Destiny

[anonymous]

Hi all,

Has Allah chosen who we marry?

 

[anonymous]

Brother hamza please provide me with an answer

 

[aadil77]

Masha'Allah bless brother Hamza, he has made a name for himself in this section ;D

 

[anonymous]

Lol....
Mashallah he has. He uses quotes from Quran and his Anderson are purely based on that!
I would also like to say wonderful people are in this forumn providing help & support to one another....

But I still would like 2 know if who we marry are they who Allah chooses or our own choice. I haven't had lick on this path of my life and just need more of an Islamic insight 2 it

 

[anonymous]

That's meant to say answer not Anderson lol

 

[Ramadhan]

Of course like everything else, nothing happens if Allah does not will it and nothing will ever happen without Allah knows about it. And the question of destiny falls under qada and qadar. The subject is quite complex and I don't pretend I understand it, but here's a good read on qada' and qadar: http://www.dinimizislam.com/mobile/detail_en.asp?id=5984

But, if you were asking if our spouse was already fixed for us when our ruh was blown into our mother's womb, then the simple answer is: No.
This is based on a hadith shahih:

On the authority of Abdullah bin Masud, who said : the messenger of Allah, and he is the truthful, the believed narrated to us : p "Verily the creation of each one of you is brought together in his mother's belly for forty days in the form of seed, then he is a clot of blood for a like period, then a morsel of flesh for a like period, then there is sent to him the angel who blows the breath of life into him and who is commanded about four matters: to write down his means of livelihood, his life span, his actions, and whether happy or unhappy. By Allah, other than Whom there is no god, verily one of you behaves like the people of Paradise until there is but an arm's length between him and it, and that which has been written over takes him and so he behaves like the people of Hell-fire and thus he enters it; and one of you behaves like the people of Hell-fire until there is but an arm's length between him and it, and that which has been written over takes him and so he behaves like the people of Paradise and thus he enters it."
related by Bukhari and Muslim

 

[ardianto]

Edited.

Please delete.

 

[Ramadhan]

Rasulullah (saw) said "Life-partner, rizk (fortune) and death are on the hand of Allah".

I've read that this hadith is either weak/fabricated.
Can you please provide details of this hadith?

 

[Salahudeen]

I've often wondered this and tell myself that all the rejections I get are just Allah's way of guiding me to the correct person and eventually I will meet the person Allah wants me to be with. But this is just my thought I don't have proof or anything.

But in saying that, I know people who never got married at all and they're 36 now I don't think they'll ever meet the right person imsad inshaAllah Allah quickly blesses us with a partner who is just what we need ameen.

 

[ardianto]

I've read that this hadith is either weak/fabricated.
Can you please provide details of this hadith?

Please delete my post. The source is only from few local Ulama who say, that's hadith. But I think that's not authentic.

Thanks to remind me. Jazak Allahu Khayr.

 

[anonymous]

Yes what I meant to ask was has Allah chosen who we marry (fixed)

I know dua changes quadr and that the day you r born, when u die and how much money we make is already fixed and something you cannot change!


So in the Quran it says Allah created a soul n spilt it into two....What does that mean?
There's another quote which goes something like wife's are made from men... Don't quote me on this one but it's something along those lines.


See I have met a lot of brothers but none seem suitable so i just feel Allah has decided on some one better for me.....

 

[Hamza Asadullah]

Hi all,

Has Allah chosen who we marry?

Asalaamu Alaikum,

Jazakallahu khayr for your question. The following will answer your question:

Marriage or anything else in this life occurs only according to Divine Decree. It does not mean that a person has no will of his own. In fact, human beings have their own willpower and based on that they choose what they desire. However, their will is subject to the will of Allah and His Decision. Allah does not force any one on a matter but it is also true that no one can act contrary to Allah’s Decision. This rule applies to marriage and all the other matters. The person carries it out with his free choice and it is also from the Divine Decree of Allah. Know that what Allah has decided and decreed cannot be known before its occurrence; it is only known after the incident.

Therefore, not getting married to one’s truly beloved person or marrying an abusive husband is due to one’s will. It is also from the Divine Decree of Allah.
In brief, all that happens is due to the Divine Decree of Allah but Allah has made means and causes for any action; human beings choose the reason through their own will and get the result accordingly.

We ask Allah to grant you goodness, and well-being.

Allah knows best.

Source: http://www.islamweb.net/emainpage/index.php?page=showfatwa&Option=FatwaId&Id=87517

 

[Ramadhan]

So in the Quran it says Allah created a soul n spilt it into two....What does that mean?

I think I have weak memory, but I cannot remember such ayat. Which qur'an verse is that?

 

[anonymous]

Sorry that still doesn't make sense:

Can I give few examples and can you explain:

1. If there is person a person b and person c and I choose person a, is that my own choice or wa I meant o marry person a, or is it both?

2. If I love someone but but we don't Marry as parents forbid, is that due to Allah or choice?

 

[Ramadhan]

Sorry that still doesn't make sense:

What doesn't make sense?

1. If there is person a person b and person c and I choose person a, is that my own choice or wa I meant o marry person a, or is it both?

I don't know, and I don't think anyone who's still alive know 100% the answer too. It's a matter of qada and qadar.
You can go till the end of time asking similar questions:
1. if there there's universities a, b, and c, and I choose university a, is that my own choice or is it meant that I go to university a, or both?
2. if there there's jobs a, b, and c, and I accept a, is that my own choice or is it meant that I accept job a, or both?
3 ....
4 ....

Just look at our choices, evaluate which one is best for us, ask our family/friends for advice if need be, and do istikhara before making important decision and ask Allah that your decision will be best for you in this dunya and akhirah, and it should be good enough for us Insha Allah.

2. If I love someone but but we don't Marry as parents forbid, is that due to Allah or choice?

We are responsible for and take consequences for decisions we make. As long as we base our actions within Islam and as long as we have the right niyat and sincerity and as long as we ask Allah for guidance, then it should be sufficient insha Allah.

 

[Ramadhan]

By the way, you haven't answered my question about qur'an ayat that you said Allah split soul into two.

 

[anonymous]

Sorry what I meant to say was Allah creates things in pairs;

"O mankind! Be careful of your duty to your Lord Who created you from a single soul and from it created its mate and from them twain hath spread abroad a multitude of men and women." (An-Nisaa':1)

"O mankind! We created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female." (Al-Hujurat: 13)

"And that He createth the two spouses, the male and the female." (An-Najm: 45)



Source: http://www.zawaj.com/articles/sex_change_ruling.html

 

[Ramadhan]

Sorry what I meant to say was Allah creates things in pairs;

"O mankind! Be careful of your duty to your Lord Who created you from a single soul and from it created its mate and from them twain hath spread abroad a multitude of men and women." (An-Nisaa':1)

"O mankind! We created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female." (Al-Hujurat: 13)

"And that He createth the two spouses, the male and the female." (An-Najm: 45)

Oh, these verses. The interpretation of the verses is that we all are descendants from nabi Adam (as) and siti Hawa (as) and that men and women are meant to be for each other as mates, and the verses do not mean that we have a specific/particular "soul mate" reserved for us.
let me give you an illustration: when I was still far from Islam, I had a girlfriend, and I really thought she was my soul mate and I was truly devastated when she died from an accident and thought I wouldn't meet any one else and I would die alone. But a little over a year, I was already in another relationships, and again, I thought she was the one as well, until we broke up. lol.

 

[anonymous]

So Allah hasn't made us in pairs then? Would be easy if it was lol

 

[Salahudeen]

Oh, these verses. The interpretation of the verses is that we all are descendants from nabi Adam (as) and siti Hawa (as) and that men and women are meant to be for each other as mates, and the verses do not mean that we have a specific/particular "soul mate" reserved for us.
let me give you an illustration: when I was still far from Islam, I had a girlfriend, and I really thought she was my soul mate and I was truly devastated when she died from an accident and thought I wouldn't meet any one else and I would die alone. But a little over a year, I was already in another relationships, and again, I thought she was the one as well, until we broke up. lol.

Isn't it strange how at the time when we lose someone we can't ever imagine living without that person and then a year later we are able to get on with life. But when it first happens we're devastated.