Divorce

[Mariam19]

Assalamu Alaikum,

I married my husband 8 months ago. We have been having problems and my parents do not approve of him because he is a convert. My parents wanted me to come back and since he had to move away for financial reasons for just a couple of months, we decided to be away for awhile because I have to attend college.

One day I got upset with him and told him that I was going to leave, he got mad at me and wrote in a piece of paper that he divorces me and he signs it. I took the paper with me but I knew he only wrote it because I was threatening to leave him. Anyways, I came to my parents home to cool down and my mom and my sister saw that letter and read it. They did not say anything to me until now. I did not think anything of it. I just came back home from his house a couple of days ago and told my parents that I would not be with him anymore but of course me and him decided to stay apart until he comes back. I just want to know, since he wrote that letter and signed it, and since I told my parents I would not stay with him, and since both my mom and my sister read it as two witnesses, does that mean that we are divorced?

 

[Alpha Dude]

Wa alaykum salam,

Ask a trustworthy shaykh in your locality. As I understand, for divorce, witnesses aren't a necessity. It may be that this paper divorce is considered as one revocable divorce but best to get it clarified from a mufti.

 

[Yanal]

Assalamu Alaikum,

I married my husband 8 months ago. We have been having problems and my parents do not approve of him because he is a convert. My parents wanted me to come back and since he had to move away for financial reasons for just a couple of months, we decided to be away for awhile because I have to attend college.

One day I got upset with him and told him that I was going to leave, he got mad at me and wrote in a piece of paper that he divorces me and he signs it. I took the paper with me but I knew he only wrote it because I was threatening to leave him. Anyways, I came to my parents home to cool down and my mom and my sister saw that letter and read it. They did not say anything to me until now. I did not think anything of it. I just came back home from his house a couple of days ago and told my parents that I would not be with him anymore but of course me and him decided to stay apart until he comes back. I just want to know, since he wrote that letter and signed it, and since I told my parents I would not stay with him, and since both my mom and my sister read it as two witnesses, does that mean that we are divorced?

Asalam alaikum,

You may have to speak with a imaam regarding this issue,as I'm not sure. Perhaps someone that has more knowledge can help you,insha'Allaah. May Allah make things better for you and your family,ameen.

 

[جوري]

Is a divorce what you want though or do you feel pressured to seek a divorce because you feel your family don't approve? Is he a good husband to you despite the usual rift between couples and bad finances?

best,

 

[Ramadhan]

If my memory serves me right, Rasulullah SAW said that there are two things which we cannot and must not joke about: to say "i marry you" and "I divorce you", because even an utterance of " i divorce you" is already considered valid even though there's no witnesses etc.
As others have said, please ask your local imam, but it does seem you have gone one revocable divorce (one talaq), so in that case a re-marrying is not necessary, but your husband must have intention to take you back again as his wife for you to re-continue the marriage.

 

[YusufNoor]

May Allah make it easy on you. a question, which it may help to consider, is did you reconcile within your iddah? IF you did, you may be OK. please look at all angles of the situation. you MAY overlook something of benefit. give the Shaykh you speak with ALL of the information.

:wa:

 

[Ramadhan]

my edit doesnt seem to be working, just an after thought:
I actually don't know if you have to re-do the nikkah after one talaq, and you definitely need to consult a scholar.