Let us all remember the hadith:
"Whoever of you sees wrong being committed, let him change it with his hand (i.e. by force). If he is unable to do that, then with his tongue, and if he is unable to do that, then with his heart.
And enjoin all that is right, and forbid all that is wrong, and be patient in the face of that which afflicts you, verily, that is the most upright of positions.Qur'an 31/17.
Three things are absolutely essential when you want to enjoin right and forbid wrong: knowledge, compassion, and patience. Knowledge is required before enjoining right and forbidding wrong, compassion is required during its practice, and patience is required after it.
I understand Glo how you must have felt vulnerable and I think its a great thing that if the boys were in some way stimulated by you , that you are uncomfortable with this. How many girls in todays society would be secretly proud and pleased with themselves that they managed to have such an effect. You just got kudos in my opinion.
If it was a separate incident, then who knows why did it. Allahu ahlam. Maybe he had been fighting the urge for ages and who said he bought one? At the end of it, if he managed to avoid buying one and turned away from the shelf, then he also stopped himself doing a bad deed..which is itself a good deed.
Personally it frustrates me so much when I see clearly identifiable Muslims acting in ways which are clearly not Islamic. I have sympathy for such people but it also causes me to be embarrassed. I also do such things myself estaghfirullah and i do believe it brings shame on the Ummah. I often feel shame for the things I did because I know its making Muslims look bad.
It also makes Muslims have to defend Islam and my practise of it more strongly. For example, my family always put examples of muslims not wearing hijab in front of me and ask me why I have to be so strict about it when clearly there are thousands of muslims not wearing it. Or having girlfriends is another one. They often say 'such people are not practising'. My only response can be we all sin different ways and do Christians always practise their faith exceptionally well? And of course not to judge Islam by the Muslims.
One particular thing that frustrated me in the past was on a trip to London I visited Edgeware Road, a big Arabic (and therefore Muslim) population is there and its very like being in Luxor to me. However along the road are various phone boxes and in such glass phone boxes are clearly visible business cards of naked women (head to foot) in provocative positions. Hundreds of them sellotaped beside the phone. I said 'why do the Muslims who live here not remove them?' . I still dont know why not and i try to think of all kinds of reasons.
If I was doing something wrong and some Muslim tapped me on the shoulder and reminded me gently or even harshly, I think I would feel defensive and react a bit badly. But I would be happy later because that person helped me to stay away from sin and I would fear doing such a thing again.
In saying that many muslims react really badly to any words of reminder, and feel that the person is condescending and patronising and judging them. Its hard to know what to do. I myself often feel bad that I didnt remind someone gently of something.
I think the sahaba would have reminded each other but they also had high enough iman to take it and be grateful about it. Not sure we have that today.
But fair dues to you Glo for the desire to say something, I hope God rewards you at least for that inshaAllah.
salam
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