accepting apologies

[anonymous]

okay, so someone (maybe a sis, etc) who hurts you and realizes, apologizes yh. but you only accept because you know that they're gonna feel burden carrying the guilt around (and you dont want that for them, or for anyone), but in your heart your still hurt and its not really easy for you to forgve people. so what do you do? because now youve basically lied to them :-[

how do you have a softer heart and forgive people?

 

[Re.TiReD]

Lol this sounds kinda familiar to me.

To be honest, I'd like to know that a person had sincerely forgiven me 100%, but if they hadnt then thats a diff matter. Which is why I would forgive - only because I'd want others to do the same.

You dont have to forget, just forgive and accept that everybody makes mistakes and can say things without thinking and without setting out to hurt you. Things do happen unintentionally sometimes

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

i dunno why but it doesnt bother me if a person has forgiven me or not entirely, because if ive sincerely repented, and ive asked that person for forgiveness, and that person has said i am forgiven. THen to me i am ok with Allaah. If that person however did not mean it then, i meant my apology and that persons acceptance was sincere in my perspective (sp?)

so i wouldnt worry too much "THREAD OPENER" if i was you, you will end up totally forgiving said person over time.


you know i remember when i was younger whenever anyone would do anything bad our parents would make us do "bezu" ;D which is you touch the feet of the one you wronged and ask forgiveness OR you can grab your ears and sit up and down 20 times ;D ! either way its such an ice breaker because both the offended and offendee start cracking up and end up playing games together later