Advice on Life

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Jannah98

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Assalamualaikum brothers and sisters.

I need advice in life and what should I do with it.

But first, about me. I live in the USA, 18 and I'm married. I currently live with my mom and little brother. I am from Bangladesh, and I am a Muslim.
Throughout all my life, I was told to listen to your parent. I have nothing against that. I did listen to them.

I'm always listening to them, and I don't feel happy. Honestly, I have to give everything up. My dream career. I wanted to become a Artist. I love painting landscape, and flowers. But I have to give it up, and I ended up not going to my dream college. My mother said its "Haram". BUT I CHECK SO MANY WEBSITES ABOUT ISLAM AND ARTS! Islam has a lot of arts. I am only painting LANDSCAPE and FLOWERS. Is that Bad?

And since I turned 18 I am trying to apply for citizenship to bring my husband here. I honestly don't want to waste almost $800 for this. Is it to bring him quick to the USA. I honestly don't care. If I bring him here that I'll have to get pregnant ASAP. I want to live life to the fullest, by that I mean have a job that pays decent amount. Since I have given up on my dream college and I don't want to become your local "Doctor, Lawyer, Engineer".

I honestly just want to Me! I want to show people my stories. I want to draw and write.



Basically I don't know what to do with my life. I can't be "Me" because of my mom. I'm lost.





P.S I also asked Non-Muslim for advice; they all gave me basically that same answer:

"Your 18, you're an adult"
 
Wa'alaykum Salam

When you married him did you expect to leave him living back there whilst you yourself live in the US? It goes without saying that it costs money to being a spouse over so not sure why you wouldn't want to.

As as for the starting a family straight away, that is something you need to discuss with your husband. Who says you can't live life to the fullest AND be married? If anything you might find it easier to do what you've always wanted to even if it's just as a hobby and not as a profession. Your husband is your other half, a confidante, supporter and best friend, inShaAllah he will support you in doing whatever you choose.

But for now, you married the guy and you both have rights upon one another, if calling him over is the next expected step then be happy and focus on getting it sorted. May Allah grant you both a happy married life, ameen
 
Wa alaikum salam sister,

Try discussing your problem with your husband and see what he suggests.

There is nothing wrong in art as you have described. It is relaxing for the mind.
 
Hmm basically sis your an adult and your married now, I know you have to respect your parents and treat them kind and listen to them but no one can force you to do stuff you don't want to do. Your not committing any sin by wanting to do a course or degree in art and I completely agree with your comment about it wanting to lose yourself. Your still so young sis but maybe try talking to your mom and exposing it gently that it's not a sin, maybe get in touch with a sheikh about your situation and ask for practical Islamic advice. I'm sorry you feel this way and I truly feel for you. Seems like you got married kinda young and you weren't mentally prepared for it. I pray that Allah grants you a happy and successful marriage and grant you courage to move forward Ameen
 
Wa alaikumus salaam

It's perfectly allowed in Islam to paint landscapes and inanimate objects. Your parents seem to be stifling you and it seems it's within their "cultural" rights to do so. Present a few ahadith to them explaining that the prohibition on painting only applies to animate objects and they should give you room to grow - all within the boundaries of Islam.
 

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