A few questions here

[faithandpeace]

Assalamu alaikum everyone,

So I've now been Muslim for four months and I know that Islam is the truth and the path to follow. But I have a few questions on some things that have come up during these four months I'd like to go over. First, I have two fasting days that need to be made up. Insha'Allah the rest of Ramadan will be easy for me and not require any more days to be made up. My body is much better adjusted now to fasting, alhamdulillah. My understanding is that they need to be made up anytime between the end of this Ramadan and the beginning of the next one but not on Eid. I would rather not procrastinate and heard it was the tradition of the Prophet (saw) to fast on Mondays and Thursdays. So I was going to make these up the first Monday and Thursday following Eid insha'Allah. Is it better to do it sooner rather than later or does it matter? Also, do I need to follow the original times of the missed days for suhoor and iftar or go off of the Fajr/Maghrib times of the days in which I do the make-up fasts or whichever is more stringent? The days are getting slightly shorter now but I want to do the fast the same as I would have done it had I been able to do it on those days.

Second, I understand Zakat al-Fitr and insha'Allah will pay that to my local masjid soon (hopefully within the next few days) but when is Zakat al-Mal due?

Third, hijab seems to be a bit of a challenge. I have a bunch of them, a couple of abayas, and a few Middle Eastern/South Asian clothes. I just don't feel like I'm getting the hang of it yet though because I'm always having to mess with my hijab and fix it periodically after I have worn it for awhile. The back of it often wants to come up exposing my neck and even the front of it sometimes will come up despite even pinning it fairly tight. Youtube videos make it look easy and some of the sisters have helped me with it but it still seems challenging. I'm gravitating more and more towards Middle Eastern/South Asian dress in general as I enjoy the clothing styles better and it is more suitable Islamic wear than Western clothes as so many Western clothes have the necklines way too low and are too form-fitting. Any tips or links to good pictures/videos/descriptions that I can follow will be a big help.

Fourth, I'm starting to develop some social issues with non-Muslim friends whom I have been friends with long before I became Muslim. However, there seems to be a gradual separation occuring between me and some of them because our lifestyles are becoming increasingly different. I don't want to come across as judgmental or cynical of them but I have become more sensitive since my conversion to their habits and lifestyle. I am certainly not the perfect Muslimah or anywhere near it but I am trying to improve my character. I used to not mind some things as much such as friends' gossiping all the time, drinking too much alcohol, making inappropriate jokes, too obsessed with materialistic/secular things, etc. Now it is starting to bother me because while I don't think I'm condemning them I feel I'm not getting the support I need anymore. There is this one friend whom I have repeatedly made clear that I do not drink alcohol anymore who will not stop trying to get me to have a drink each time I'm around them. Does anyone have any thoughts on this? It can become a bit hard to adjust when you are trying to live a healthier lifestyle and some of those around you just don't want to support you. Some people have already been removed from my life but I still try to avoid losing friends if I can.

Jazakallah khair for any advice.

 

[Muslim Woman]

do I need to follow the original times of the missed days for suhoor and iftar or go off of the Fajr/Maghrib times of the days in which I do the make-up fasts

U have to follow the time of day u will fast.

 

[Muslim Woman]

[h=1]Fatwas on `Eid and Zakat-ul-Fitr from IslamiCity[/h]http://islamonline.net/

Question: Dear respected Imam. How much is Zakat Al-Fitr for each individual? Answer: Dear Br. As-Salamu Alaykum. Regarding your question, Zakatul Fitr is calculated in each country according to the cost of a meal and to the currency. In the United States, the equivalent of $5 dollars is more than enough. A 5-10 pound bag of rice for few dollars suffices. Usually, check with your local Islamic Center about the appropriate value. If you don't know someone who qualifies to receive the Zakatul Fitr, your Islamic Center also should help out. Thank you for asking and we hope to be able to serve you more efficiently in the future. And Allah knows best. Question: Is it true that we should pay Zakatul-Fitr in the place where we have sighted the moon of Shawwal? Many of us expatriates arrange for that Zakah to be paid in our home countries. One reason why we do that is because we cannot identify genuine beneficiaries of Zakah here. Back home, there are many poor and needy people. Is it acceptable if we send our Zakah to be paid to its beneficiaries back home? Answer: It is normal procedure to pay Zakah where one lives. If you are normally resident in this country, you should pay Zakah here. However, there are many cases where expatriates work in a well off country. It is difficult to find poor people who suffer from poverty. In such a situation, there is no harm in sending your Zakah to be paid in your home country, provided you are pretty certain that the poor of the place you live can be easily looked after. This is not a case which applies to Saudi Arabia and Gulf countries, but many Muslims living in Europe or America also do likewise. Question: If you cannot pray Salat al-Fitr on time, do you have to make it up the next day? Answer: Dear Br. M.Y.: As-Salamu Aalaykum. According to Imam Shafi`i, yes, it is permissible to perform it later as (Qada’) at any time either alone or within a Jama`ah because it is a Nafilah (optional/extra/supererogatory) and all prayers of this kind can be made up. Thank you for asking and God knows best.

http://www.islamawareness.net/Eid/eid_fatwa001.html

 

[Muslim Woman]

Differences between Zakat al-Fitr and Zakat al-Mal


Zakat al-mal is related to the saved money, whereas zakat al-fitr is paid by the head of the household on behalf of the family members. Also, zakat al-mal is to be paid when the savings reach the prescribed nisab (minimum amount on which zakah is due), but zakat al-fitr is to be paid by the person who has food for one day. The two categories vary in the amount required for each.


Responding to the question, Dr. Muhammad Ahmad Al-Musayyar, Professor of Islamic Creed, Faculty of Theology at Al-Azhar University, states the following:

The Muslim should thank Allah for the gifts He bestowed upon him and cooperate with the people and share them in their feelings. So he must pay the zakah, lend to the needy, and help in charitable projects in order not to receive the punishment stated in the Qur’anic verse: (And there are those who bury gold and silver and spend it not in the Way of Allah: announce unto them a most grievous penalty. On the Day when heat will be produced out of that (wealth) in the fire of Hell, and with it will be branded their foreheads, their flanks, and their backs, "This is the (treasure) which ye buried for yourselves: taste ye, then, the (treasures) ye buried!) (At-Tawbah: 34-35)


There are essential differences between zakat al-mal and zakat al-fitr.


Zakat al-mal relates, as its name implies, to the saved money; however, zakat al-fitr is paid by the head of the household on behalf of the family members. Also zakat al-mal is to be paid when the savings reach the prescribed value, which is equal to 20 mithqals of gold and 200 dirhams of silver. There is no fixed nisab for zakat al-fitr, but it is to paid by the person who has one day's meals and the members of his family on the eve of `Eid Al-Fitr. Besides, zakat al-mal can be paid at any time of the year as long as the nisab remains in one’s possession for one year. Zakat al-fitr must be paid by the person who witnesses part of the month of Ramadan and part of the month of Shawwal.


On the other hand, the amount of zakt al-mal is a fourth of a tenth, i.e., 2.5 per cent of one’s wealth. But the amount of zakat al-fitr is two qadahs (an old measure) of rice or wheat or other usual food known in the area or their equivalent.


The evidence of the above is the hadith recorded in the two authentic books of Hadith (namely Al-Bukhari and Muslim), and reported by Ibn `Umar (may Allah be pleased with him): "The Messenger of Allah (may peace and blessings be upon him) prescribed zakat al-fitr as one saa` (an old measurement) of dates or wheat on every person whether male or female from among the Muslims." In another authentic hadith, the Messenger of Allah is reported to have ordered that zakat al-fitr be paid out before going to the `Eid Prayer.


This is done with a view to make all Muslims feel happy in that day.
It goes without saying that zakat al-mal expresses the state of richness and satisfaction of the person who gives the zakah, as it is to be paid by the well-to-do people. On the contrary, zakat al-fitr must be paid by both the rich and poor. Therefore, the poor should pay the zakah on behalf of his household in order to make him pay the zakah as he used to receive it from the rich. In addition, the purpose of the poor paying zakat al-fitr is to help them get the reward promised by Allah for zakah on an equal footing with the rich. This, in turn, is to encourage them and honor their dignity. This is considered a great wisdom that cannot be found in any other religion or man-made system.




Allah Almighty knows best.

http://www.onislam.net/english/ask-the-scholar/acts-of-worship/zakah/zakat-ul-fitr/169779-differences-between-zakat-al-fitr-and-zakat-al-mal.html

​

 

[~Zaria~]

sister,

Alhamdulillah, Im soo very happy that Allah (subhanawataála) has guided you towards this beautiful deen, and that you are so keen on practicing upon all that you have learnt. MashaAllah. May Allah make it easy on you and bless you with even more, in both this world and the aakhirah. Ameen.

I will just try to respond to your second 2 queries in shaa Allah.

Assalamu alaikum everyone,

Third, hijab seems to be a bit of a challenge. I have a bunch of them, a couple of abayas, and a few Middle Eastern/South Asian clothes. I just don't feel like I'm getting the hang of it yet though because I'm always having to mess with my hijab and fix it periodically after I have worn it for awhile. The back of it often wants to come up exposing my neck and even the front of it sometimes will come up despite even pinning it fairly tight. Youtube videos make it look easy and some of the sisters have helped me with it but it still seems challenging. I'm gravitating more and more towards Middle Eastern/South Asian dress in general as I enjoy the clothing styles better and it is more suitable Islamic wear than Western clothes as so many Western clothes have the necklines way too low and are too form-fitting. Any tips or links to good pictures/videos/descriptions that I can follow will be a big help.

One way of avoiding your hijab from coming loose during the day is to wear an under-scarf, which looks like this:

^ These are useful as they prevent the scarf from sliding off your head/ hair, and if you have long hair, then it helps to keep your hair neatly in place under your hijab.
Just ensure that it is not tied very tight, and that it is tied above your ears (not below them, as shown in the picture) - else it will give you a headache in this way.
They can be purchased at most shops that sell hijabs/ abayas or on-line (or if you are good at sewing, then you can try to make it yourself in shaa Allah : ) )

Fourth, I'm starting to develop some social issues with non-Muslim friends whom I have been friends with long before I became Muslim. However, there seems to be a gradual separation occuring between me and some of them because our lifestyles are becoming increasingly different. I don't want to come across as judgmental or cynical of them but I have become more sensitive since my conversion to their habits and lifestyle. I am certainly not the perfect Muslimah or anywhere near it but I am trying to improve my character. I used to not mind some things as much such as friends' gossiping all the time, drinking too much alcohol, making inappropriate jokes, too obsessed with materialistic/secular things, etc. Now it is starting to bother me because while I don't think I'm condemning them I feel I'm not getting the support I need anymore. There is this one friend whom I have repeatedly made clear that I do not drink alcohol anymore who will not stop trying to get me to have a drink each time I'm around them. Does anyone have any thoughts on this? It can become a bit hard to adjust when you are trying to live a healthier lifestyle and some of those around you just don't want to support you. Some people have already been removed from my life but I still try to avoid losing friends if I can.

Jazakallah khair for any advice.

The following article may be helpful for you in shaa Allah, in explaining why keeping good company is so important for us:

http://www.missionislam.com/knowledge/Friendship.htm



I hope that you are having a rewarding Ramadaan in shaa Allah

Please do not hesitate to ask of us, if you have any other queries.

BarakAllahu feekum

 

[faithandpeace]

Jazakallah khair everyone for the help. InshaAllah I will implement as much of this advice as I can. I do wear underscarves with hijab but I think the problem may be how I'm pinning it. I tried something different where I put the hijab on the inside of my abaya vs. the outside of it and it did stay in place much better. I am so used to playing with my hair all the time that now I have the equally bad habit of fiddling with hijab too much which probably makes a lot of this worse.

I paid my Zakat ul-Fitr but not Zakat ul-Mal. I'll have to caculate it and see if it is obligatory for me or not. As to Ramadan inshaAllah I'll make those two days up soon and in accordance with Fajr/Maghrib times for the days I choose to make them up.

The social issues are what is bothering me the most right now. I've only been Muslim for four months and yet I feel like I'm being attacked from every direction and in danger of losing everything. I feel ever more confident I made the right decision and know that my imaan is strong right now although my practice is still a bit weak as I'm still learning. As I've been dressing more Islamically, my co-workers have stopped talking to me, my neighbors are treating me with suspicion, and many of my non-Muslim friends are disappearing. I'm usually quick to admit if I've done or believe I've done something wrong but I know for a fact I have done nothing wrong. Regardless, people act like they are threatened by me. If I were to come home drunk or stoned, it is unlikely my neighbors would care. My co-workers are content discussing on a daily basis their immersion in pop culture and consumerism. Many of my non-Muslim friends have stated they do not want me to dress Islamically, want me to drink liquor and go gambling with them, and talk openly about sex. The problem is that ultimately I know I am doing the right thing by living a new and healthy lifestyle and ridding myself of poor association, bad company, and unhealthy environments but it is becoming a bit sad and frightening to a degree as well because I see the danger of becoming very lonely at least for a time. I have Allah (swt) in my life and think about Allah (swt) throughout the day and even occasionally in my dreams while sleeping but it can be frightening when doing such a drastic life change.

The problem is that I feel like much of what I'm going through is one-sided and not balanced. I couldn't care less if people want to drink alcohol or gamble. They aren't Muslim and haven't accepted Islam to be bound by those rules. I'm not going to tell them not to eat pork products because it isn't required of them. Yet I don't feel I'm being offered the same courtesy. I'm being made to feel guilty because I'd rather talk about intellectual things at a restaurant rather than casinos and mixed drinks or relationship dramas. Maybe my co-workers think there is something wrong with me or that I'm avoiding them. I have not been rude to them but I have nothing in common with them. I'm not interested in what they are interested in. The last time I tried to talk about intellectual things such as current events in our society, hobbies, books, etc. they showed no interest and became hostile. Their interest is sports, celebrities, and gossip. Oddly, neighbors who have never bothered to say "Hi" to me before suddenly now want to know who the new Muslim on the block is. Yet the questions and comments by them are negative and hostile. I am friendly, open, and honest about my decision and non-judgmental. One lady insulted my intelligence trying to tell me that I'm not really a Muslim and that it must be a church I'm going to and not a mosque as she obviously couldn't understand why someone would convert to Islam. A man asked me if I became Muslim and when I told him so, he asked if I was going to be a "normal Muslim" or a terrorist. Then more recently a woman interrupted me while I was getting the mail while standing about 20 feet/6 metres away as if she didn't want to get too near me loudly exclaiming, "You're all covered up. Are you cold or something?" I knew I was being baited and she knew well why I was wearing what I was wearing so I declined to answer her, ignored her, and walked away.

On the bright side I have gotten treated very nicely and with compliments mostly from staff in stores, restaurants, business establishments, etc. where I frequent. But all in all, it really is getting tiring and overwhelming. I know that this life is a test. I have faith that Allah (swt) will help me overcome these obsticles right now but lately it has really weakened me so that my mind is tired all the time on top of being physically tired from the fasting. I have found nothing but wonderful experiences from the masjid I frequent and met some amazing sisters there. I never intended to create an "us and them" mentality that I'm aware of when I became Muslim against the non-Muslims but I feel like they have been the ones who have created this against me. If I'm not shoving Islam down their throats then they shouldn't be shoving liquor and nonsense down mine.

It all just seems really bizarre to me. I don't care how people live their lives or what their faith is but obviously much of our society (or at least the environments I'm in) seem to be very concerned about how I live my life. I appreciate the link about friendship in Islam. InshaAllah I'll look at it in more detail. I hope everyone is enjoying the last 10 days of Ramadaan and may you all become most fulfilled in imaan through it and closer to Allah (swt) as a result. Ameen.

 

[greenhill]

Salaam to you,

I have read similar stories to what you have detailed above. "Lonely in a crowd" is one of the articles in here. I have also seen people being abandoned by all and left alone because of their conversion/reversion to islam. Is is really a sad situation.

The bottom line is that islam is a really misunderstood religion. Only because of the skew people 'harp' on and never seem to want to let go. It eventually becomes so deep rooted that they cannot accept the truth anymore.

It is probably natural for them to believe that you have changed (which technically you have) not as a person but on what matters to you. As a result, you will be alone in your endeavors and will be spending most of your time going against the flow, so to speak. It will be tiring, it will be de-motivating and a lonely journey.

“Do you think that you will find your way to Paradise without experiencing the kind of suffering others have experienced before you? Distress and afflictions battered them until the Messenger and the believers sadly said, 'When will Allah send help?' Certainly Allah's help is near”. ( 2:214)

The above infers that even the prophet (pbuh) was tested. Hopefully you will feel not so alone in facing the trials knowing this.

Peace to you. :shade:

 

[Nur Student]

Peace and blessings be upon you Sister!

Be patient and continue on what you know to be the right path. Don't forget, Allah is always together with us. May Allah help you and all the reverts in your position.

I congratulate you and appreciate your resolution.