Brothers only please

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This is something which i'd rather post as anonymous gender, i would rather it stay in this section of the forum, for reasons which are very personal to me.
i wana know... if a women was incapable of having children, would brother's still marry her? honest answers please. if you do not wish to post as yourself please tick anongender. but please, i ask for honest replies inshallah
 
:salamext:

I'm a sister.

I've always thought about this though.

And this is what I think:

It depends when either of the two found this out.

If the bro knew that before marrying her then I think there'd be more of a chance of him rejecting her.

Since marriage is the only sacred bond that allows us to raise a family in the halal way

And IMO children are what make a family complete SubhanAllah

On the other hand, if they found out afterwards. I think Allah (swt) places so much love and Rahmah into the hearts of His slaves (for one another) that it is quite possible that they could still remain happy.

If not, the question of a second wife would prob come up.
 
Yes.

Children do make a family whole, but that doesn't mean that a woman who is not capable of having children be shunned, and not have the chance to have a loving husband.

:w:
 
This is an unusual topic forgive me.. do you know for a fact it is the woman that can't have a child confirmed by testing? The first test done by way of infertility is a sperm count, as a very common cause of infertility in couples..

I do digress.. look at it this way, and I am not sure of your gender.. how would you feel if someone decided not to marry you for what they perceive as a fault?
being depressed or wheel chair bound, or got into an accident or lost a job? life is full of misery.

It isn't in our hands, life, death, birth... Allah giveth and Allah taketh away.. a marriage is composed of many things.. friendship and companionship I hope is on top of that list?..
Sometimes folks have mentally challenged kids
sometimes folks have kids who die, just browse this forum you'll learn of it
some folks have evil kids
some people can't afford their kids
some people can't have them..
secret is to be grateful and content with whatever life hands you...

You can always sponsor children in Muslim or African countries who need support and guidance, but not being able to have kids, really shouldn't be on the itinerary on whether or not you decide to marry someone...

Allah knows best

:w:
 
It depends on the person, but definatly possible, especially if they like the sister alot. In the end, you could still adopt if you really want a child.
 
:sl:

To me it shouldn't be a reason whatsoever. Being infertile as skye said isn't always the womens fault. My cousin was married for 2 years without being able to get a child, and going through alot of dua's, now alhamdulilah shes blessed with twins! :D

:w:
 
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AnonymousGender said:
i wana know... if a women was incapable of having children, would brother's still marry her? honest answers please. if you do not wish to post as yourself please tick anongender. but please, i ask for honest replies inshallah
Click to expand...

if i am inclined towards her i most certainly wouldnt hesitate.
 
Skye Ephémérine said:
This is an unusual topic forgive me.. do you know for a fact it is the woman that can't have a child confirmed by testing? The first test done by way of infertility is a sperm count, as a very common cause of infertility in couples..

I do digress.. look at it this way, and I am not sure of your gender.. how would you feel if someone decided not to marry you for what they perceive as a fault?
being depressed or wheel chair bound, or got into an accident or lost a job? life is full of misery.

It isn't in our hands, life, death, birth... Allah giveth and Allah taketh away.. a marriage is composed of many things.. friendship and companionship I hope is on top of that list?..
Sometimes folks have mentally challenged kids
sometimes folks have kids who die, just browse this forum you'll learn of it
some folks have evil kids
some people can't afford their kids
some people can't have them..
secret is to be grateful and content with whatever life hands you...

You can always sponsor children in Muslim or African countries who need support and guidance, but not being able to have kids, really shouldn't be on the itinerary on whether or not you decide to marry someone...

Allah knows best

:w:
Click to expand...




I agree 100% With This ^ Nothing to say more :)

:w:
 
Hey i was reading your message and thought about what you said....

In my opinion if i was in a situation over marrying a woman who cant have children, i would 100% marry that woman only if i feel that the woman is right for me, as if in same likes and dislikes, same hobbies etc

I look at it this....way people are not perfect and in my opinion it would be something specail to marry a woman who cant have kids.... besides this only means adapting children if the woman agree's on it, there are way too many orphans and would only alow ones who cant have children to adapt :).

But even though if she dont want to adapt, if the woman is right for me thats all i need to know!

 
I asked my brother this question.. his reply was.... "Depends on how much you loved the fem, but it's hard :-S only a few would consider."

The same Q could go for females too....
 
AnonymousGender said:
This is something which i'd rather post as anonymous gender, i would rather it stay in this section of the forum, for reasons which are very personal to me.
i wana know... if a women was incapable of having children, would brother's still marry her? honest answers please. if you do not wish to post as yourself please tick anongender. but please, i ask for honest replies inshallah
Click to expand...

i know this is only for the bros...but cant you marry a potential spouse (im assuming this is for you) even if you couldn't have kids... but then let him get married again:)

@ sis skye, nice reply :)
 
Skye Ephémérine said:
This is an unusual topic forgive me.. do you know for a fact it is the woman that can't have a child confirmed by testing? The first test done by way of infertility is a sperm count, as a very common cause of infertility in couples..

I do digress.. look at it this way, and I am not sure of your gender.. how would you feel if someone decided not to marry you for what they perceive as a fault?
being depressed or wheel chair bound, or got into an accident or lost a job? life is full of misery.

It isn't in our hands, life, death, birth... Allah giveth and Allah taketh away.. a marriage is composed of many things.. friendship and companionship I hope is on top of that list?..
Sometimes folks have mentally challenged kids
sometimes folks have kids who die, just browse this forum you'll learn of it
some folks have evil kids
some people can't afford their kids
some people can't have them..
secret is to be grateful and content with whatever life hands you...

You can always sponsor children in Muslim or African countries who need support and guidance, but not being able to have kids, really shouldn't be on the itinerary on whether or not you decide to marry someone...

Allah knows best

:w:
Click to expand...
With all due respect, as 'unsual' topic this is, as i said, its important. yes, i am not silly, i understand what your trying to say.
it is important as a matter of fact. as i am female and belieive you me, children are such an important thing in a males life. i have been told that i risk chance of ovary failure as i grow older, so that shows i'm quit young. and for someone my age to go through somthing like that, is rare. i dont want sympathy. i want honest answers from brothers as i fear for my health and for my future. but it is in Allah's hands. salaam aall
 
does it not put brothers off that your wife may be incapable of having children? its hard to say, oh yeh thats fine, as long as i love her. but we all know that people that say are majority of the time just lying.
 
also, in respect of adoption, does the child not become non-mahram when he/she grows up for the opposite gender parent, i think theres a difference of opinion on this, correct me if i am wrong
 
Sis ^ if you dont breastfeed the child then yes the child becomes a non mahram ..I am at Uni so Isha Allah when i get home i be able to give you the evidence.

Sister just make dua and do not despair my brother wife cannot have children and he loves her and is content with that so not all brothers will run a mile there are many brothers who will stay and may Allah swt reward you for your patient, this life is a test and is too short.
 
AnonymousGender said:
does it not put brothers off that your wife may be incapable of having children? its hard to say, oh yeh thats fine, as long as i love her. but we all know that people that say are majority of the time just lying.
Click to expand...

what the,

you know even if you marry a woman who you think is "able" to have children your whole life may pass and you wont be able to have one.

Sure it might be a test but as a brother already mentioned before, there can be beauty within a wife who cant bare children, it could bring blessings wallahu a'lam
 
:salamext:

I personally think that any brother who divorces a woman or loves her less, just because she cannot produce kids is deranged and mashed in the head, and should get a life. Seriously.
 
AnonymousGender said:
This is something which i'd rather post as anonymous gender, i would rather it stay in this section of the forum, for reasons which are very personal to me.
i wana know... if a women was incapable of having children, would brother's still marry her? honest answers please. if you do not wish to post as yourself please tick anongender. but please, i ask for honest replies inshallah
Click to expand...

There was a woman who never had children but kept hope in Allah that she will one day give birth and when she was in her 40's, Allah blessed her with twins if I remember correctly (or was it triplets) because she kept her faith in Allah that one day she will give birth. And after that she many children of her own.

Personally, if I had a chance to marry a sister who can't conceive I might still marry her but as a second wife because I would like to have children at least with one wife. And I would marry her (i.e. the one who can't conceive) as a second wife even if she us unable to conceive because the Prophet would marry woman just to take care of them. And of course as a second wife this does not by any means mean that she is second best to anyone in my family, nor would I treat her any different, rather I would give my heart to her because the Prophet (saws) said "The best amongst you are those who are best to his wives".
 
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