I'm always feeling real stressed and down, heck sometimes suicidal (not contemplating it at a SERIOUS level, but the thought crosses my mind) I don't know why, but I just feel real angry and depressed all the time. The only thing I find solace in is listening to rock music, as its depressing in itself. I don't even feel like praying namaaz, even if I have the time and opportunity
Seriously though, I don't want my only comfort to come from music, I want to know ways to deal with this Islamically? I seriously need some meaning in my life
MashaAllah. Despite everything you are going through, I find it beautiful and commendable that you are seeking islamic advice for your troubles.
Alhumdullilah, Allah has protected you from poverty, oppression and many other sufferings that millions are facing every day. This alone should compel one to bow down to Allah in gratitude and worship. Sadly, sometimes the value of Allah's blessings are not realised unless we are bereft of them. Can we even measure the value of one breath we take?
That one breath to say alhumdulillah and get countless rewards in return. Or the one breath in which to say astaghfirullah and if Allah wills, have our entire sins forgiven. While no amount of gratitude on our part will equal what Allah has given us, we must never fail to show Him how grateful we truly are.
In Islam, the purpose of life on earth is the worship of Allah (swt) and obedience to His commands in our daily actions:
(Quran, 51: 56-58)"I have only created jinns and men, that they may serve Me. No sustenance do I require of them, nor do I require that they should feed Me. For Allah is He who gives (all) sustenance * Lord of Power * steadfast (forever)."
Ibadah (worship of Allah) is a means for the purification of man's soul and his practical life. When we turn away from worshipping Allah, our life becomes devoid of Allah's blessings that protect and shield us from shaytaan's destruction. Ibadah doesn't end on observing the five pillars of Islam. Acquiring knowledge of deen, being thankful to Allah, abstaining from sin, fulfilling the rights of others, making duaa for others, speakingly humbly, not backbiting, helping others for the sake of Allah, showing kindness to parents, kith and kin, concealing someone's fault, repenting for your sins, fearing Allah and being mindful of everything you do according to the shariah are all forms of ibadah.
When we go out in the cold we wrap up with warm clothing for protection, yet we forget that until we cloak ourselves within the folds of Islam, we will become easy prey for the shaytaan like a gazelle to a lion on the open plains.
Seek protection from all that is harmful to you by worshipping Allah. Once you submit yourself to Allah, He will take care of your matters as He knows best. InshaAllah, the darkness will vanish, as will the suicidal feelings. The depression you feel now will be replaced with hope and contentment. The meaning of life isn't complicated that it needs to be deciphered. This life is like a prep school. Your chance to prepare for the life in the here-after.
(Quran, 23:116) "What! Did you think that we have created you without purpose, and that you would not be brought back to Us?"
Start by ditching the rock music in favour of Quranic recitation with translations. Listen to the words of Allah not only with your ears but also with your heart. Let your ears hear the Divine Truth revealed to our beloved Prophet (pbuh) over fourteen hundred years ago and without a single word changed over time. How blessed are we alhumdullilah that we are muslims.
Sit alone and ponder over the meaning of your existence. Open your heart to Allah. Share your fears and sorrows. He is the greatest counsellor. He will hear the cries from within you. No one can help you more. No one can give you more. No one can care more than Allah. Don't turn away from Him. You don't need an appointment, there's no waiting list. He is there for you every second. Please beg for His help. He will never let you down.
(Qur’an 21:187).“And when My servants ask you concerning Me, (tell them) I am indeed near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls.”
(Qur’an 40:60). “And your Lord said, invoke Me and I will respond to your invocation.”
“Be mindful of Allah and Allah will protect you. Be mindful of Allah and you will find Him in front of you. If you ask, ask only Allah and if you seek help, seek help only from Allah. And know that if all the nations were to gather together to benefit you, they would benefit you only with something that Allah had already prescribed for you, and if they gather together to harm you, they would harm you only with something that Allah had already prescribed for you. The pens have been lifted and the pages are dry.” (Tirmidhi).
Please do not give up. We can't change our past, but the changes we make today will affect our future. Strive to seek knowledge of deen - your duties as a muslim. Even if it's a little every day. We all want what's best for you and pray that Allah may have mercy on you and ease all the difficulties you are facing. Ameen.
