converts marriage problem

[Lisa921]

Assalamu alaykum
I can't find anyone suitable to marry whom my parents like. They always eliminate anyone foreign no matter what and will not talk to him. I find this creates a hardship for me in marriage as I will not marry someone who is not connected to my parents and gets along with them. I am sorry to the people who disagree and think its not necessary but to me it is since we marry into a family not just a person. Well rounded people get along with their in laws and its a big red flag for me if the person I intend to marry doesn't care about my family or try to get to know them.
I have had many proposals in the last few months but nobody shows any respect to my elders and sisters/brothers. I think this is the reason my parents refuse a foreign groom. They need to approach my family still. its part of my culture in the west too. its not just an eastern thing!! I think these uncouth people who are so rudely accosting me for marriage need to learn some etiquette.
Sorry rant over...pffff

 

[greenhill]

Couldn't agree more!

eace:

 

[strivingobserver98]

:wa:

My time is nearly coming up, so this thread made me nervous lol.

Do you find religious potentials tend to respect family/parents more? Or is there no correlation?

May Allah bless us all with righteous pious spouses, ameen.

 

[Lisa921]

I wish I could say no but unfortunately it is religious guys that misuse religion as an excuse for laziness. Saying some nonsense about me marrying myself and ignoring my parents totally.
I'm fed up
Tempted to find an white guy because they would respect my family

 

[Lisa921]

Really seriously think I will never marry because there's a shortage of Muslim male converts

 

[رحمه]

وعليكم السلام ورحمة الله وبركاته

Ask God to remove sorrow

Say in the morning and evening every day

Invocation sorrow

(لا اله الا الله العظيم الحليم )
(لا اله الا الله رب العرش العظيم)
(لا اله الا الله رب السموات ورب الارض ورب العرش الكريم)

La Alh Ala Allh Al-azym Al-hlym
La Alh Ala Allh Rb Alrsh Al-azym
La Alh Ala Allh Rb Al-smwat Wrb Al-ard Wrb Al-arsh Al-krym


God willing, go awayproblem



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[Lisa921]

Jazak Allah I will write it down

 

[Lisa921]

I am not lazy either.I worked two jobs this summer and I'm going to college and working. I'm hard working self sufficient and do not plan to sponge off anyone but still cannot find a decent respectful brother to share life

 

[strivingobserver98]

I am not lazy either.I worked two jobs this summer and I'm going to college and working. I'm hard working self sufficient and do not plan to sponge off anyone but still cannot find a decent respectful brother to share life

What avenues of searching have you been through so far? Just family?

 

[Lisa921]

Salaam alaykum
I have tried asking an imam to search for me, I have asked around with friends, and I have searched online.
I think someone might have made dua for me today because I received a message from this muslim marriage site. He looks very nice in my opinion and he is willing to come and meet me and my family...so Alhamdulillah....Thank you to whoever out there who prayed for me. I am taking this potential mate seriously and we update you IF there is progress.
Lisa

 

[strivingobserver98]

:wa:

That's good alhamdulilah. Keep searching. I have a relative who was searching for 10+ years nearly losing hope. Then through a friend in a wedding he met the perfect person and now they are happily married with 2 kids. Never lose hope or give up, when someone comes along it's like you never expected it .

Yes definitely keep us updated on your progress. :thumbs_up