my dads died.... what can i do?

[Umm Khalid06]

Hello sister and brothers of Islam I am so depressed it is like my hole world has went down my father has died last Wednesday I was on holiday than the news has come and we had to fly back quickly.

my mothers gone mad blaming be for my dads death my hole family are against me saying things because am a Muslim and this would not have happened if it wasn’t for me. Am so depressed and I went to kill my self I went into a shelter home yesterday with my baby it is like this black hole in my life but what keeps me going is my baby and my legs am lost am going mental my dads funeral no one wanted me there I don’t know what to do . i feel sick the verry time i cry verry day that he was alife and thigs to get better

This is my worst year. I keep reading the Qur’an I feel like leaving Islam is the only option open for me. I can’t live a life without my dad he was normal nothing wrong with him he just died naturally. I now you cant leave Islam once you are one but what can I do .


he was the best i sometimes wish he was a muslim :'( what can i do whent to kill my self i feel lost

[lolwatever]

oh sis! soo sad to hear
please don't feel that! remember the prophet was in your situation too!!!

he lost his parents adn they wheren't muslim, and people went against him when his grandfather died, his uncle went against him for beign Muslim even on his grandfather deathbed

pleeease dont feel liek taht!! its a test from Allah!! be patient sis!!

don't commit suicide or antyhign coz you will get alot of punishment in hereafteR! be patient allah will reawrd you gereeatlly!!

also remember the prophet was accused of being the casue of death and fighting between his entire tribe, and he too felt sadened, but he kept patient!! its very normal to feel sad sis, but its shaytan who will try to make you give up your principles over that! remember Allah and askh im for strength and be strong inshalah!!!!! soooo sad to hear tho

all the best! take care salams hope u get better soon inshalah!!!

[M.B]

I would say that just pray to allah and pray ur salah make dua so that ur family becomes muslim.

[aakhirah]

Innaa lillaah wa innaa ilayi raaji'oon (To Allah we belong, and to Him we will return).

How can Islam be to blame for the death of your father! Don't listen to those who try to make you believe that. I know this is easier said than done, but this is a test for you and if you pass through it patiently then Insha-Allah you will gain the highest place in Paradise. And Allah is with the patient ones.

Remember, there can be no calamity worse than leaving Islam. Consult other Muslim sisters in your area; you need their support. All the Muslims are with you in this adversity and struggle. May Allah ease your suffering and make it a means of success for the Muslim Ummah.



A.

[S_87]

sister

im sorry to hear of the death of your dad but no matter what your family say you are in no way to be blamed for his death


كُلُّ نَفْسٍ ذَآئِقَةُ الْمَوْتِ

every soul shall have a taste of death
3:185

and you could not stop the death nor could you prolong it. this time was his appointed time, it was written he would die then.

if you kill yourself what would you achieve? are you willing to leave your child without a mum? if you would have killed her too are you willing to actually kill an innocent life? think about these things.
plus suicide is a way out for losers sister, and you will pay for it in the hereafter

remember Allah does not put a burden on a person more that he or she can cope and Allah tests one whom He loves. this sadness could be a test for you sister. if you are thinking bad thoughts like wanting to leave islam it could be thoughts from the shaytaan. pray Audhoo billahi minashaytaan nirajeem (i seek Allahs protection from the satan the accursed) and Amantu billahi wa bi Rusulihi (i believe in Allah and His messengers)


hang in there it will hurt your father passing away plus your family rejecting you, but Allah will never leave you and will always hear your call

وَقَالَ رَبُّكُمُ ادْعُونِي أَسْتَجِبْ لَكُمْ

And your Lord says: "Call on Me; I will answer your (Prayer)
40:60

[- Qatada -]

May Allaah make it easy for you sister and all the muslims, ameen.


Please remember that you love islam, and you have a bigger family - and that is all the muslim ummah.


There was a woman at the time of the Prophet (peace be upon him) - just when she became muslim, she got blind. This was a test from Allaah to see if she really wanted to follow the religion. But because she had become muslim - the people who worshipped the idols started saying to her that our idols cursed you, so you are blind.

She said no! i believe that Allaah is just testing me, so i am still a muslim. Just then - her eyesight got better again.


That really happened to a woman at the time of the Prophet (peace be upon him.) Allaah tests the person to see if they are serios about following the true religion or not. Everyone else will keep trying to tell you that you are on the wrong religion, and blame you - but remember that you have Allaah on your side.

So pray to Allaah to help you, and remember that this life is hard for a person whether they believe in Allaah or not, except the one who believes in Allaah - Allaah will help them and make things easier for them insha'Allaah.


You know that jannah (paradise) is real, and you know that hell is real. So if you leave the religion, you are putting yourself into danger. Remember that this life is only for a little while, and that jannah (paradise) is forever. insha'Allaah you will get there, and when you do - you can have all the fun you want, and your baby will be a good muslim in jannah with you too insha'Allaah!


Remember that Allaah will help you, just keep your trust and faith in Him and keep making lots of dua' (prayer) - we will do the same for you too insha'Allaah.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

SubhanAllah, sis mashAllah your very strong for putting up with this so far. But dont let the thought of suicide come into your mind because the one who commits suicide shall burn in hell forever doing that which he commited suicide with over and over again.

Also sis, your family will come round InshaAllah. Allah tests those who he loves the mosts and you are getting tested a lot. Have patience sis, when prophet Ayyub AS lost his wives, his 14 children, his palace, his health, he still said ALHAMDULLILAH (Praise be to Allah) because to Allah is all praise that Ayyub AS still had his religion. RELIGION sis is THE MOST important thing. What you got to realise is this dunya (world) isnt even a split milli second of the hereafter, so i say bare the burden and have patience and inshaAllah you will get the BEST of the highest heaven (JANNATUL FIRDAUS)





I pray things are made easier for you inshaAllah. Ameen

[Haji_usmaan]

Innaa lillaah wa innaa ilayi raaji'oon (To Allah we belong, and to Him we will return).
My sister in Islam

Have Sabr and have trust in Allah because if u hve trust in Allah, Allah will remeber u, in this case, the best u can do to relieve ur heart is to do Allah Zikr(remembering Allah), make dua, send Durood and salam to the prophetJust remember, if ur family is Kafar, are they goin to help on the Day of Judgement.
Take this Advice and Apply it, Insallah I will make dua 4 u.
Assalam

[Somalina]

~~salaam~

Inaalilaah wainaaileyhi raajicuun,,He want back to his creator
U will too,Ur baby will too,Ur family will too
Some ppl are blamed for causing heart attacks,blood pressure e.t.c,wat the blamers forget it the blamed dont have power watsoever,
The words IF ONLY is a great sin,U see ,the Will of Allah Must be accepted
lolwatever said it well,The Prophet is our best example,and remember almost all his children died b4 him
Patience is bitter but has sweet reward,try staying in a Mosque,for a while

[Umm Khalid06]

thank you all thanks for the story too. so are you saying verything that happents to us is a test But the pain is still there I don’t now how to get rid of it I try to pray and my due but I keep dreaming of him I every night.

[- Qatada -]

Sister, imagine it like this insha'Allaah.

People will be tested according to their level of imaan/faith - the Prophets have the most hardest tests, after them are the scholars - then it keeps going down according to the level of a persons faith. But Allaah azawajal never burdens a soul with more than it can bear.

If the person remains patient, and keeps his/her duty to Allaah - then they may get a higher level or rank in jannah/paradise.


If you don't understand what i mean - this may make it easier to understand insha'Allaahu ta'aala:

From the bottom, of the diagram - you can see that a person's level of emaan (faith) equals out to the form of test the person may have. So, if a person has low emaan (faith), then their test might not be that difficult compared to a person who has more emaan etc.

This is why the prophets had the most emaan (faith) and this is why the difficulty of their tests are of a level higher compared to a person with weaker faith.

But, because of their emaan (faith in Allaah) - it doesn't seem too difficult for them, but a person with that lower faith would not be able to bare it.


The people who have more emaan (faith) will be raised in status/rank in paradise, as long as they have tawaqul (keep their trust) in Allaah Almighty. They should also stay patient, and pray - because dua' (supplication) is one of the best weapons of the believer.


You might notice that our beloved Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) is right at the top of jannah/paradise - he (peace be upon him) has the highest rank in paradise because he had the most emaan, so he had the most hardest of trials/tests, and he (peace be upon him) kept his faith in Allaah. So, he (peace be upon him) will be in the highest rank of paradise insha'Allaahu ta'aala.

The same can be said about the prophets, then the sahabah (may Allaah be pleased with them) - then the scholars etc. Each equal to their level of faith in Allaah azawajal.


.. and Allaah Almighty knows best.

[bint_muhammed]

my father passed away when i was 13, and that was the most difficult time in my life! i used to cry everynight and i still do five years down the line but, someone told me that if you pray two nafal and bless it upon his soul he will benefit from it! as you being a muslim, the best thing you can do for him is pray, noone can take that away from you, its really hard and your probably feeling really lonely,especially when your family is blaming you fro it but remember after every night comes day! it probably seems impossible but the pain will wear off slowly, and every pain you suffer and stay patient and be gratefull to Allah swt the reward is unimaginable, so sis stay strong! if your are a true muslim nomatter what comes upon you will overcome it. a muslim heart is strong! hope you all the best and your in my prayers inshallah!

[- Qatada -]

Sister, please do keep making dua' and keep remembering Allaah.


Allaah says in the Qur'an:

Therefore remember Me, I will remember you. Give thanks to Me, and reject not Me. (2:152)

You should also read the story of how the Prophet (peace be upon him)'s uncle died as a non believer too.. his uncle who had supported him for a really long time;

The Year of Grief
http://www.allaahuakbar.net/muhammad/year_of_grief.htm


A brother in this forum has also been in the same situation as you, so you might want to read this thread to find out what people said to him insha'Allaah:

http://www.islamicboard.com/cyber-co...my-father.html



Please remember that you aren't alone, and whenever you remember Allaah - Allaah will remember you and if you stay patient, Allaah will help you through your hard time.


It's also important that you don't leave islam or commit suicide because Allaah says in the Qur'an:

..and for those who fear Allah, He will make their path easy. (65:4)

That is the Command of Allah, which He has sent down to you: and if any one fears Allah, He will remove his ills, from him, and will enlarge his reward. (65:5)

So don't try to displease Allaah by disobeying Him, but stay patient and remember Allaah alot. Because if you keep your trust in Allaah, and stay away from bad things (haraam things) - Allaah will find a way out for you from all these problems, and Allaah will make things easier for you.


Allaah says in the Qur'an:

'Truly with hardship comes ease' (94: 6);

'Allaah will assuredly appoint, after difficulty; easiness' (65:7);

'Allaah desires to lighten things for you, for the human being has been created weak' (94:28).

We will keep you in our prayers insha'Allaah.. and remember - as long as you remember Allaah, Allaah is remembering you, and He will help you if you stay patient insha'Allaah.



Allaah Almighty knows best.

[Umm Khalid06]

Sister, please do keep making dua' and keep remembering Allaah.


Allaah says in the Qur'an:

Therefore remember Me, I will remember you. Give thanks to Me, and reject not Me. (2:152)

You should also read the story of how the Prophet (peace be upon him)'s uncle died as a non believer too.. his uncle who had supported him for a really long time;

The Year of Grief
http://www.allaahuakbar.net/muhammad/year_of_grief.htm


A brother in this forum has also been in the same situation as you, so you might want to read this thread to find out what people said to him insha'Allaah:

http://www.islamicboard.com/cyber-co...my-father.html



Please remember that you aren't alone, and whenever you remember Allaah - Allaah will remember you and if you stay patient, Allaah will help you through your hard time.


It's also important that you don't leave islam or commit suicide because Allaah says in the Qur'an:

..and for those who fear Allah, He will make their path easy. (65:4)

That is the Command of Allah, which He has sent down to you: and if any one fears Allah, He will remove his ills, from him, and will enlarge his reward. (65:5)

So don't try to displease Allaah by disobeying Him, but stay patient and remember Allaah alot. Because if you keep your trust in Allaah, and stay away from bad things (haraam things) - Allaah will find a way out for you from all these problems, and Allaah will make things easier for you.


Allaah says in the Qur'an:

'Truly with hardship comes ease' (94: 6);

'Allaah will assuredly appoint, after difficulty; easiness' (65:7);

'Allaah desires to lighten things for you, for the human being has been created weak' (94:28).

We will keep you in our prayers insha'Allaah.. and remember - as long as you remember Allaah, Allaah is remembering you, and He will help you if you stay patient insha'Allaah.



Allaah Almighty knows best.

thank you brother it is really helping now.

[sameer]

Assalamu Alikum,
Sorry to hear about ure father and ure situtation at home.
But you have to realise that wheater u acepted islam or not....he would have died anyways.
Always remember that Allah is the best of planners and we cant imagine to know y he does this or that or even question it, cause in realiaty we only know what he allows us to. Also rememeber Allah created us and when he is ready for us...he will take us back no matter what...and nothing can stop it.
A muslim should always try to be in good spirits no matter what because he gave us the best gift ever...which is islam and allowed us to be muslim. he chose u to be a muslim, and though ure life maybe hard now...ure still more blessed than billions of ppl around the world, cause they are not muslims. And u know what? ure baby is more blessed than billions too, beacuse it was born to a muslim mother and will insha Allah have a better chance to be raised in a moral and righteous way.

Most of my family are hindu and my my mother converted when she married my father. He died when i was only 6 weeks old leaving my mother, me (6wks), my sister (7 yrs) and brother (13yrs). She was a house wife, but now had to go out and get a job to support us. Anyhow...if she had committed suicide who would have taken care of us? Maybe we would have gone with hindus and become hindus..then where would we be? we would have been lost. Alhumdillah we grew up in muslim homes (not really knowing how to practice islam at that time but we were still muslims). My hindu family have lots of problems with fighting amongs themsselves, family squabbles, unwed mothers etc. The only difference is that they never treated us bad and they helped and supported us our entire lives .etc but had we been left in their care...we probaly would be in the same situation as them.

Insha Allah ure family would come around and treat u better, and insha Allah they may accept islam one day, but for now, look at the blessings that Allah has givin u and keep strong and turn to Allah with ure problems cause He is the best of all helpers and as someone else said..look for a masjid to get some support from sisters. Surely u have all of our support here.

May Allah make it easy for u and ure child and grant u sustenance, comfort and strenght in this time of differculty. ameen

[Umm Khalid06]

thank you brother for your story but my dads always been there for me though the hard times and happy. it is so hard to see that i can't see him again am going to pull though i wish am trying

[Tania]

You have to raise your child. You can't die.
Avoid to talk with family a few days until everyone will calm down. You will see, they will feel ashamed because they blamed you.

[Umm Yoosuf]

Assalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb

lilly_rose please see my PM to you Insha Allah

[Snowflake]

Your post really saddened me sis. I pray Allah gives you peace in you heart and showers His Mercy on you in this difficult time. Time will heal my sweet sis. Accept your father's death as the will of Allah.

As our beloved Prophet taught us: "Innaa lillaahi maa akhathaa wa lillaahi maa A'taa, wa kullu shay-in 'indahoo li ajalin musammaa." This means: "To Allah belongs what He took, and to Him belongs what He gave. Everything is recorded with Him for an appointed term."

Nobody belongs to anyone, except Allah. We must not grudge Allah's decicion to take what is only His. Thank Allah for the wonderful times you shared with your father. Thank Him for the blessing of having had a father in your life. Read about our beloved Prophet whose father died several weeks before his blessed birth. Our trials and tribulations can never compare sis. Praise Allah and make duaa and Allah will bring peace to your heart inshaAllah.

What your family did was cruel. But they will answer for their doings. You know in your heart that leaving Islam is not the answer to your torment. If only you knew the rewards that await you for the suffering you are going through, that would surely make your pain easier to bear. Surely Allah will reward you for accepting His will without a grudge.

I am sorry your father died as a non muslim. I pray Allah makes this pain easy for you. But this pain is limited to this life sis. On the Day of Judgement, such will be the fear that even children of muslim parents and vice versa will only be worrying about their own final fate. This life is so fickle sis. And so temporary.

You wished to see your father accept Islam, that never happened. But now Allah has given you a beautiful healthy child to teach Islam to. If you leave Islam then how will that happen? Strive to make your child a good muslim as possible sis. InshaAllah the rewards and happiness you will gain will shadow any pain you have been through.

I will keep you in my duaas inshaAllah. May Allah give you peace and strength in this difficult time. Ameen.

I'm here if you want to talk.

*Love & hugz*

[Hisbul_Aziz]

Inalilahio waina elahi rajuune


Dear siter in is islam do not forget the haddith of the prophet

On the authority of Abdullah bin Abbas, who said : One day I was behind the prophet and he said to me: "Young man, I shall teach you some words [of advice] : Be mindful of Allah, and Allah will protect you. Be mindful of Allah, and you will find Him in front of you. If you ask, ask of Allah; if you seek help, seek help of Allah. Know that if the Nation were to gather together to benefit you with anything, it would benefit you only with something that Allah had already prescribed for you, and that if they gather together to harm you with anything, they would harm you only with something Allah had already prescribed for you. The pens have been lifted and the pages have dried."