathe every moment
Your skin
Gradually until your feet
and try to think about each idea that you know it about your body
that's will help you to worship allah before your nap
and try to do this as part of obedience
so you will take reward and also you will take your need also ....
say azkar an nawm
and say bismillah
all this will make you satisfied and calm and will give you the deep sleep so you won't care about the noisy
Marjoram in the morning brings activity
In the evening brings sleep
Regulates hormones
Chamomile relaxes the nerves which helps to deep sleep
But if you suffer from insomnia i will give you advice about it inshallah
may allah give you healiing
Caring Verses - Verses for Motivation and Recovery
In the Name of Allâh, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful
Selected Verses From The Qur’an as Translated by Abdullah Yusuf Ali (Prof. Dr. Rakmi Abd. Rahman) Author: Prof. Dr. Rakmi Abd. Rahman Publisher: A.S. Noordeen (2010) Pages: 342 Binding: Paperback Description from the publisher: Our time on Earth is temporary and full of challenges. The Quran has verses in various forms to help a person pass through his or her particular personal hardship. This humble book lists some of these caring verses. The main aim is to enable a troubled person to access the verse that he or she feels can help his or her situation or trouble, and to get relief from it. Such is human nature that sadness and the lows often come in stabs, and it should be able to easily access a caring verse at that point. Man’s time on earth, the earth’s time in the universe, and so on, are all part of the divine plan of the Creator, that only He knows. We humans are indeed just a small part of the whole creations, just servants bowing to the flow of events and time. The divine verses in the Quran indeed heal, comfort, motivate, and guide all aspects of life, and are freely available to all. Caring Verses just provides quicker access to them.
Pain and hardships allow you to grow spiritually Alhamdulilah so smile when a so called calamity befalls upon you.
Alhamdulilah Allah swt is the greatest.
Im sorry to hear about Mom's sister, - I wish ease upon her and the family. Thankfully you have a support system around you which helps you get through tough times. I guess going to the people who offered you place is not an option as they drink - and they can cause trouble for you because of that.
Sometimes its hard to believe that people behave in that way, and as you say he frequents the masjid but still. Thats true that good character and rights of others top the list in lectures and talks.
Have you tried speaking to him firmly about the noise they make? If you have then still do try another time, tell him how it affects you, maybe he'l listen this time.
Always remember that Allah loves you and everything happens for a purpose, so dont despair, things will come right insha'allah.
Your house walls are very thin so the noise is amplified, and Im sure doing the sound proofing is a costly thing to do. But dont lose hope. I hope you feeling better today.
Hi,
Thanks for your long response. Again, very much appreciated.
That's what I don't understand at all. The man from next door acts like an angel when he is in the Mosque. He holds the door until they close gently. If only he could do this at home as well. My Mom was nodding off in the front room today when the crazy man from next door slammed one of the doors so hard she jumped out of her seat and had to rush to the toilet. What does he get out of making a widow suffer like that? He no longer works and constantly thumps around slamming doors.
I wish not to speak to him or his family. They are a bunch of anti social vermin. Today I counted 100 plus door slams. I wonder how their doors and walls don't fall down with all that slamming and crashing?
Always remember that Allah loves you and everything happens for a purpose, so dont despair, things will come right insha'allah.
I wish I could believe the above sentence. It genuinely feels like we are being punished for something but I know not what. The way things are going, I may end up slitting my wrists. It feels like I am in hell already, day in day out, so maybe going to another hell won't be much difference! Sorry, I am just so frustrated and angry right now. I am a young 30 something. Each day I am sat worried about the beasts next door, I am getting older. I want to enjoy my life, do things I want to do, pray my Qadha etc, learn all my Hifz again. But no, each day I wake up tired and stressed out and then the day goes from bad to worse with the non stop noise. And then I worry about the next day. I know one of the kind sisters told me to be positive and think positive thoughts, but how can I when I know the next day is going to be the same or even worse than the day before.
Sorry, I am not taking it out on you, I am just so frustrated and tired, and now it's almost bed time so I am dreading the noise again.
Please pray for me tonight, maybe your prayers will get accepted.
this is my way to avoid this
first thing ... is to ask allah to help u because he is competent for all the things
make a deep breath my way for this is to close your eyes and to start to thing in the miracles of allah in your body from your heart until the small finger in your feet
all this will make you satisfied and calm and will give you the deep sleep so you won't care about the noisy
Marjoram in the morning brings activity
In the evening brings sleep
Regulates hormones
Chamomile relaxes the nerves which helps to deep sleep
But if you suffer from insomnia i will give you advice about it inshallah
may allah give you healiing
Hi auntie MM,
Thanks for your posts and your advice. I do pray from Allah every day. I pray loads of surahs like Yaseen, Haqqa, Kahf, Mulk, the 4 Cools every day along with a whole assortment of tasbeehs but nothing seems to happen. I've been praying for ages, I even cry when I pray, but still nothing.
Do you think my prayers are not being accepted because I am an evil person? Maybe this suffering is punishment because I am a nasty person? Or someone else in my family? By jove though, someone must be really evil and wicked to get punishment like this. It's non stop, all day, every day!
I drink chamomile tea as I have read up on it. Apparently passion fruit flower tea is also meant to be good but unsure where to buy it from. I have also bought a whole collection of chamomile and essential oil sprays and candles which I use in my room but they don't seem to work. Maybe because I am so anxious all the time? It's a never ending circle. I worry too much about when the noise will start again which makes me so anxious even little day to day activities become hard.
My 2 little nephews came to our house today. Poor children were so scared with the non stop slamming next door. They asked if a crazy person lived next door. I didn't answer. They then said they had read in their English kitaabs that if you are a naughty person and scare your neighbours, Allah won't like you. Again, I didn't know what to say.
I told them to say a little prayer for me and the others at home. I hope their prayer works. Please can you all pray for me too.
Thanks for reading my woes. And thanks to all for their advice.
Thanks for your posts and your advice. I do pray from Allah every day. I pray loads of surahs like Yaseen, Haqqa, Kahf, Mulk, the 4 Cools every day along with a whole assortment of tasbeehs but nothing seems to happen. I've been praying for ages, I even cry when I pray, but still nothing.
Do you think my prayers are not being accepted because I am an evil person? Maybe this suffering is punishment because I am a nasty person? Or someone else in my family? By jove though, someone must be really evil and wicked to get punishment like this. It's non stop, all day, every day!
I drink chamomile tea as I have read up on it. Apparently passion fruit flower tea is also meant to be good but unsure where to buy it from. I have also bought a whole collection of chamomile and essential oil sprays and candles which I use in my room but they don't seem to work. Maybe because I am so anxious all the time? It's a never ending circle. I worry too much about when the noise will start again which makes me so anxious even little day to day activities become hard.
My 2 little nephews came to our house today. Poor children were so scared with the non stop slamming next door. They asked if a crazy person lived next door. I didn't answer. They then said they had read in their English kitaabs that if you are a naughty person and scare your neighbours, Allah won't like you. Again, I didn't know what to say.
I told them to say a little prayer for me and the others at home. I hope their prayer works. Please can you all pray for me too.
Thanks for reading my woes. And thanks to all for their advice.
allah test us in our live to give us experience in our life ..so will be strong to live in easy way
and to make us realize ... remembering him to repent ... to see how we are weak and need him ... and to think more about our purpose in life
so think about this test as a gift from your lord to tell you
i am with you
i help you
dont forgive to ask me ... to worship me ...
and remember that holy hadith :
Anas (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:
Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, "Allah, the Exalted, has said: 'O son of adam, I forgive you as long as you pray to Me and hope for My forgiveness, whatever sins you have committed. O son of 'Adam, I do not care if your sins reach the height of the heaven, then you ask for my forgiveness, I would forgive you. O son of 'Adam, if you come to Me with an earth load of sins, and meet Me associating nothing to Me, I would match it with an earthload of forgiveness."'
[At- Tirmidhi].
Narrated Abu Sa`id Al-Khudri and Abu Huraira:
The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "No fatigue, nor disease, nor sorrow, nor sadness, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, even if it were the prick he receives from a thorn, but that Allah expiates some of his sins for that."
Sahih al-Bukhari 5641, 5642
may allah give you healing ... amen
allah test us in our live to give us experience in our life ..so will be strong to live in easy way
and to make us realize ... remembering him to repent ... to see how we are weak and need him ... and to think more about our purpose in life
so think about this test as a gift from your lord to tell you
Hi,
I know people keep saying it's a gift and a test, but I can't seem to believe it anymore. So Allah loves me so much he wants me to suffer day and night? Not only just me, but the rest of my family also? It just doesn't make sense at all.
It's a bit like me saying Mariyam I like you so much so I shall throw stones at you ever day. How does that make sense?
Maybe I have genuinely lost the plot.
My Mom asked me to take the week off work, so I did. It's been non stop door slamming next door. Yes, the two fully grown adult parents, day in day out. If they were approachable, I would have gone round and had a word, but from previous experience, we know that speaking to them will only make things even worse. I wonder what they get out of tormenting us? And I do wonder why Allah lets them get away with it. I wish they would get their comeuppance, they do deserve it.
PS. Still praying Yaseen and Al Haqqah as many times as I can, but not making any difference. Maybe I am so sinful that he simply doesn't want to help me?
I know people keep saying it's a gift and a test, but I can't seem to believe it anymore. So Allah loves me so much he wants me to suffer day and night? Not only just me, but the rest of my family also? It just doesn't make sense at all.
It's a bit like me saying Mariyam I like you so much so I shall throw stones at you ever day. How does that make sense?
Maybe I have genuinely lost the plot.
My Mom asked me to take the week off work, so I did. It's been non stop door slamming next door. Yes, the two fully grown adult parents, day in day out. If they were approachable, I would have gone round and had a word, but from previous experience, we know that speaking to them will only make things even worse. I wonder what they get out of tormenting us? And I do wonder why Allah lets them get away with it. I wish they would get their comeuppance, they do deserve it.
PS. Still praying Yaseen and Al Haqqah as many times as I can, but not making any difference. Maybe I am so sinful that he simply doesn't want to help me?
if i understand the reason of the noisy i think you're neighbours who make it
but my english doesn't help me to understand
but to say that allah want us to surfing
it isn't him
he may be give us testes to purify us and to remind us
but when we passed the test and get it all your suffering will go
some times we need some trouble to remember ... to learn ... and to be strong
in a period in my life i had more than 5 psychological disease and after two years i repent to allah ... i change my self
and i avoid all of them just with adkar ... hijama ... and surat al baqarah ... and reading more and more quran
in that time i feel allah in my life
and i know that i need him
and he gives me until i'm satisfied
alhamdulillah ... i get more happy ... and my life get great with him subhanallah
don't think of noisy ... don't think of the sleeping before
try to go to to sleep with many things to do
say to your self
if ii will not be able to sleep ... i will be able to say (( la ilah illa lah wahdahu la sharika lahu .. lahul mulku walahul lamdo wa huwa ala kulli shayin kadir ))
this will reward you
and will relax you
read ayatul kursi and the last two ayah of al baqarah
if you can listen to surah al baqarah in a headset
it has a lot of benifit to protect you from shaytan and relaxing
and be patience
all this trouble will end one day
and you will have to say alhamdulillah when you remember them
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