Aslamualaikum Brothers / Sisters
I need help and I really appreciate your advises.
I am suffering from the most dark time of my life. Over the past almost 3 weeks, I was having so many evil and dark thoughts about alot of things including Almighty Allah. This specially happens when I start my prayer and enter washroom, to this I have discussed with few Imaam and they have explained to me to me that its all Waswaas from devil. After that things go better.
Now for the past 2 days something most worst and evil is happening that In my head i am getting lot of shirk thoughts - all major and minor sort. I get angry very fast and when i am angry thought of things come to mind. Few days ago I was angry and lot of shirk thoughts came to heart and mind, its kind of thing which I don't have control over thoughts. I am too much worried that due to these thoughts about Allah and Shirk I may have ruined everything (nauzubillah). I am so much disturbed that I am even getting thoughts of end my life. Certain thoughts of shirk are so loud that I can't stand and these thoughts provokes lot of other thoughts.
I read that as long as thoughts are in head and heart only, its ok (we must ask forgiveness from Allah), but when someone do shirk verbally and start believing in these thoughts and start practicing then that is the end. Can someone explain what does it mean "do shirk verbally" ??
These thoughts I am getting are so painful that I can't stand them.
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Extreme Shirk thoughts and anger
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