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UnWanted

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    Ameeratul Layl's Avatar Full Member
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    UnWanted

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    brothers and sisters,

    I did say that I were thinking of writing another story after 'Unveiled feelings' which can be found here:

    http://www.islamicboard.com/general-...eiled+feelings

    So, here is the new story. I must point out that this story has nothing to do with 'Unveiled feelings' and is completely different.

    I was very much inspired by a book I have been reading. A very old book with a very appealing form of writing. I have not yet completed my book but I had to put pen to paper and think of something just as appealing. So, here it is.

    I hope you enjoy it as I enjoy writing it every minute.

    Please note: Any comments that you wish to make for 'Unveiled feelings' must be in its respected thread.
    Any comments for 'Unwanted' should be in this thread.
    JazakAllah.


    Last edited by Ameeratul Layl; 07-26-2006 at 05:09 PM.
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    Ameeratul Layl's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted



    The leaves were wet and every now and again, they would latch to the front of his shoes. He kicked the leaves as far as he could, just as when he were a child. His hands were tightly held behind his back and at times, he would bring them forward to scratch his forehead. His smart suit showed off a tall figure and his golden hair adjusted the confident sparkle in his green eyes.
    He could not think of a better place to be than in the woods, but any minute now he felt his nerve almost rip. He wanted to cry.
    ' You see my dear son, I am now old and frail. I will be leaving everything in your name,' the old grey haired man clenched his jaw. One could almost sence the tears and sadness he too felt. He was a man of good name and was respected by all that lived in Howethwaite. His thin grey hair was not a atom out of space. A man of true perfection. The Dines had never spoke of the Will before, surely not in the open such as the woods. There was not a soul to be seen, all humans were expected to be huddled around the fire and all animals hidden away in their dens. The only noise to be heard was the cracking of the branches on the ground, as both father and son continued in their brisk walk.
    ' The windmill will be yours my son, but you must promise not to share it with another soul. Damn it, that James! He wanted to get his claws on it before I. James Florestte. He has had it in for me since then and I can tell you my son, he will be after you once my eyes are closed and my body six feet under ground, ' the old man looked rather red in the face. It was evident that this James Flourestte was not a man of liking.
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    Ameeratul Layl's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted



    Hasn't anyone read my story yet?


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    searchingsoul's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    format_quote Originally Posted by Ameeratul Layl View Post


    Hasn't anyone read my story yet?


    I did. It's not finished is it?
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    Ameeratul Layl's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    format_quote Originally Posted by searchingsoul View Post
    I did. It's not finished is it?

    No. But I expect it to be read as I go along. The comments will help me to polish anything I have not seen.

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    Re: UnWanted



    I've read it.. It sounds good..
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    Ameeratul Layl's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    format_quote Originally Posted by Umm Hamzah View Post


    I've read it.. It sounds good..

    JazakAllah sis.

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    lolwatever's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    sounds interstinggg so far.. i wonder where it's heading too.. keep us updated!
    salamz
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    Ameeratul Layl's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    format_quote Originally Posted by lolwatever View Post
    sounds interstinggg so far.. i wonder where it's heading too.. keep us updated!
    salamz



    I will do InshAllah. You just keep tuned.

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    Ayesha Rana's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    IT'S sooo COOOL!!! I love writing stories and before my GCSE's i spent most of my time doing so. Now it's mostly poetry but i still do stories. I love writing.
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    IbnAbdulHakim's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    mashAllah sis, thats quite descriptive, love the huddled around the fire animals gettin lost thing, i can imagine it mashAllah.


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    Ameeratul Layl's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    format_quote Originally Posted by Ayesha Rana View Post
    IT'S sooo COOOL!!! I love writing stories and before my GCSE's i spent most of my time doing so. Now it's mostly poetry but i still do stories. I love writing.

    JazakAllah Ukhti.


    format_quote Originally Posted by Mazed
    mashAllah sis, thats quite descriptive, love the huddled around the fire animals gettin lost thing, i can imagine it mashAllah.

    You can imagine it? Oh subhanAllah, that is the aim. I am glad you found it descriptive. I believe stories are better this way.
    JazakAllah.
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    Kittygyal's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    sounds cool
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    Umu 'Isa's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted


    masha Allah sis, sounds pretty good. You're very talented masha Allah
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    Ameeratul Layl's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    format_quote Originally Posted by islamgyal View Post
    sounds cool


    JazakAllah Ukhti.


    format_quote Originally Posted by Ladee_Maryam
    mmasha Allah sis, sounds pretty good. You're very talented masha Allah



    Talented? JazakAllah.

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    Ameeratul Layl's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted



    (Cont...)

    The young man made no response. His eyes pealed to the ground and his lips tighter. Frederick was a young man of great respect, just as his father. 'He will take after his father', people would say.' And one day, he will do us proud'. Indeed, Frederick the only lawyer that the people of Howethwaite could ever trust and was also equally respected as his father, Mr Dines.
    'Do you hear what I say?', Mr Dines burst.
    'Yes father,' Frederick replied calmly. His hands were now in his pockets and his face whiter than ever. The pink in his cheeks was no longer to be seen. The thought of enemies made him feel rather ill.
    The conversation regarding the Will went on for an hour and two, as did the long walk through the woods.

    ' Mr LongHutton called for you sir,' Alice curtseyed as she spoke. Her fiery red hair elaborated on her deep brown eyes, whilst her plump face portrayed the true beauty of her cherry cheeks and strawberry lips. She wore a white and blue dress. But as she was only a young one, she was not yet expected to wear a maid hat. In which in her opinion, was a great disadvantage.
    Frederick stood at the window, resting his right arm on the window sill and gazing admirably at the oak tree as it swayed so gently to the winds notion.
    ‘Very well,’ and with that, Alice left just as quietly as she had entered.
    Mr LongHutton was a doctor. He lived fifteen minutes away from Frederick but he inherited a stubborn character from both parents. He was no older than Frederick and but certainly less wise. Since his rise as a private doctor, Mr LongHutton seemed to have thrown himself onto the clouds. A character not to Frederick’s liking,

    The wind blew through the window and the papers that were sitting so neatly on the shiny black table were now covering the varnished brown floor. Frederick took no notice. His gaze fell was still resting on the oak tree that had now become stationary. He began thinking of what his father had said earlier, until.

    ‘Oh my Lord, I thought you were dead my dear, Frederick,’ Mr LongHotton shouted. Indeed, it were clear that even the humor of Mr LongHutton was not exactly the most appealing in the best of manner. Frederick pulled himself away from the windowsill and with great difficulty, held up a smile.

    ***End of Chapter One***

    Last edited by Ameeratul Layl; 07-27-2006 at 03:17 PM.
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    IbnAbdulHakim's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    sooooooo descriptive!!!!!!!!!!!! mashAllah
    UnWanted

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    yet i feel me and shaytan never part
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    Re: UnWanted

    format_quote Originally Posted by Mazed View Post
    sooooooo descriptive!!!!!!!!!!!! mashAllah
    Yes, very descriptive and well written.

    "cherry cheeks and strawberry lips"

    This makes me want such cheeks and lips!
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    Ameeratul Layl's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: UnWanted

    format_quote Originally Posted by Mazed View Post
    sooooooo descriptive!!!!!!!!!!!! mashAllah



    JazakAllah. I hope you enjoyed it.



    format_quote Originally Posted by searchingsoul
    Yes, very descriptive and well written.

    "cherry cheeks and strawberry lips"

    This makes me want such cheeks and lips!
    Peace

    I knew someone would make such a comment.
    I am glad you enjoyed it.

    Peace
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    Angel's Avatar Full Member
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    Smile Re: UnWanted

    format_quote Originally Posted by Ameeratul Layl View Post


    JazakAllah. I hope you enjoyed it.





    Peace

    I knew someone would make such a comment.
    I am glad you enjoyed it.

    Peace

    woow wat can i say sis ,u got a gift masha allah.
    and u share it with others thats more dan enough , cherish it well sis not every one can write as well as u ,and put such feelings and describtions to a story
    masha allah

    lookin forward to chapter 2
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