Do I HAVE to ask forgiveness?

[AnonymousPoster]

My dad hasn’t spoken to me for 10 years because I did some st*pid things in the past and he has never forgiven me. OK, here’s the problem, I’ve never actually asked him to forgive me and I’m so scared to go in front of him. If I never ask him forgiveness, will I go to Hell?

I mean yes it’s easy for people to say ‘it’s better to have tried even if he doesn’t forgive you’ but only I know what my dad is like. He’s never been a ‘father’, even when we were growing up he was always beating my mum and us, for know reason whatsoever except that he couldn’t find his socks, we were making too much noise in the garden, mum going to the shops, how can you beat someone for these reasons?

OK, he’s my father and I should never say bad about him but I’ve always hated him cos of the way he is. He was never practicing, he only started practicing a few years ago and even then, he only goes to go the masjid for fights and politics and all that cr@p!

I really don’t want to feel st*pid standing in front of him and he starts getting violent, or even worse, starts on my mum once I’ve left (if I get out of there alive that is). :exhausted

Will I go to hell if I don't ask forgiveness?

 

[glo]

I can't give you Islamic advice, but I wonder if you only ask your father's forgiveness for fear of punishment in hell, would it be a sincere and real request for forgiveness at all?

Doesn't forgiveness need to start with feelings of remorse and sorrow?
Do you feel sorry for what you have done to your father?

Also, have you forgiven your father for the things he has done wrong?
Perhaps that's something else you need to think about.

If you are scared to face your father, perhaps you could write him a letter instead? Or talk on the phone?

 

[Muslim Woman]

Salaam/Peace

... He’s never been a ‘father’, even when we were growing up he was always beating my mum and us,

May Allah forgive him but u must treat your parents with kindness . Even if parents are non-Muslims , u will listen to them ( except if they order to disobey God ) , take care of them etc.

Make dua for dad and for yourself . Try to use this blessed month to establish a good relationship with him . InshaAllah , you 2 will be able to forget what went wrong in the past .

May Allah bless you .

 

[AnonymousPoster]

Salaam/Peace



May Allah forgive him but u must treat your parents with kindness . Even if parents are non-Muslims , u will listen to them ( except if they order to disobey God ) , take care of them etc.

Make dua for dad and for yourself . Try to use this blessed month to establish a good relationship with him . InshaAllah , you 2 will be able to forget what went wrong in the past .

May Allah bless you .

I wish it was that simple.

 

[AnonymousPoster]

Salaam/Peace



May Allah forgive him but u must treat your parents with kindness . Even if parents are non-Muslims , u will listen to them ( except if they order to disobey God ) , take care of them etc.

Make dua for dad and for yourself . Try to use this blessed month to establish a good relationship with him . InshaAllah , you 2 will be able to forget what went wrong in the past .

May Allah bless you .

No, to be honest, it wouldn't be sincere repentence, because deep down i still hate him, and yes i only asked because i am scared of going to Hell. imsad

 

[UmmSqueakster]

Assalamu Alaikum,

When you make dua, ask Allah (swt) to put forgiveness towards your dad in your heart.

Then, when you truly do feel sorry for what you did, write him a letter. If he forgives you, great. If not, well, you tried.

 

[Sari]

It's a confusing situation as you don't actually want to make amends with him, you just want him to forgive you? Do you know for sure if your dad really hasn't changed yet?

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

people can change believe it or not

ive seen the most hard headed stonecold people change - it CAN happen

if i was you i would DEFINITLY ask for forgiveness


without a SHADOW OF A DOUBT

 

[Sari]

I agree, also you could be the one who brings about the change. Seeing/hearing you ask for forgiveness with all sincerity, might be something he's never experienced, especially from you. It could soften his heart. And then if you kept visiting him and spending time around him with patience and respect, no matter how he acts, it might help him change.