Sometimes, I see horrible things which really bothers me. Recently, I have read accidently that some Romanians wants freedom from Islam, and some Romanian Muslim priests says to some boys that they are disbelievers. And that made me think that the way they want to Islamise Romania, is very bad. In my opinion, it should be done this in natural way that people wants to accept Islam without being forced, but some thats how they interpretate, and that is all because of ISIS who me feel insecure of myself as being a Muslim. And honestly, I dont find any divine laws and legislations that makes me happy and content, because I wished I could draw anything that goes in my mind, but the sharia does not let me to draw freely anything I want. I wished I could have God's Leave to pray for my dead Christian grandfather's forgiveness so that he can be rasied among the true Christian believers. But the Islamic sharia does not let me to do this, and I would feel horrible without him. And there are many others things I don't like because, I simply dont find something that I like, and I,desperately need reversal of time so that new divine laws and legislations can appear as I wished so that now I can be happy and content, but I have prayed for the time to be reversed before we reach 2019 because I dont want to be in examination periods of grade 12, because I kept failing in past and now I dont have self secure that I will pass this time, and I have also lost patience and faith because I did not get my dua be answered even now. Sometimes I even feel the need of becoming an athest because of this because sometimes I feel that I'm ignored by God, but I dont have the courage enouph to leave Islam, and I dont have the courage to violate God's laws as I want, I only imagine myself doing it. But have I done according my thoughts? No, because I dont want to deal with His Punishment. Sometimes, I even feel like says that some things in life have been made wrong, but I refrain myself from saying with mouth. Honestly, I hate this life because I did not expected to be like this. My mother keeps telling me that I can listen to songs because also the Muslims from the Prophet's time used to sing by using musical instruments because he announced that the message is completed.
What should I do if I have the thought and desire of leaving Islam because of not getting this Dua answered? Am I still a believer even if I have this kind of thoughts but still I did not do accordingly?? What should I do if I keep having this strong hatred towards life?
If you have a tank from which water is leaking through a tap, then the solution is not to mop up the water that has been leaked; rather the solution is to shut off the tap firmly, so as to stop the water leaking.
This is what is required of you now. It will not do you any good if you get an answer to the two minor issues mentioned in your question, because the train of thought will never stop, and the Shaytan’s tank of waswas is full and will never run out. Your tap is open, so when will those problems ever end?
The solution is to strive to put an end to that waswas, which can be achieved by doing two things:
1.
Seeking refuge with Allah, may He be exalted, from the accursed Shaytan, and constantly remembering Allah and reciting Quran, especially Soorat al-Fatihah, al-Baqarah, al-Mu‘awwidhat, and Ayat al-Kursiy, and doing that as much as you can.
Allah, may He be exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):
And if there comes to you from Satan an evil suggestion, then seek refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is the Hearing, the Knowing.-[Fussilat 41:36]
{And say, "My Lord, I seek refuge in You from the incitements of the devils,
And I seek refuge in You, my Lord, lest they be present with me."} [al-Mu’minoon 23:97-98].
The Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “I enjoin you to remember Allah, for the likeness thereof is that of a man who is hotly pursued by the enemy until, when he comes to a strong fortress, he barricades himself inside to protect himself from them. Similarly, a person cannot protect himself against the Shaytan except by remembering Allah.”Narrated by at-Tirmidhi (2863); classed as saheeh by al-Albani in Saheeh at-Tirmidhi.
2.
Ignoring that waswas completely and not thinking about it or focusing on it, and not looking for a solution or answer to it. That is what the Shaytan wants from you; he wants you to focus on his whispers so as to make your life miserable and spoil your religious commitment and worldly affairs.
The Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) summed up these two matters in a single hadith. When he was asked about some of these whispers that come to a person, he said: “let him seek refuge with Allah and stop (such thoughts).” Narrated by al-Bukhari (3276) and Muslim (134).-
If you have a tank from which water is leaking through a tap, then the solution is not to mop up the water that has been leaked; rather the solution is to shut off the tap firmly, so as to stop the water leaking.
This is what is required of you now. It will not do you any good if you get an answer to the two minor issues mentioned in your question, because the train of thought will never stop, and the Shaytan’s tank of waswas is full and will never run out. Your tap is open, so when will those problems ever end?
The solution is to strive to put an end to that waswas, which can be achieved by doing two things:
1.
Seeking refuge with Allah, may He be exalted, from the accursed Shaytan, and constantly remembering Allah and reciting Quran, especially Soorat al-Fatihah, al-Baqarah, al-Mu‘awwidhat, and Ayat al-Kursiy, and doing that as much as you can.
Allah, may He be exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):
And if there comes to you from Satan an evil suggestion, then seek refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is the Hearing, the Knowing.-[Fussilat 41:36]
{And say, "My Lord, I seek refuge in You from the incitements of the devils,
And I seek refuge in You, my Lord, lest they be present with me."} [al-Mu’minoon 23:97-98].
The Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “I enjoin you to remember Allah, for the likeness thereof is that of a man who is hotly pursued by the enemy until, when he comes to a strong fortress, he barricades himself inside to protect himself from them. Similarly, a person cannot protect himself against the Shaytan except by remembering Allah.”Narrated by at-Tirmidhi (2863); classed as saheeh by al-Albani in Saheeh at-Tirmidhi.
2.
Ignoring that waswas completely and not thinking about it or focusing on it, and not looking for a solution or answer to it. That is what the Shaytan wants from you; he wants you to focus on his whispers so as to make your life miserable and spoil your religious commitment and worldly affairs.
The Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) summed up these two matters in a single hadith. When he was asked about some of these whispers that come to a person, he said: “let him seek refuge with Allah and stop (such thoughts).” Narrated by al-Bukhari (3276) and Muslim (134).-
Ok, I'll do that. If I get protection from God, then thats mean I become closer to Him each day?
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