Hi, i feel embarrased to even ask such a question. But i need some help. I am supposed to have my nikkah with a man who recently confessed to me that he has watched p*** and has also masturb.- Due to stress. He prays, fasts and i honestly did not see this coming. I thought maybe when a boy is young he slips but to know that he watches and induldged in such acts has left me feeling uneasy. I told him how before me, he must fear Allah Swt. He was very guilty and said he will stop completly but it isnt easy, and he honestly had forgotten/lost sight of the magnitude of that sin. He prayed for repentence. But its only been a few days since all this has happend. I dont know how to even approach this situation. Do i still marry him knowing this, i dont know.
Fiancee and porn
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Salaam,
He must stay away from such act. Know that Allah is watching us, know what is in our heart. He should increase his taqwa by reading Quran, dikhr etc. He can ask Allah to help him and protect him from watching porn.
I think you should try to ask him to take break from internet Tell him to say astagfirullah when he gets bad thought. Ask Allah to protect him from such evil acts. He also should stay with good company only and stay away from any bad company.
JazakAllah.
He must stay away from such act. Know that Allah is watching us, know what is in our heart. He should increase his taqwa by reading Quran, dikhr etc. He can ask Allah to help him and protect him from watching porn.
I think you should try to ask him to take break from internet Tell him to say astagfirullah when he gets bad thought. Ask Allah to protect him from such evil acts. He also should stay with good company only and stay away from any bad company.
JazakAllah.
W/Salam Sister
First thing you need to do is do Istikhara. Ask Allah to help you.
Don't be surprised because majority of our youth is guilty of doing what your fiancée has done. However, this does not make it something permissible. I am just stating a fact. Some are open about it and others just hide it deep down within themselves. It is bad because these things leave many harmful effects on men including unstable mental, physical and emotional health. People who do this for extended periods of time, will most likely be abusive and can't have a healthy married life. All of this is the result of getting away from religion and getting married very late because for most of us career is more important that religion.
Most people don't share this dark side of theirs and they find so much pleasure in this that they keep doing this even after getting married. These are the people who have nothing to do with religion. They only go to pray on Eid and that's pretty much it.
However, there are also people who know they are committing sin and they keep their sins as a secret between them and their God. They repent sincerely and after marriage they get over this habit because after marriage they find halal means to fulfil their sexual desires. I think it was best for your fiancée to keep this to himself, ask Allah for forgiveness and hoping to over come this after marriage. This would have kept a positive image and respect of him in your mind.
We can still look at this as a positive sign. Your fiancée seems to be a good person. He is sincere and he preferred not to hide this from you which indicates that he is an honest person and will not hide things from you in future. We all make mistakes and no one is perfect. Instead of reacting negatively, may be take it as a positive sign. However, even if he shared this with you, you still need to know what is his plan to overcome this disease and how confident he is in getting rid of these bad habits after marriage? Only he or you can tell how much sincere he is and how much guilty he feels for doing what he has done. Answer to few question below may help you analyze this situation.
Since when he is practicing Islam? Does he pray all 5 prayers? Does he often go the mosque? Does he has a good company of Muslims who practice Islam? Where does Islam stand in his life and future goals? How often he reads Quran? Is he planning to go to Umrah after getting married? These are all important questions. If Islam is important for you then you need to make sure your fiancée and you are on the same page.
Knowing the answer to some of the questions I list above will help you to analyze whole situation. If he is now practicing Islam in true spirit then know that he is remorseful of what he has done. Just forgive him for the sake of Allah as Allah loves those who forgive others. May be he needs a good Muslima as a life partner who can put him on the right track. With that intention, you will get reward of all his good deeds. And make sure to go for Umrah after your marriage, this is better than honeymoon trip.
However, if this is something which truly bothers you and you think you can't get over this in future and it may have an impact on your relationship with your future husband then this is the time for you to discuss this with your fiancée and your parents. My advice is that life is not perfect and we always have challenges in life. However, if you show a big heart and forgive your fiancée, it will set a good ground of trust and love in future.
Also remember that husband and wife are like the garments we wear which mean there is no secret between them and it also means that we need to hide the faults and shortcomings of our significant others because that's one of the main purpose of wearing clothes.
First thing you need to do is do Istikhara. Ask Allah to help you.
Don't be surprised because majority of our youth is guilty of doing what your fiancée has done. However, this does not make it something permissible. I am just stating a fact. Some are open about it and others just hide it deep down within themselves. It is bad because these things leave many harmful effects on men including unstable mental, physical and emotional health. People who do this for extended periods of time, will most likely be abusive and can't have a healthy married life. All of this is the result of getting away from religion and getting married very late because for most of us career is more important that religion.
Most people don't share this dark side of theirs and they find so much pleasure in this that they keep doing this even after getting married. These are the people who have nothing to do with religion. They only go to pray on Eid and that's pretty much it.
However, there are also people who know they are committing sin and they keep their sins as a secret between them and their God. They repent sincerely and after marriage they get over this habit because after marriage they find halal means to fulfil their sexual desires. I think it was best for your fiancée to keep this to himself, ask Allah for forgiveness and hoping to over come this after marriage. This would have kept a positive image and respect of him in your mind.
We can still look at this as a positive sign. Your fiancée seems to be a good person. He is sincere and he preferred not to hide this from you which indicates that he is an honest person and will not hide things from you in future. We all make mistakes and no one is perfect. Instead of reacting negatively, may be take it as a positive sign. However, even if he shared this with you, you still need to know what is his plan to overcome this disease and how confident he is in getting rid of these bad habits after marriage? Only he or you can tell how much sincere he is and how much guilty he feels for doing what he has done. Answer to few question below may help you analyze this situation.
Since when he is practicing Islam? Does he pray all 5 prayers? Does he often go the mosque? Does he has a good company of Muslims who practice Islam? Where does Islam stand in his life and future goals? How often he reads Quran? Is he planning to go to Umrah after getting married? These are all important questions. If Islam is important for you then you need to make sure your fiancée and you are on the same page.
Knowing the answer to some of the questions I list above will help you to analyze whole situation. If he is now practicing Islam in true spirit then know that he is remorseful of what he has done. Just forgive him for the sake of Allah as Allah loves those who forgive others. May be he needs a good Muslima as a life partner who can put him on the right track. With that intention, you will get reward of all his good deeds. And make sure to go for Umrah after your marriage, this is better than honeymoon trip.
However, if this is something which truly bothers you and you think you can't get over this in future and it may have an impact on your relationship with your future husband then this is the time for you to discuss this with your fiancée and your parents. My advice is that life is not perfect and we always have challenges in life. However, if you show a big heart and forgive your fiancée, it will set a good ground of trust and love in future.
Also remember that husband and wife are like the garments we wear which mean there is no secret between them and it also means that we need to hide the faults and shortcomings of our significant others because that's one of the main purpose of wearing clothes.
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If I was your mahram and i knew he was a masturbator, I would refuse bluntly speaking.
Obviously there are other factors like wether your involved in sexual deviancy and your level of religion and other circumstances.
Although its true most people do it these days religious people have higher expectations.
https://youtu.be/o0bRjaw9Sxo
This man speak alot of sense bearing in mind he is a christian
Ultimately the choice is yours
You know your circumstances best
Pray istikhara
And i ask that Allah blesses you and your future spouse in all your affairs
walaikum assalam rahmatullahi barakatuh
I'll say, don't marry him as porn is addictive and very hard to give up. Some people like to downplay this sin but this is one of the most deadly sins of all as it corrupts the heart
Just imagine, you'll be the spouse of a practicing Muslim, but his heart will be deseased and full of nifaq
I'll say, don't marry him as porn is addictive and very hard to give up. Some people like to downplay this sin but this is one of the most deadly sins of all as it corrupts the heart
Just imagine, you'll be the spouse of a practicing Muslim, but his heart will be deseased and full of nifaq
MaashAllah brother Habib has given a good reply, however let me add a possible reason for him admitting the porn and masturbation to you.... People who watch porn tend to think that everyone else must have pervy desires like them, so he may have wanted to arouse your interest in him....
I know your supposed to give a Muslim benefit of the doubt, but this is your entire future we're talking about, so every possibility has to be considered...
I've been on these boards for years now and have seen many sisters complain of how their practicing husbands promise they'll give it up but they get caught watching it again and again or just can't stop this habit
Istikhara can sometimes be misleading as one acts on a 'feeling' they get and feelings can be deceptive sometimes
So regarding your future, I think your decision about this should be based more on informed reasoning rather then Istikhara
I've been on these boards for years now and have seen many sisters complain of how their practicing husbands promise they'll give it up but they get caught watching it again and again or just can't stop this habit
Istikhara can sometimes be misleading as one acts on a 'feeling' they get and feelings can be deceptive sometimes
So regarding your future, I think your decision about this should be based more on informed reasoning rather then Istikhara
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yeah i guess thats the joke, i suppose your both young.. im not trying to patronize anyone.. being a young man myself
but when you get married ....and have to live with someone, a lot of things need to change, a lot of compromises need to be made and a lot of effort is needed to maintain your relationship.
none of us are perfect within ourselves so you can imagine how things may be when you have to share everything with another.
so only you can decide if you want to go through with it or not.
as for the problem, i feel it is very much a spiritual one..
i may be of the extreme here but as alcohol clouds the mind and leads to different thought processes and decision making, porn does very much the same thing.. im not just talking about how one perceives the opposite sex but rather the whole process of thinking and acting.
its like opening a door in the mind that should often stay closed and not many things should come to us through it.
it is also very much part of planning for the future and sending forward.. and as our souls are often inclined to be not as nice as we imagine...we really should be afraid of allah swt in this respect.
but some people are good and some people need to learn to be good, its just part of growing up.. if you consider one to be above the other does not matter really..
we all pray to make the right choices in life and to be happy with the decree of allah swt.
he already knows what he wants and you already know the problem, everybody knows the problem..
so lay down boundaries that are the solution.. be stern, let him know you dont want that from him, cut out the avenues used by him to feed his problem.. find the patterns and timing of use (when he does it) and then support him through it.
you hold all the cards so its a case of if and how you want to play the hand..
do your best.
xboxisdead
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It is time as a Muslim community to return back 1,400 years ago and follow the way of the sahaba and prophet peace be upon him. Did you know back in the time of sahaba and prophet peace be upon him the man talked to boys not like they are boys. They talked to boys as if they are man. IN fact, they did not call them by their names they called them by saying "Father Ahmed" or "Mother Fatima" even if that boy is only five years old. But at that time they called them as if they are parents already. This form of energy instill maturity and intelligence to these children so that when they grow up at age 10 years old they feel like they are 18 years old. This forces the brain to light in all areas and enhance memory and build in responsibility and good characters and even maturity. Ever wondered why a ten year old boy at that time is more maturer than a twenty year old man nowadays?
In fact, back then at the time of sahaba the 10 year old boy was so mature that he is fit to be a husband and a father marrying a 20 year old woman...vs a 20 year old man now marrying a 15 year old woman. Why? It s the upbringing and raising of the children by the parent and neglecting boys right. Spoiling them senseless and giving them everything they want and pampering them to me is a form of oppression. You cripple them for life.
Haraam! That is child abuse!
It is time at age five year old you call them father so they feel this inner sense of parenting somehow lingers into their veins, which forces their brain to GROW UP. Why am I rambling? Simple...when the boy reaches age 14...that is the age where his body is flooded with testosterone and desires then immediately this is the time where you should consider marrying him. Regardless of him achieving bachelor or not. By age 14 he should have some kind of job where he can generate income even if it is 800 dollars a month only...and he should get married ASAP and continue his education and improve himself. NOW HE WANTS TO HAVE this sexual release...he do it halaal way...we eliminate masturbation and pornography by an enormous amount! No stupid iphone, ipad and computers for him because he is sooo busy trying to study and work and raise a new family and his wife might get pregnant..so now he have to worry and consider how to raise his children....
his mind now is focused on something else....no more open for shaitaan to lure him to do haraam...he will be so exhausted, tired and busy being a husband and a father that doing porno is his last of concern....
AS LONG AS THE WIFE PROTECT HER HUSBAND'S right and go to bed to him when he needs it. HE SHOULD NOT HAVE TO CLIMB mountains to her by giving her cake, caaaandy, going out to restaurants....HAVE TO READ HER mind...please her...rub her feet...listen to her blaaable and be tested left and right and he have to do this and that...no...no no no...that negates marriage all together and make the very concept marriage redundant. He is horny, he have needs to meet...he calls his wife...she runs faster than light..make herself the most attractive person for him...smile for you...have sweet voice for him...laugh for him when he needs it and fulfill his needs.
Doing that....tada.....haraam stuff shrinks....masturbation...shrinks....porno even perverted porno goes down the drain. If the man in his inner self knows if he have electronic devices in his home may tempted him to do haraam even if he is carrying his baby on his shoulder it is then his responsibility to make sure no iphone, smartphone, android, computers and any devices where haraam stuff is easily accessed.
Put most of your time at mosques, read Qura'an, do tasbeeh and have friends with other saleeh Muslim families so that your friends are not the avenue for haraam either.
In fact, back then at the time of sahaba the 10 year old boy was so mature that he is fit to be a husband and a father marrying a 20 year old woman...vs a 20 year old man now marrying a 15 year old woman. Why? It s the upbringing and raising of the children by the parent and neglecting boys right. Spoiling them senseless and giving them everything they want and pampering them to me is a form of oppression. You cripple them for life.
Haraam! That is child abuse!
It is time at age five year old you call them father so they feel this inner sense of parenting somehow lingers into their veins, which forces their brain to GROW UP. Why am I rambling? Simple...when the boy reaches age 14...that is the age where his body is flooded with testosterone and desires then immediately this is the time where you should consider marrying him. Regardless of him achieving bachelor or not. By age 14 he should have some kind of job where he can generate income even if it is 800 dollars a month only...and he should get married ASAP and continue his education and improve himself. NOW HE WANTS TO HAVE this sexual release...he do it halaal way...we eliminate masturbation and pornography by an enormous amount! No stupid iphone, ipad and computers for him because he is sooo busy trying to study and work and raise a new family and his wife might get pregnant..so now he have to worry and consider how to raise his children....
his mind now is focused on something else....no more open for shaitaan to lure him to do haraam...he will be so exhausted, tired and busy being a husband and a father that doing porno is his last of concern....
AS LONG AS THE WIFE PROTECT HER HUSBAND'S right and go to bed to him when he needs it. HE SHOULD NOT HAVE TO CLIMB mountains to her by giving her cake, caaaandy, going out to restaurants....HAVE TO READ HER mind...please her...rub her feet...listen to her blaaable and be tested left and right and he have to do this and that...no...no no no...that negates marriage all together and make the very concept marriage redundant. He is horny, he have needs to meet...he calls his wife...she runs faster than light..make herself the most attractive person for him...smile for you...have sweet voice for him...laugh for him when he needs it and fulfill his needs.
Doing that....tada.....haraam stuff shrinks....masturbation...shrinks....porno even perverted porno goes down the drain. If the man in his inner self knows if he have electronic devices in his home may tempted him to do haraam even if he is carrying his baby on his shoulder it is then his responsibility to make sure no iphone, smartphone, android, computers and any devices where haraam stuff is easily accessed.
Put most of your time at mosques, read Qura'an, do tasbeeh and have friends with other saleeh Muslim families so that your friends are not the avenue for haraam either.
There are other dangers too in marrying a guy who's addicted to porn (it's likely to be an addiction, otherwise a practicing Muslim wouldn't watch it)
Rather than you change him, he could end up changing you for the worse.
A sister once complained about how her practicing husband wants her to indulge in this filth along with him, he even used to force her to watch it by slapping her until she does.
People who watch porn have very perverted desires and want to put them to practice and that's why they would rather their partner watches too so she/he can develop the same perversions..... I think you get the picture, so I wouldn't be surprised if he tries to tempt you into watching..... So your faith could be at risk too as porn really corrupts the heart badly as its full of extremely vile satanic shameless stuff.
Also he himself might not be a fully practicing Muslim... I doubt that a person who fills his heart with this wicked vileness at night, would have enough taqwa and motivation to get up for fajr in the morning, or that he'll be mindful to do his five daily salaahs. Such people usually get trapped in a cycle where they do 1 or 2 salaahs a day just to humanise up a bit from the wretched state porn watching puts them in and they miss the rest of salaahs.... Not saying the your fiance is like this but it could be a possibility
Porn is so wicked and vile Sister that any Allah fearing Muslim just would not watch it so really the bottom line is, your fiance is a hypocryt (not the kaafir type, but a believer hypocryt) and you should not marry him for that reason alone
Rather than you change him, he could end up changing you for the worse.
A sister once complained about how her practicing husband wants her to indulge in this filth along with him, he even used to force her to watch it by slapping her until she does.
People who watch porn have very perverted desires and want to put them to practice and that's why they would rather their partner watches too so she/he can develop the same perversions..... I think you get the picture, so I wouldn't be surprised if he tries to tempt you into watching..... So your faith could be at risk too as porn really corrupts the heart badly as its full of extremely vile satanic shameless stuff.
Also he himself might not be a fully practicing Muslim... I doubt that a person who fills his heart with this wicked vileness at night, would have enough taqwa and motivation to get up for fajr in the morning, or that he'll be mindful to do his five daily salaahs. Such people usually get trapped in a cycle where they do 1 or 2 salaahs a day just to humanise up a bit from the wretched state porn watching puts them in and they miss the rest of salaahs.... Not saying the your fiance is like this but it could be a possibility
Porn is so wicked and vile Sister that any Allah fearing Muslim just would not watch it so really the bottom line is, your fiance is a hypocryt (not the kaafir type, but a believer hypocryt) and you should not marry him for that reason alone
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Thank God that Allah will be the Judge on the day of Judgement. If it is upto the humans then they would not forgive their own parents and kids.
Why we need to be so extreme? We should hate the sin and not the person. If someone needs help to be cured spiritually or physically and if it is possible for us to help, then we should help them.
From what I understand, the guy is remorseful and sincere. He could have kept this a secret and there is nothing which OP could do about that. We should appreciate his sincerity. It appears that the guy is now praying regularly. I dont know how sincerely he is practicing Islam but I would give him benefit of doubt.
Sister who originally posted this question knows her situation better and knows how sincere this guy is and we should leave it up to her to decide.
Why we need to be so extreme? We should hate the sin and not the person. If someone needs help to be cured spiritually or physically and if it is possible for us to help, then we should help them.
What would you do if the guy we are discussing is your real brother? Would you stop talking to him and socially boycott him because according to your description he is hypocrite and one should stay away from evil people. Would you not look to help him? What would you do if your own son has this disease? Would you never search to marry him with someone?
Is it possible that he is doing this because he never had halal means to fulfil his sexual desires? This is one of the major reason. We are so much focused inbuilding our careers that it has become a norm to get married in late 30's. Even when a guy wants to get married, his parents will say no, you need build your career first.
Is it possible that once he has halal means he can be cured? Yes, more than 80% are able to get rid of this habit after getting married. Marriage is a new start of life for many and most people seriously starting following Islam after getting married. That is why marriage is said to be half the faith.
What could happen if sister says no after he trusted her? His parents and may be the friends would also find out that why he was rejected and this could be a final straw for him. He could be humiliated to a point that he would prefer to find the company of people who will not make fun of him and would say what he is doing is normal. Those friends could be non Muslims and could take him away from Islam. Anyways this is how we turn people away from Islam. People make mistakes and when they repent, we should try to provide them the good company they need. If our good can't change a bad person then we also have a problem.
Is it possible that he is doing this because he never had halal means to fulfil his sexual desires? This is one of the major reason. We are so much focused inbuilding our careers that it has become a norm to get married in late 30's. Even when a guy wants to get married, his parents will say no, you need build your career first.
Is it possible that once he has halal means he can be cured? Yes, more than 80% are able to get rid of this habit after getting married. Marriage is a new start of life for many and most people seriously starting following Islam after getting married. That is why marriage is said to be half the faith.
What could happen if sister says no after he trusted her? His parents and may be the friends would also find out that why he was rejected and this could be a final straw for him. He could be humiliated to a point that he would prefer to find the company of people who will not make fun of him and would say what he is doing is normal. Those friends could be non Muslims and could take him away from Islam. Anyways this is how we turn people away from Islam. People make mistakes and when they repent, we should try to provide them the good company they need. If our good can't change a bad person then we also have a problem.
From what I understand, the guy is remorseful and sincere. He could have kept this a secret and there is nothing which OP could do about that. We should appreciate his sincerity. It appears that the guy is now praying regularly. I dont know how sincerely he is practicing Islam but I would give him benefit of doubt.
Sister who originally posted this question knows her situation better and knows how sincere this guy is and we should leave it up to her to decide.
Salam everyone, thank you for taking time to provide some insight. From what i know of him is he is an incredibly honest person (exhibit why he told me) any time he makes a mistake no matter how big or small he has always taken ownership of it - something that everyone who knows him says too). I am hurt by his confession but he has swore that he will stop, has cut out all his avenues and is ready to do anything to gain my trust in this matter. I rest my case with Allah for now, and will continue to perform istikhara. Please make dua for me that whatever decision i come too with the aid of Allah is not one that i ever regret. Ameen.
I think pretty much has been said already on this.
I would like to just point out one part of your message. (You wrote about the same in your original message)
Will stop? Future? Not has stopped? I think this should tell you a lot about his true character.
I would like to just point out one part of your message. (You wrote about the same in your original message)
Will stop? Future? Not has stopped? I think this should tell you a lot about his true character.
W/Salam Sister,
May Allah help you to make the right decision. I just want to share something about istikhara.
It is not necessary that you get a dream or even a feeling when you do istikhara. Rather, the istikhara is a prayer that Allah guide you towards which is best for you. If you do the prayer of guidance (istikhara) with the proper manners, the most important of which is to truly consign the matter to Allah and suspend your own inclinations, then Allah will make events unfold in the direction that is the best for your worldly and next-worldly affairs. If marrying this guy is good for you then Allah will make it happen even when it looks impossible. And if marrying this person is not good for you then Allah will create circumstances which will result is canceling this marriage. I have given a link below on Istikhara and hope you find this helpful.
https://youtu.be/iBZUCFd3GOk
Also remember that you have to do your part. You and your family need to make sure to check with as many people as possible about the guy and his character. Check what type of friends he has, how he spends his time after work, which mosque he goes to and what people generally say about him. Do your homework and keep asking Allah for guidance through Istikhara. Inshallah everything will work out fine.
May Allah put His blessings in everything you do and help you find the right partner in your life! Ameen!
May Allah help you to make the right decision. I just want to share something about istikhara.
You may already know this but I thought it will be better to share anyways.
It is not necessary that you get a dream or even a feeling when you do istikhara. Rather, the istikhara is a prayer that Allah guide you towards which is best for you. If you do the prayer of guidance (istikhara) with the proper manners, the most important of which is to truly consign the matter to Allah and suspend your own inclinations, then Allah will make events unfold in the direction that is the best for your worldly and next-worldly affairs. If marrying this guy is good for you then Allah will make it happen even when it looks impossible. And if marrying this person is not good for you then Allah will create circumstances which will result is canceling this marriage. I have given a link below on Istikhara and hope you find this helpful.
https://youtu.be/iBZUCFd3GOk
Also remember that you have to do your part. You and your family need to make sure to check with as many people as possible about the guy and his character. Check what type of friends he has, how he spends his time after work, which mosque he goes to and what people generally say about him. Do your homework and keep asking Allah for guidance through Istikhara. Inshallah everything will work out fine.
May Allah put His blessings in everything you do and help you find the right partner in your life! Ameen!
He will say anything now to secure the marraige and as only Allah knows ones heart, there's no way you can know whether he's being truthfull when he says he's given it up for last month
Also bear in mind, no matter how determined he is to give this sickness up, there is a big risk he won't be able to due to its addictive nature....
Also bear in mind, no matter how determined he is to give this sickness up, there is a big risk he won't be able to due to its addictive nature....
Istikhara is done when a person is in the dark about whether to go ahead with something or not but when a person has information... Then it's best to judge on the information
Anyway, whatever you decide, I pray it is the best decision
Anyway, whatever you decide, I pray it is the best decision
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xboxisdead
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OP you have to understand if he did stop this evil act and he wants to do good and you marry him then you must understand that now you have to be very careful and not deny his rights now more over than a person who never fulfilled this evil deed to start with. Because now he needs the fix, even though he stopped it...his craving for sexual release is much stronger and his addiction for the morphine that comes out of sex orgasm still lingering in his blood. YOU HAVE ZERO opportunity to deny him sex when he calls you, you have zero opportunity to use sex as a weapon against him, you have zero opportunity to look bad for him, you have zero opportunity to gain weight, you have zero opportunity to cut your hair short, you have zero opportunity to stop being feminine, because if you give him any inclination of hard time he will fall back to the evil action and that means YOU get TO SHARE HIS PUNISHMENT and no longer he is to be blamed...YOU TAKE THE BLAME too.
THIS IS AN ENORMOUS responsibility on your shoulders. It is no longer about gender war or men issue or women issue or men vs women or whatever crap society is bringing on the table....you have agreed in such a contract that if he ever returns back to that evil and you somehow failed in giving him his rights because of power struggle or manipulation or being bored or being tired or whatever reasons comes in your mind.....we look at you first before looking at him. First question the society will ask, "What did his wife do that pushed her husband to do bad?"
Do you want to go that route? Ask yourself if you are strong enough to handle such responsibility! If not...then you still have a chance to say no.
THIS IS AN ENORMOUS responsibility on your shoulders. It is no longer about gender war or men issue or women issue or men vs women or whatever crap society is bringing on the table....you have agreed in such a contract that if he ever returns back to that evil and you somehow failed in giving him his rights because of power struggle or manipulation or being bored or being tired or whatever reasons comes in your mind.....we look at you first before looking at him. First question the society will ask, "What did his wife do that pushed her husband to do bad?"
Do you want to go that route? Ask yourself if you are strong enough to handle such responsibility! If not...then you still have a chance to say no.
Sister there's good clean sincere practicing guys out there, why do you want to marry this guy who's been a hyoocryt indulging in evil filth? And especially when there is a great risk he won't be able to give it up....
There is still time to rethink this. I only want the best for a clean sister like you!
There is still time to rethink this. I only want the best for a clean sister like you!