Any sisters housewives?

[Rhubarb Tart]

If a sister wants to be a doctor due to a requirement or need in the Muslim community for female doctors, and her family support her in that, I think this is praiseworthy and there is a lot of reward. This is a big sacrifice to make, and an honorable position. In this situation and an Ideal Muslim world, if the sister has children and wants to become a doctor or teacher, her relatives such as her mother or sister, and the Muslim community should take care of her children and give them full support - for they are the future, and their stability, tarbiya and upbringing is a priority and should not be compromised or put at risk. This should be TEAM WORK. The sister should not do this on her own or have to send her children to the non Muslim nurseries in order to achieve this. If this is the case, or her children will be deprived or neglected or their tarbiya effected, then I am personally against that sister becoming a doctor and I think she should wait until her children grow up or let the other sisters who are in a position or who don't have children do it. and Allaah knows best

:wa:

I agree if a sister has children, the children obviously need close support. I never said I agree with day care by non muslims. In fact I am strongly against children being brought up by strangers. I dont have a problem with it if a sister was to that part time or had a family to support her. But I wouldnt discourage sister from working. It is not just doctors, shop keepers (would you want a man to measure you?), lawyers, teachers, a lot of jobs really. Not all married women have children like the OP.

I just dont get this attitude presented by muslims in general that women shouldnt work when they are first to request a woman to deal with their sisters and daughters. Like I said women are needed in society.

Allah (swt) knows best...

 

[muslimsister1]

Jazakallah for all your replies, may Allah SWT reward you all for your time and effort, i have spoken with my hubby n he has sed it is up 2 me as lng as i am happy, i am working prt time as a admin assistant 9-1 but my job is so boring i sit on the net for at least most of the time i am there. ple say i hve it cushy and yeh i do but theres only so much internet u can take, u do need motivitation, im worried that im looking at becoming a housewife as a way to get out of the job im in. during the day its only me n my mother inlaw

 

[Alpha Dude]

Im jst wondering if any sisters are houcewives and how is it for them, i truly beleve that it will be Allah SWT who will give barkat in my husbands earnings and feel that if i was to become a housewife Allah SWT will be pleased and bestow us with many blessings Inshaallah. Look forward to your replies.

Asalamu alaykum sister,

You have noble intentions, mashaAllah. I would just like to advise that if you do become a housewife and contrary to what you hope for now, you end up with what seems like little material blessing, don't lose hope or assume you made the wrong decision. Life is not meant to be rosy and there will always be trials, even if you are fully Islamically orienting yourself (in whatever capacity).

In such a case, the blessings would display fruit in the akhirah at least inshaAllah.

 

[Rhubarb Tart]

This is great advice.


I have never understood how someone could be bored being a housewife. The times when I was, I always found plenty of things to occupy my time, and I was never bored. Of course, I also do quite a bit. With gardening, cleaning, kids, cooking, sewing, beading, crochet, home maintenance, etc. I just never had time for boredom-- and that was even before I had ever discovered the internet to occupy myself with. LOL I'd love to be a full time SAHM, but unfortunately life has not afforded me that privilege. If I had that time, I could get so much more things done!!!

the cooking, cleaning and house maintenance takes me 2 hours max. When I was a housewife I never used to be bored because I found other things to do outside the community. I agree one can keep themselves occupied but the cooking and stuff doesnt take long for me personally.

 

[Rhubarb Tart]

Jazakallah for all your replies, may Allah SWT reward you all for your time and effort, i have spoken with my hubby n he has sed it is up 2 me as lng as i am happy, i am working prt time as a admin assistant 9-1 but my job is so boring i sit on the net for at least most of the time i am there. ple say i hve it cushy and yeh i do but theres only so much internet u can take, u do need motivitation, im worried that im looking at becoming a housewife as a way to get out of the job im in. during the day its only me n my mother inlaw

If you want to be housewife but can find other stuff in your local area (asking your mosque? helping out the eldery? local hospital?) to do or you can just and try find a meaningful course or job? Either way find something that is meaningful to you and suited to your house.

 

[PouringRain]

the cooking, cleaning and house maintenance takes me 2 hours max. When I was a housewife I never used to be bored because I found other things to do outside the community. I agree one can keep themselves occupied but the cooking and stuff doesnt take long for me personally.

I have heard others also say that the cooking, cleaning, and house maintenance take very minimal time. (When I say house maintenance I am talking about basic carpentry, painting, basic plumbing, repairing things, caulking, etc. I've never had the luxury of hiring outside help for anything.) For me, even my cooking takes about 2 hours a day. ;D Prep time for a meal can take anywhere from 30-60 minutes, depending on what I am making. I have to make all my foods from scratch, including baking my breads.

Most of the time when I stayed home I was also in school. There was also a period of time when I homeschooled the children. I've never been home without at least one child home with me though.

 

[Muslim Woman]

I am a full time housewife and I enjoy it I know many women don't like to hear it but it's true :statisfie

I worked in an office for 6 years and I hated it :heated: So many contacts with men and sometimes I needed to go out for field trilps - I did not like it .


Now I spend my time on translating Islamic books . As I don't work , when any female relative needs to go to doctor and needs company when admitted to hospital , they think of me lol


So sis , it's up to u . If u stay home , many people wont' appreiciate it and wil say that it's a wastage of time . It's ur life ; so within the bounday of Islam , u have to decide how to spend it .

 

[ardianto]

Not every wife that does not work is a housewife. The housewife is a wife who works daily care of the house and everything in it, taking care of her husband and her children.

In fact, there are wives who do not work but spends their time just to have fun, hang out with other women for gossiping. While the home affairs entirely left to the maid, and child care is left entirely to the baby siter.

Such wives can not be called a housewife.

 

[Reflections]

MashaAllah some interesting points brought forward here.

 

[Muslim Woman]

:wa:

Not every wife that does not work is a housewife. The housewife is a wife who works daily care of the house

I read a fatwa that if husband can afford , it' ok to have maids.

there are wives who do not work but spends their time just to have fun, hang out with other women for gossiping. While the home affairs entirely left to the maid,

hmmm reminds me of the marriage joke -;D

I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"

"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!"
So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"

 

[syilla]

^^^remind me of my friend. she asked her husband : lets go to london? husband answered: London? you mean london weight management? and my friend was speechless lol and complaint in her fb lol

 

[ardianto]

I read a fatwa that if husband can afford , it' ok to have maids.

I know. My mommy always had a maid to help her.

But there is a difference between hiring maid, with hand over all the housekeeping to the maid without going to care what happens at home.

As an example. may hire a maid to cook, but the wife still have to determine what food should be cooked for the family because this is her responsibility as a housewife. Do not let the maid determines what will be cooked while the wife does not care at all.

what I mean by a wife who is not a housewife is a wife who employ maid only because she does not want to be responsible with household affairs and wants to spend time just for fun without regard to her husband and children.

Wives like this are really exist.

 

[syilla]

i never had maids...or maid do i considered as a housewife. i tried to do everything but with the help from my mom (but she is busy with islamic studies) and from my very helpful hubby.

of course there are times when we can't cope with all the housework but we manage and we never even feel like or need to have one.

reading the comments in this thread... i felt that i 'can' be considered as a housewife lol

 

[UmmuShaheed]

Im in the middle.
I do believe earning is a mans job
but its nice for us sisters to contribute the ummah.
If things get bad, then you should have something that you can fall back on.
And like many people have said before, it does depend on the persons personality.

 

[Txyib]

salam
being a housewife can be adorably fun if you get on with your in-laws and if you really connect and laugh about and do the work at the same time whilst working . this way they will think pleasant of you and you are helping clean their house and do work gaining thawab good deeds
however if you dont get on with inlaws it can be a real challenge for you thou you still get the rewards and you can just think of doing the work for the good
wasalam
محمد طيب

 

[esperanza]

being a housewife can also be extremely lonely at times

 

[ardianto]

being a housewife can also be extremely lonely at times

When we lived in our old home, my wife often complain like this. But not again since 7 years ago after we moved to the house where we are living now. I work at home, I mean my office is in my house. So, we always together everyday.

 

[Paprika]

Why are you looking for the housewives sisters????

kya zamaana agaya, speak to the waali's man....

 

[Riana17]

Asalam Alaikkum

I agree with almost everyone, really depends on personality and circumstances
I do not consider myself housewife yet, but inshallah one day soon I will be one

I was working since young age and once the focus of my life was my career.
Alhamdollellah I am blessed with a husband who never force me to do all household chores or stop me from working

I am working 8hrs/6x a week & my husband is 8hrs/5x a week, now I am very slowly doing a housewife job
It becomes a routine to cook every Thursday now, thanks to Brother Ardianto, very effective advise mashallah
Subhannallah my husband would finish his meal to pieces whether my cook is salty, sweet&sour, over or under cook

aside from work, we have small business and my husband and I spent like 3x a week on it, alhamdollellah
I work not because my husband cannot provide, its because my husband is okay with it and he gives me freedom, I love it when I am able to contribute & have my own, because of the Mercy of Allah & my job, I was once the instrument of Allah to send my nephew in open heart surgery, Alhamdollellah. Really nice to have your own work, inshallah I can work for longer period.Ameen ya Rabb

Im not trying to show off or something but one of the beauty of Islam, is zakat or saddaqah & alhamdollellah I can do it from my own sweat, simple deed overflows my heart like last time me & our Teaboy (Muslim) shared & get one cow to Indian family, I didnt knew he arranged a pregnant one, Mashallah after 2months he had a baby!!!! Hehehehe really love the feeling

I can imagine if I am not employed, dont know really

 

[ardianto]

I am working 8hrs/6x a week & my husband is 8hrs/5x a week, now I am very slowly doing a housewife job
It becomes a routine to cook every Thursday now, thanks to Brother Ardianto, very effective advise mashallah
Subhannallah my husband would finish his meal to pieces whether my cook is salty, sweet&sour, over or under cook

You're welcome.

You start enjoy the fun of cooking, aren't you?. Don't forget to always cook with love.