Domestic Violence: Why Women Endure?

Status
Not open for further replies.
This I assume is fashioned after the Tarasoff law from the U.S where you've a duty to protect and a duty to warn after a psychopath told his counselor he wanted to kill his GF and eventually did!

Prevention is better than a cure as they say in this case there's no coming back from death or permanent brain damage..
 
Salaam,

TrueStranger said:
That is so true, except the only difference between men and women is that he could easily divorce her and society will not stigmatize him. And more importantly, there is a huge disparity between the level of violence inflicted on women and men.

Men abuse women on a higher rate and level than women abuse men. The problem is more severe for the female gender and society really isn't doing much.
Click to expand...

I don't rely on statistics. The only reason why it is believed men abuse women on a higher rate because women find it easier to report these issues. Most men are too embarrassed to report it.


CosmicPathos said:
and he can continue on feeling like **** for the rest of his life that a woman he loved and married betrayed him? you make it sound like eating a cheese cake and moving on after divorcing her. At the very least he lost his mahr money. and lost the respect in front of his family and friends and colleagues that he let a woman stab a dagger in his back.

maybe that is why deep down I do have some concerns for the bent rib of Adam.

its a problem for both genders and parroting things like "will not stimgatize him" highlights your psychosis and loss of contact with reality.

good day.
Click to expand...

I would say it would leave a emotional scar and hard to move on.

I have to admit, I know this is very wrong, but if my wife slapped me, I would get extremely angry. I would probably throw her out of the window or something terrible. O_o
 
Last edited:
ßlµêßêll said:


Yesterday I happened upon an anonymous post circa 2008-2009 which I believe was written by now a banned member & considering her other post on imposing an age limit for marriage (which I don't personally agree with) as one size doesn't fit all for all societies but I digress and with her last post I concluded something rather horrific took place in her life. She stands today banned and in lieu of members offering a root cause analysis to what she was feeling or thinking (mind you this is a Muslim) not a Muslim on a cusp not a kaffir looking to vilify & troll rather someone whose opinion was very much shaped by her events and whatever little condolence or help she was seeking was nipped in the bud in a most vile manner which I didn't expect at all from Muslims let alone people that I'd otherwise have tremendous respect for.
I am hurt of what transpired and I am hurt for her. I only pray Allah swt shows her aright and accompanies her as she seems to be fighting many negative forces on every front and under threat to that which is obviously most valuable to her which is her child..

:w:
Click to expand...

I have learned the hard way. Muslims are humans who are capable of making enormous mistakes and placing a high value on their opinion could put you in a very uncomfortable situation when certain socially constructed issues arise. I have repeatedly said that we should try to understand people's conditions from multiple view points, and not solely from an Islamic point of view. That is one important factor, but we should at least try our best to fully understand the structure of everyone's problem. And because of that I'm very hesitant when it comes to commenting on the advice section.

May Allah guide her and protect her child wherever she might be today. Ameen
 
ßlµêßêll said:
This I assume is fashioned after the Tarasoff law from the U.S where you've a duty to protect and a duty to warn after a psychopath told his counselor he wanted to kill his GF and eventually did!

Prevention is better than a cure as they say in this case there's no coming back from death or permanent brain damage..
Click to expand...

What about the woman who says she will cut off the reproductive organ of her husband and everyone laughs about it.

California woman cuts off husband's penis

A US woman drugged her estranged husband, tied him to a bed and cut off his penis, police in California say.

The woman then threw the penis into the waste disposal and told police who attended the incident in Garden Grove, near Los Angeles: "He deserved it."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-14131133
Click to expand...

No prevention for the sake of men, when it happens it happens
Woman bites off boyfriend's testicles
A woman who admitted biting off her boyfriend's testicles has been warned she could be jailed.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/8849887/Woman-bites-off-boyfriends-testicles.html
Click to expand...

could be jailed? they cannot decide whether to jail her or not, subhanaAllah
 
Last edited:
Cbdullahii said:
What about the woman who says she will cut off the reproductive organ of her husband and everyone laughs about it.



No prevention for the sake of men, when it happens it happens
Click to expand...

Brother, men don't report their abuse because other men laugh at them. I know of a woman who was arrested because she was chasing her husband around the apartment with a knife. It was men who were laughing at him, and the overwhelming majority of women stood with the husband. Everyone knows she is the crazy one and is labeled as such.

This problem will be solved if men and women condemned the wrong person regardless of their gender.
 
TrueStranger said:
LOL! My thought exactly.

If your wife slaps you, then that marriage was over before that slap landed on your face.
Click to expand...

LOL, I really do not know. I would be so angry, but I would never raise my hand. I hope I get along with my future wife.:heated:
 
Cbdullahii said:
What about the woman who says she will cut off the reproductive organ of her husband and everyone laughs about it.
Click to expand...

That should go under:
Domestic Violence: why men endure?

Different psychology & certainly worthy of its own thread.

:w:
 
Allah<3 said:
LOL, I really do not know. I would be so angry, but I would never raise my hand. I hope I get along with my future wife.:heated:
Click to expand...

I'm just glad I grew up in a house where problems were never solved using the hand.

Rule # 1, if someone is mad, remain silent, nod your head, and put distance between the two of you. ;D
 
ßlµêßêll said:
are you a misogynist?
You'd be ok with your wife to be reading some of the posts you have here? would your mom or sisters if you have them be proud?
Click to expand...

I realized hatred was a word I did not want to use, hence I edited it. But I guess it was too late.

No I dont hate women just cuz they are women. But this thread is only adding to the stereotypes when it assumes that it is easier for men to move on from a divorce. Perhaps for some it is, for other it is not. Just like it is easy for some women to move on after a divorce, and hard for others. My relative died with the constant agony when his wife was having relationships with someone and he had ti divorce her. It was not so much that he needed her, it was that for the first time, apart from his real family parents and siblings, he trusted someone, and that trust was crushed and smashed and destroyed and annihilated. It was an attack on his ego from someone for whom he purposely he let his guards down, and it was not easy to move on, no matter what lies truestranger spreads.
 
Last edited:
CosmicPathos said:
I realized hatred was a word I did not want to use, hence I edited it. But I guess it was too late.

No I dont hate women just cuz they are women. But this thread is only adding to the stereotypes when it assumes that it is easier for men to move on from a divorce. Perhaps for some it is, for other it is not. Just like it is easy for some women to move on after a divorce, and hard for others. My relative died in agony when his wife was having relationships with someone and he had ti divorce her. It was not so much that he needed her, it was that for the first time, apart from his real family parents and siblings, he trusted someone, and that trust was crushed and smashed and destroyed and annihilated.
Click to expand...

You're a good guy deep inside & I pray insha'Allah that Allah swt blesses you with a good loving pious woman that you'll feel this same fervency & urge to kill for the way you do on many of your threads here..

But I hope you see that everyone has a story that helped shaped their beliefs..

:w:
 
CosmicPathos said:
I realized hatred was a word I did not want to use, hence I edited it. But I guess it was too late.

No I dont hate women just cuz they are women. But this thread is only adding to the stereotypes when it assumes that it is easier for men to move on from a divorce. Perhaps for some it is, for other it is not. Just like it is easy for some women to move on after a divorce, and hard for others. My relative died in agony when his wife was having relationships with someone and he had ti divorce her. It was not so much that he needed her, it was that for the first time, apart from his real family parents and siblings, he trusted someone, and that trust was crushed and smashed and destroyed and annihilated.
Click to expand...

Correction: It's not easier for men to move away from a divorce, it is easier for them to leave an abusive relationship. There isn't a single human who has monopoly over trust values. One wrong does not excuse another wrong.
 
ßlµêßêll said:


You're a good guy deep inside & I pray insha'Allah that Allah swt blesses you with a good loving pious woman that you'll feel this same fervency & urge to kill for the way you do on many of your threads here..

But I hope you see that everyone has a story that helped shaped their beliefs..

:w:
Click to expand...

:wa:

On the surface, he's cold, but deep down, he's a huggable teddy bear. :statisfie

Enough of me being weird. I wonder why men abuse their wives in the first place.
 
ßlµêßêll said:


You're a good guy deep inside & I pray insha'Allah that Allah swt blesses you with a good loving pious woman that you'll feel this same fervency & urge to kill for the way you do on many of your threads here..

But I hope you see that everyone has a story that helped shaped their beliefs..

:w:
Click to expand...

same prayers for you sister,

jazkallah khair.

salam
 
UK: Two women a week die in the hands of their partner. Dead women don’t report crimes. So please stay on topic. The fact is more women suffer from DV and if you want to take into account unreported crimes of men, please also take into account unreported crimes of women too. Women will still make up majority of victims in DV. Men are able to divorce their wives without stigma attached to them by society and are not financial dependent on their partner. Divorce may emotionally affect men but they don’t have stigma of society to deal with unlike their female counterpart. Either way violence towards your partner is not right. Plus the video posted, at the bottom says violent partners will be evicted; it doesn’t particularly say men will be evicted. Violence towards women around the world is epidemic. Stop trying to downplay that.


 
Last edited:
purple said:
UK: Two women a week die in the hands of their partner. Dead women don’t report crimes. So please stay on topic. The fact is more women suffer from DV and if you want to take into account unreported crimes of men, please also take into account unreported crimes of women too. Women will still make up majority of victims in DV. Men are able to divorce their wives without stigma attached to them by society and are not financial dependent on their partner. Divorce may emotionally affect men but they don’t have stigma of society to deal with unlike their female counterpart. Either way violence towards your partner is not right. Plus the video posted, at the bottom says violent partners will be evicted; it doesn’t particularly say men will be evicted. Violence towards women around the world is epidemic. Stop trying to downplay that.
Click to expand...

Salaam,

None of us are aware about which gender has a higher DV rate. This is because not everyone is going to report them. Statistics do not reveal everything.

Men have a difficult chance of seeing their children after divorce in the UK. So men can have a hard time as well. In addition, I have seen cases where the women has accused their ex-husband of rape and make their life very difficult.

It is a lot easier for the women to appear to be the victim.
 
I think the bruises speak for themselves. Again, if you do not believe in statistics, and you do not accept the data that is available, then what evidence are you using to claim that men are as equally abused by women or more?

I'm sure there is a problem men deal with as well, but please don't compare apples with oranges.
 
Tragic Typos said:
Salaam,

None of us are aware about which gender has a higher DV rate. This is because not everyone is going to report them. Statistics do not reveal everything.

Men have a difficult chance of seeing their children after divorce in the UK. So men can have a hard time as well. In addition, I have seen cases where the women has accused their ex-husband of rape and make their life very difficult.

It is a lot easier for the women to appear to be the victim.
Click to expand...

If it is easier for women to appear to be the victim, then why the low level of conviction for rape?
Dead women don’t report DV. 2 women a week die on the hands of their partner which far more then men being killed by their partner. Can you explain this statistics?
Men might have difficult time having custody of their children, but there are a lot more people complaining about that.
Men might have hard time when accused of rape but what about those where their rapist get away with rape?




 
Last edited:
you said society gives stigma. well that society contains a number fo females. So females having stigma agaisnt females. go deal with them yourself before blaming men.

good day.​
Click to expand...

please address my points in this thread to Comicpathos.

Men are also part of the problem. Most will not marry divorced women as someone already mentioned in this thread. People are trying to downplay the level of violence towards women by playing "it happens to men too". Most DV organisations do extend their hands to men that suffer DV and shelters dont close their doors to men. Anyone thats speak against DV towards women, dont agree with DV towards men. I dont like both but will not downplay one to benefit the other.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar Threads

Back
Top