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AnonymousPoster

AnonymousPoster

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I've been depressed for so long now (years yes YEARS) that I am so close to losing faith or maybe I've already lost it. I pray as much as I can but I give up now. I still feel the need to pray, but having the sincerety and even trying to believe that eventually my duas will be answered and I will get better is an impossibilty.

I can't think like that anymore, it's probably not worth me praying if I haven't got the sincerety in my heart right? Should I just give up altogether and accept that this is my life and I will NEVER get better?

Please don't tell me things will change and I have to believe they will and all that crap because my kismet is already written, I can't do anything, that's right NOT even make dua because it will never be accepted.

Please don't tell me I will live a happier life in the hereafter, YOU DON'T KNOW THAT FOR SURE ONLY ALLAH SWT KNOWS!!!

After years and years of trying to make my life better, it collapses on top of me again and again. I pray and I pray and yes I shouldn't be complaining like this but how else am i supposed to let this anger and these frustrations out to release the tension?

No one else listens, my family don't care, my friends are sick of me and my depression (not good friends I know) or maybe i've driven them away by being miserable all the time.

I wake up every morning feeling painfully lonely, empty, like I'm already dead just walking around in a body, nothing to look forward too, no true friends, no family who actually care. I drive around in my car and I just cry while i'm driving, I used to play the Qur'an in my car, but not even that makes me feel better. Even after praying, I feel lifeless and empty.

Why should anyone care how i feel? Afterall, I'm just another 'nobody' walking around on this earth waiting to drop dead with this torturous pain and loneliness.

I say Istighfar all the time but I can't say it like I mean it, I can't recite the Qur'an like I mean it anymore, I can't read any dua like I mean it anymore, I feel treacherously hopeless. All these words can't describe the pain and suffering I'm going through.

What I do, should I just give up and accept that I was born to live in misery? If Allah swt is forgiving, why after years of asking for forgiveness am I still suffering this much? Why do people say "Allah doesn't burden a soul more than it can bear"? When I feel i could collapse and die any minute from this pain that has built up over the years and has got too much for me to handle?

Do I really have to accept the fact that i will NEVER see the light at the end of the tunnel?

"Verily after hardship comes relief" YES that is correct for everyone EXCEPT ME!

"No soul is burdened with more than it can bare" YES for all of you EXCEPT ME!!!!!

None of these matter to all of you, you are just reading, you can't feel what i feel.

These words are nothing. I'm nothing, this world is nothing!!! My pain doesn't mean anything to anybody.

I see happy people, I want to murder them.

I see people smiling, I want to murder them.

DON'T TELL ME THEY MIGHT BE UNHAPPY BEHIND CLOSED DOORS!!!! AT LEAST THEY CAN MANAGE A SMILE!!!!!!!!!!!!


One day people will be sad and the next day they find relief. Allah swt eases their pain after a while.

But my pain doesn't matter, it carries on and on and it doesn't stop hurting. This is not a TEST IT'S NEVERENDING TORTURE!!!!!

Are you all happy? haha, did you all find 'relief after hardship' hahahaaaaaa GOOD FOR U!!!!!!!

Are any of you going through hardship right now this very minute????? What is your hardship? It's probably so minor and pathetic you call it HARDSHIP LOL!!!!!!

Don't worry about me, I'm just another excuse for a human being!!!!! MY FEELINGS DON'T COUNT!!!!!!

SORRY IF I'VE OFFENDED ANYONE I DON'T MEAN TO, YOUR PROBLEMS MUST BE REAL BAD!!!!!

What are you going to tell me next? That I have a roof over my head, I have bread to eat and clothes to wear?????? WHAT IS THE POINT WHEN I'M LIVING IN MISERY!!!!!!!


Are you going to tell me that the people in GAZA are suffering???? so am I! YES GO ON CALL ME PATHETIC OR WHATEVER COMES TO MIND!!!!!

GOOD LUCK TO YOU ALL IN YOUR SHORT LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!

DON'T BOTHER REMEMBERING ME IN YOUR PRAYERS!!!!!!!!!!!
 
Ive never met anyone who sounds so much like me a few months ago. So that's what it was like.

If you can be bothered...go through my thread history. Read them. Identical.

You arent telling is what your problem is...but you know what...i get you. I know you dont believe me...coz ur life is just 'different' and 'worse' and I wont understand.

You can live however you like. You can give up on your deen and iman if you like. Thats all in your hands. Why ask us smiling, happy losers anyway?

We cannot care for you if you do not care for yourself.

People will get sick of you the same way you are pushing them away.

You will be lonlier than you have ever known to be.

You dont care now...post-rant/vent time is best left untouched. I just felt like sharing my two cents.

btw, mind over matter dude.
 
This is such a dark time you are going through ... I can feel your pain.

I have no answer for you - at least not one which wouldn't sound at least vaguely patronising.
If you like I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers though.

Can I ask if you have sought any medical help for your depression?
Counselling and/or medication may just help you to lift your mood enough to engage with your life better.

Some friends and members of your family may be getting frustrated with you, but do you have people who will support you and sustain you?
Can you look for support groups?
Don't isolate yourself. Try to stay in contact with people, no matter how hard it may seem.

I wish you well and I hope you enter better times soon.

Peace
 
What are you going to tell me next? That I have a roof over my head, I have bread to eat and clothes to wear?????? WHAT IS THE POINT WHEN I'M LIVING IN MISERY!!!!!!!


Are you going to tell me that the people in GAZA are suffering???? so am I! YES GO ON CALL ME PATHETIC OR WHATEVER COMES TO MIND!!!!!

GOOD LUCK TO YOU ALL IN YOUR SHORT LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!

DON'T BOTHER REMEMBERING ME IN YOUR PRAYERS!!!!!!!!!!!


Reply With Quote
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If you don't want any help or advice, then what's the point of this thread? I don't get it!
I just have one thing to say: Never despair of the mercy of God.
 
Last edited:
glo said:
This is such a dark time you are going through ... I can feel your pain.

I have no answer for you - at least not one which wouldn't sound at least vaguely patronising.
If you like I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers though.

Can I ask if you have sought any medical help for your depression?
Counselling and/or medication may just help you to lift your mood enough to engage with your life better.

Some friends and members of your family may be getting frustrated with you, but do you have people who will support you and sustain you?
Can you look for support groups?
Don't isolate yourself. Try to stay in contact with people, no matter how hard it may seem.

I wish you well and I hope you enter better times soon.

Peace
Click to expand...

:sl:

Thank you for bothering to reply.

I can't take anti-depressants, they don't work for me plus their only a temporary measure, depression always comes back.

I was refered to a psychiatrist, but not very helpful. It's a DEAD END.


Thank you for your kind words.
 
Lara said:
If you don't want any help or advice, then what's the point of this thread? I don't get it!I just have one thing to say: Never despair of the mercy of God.
Click to expand...

LETTING MY ANGER AND FRUSTRATION OUT!!!

IF YOU 'DON'T GET IT' DON'T BOTHER REPLYING TO THE THREAD!!! :mad:
 
AnonymousGender said:
:sl:

Thank you for bothering to reply.

I can't take anti-depressants, they don't work for me plus their only a temporary measure, depression always comes back.

I was refered to a psychiatrist, but not very helpful. It's a DEAD END.


Thank you for your kind words.
Click to expand...

travel the world. Go Africa.

Go Egypt.

Go yemen.

Go Bangladesh.



See this world, maybe you'll realise something inshAllah
 
LETTING MY ANGER AND FRUSTRATION OUT!!!

IF YOU 'DON'T GET IT' DON'T BOTHER REPLYING TO THE THREAD!!!
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Hey!! Calm down!! I didn't mean to offend you!
Actually, I understand how u r feeling...I felt that way before.
I felt nothing when I was praying, I did not read the Quran. Eventually I stopped praying and I went through tough times...and my friends started saying that it was because I stopped practicing my religion after God has guided me. They didn't understand...

So i know how you are feeling, I was just wondering why you did not want any advice cos there are probably other people who have had similar problems and maybe they can help.
 
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Alpha Dude said:
:sl: Bro/sis, I don't think you should look at other people and assume that they don't have hardships, just because they smile, laugh/joke around.

A lot of people use humour to get away from the problems they face. It's not just for the sake of having fun, it's more as a refuge away from having to be thinking about negativity all the time. I know this is true for me, at least.

Also, we all need to keep in mind that this world is only temporary and in comparison to the akirah, it is nothing at all. It would only be like a day, or half a day, of the vastness in the hereafter.

Allah is what you think Allah to be. If you constantly think Allah is going to let you down, then there is less chance of your duas being accepted.

When you make dua, you HAVE to BELIEVE that Allah is listening and will answer. Don't be negative about it, that is one of the conditions of the acceptance of dua.

Above and beyond anything, you need to keep in mind that THE goal is not this world. You're not meant to have total happiness in this world. The goal is to be a good muslim and gain paradise/avoidance from hell-fire, ANYTHING that stops you from achieving this is a DISTRACTION. A distraction that's possibly from the shaytan and/or something that stems from the desires of your nafs.

I know, easier said than done, but whatever happens, you need to strive for the other-world, more than this one.
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How can I make myself believe that? I've read books about dua to help me too but nothing is helping and I want to help myself, but believe me when I say NOTHING is helping me have sincerety in my duas and prayers anymore. There's only so much a soul can take and if I wasn't Muslim I would have commit suicide by now.

Why have i suffered most of my life, what a waste of a life!!!!!! Why do others suffer a while then get happiness afterwards??????? Why is mine ongoing for so long?????????

Others have at least a bit of happiness in this world, and it's not fair that they will also get in the hereafter. BUT ME?????? I've had NO happiness and it's not guaranteed I'll have any happiness in the hereafter.

I can't help the way I'm talking, how negative I am. Living the kind of torturous life I've lived has turned me into this person, whatever I am!!!!!!

I wish I had the ability to change but I don't, it's been too long and I am completely and utterly fed up and exhausted!!!

Thank you for the advice I know you are only trying to help.
 
^ stop reading/thinking etc for real its not helping you.


TRAVEL ! RELAX ! UNWIND !
 
May Allah subhanahu wata'ala help you in difficult times. Ameen.
 
You know...you asked a few posts down how you could make yourself believe in Allah's Allahness.

To that I tell you to fake it till you make it.

I know that you wont get that and you think im being a silly idiot...but it works.

Ever forced yourself onto a prayer mat and forced yourself to cry ur bottom off to this creator who you are so angry at?

Try it.

You know...when doing stuff to fix urself dont think that the stuff will work.

Counselling doesnt help. Nothing helps. But the fact that you are taking steps on your own accord about things which concern you help you take back a little bit of control in your life. Only you can force urself into that counsellors office or onto that aeroplane or onto that prayer mat. You control urself and ur life utterly at those moments.

You need 'you' time. You obviously havent spent much time with urself in a long time..or ever. coz you dnt know how to handle urself..and u are so delicate...

allocate a corner in ur room. or any room or backyard. switch ur phone off and face a wall, a tree or something....and try to think of nothing. as ur brain tries to clear the fuzz to reach 'nothing'...it will find clarity...one day...and even if it doesnt work..ur spending time on you..and guess what...for people who have crap lives like you, keep in mind that no one will ever spend time on you..so maybe you should.
 
KashifB said:
May Allah subhanahu wata'ala help you in difficult times. Ameen.
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hahaha my whole life is one big 'DIFFICULT TIME' is there such thing as 'easy times'? LOL!!! I don't believe in happiness, I don't believe in 'ease'!!!!!!!!

Thanks for the Dua....... Now lets see what happens, lets see if that dua reached Allah swt!!!!! hahahahahahahah :D
 
Alpha Dude said:
Another point is that Allah bestows hardship upon the people he loves in this world, so that they don't have to face it in the hereafter.

Hardship is also a wake-up call. Something that Allah is using to draw you nearer to him.
Click to expand...

Its hard to see that when you have been putting up with crap ur whole life, bro.

Don't bother saying stuff like this to her atm. She's just gna hammer you with her rant-o matic 3000.
 
everyones been through lows and "emptiness" and "darkness" and "sadness"

and the only solace was achieved through patience during such times.
 

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