Angry at God, Having a hard time in life :(

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Salam I don't really know how to put this, but here goes. For the last year i have really been struggleing, Emotionaly, spirtually and financialy and every other way. Im not the worst person in the world but i am not without my faults. I see people around me with good jobs, friends, family, some who deserve what they have, I friends who have amazing jobs and grow drugs at the same time. The only reall person who i look up to and would do anything for is my mum, she is without a doubt my best friend, and someone whome i love more than anything. And the problem i have is, I keep applying for jobs, and going to interviews and nothing ever works out for me. My mum always prays for me before every interview, and all i want is a job so i can make my mum happy, I have worked since i was 16 ( now 27 ) but i quit my job fpr reasons below. The other day i got a call rejecting me for a job i had applied for. It didn't bother me too much as it was just another rejection. But when i told my mum she was disapointed ( not at me at the situation, she really wants me to get a job, for me, not for anything else) she never pushes me just encourages me. She said she prayed that i would get the job, and the look in her eye made me angry, not at her, but at God, why was he not listening to her prayers, I may not be the best muslim but she is the best muslim in my life. The job i can get is a security ( like my previous job i left) ( i am very skilled and trained up to a managerial level) but i do not want to do that job as the reasons i stopped was becuase it brought out the worst in me, dealing with drunks and abuse it made me a very angry person i learnt to deal with it, but just before i quit i noticed a change in my deamenour it was making me a even worse person. Being stuck at home all day me and my mum have started to argue on occasion, and i do not want to argue with my mum, i love her more than anything. I have never swore or got too angry at her. As a result i stay in my room and now, i feel like the world is passing me by, i want to get married, have kids. but things just never seem to go that way for me. It seems as if i am under constant bad luck. I don't think there was a question i wanted to ask, but the annonimity and getting this off my chest is made me feel better. PS. Yes I am a Muslim in the UK, sorry for rambling
 
:wasalamex

Hard times are a part of everyone's life. I myself am suffering from a financial crunch at the moment, and need solutions as quick as possible, but it doesn't mean Allah is not pleased with us. Hardships are not a sign of Allah's lack of love for us. However, you have no right to be "angry" at Allah just because you're not getting a job. You said it yourself that you're not a practicing Muslim, and so Allah has far bigger reasons to be angry at you. You need to calm down, and prevent yourself from this rebellion towards Allah that is building inside you. It is not going to help you in anyway, and will only be an avenue leading to your doom. So don't even think that you can stand up against Allah.

In 2010, I was in the exact same situation as you. I tried multiple interviews, but never seemed to be able to land a job. I tried at a lot of places. Then I decided to change my approach towards interviews. I prepared better and more confident answers, I rehearsed at home, and I got the job on the very next interview I went for, alhamdulillah. So, try to work hard on your communication skills to excel in interviews. My professors used to tell me when I was in college that confidence is a bigger asset than credentials. Get that level of confidence and skill by rehearsing and learning communication techniques after which they are more interested in hiring you than you are in working for them. There are abundant jobs these days and if provided enough hardwork, you can get your hands on anyone you want.

Plus, it is very commendable that you have so much love for your Mom, MashAllah. Ya Allah, bless every heart with love for their mothers. Ameen. So you should also realize that your so called "anger" against Allah isn't going to please her in anyway as well. She'd be very worried and saddened to know that her own child is deviating away from deen.

Get yourself together. Start offering all the 5 daily prayers from today itself. Do as many good deeds as possible. Get out of the room. Improve your communication skills. And get yourself a good job. Pray to Allah for it.

And there is no prayer which is never answered.
http://islamqa.com/en/ref/5113
[MAD]
When a Muslim prays he gets one of the following 3 things
1 - Allah accepts his Dua
2 - Allah keeps it for him till the day of judgment
3 - Allah keeps him away from harm as equal as the Dua.[/MAD]
 
"Do you suppose that you will enter the Garden without first having suffered like those before you? They were afflicted by misfortune and hardship, and they were so shaken that even [their] messenger and the believers with him cried, ‘When will God’s help arrive?’ Truly, God’s help is near."

Surah Al Baqarah Verse 214
 
gaz said:
Salam I don't really know how to put this, but here goes. For the last year i have really been struggleing, Emotionaly, spirtually and financialy and every other way. Im not the worst person in the world but i am not without my faults. I see people around me with good jobs, friends, family, some who deserve what they have, I friends who have amazing jobs and grow drugs at the same time. The only reall person who i look up to and would do anything for is my mum, she is without a doubt my best friend, and someone whome i love more than anything. And the problem i have is, I keep applying for jobs, and going to interviews and nothing ever works out for me. My mum always prays for me before every interview, and all i want is a job so i can make my mum happy, I have worked since i was 16 ( now 27 ) but i quit my job fpr reasons below. The other day i got a call rejecting me for a job i had applied for. It didn't bother me too much as it was just another rejection. But when i told my mum she was disapointed ( not at me at the situation, she really wants me to get a job, for me, not for anything else) she never pushes me just encourages me. She said she prayed that i would get the job, and the look in her eye made me angry, not at her, but at God, why was he not listening to her prayers, I may not be the best muslim but she is the best muslim in my life. The job i can get is a security ( like my previous job i left) ( i am very skilled and trained up to a managerial level) but i do not want to do that job as the reasons i stopped was becuase it brought out the worst in me, dealing with drunks and abuse it made me a very angry person i learnt to deal with it, but just before i quit i noticed a change in my deamenour it was making me a even worse person. Being stuck at home all day me and my mum have started to argue on occasion, and i do not want to argue with my mum, i love her more than anything. I have never swore or got too angry at her. As a result i stay in my room and now, i feel like the world is passing me by, i want to get married, have kids. but things just never seem to go that way for me. It seems as if i am under constant bad luck. I don't think there was a question i wanted to ask, but the annonimity and getting this off my chest is made me feel better. PS. Yes I am a Muslim in the UK, sorry for rambling
Click to expand...

Assalaam Alaikum bro Gaz, when I first joined here, I made a similar post to yours...

...Sabr akhi, patience. Also bro, don't go locking yourself in your room - sit in the masjid if you have to, and only stay in your bedroom if you some cleaning to do or some sleep to catch up on. Start there, the job and wife will come after insha-Allah :)

Most of all, smile... make your stomach feel the smile, make it genuine - get a kitten or a canary or something which will take your focus away from your "self"...

... Welcome to IslamicBoard, where every member is an asset to the community (whether they know it or not) :)

Scimi
 
:wa:

If you're not the best muslim then work towards it - it'll only benefit you. When things don't go our way we have to look at ourselves and see where we're going wrong. Do you pray 5 times a day? Do you stay away from sin? If you are and your prayers still aren't being answered then its a test of patience. As long as you're doing your bit the Al-Mighty will sort out the rest.
 
I'll take a different approach. Hopefully not patronising...

Email job agencies directly, asking them to get in touch if they find any jobs in your desired field. True, the jobs provided will probably be temporary in nature, but it's still a job.

Do any of your friends or family work in your desired field? If so, ask them to let you know if any vacancies come up within their organisations. Often, a business will only advertise a vacancy to the general public as a last resort.

To repeat what you already know, it's a tough market out there right now. Keep praying and keep smiling.
 
Thanks for the advice, I try and stay a good person, I always treat my family right especialy my mum. All i want to do is make my mum happy and i know that getting a job will do that becasue i know that is what she wants for me. I remember when i was 18 i had no money and i had a job interview, and had no formal shirt, My mum who at the time did not have alot of money brought me one, without me asking, somehow she knew! It always stayed with me and all i want to do is make her smile. I will start looking at praying, but as ashamed as i am to say this, i don't know how :( I go to the mosque on fridays and i read some of the prayers i learnt in mosque and follow everbody else. It is something i should have learnt a long time ago, but i find it all a bit overwhelming. But i will look into it.

With regards to being angry at God, It was an emotional resposnse, one that i didn't think i was capable of, it was only for a minuit, but it is hard to describe how it made me feel.
 
One of God's great names is al-hakim, the Wise. yes, everything He does is based on wisdom. We may not see the wisdom behind some happening now, but later we may see that what happened was for the better. It is also possible that we never see the wisdom, the benefit of the happening, because it's effect may not even show up in our own lives, but nontheless, there is wisdom behind it. this is because that thing which happened had far reaching consequences.

somethings that happen, do so to train us. maybe they make you more patient. or may be they train you to be more hardworking, etc. Or they me simply a test, to see how thankful and patient you are. When you read about God's beloved Prophets, you see how much they were tried. Prophet Ibrahim (AS) had to wait until he was 80 before he had his first child. and when the child was about 10, he ad to sacrifice the child for God's sake. Of course, God saved the child and sent a lamb instead, but Prophet Ibrahim (AS) was tried. and it was a great trial, as Allah Himself called it 'karbul-Azim' in the Quran.

Prophet Ayub (AS) had to go through so much suffering.

Who were more beloved than the Prophets? But they had to go through so much more than any of us.

many people can't find good halal jobs. Just hang in there and keep doing dua. Your mother's duas re accepted as are your own and sometimes the duas are answered in a way different from what we want. Sometimes because of them, some bad happening is stopped. or maybe there is a benefit in you not getting that particular job. (what kind of job is this? is it halal?)

eventually you will find some job, maybe something better than this job.

For now, use the time to get closer to Allah. pray more and read the Quran more and even try memorizing some. you can also read the commentary of the Quran, I post some in the Quran section of IB.

And don't fight with your mother. that will hurt and quarrels will affect you too. I kknow it is hard when you are at home so much and frustrated.

you can try volunteering in community service and use that as a time passer. and also get some references in this way.

May Allah help you and make you more patient. ameen
 
Hi, Thanks for such a lovley post. I try not to argue with my Mum, likei said, she means the world to me, but when i find myself getting frustrated with her i try and remove myself from the situation, thankfully we do not quarrel often. I will try and use my time to get closer to god. Learn how to read namaz, but like i said the idea and thought of praying five times a day is very daunting for me as someone who only prays once a week. I can get a job but it will be doing security work which i did and became very very good at but i stopped becuase it was bringing out the worst in me, and i really do not want to go back there.
 
Bro, when you learn to pray, don't feel the pressure to keep 5 times salaah. Rather, you should build up to it slowly, meaning that you make a habit of keeping one salah a day, for example Zuhr, and once that becomes a part of your daily routine - then pick up another salah that you feel will be easy to keep. For example Asr salaah.

Most people who jump into the 5 times a day witha gung ho attitude, often crash and burn out as soon as something bad happens in their life. Happened to me bro, I speak from experience. Experience also taught me that slow but steady is the best way to progress on deen. As long as you are on the path, that's all that matters... no need to run :)

Scimi
 
I forgot to add.

Read Surah Al-Waqiah after Maghrib prayer. there are hadith about it being for increasing sustenance. if someone can post the hadith it would be good.

and do your prayers regularly. don't you know the hadith that the difference between kafir and muslim is that at prayer time the muslim gets up for prayer and the kafir doesn't?
not to mention the horrible punishment for not doing prayer on time.
 

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