Correct Behavior Against Incompetency based lie and cheatcompansate

[Çay Tarikatı]

Selamun aleykum,

Either I am very strict on these matters or enormous amount of people is cheating in exams, in state related documents , in money issues etc...

The recurring phenomenon I see and confront is that, because of lack of analytic intelligence and critical thinking , plans fail , people feels week they either switch the content of what they promised or cheat on a matter parallel to it to compensate the loss due to lack of emotional and analytic intelligence. Their decisions are cosistently really bad for even them self and me. Such decisions almost always occur because of their very weak long term memory, and I get influenced by losing trust in them. They also try to manipulate me a lot with sad and regretful eyes, when I explain them how they are hurting my trust by forgetting how things are spoken and events are shaped in last days, months and years.

When I face such thing , I know that dynamics of this world would punish the owner of such behaviors. I warn them, I confront them , I explain them how these behaviors make them weak in the long run (I explain the dynamic so good, I believe that I wont even need to mention it as a sin.).

However I cant decide if I label them as liars and cheaters , weak-stupid people not to care about and behave accordingly (strategically) or thinking that they are weak beyond their will - due to reasons such as early educational issues, recurring constant stress causing things such as bad marriage or smoking or mal-adaptive social behavior.

I have lost lots of time and energy on people which are very problematic. I dont get angry because I know its a weakness. I usually leave as soon as my will starts getting consumed by all theseç I cant progress my work life, marital life and others by leaving everyone and every institution in couple of years...

The problem is mine. My life is getting harder and harder isolating myself in years and I meet more outliers as I progress. I am 33 years old , I have quit many jobs , I have quit academic degrees (several) due the misguidance of authority. Started and closed many firms due to such problems. And I couldn't find a wife who has not twisted her conceptual understanding due to cover her indulgence ...

According to Islamic behavioral discipline;
Do I accept and try to compensate for them or do I label them as stupid liars and cheaters and act accordingly ?
Am I too strict ? Should I commit some sins or do some counterproductive stupid things to loosen up ? I cant find the answers. I think maybe something is wrong with me. WISC-R tests are saying that I am very smart but I feel very stupid...

 

[ardianto]

Wa'alaikumsalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

I have experienced many failures in my life, but I always tried to introspect myself and analyze the mistake that i have done. Then I do my effort again in the better way. This is what you should do.

Don't be ashamed to admit that you have failed in your last effort because the first step to rise from failure is admit that you have failed. Don't be reluctant to introspect yourself and analyze your failure because this is what you should do if you want to do your effort again in better way.

Try to focus in developing yourself, and stop observing other people behaviour and blame them for your failure.

 

[greenhill]

It seems the way of the world is right now as you have described it.

In most cases if you want to follow the 'right' way you will have to 'swim against the current'. The way the secular world has ingrained itself into our very way of life makes it an uphill struggle with almost every step that we take to follow 'ihdinas sirotol mustaqiim'.

When the world lives with riba', how do we avoid? When the muslim leaders fail to provide alternatives to the ways of 'ghoyril maghdu bi'alaihiim waladdoliin' we will have our own battles to fight. These battles will be fired from our own conscience. As they say, the weakest form of eeman is that we resist the act with our heart. On this note, I recently came across an article which says there are two extreme possibilities for this, (in the case of extremes, here) we resist until death as it is 'haraam' or we succumb, resist with the heart, as we are weak and oppressed, but seek forgiveness from Allah that we have transgressed and that Allah may improve our situation.

At the end of the day, you see the world through your own distinct eyes and you carry your own conscience concluded by your own understanding of the laws and the 'spirit' of living. Pray to Allah that he opens a way that is best for you and pray also that he will give you the hidayah to 'see' and recognise it when it comes.

eace: