Backbiting

[Bobbyflay23]

Ok so I know I've been posting on this website allot if for help I'm not trying to be a attension seeker but I have another question my dad was backbiting my aunt and I was with him so and I didn't stop it and I even believed it (it was mostly false) and now I realized it was technically backbiting and I want to apologize but my dad doesn't want her to find out but I don't care if she finds out so I want to ask her for forgiveness without causing drama because my dad says I'm not gonna forgive you if you cause a drama and you should just forget about it but I don't want to carry the weight of a major sin I have no clue how to fix this situation without my dad being mad at me and then also carrying the weight of a major sin

[Bobbyflay23]

Also I asked my dad to have a normal conversation about it and I didn't even attack him and he said that I'm overly religious and that it's drivin me insane everybody around me is negative to me being religious it's a different problem I always feel like a I might be a religious hypocrite and not know it even though I try so hard to be religous

[azc]

sharing the incident of back bitting of other with us is also back bitting

[Umm♥Layth]

sharing the incident of back bitting of other with us is also back bitting

Not sure this is very helpful to the OP.

[Bobbyflay23]

Yea but I didn't use my real name or anything to make the account so you guys don't know my dad unless you mean sharing it with my aunt?

[Alpha Dude]

Don't do it. There is no wisdom in exposing your father to your aunt like that. There is no benefit in it. See the following answer:

The correct view –and Allah knows best – is that he should not tell him that he has gossiped about him if he does not know; it is sufficient just to ask Allah for forgiveness for the sin and to ask for forgiveness for his brother to counteract the harm caused by his gossiping about him.

Read more...

In any case, if you really feel you have to tell, you have no reason to mention your father at all. You can only seek forgiveness on your own behalf, not your father's - so, you have no need to mention that you were backbiting with your father. You could just say 'I'm sorry, I talked about you behind your back and seek your forgiveness'. You don't need to mention what you talked about and who you talked to. But - really, it's not advised. You have no real need to tell her.

[Umm♥Layth]

Yea but I didn't use my real name or anything to make the account so you guys don't know my dad unless you mean sharing it with my aunt?

Oh, but we know who you are

[Supernova]

Ok so I know I've been posting on this website allot if for help I'm not trying to be a attension seeker but I have another question my dad was backbiting my aunt and I was with him so and I didn't stop it and I even believed it (it was mostly false) and now I realized it was technically backbiting and I want to apologize but my dad doesn't want her to find out but I don't care if she finds out so I want to ask her for forgiveness without causing drama because my dad says I'm not gonna forgive you if you cause a drama and you should just forget about it but I don't want to carry the weight of a major sin I have no clue how to fix this situation without my dad being mad at me and then also carrying the weight of a major sin

Asalaamualaykum
Dear brother in islam:

Please consider the following before going to your aunt:

1. The first thing you need to understand is the definition of backbiting. If you don't understand the Shari definition and explanation of backbiting then all actions to follow from yourself will be based on a misinformed base principal (in this case, backbiting) which in turn might lead to a greater Fitna. (in this case division & discourse in the family)

2. In certain cases whereby a Muslim regards the exposing of information as backbiting - you might be surprised to learn that depending on the situation it won't be considered as backbiting but rather it will hold the status of being wajib to actually expose that information.

You will only understand the wide spectrum of this commonly used term "backbiting" if you take time to speak to an scholar in great length.

So the precis of it is that if you don't know the Shari definition & explanation of backbiting then for you to act upon your fathers actions will be unjustified - simple because if you dont truly know the principal of the word it will logically mean that all actions to follow will be put to question. Simply put, if you dont know the difference between MPD & Schizophrenia (in psychology) then logically you can never diagnose a patient with either or.

Wasalaam.

[AbdurRahman.]

Bobby as others have advised, telling your aunt will only cause more harm; it can potentially cause a rift betyeen family which is a greater sin

so just leave it and repent; thats all you need to do!