He offered to help me, should I tell.....?

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Danah

Danah

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I am a graduate student, so today me and my friend went to University to take some important papers in order to be able to apply for a job. While we are there we thought of passing by some of our professors offices to greet them "some of them were very helpful to us, that's why we wanted to say salam to them as a kind of appreciation"
Anyways, we tried to visit our best professor who helped us a lot during our Senior project but unfortunately he was not in his office, so my friend asked me to call his mobile since I have his number from the previous semester. I did, but he didn't answer "seemed that he was in his class or something" so we just returned back to our homes. After few hours while I was in home he called me apologizing that he was not there and when he knew that we were there he apologized that he missed a chance to meet his graduate students. So, he started asking me what I am planning to do now after graduation. I told him my plans, and he offered me a help that he know some people in the destinations I want to apply on and that he wanted to be the one who send my CV to them "since I am one of his A's students" and he always showed so much respect to me and always offered me good advices. Its his style to encourage A's students to work, help them to choose good places and even keep in touch with them after graduation.

Now coming to the problem. I feel that I have to tell my friend about that, we always share our plans, it will be a pure selfishness if I didn't tell her. At the same time, I don't wanna cause any troubles for my Professor, he will says that I bring my friends so he is supposed to help them as well!! I don't want my friend to think that I am planning for something behind her back. She will think that I don't want knair for her or something like that.

Even though, he said that he cant promise anything, but still his intention to help is very appreciated even if my application form will be rejected, but I was thinking of this: If just in case I got a job through his connection "after Allah's well" what I will say to my friend if I didn't tell her at the first place? :hmm:

plz plz advice me, I was thinking of posting anonymously but thought that there is no need since all members here are like a family...plzzz any advice will be appreciated. He is waiting my to send my CV in the coming few days!!

Keep me and my friend in your duaa to find a good job.
 
One more thing, if I will tell her, how I can say it in away that will not put my professor in an embarressed situation since he was the one who supervised me and her at the same senior group last semester?
 
:wa:

Danah said:
:sl:

... what I will say to my friend if I didn't tell her at the first place? :hmm:

.
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tell her to pray for your new job and tell her that if it becomes a success , then u will celebrate it with her . Till then , no more details :statisfie

Also assure her that if it's possible , u will try to help her now and in future. InshaAllah she will understand :)
 
There is no need for you to tell her. He offered to help you himself and if he wants he can tell her directly. You also don't need to tell her afterwards that he helped you. Afterall, you both are trying to get work and will be applying in many places so it won't be strange if you got work. If you like, you can tell her to drop by his office to thank him and he might offer to take her cv as well. If you get a job through your professor and you learn of any vacancies in your workplace you can always ask her to submit her cv.

If, on the other hand, you do want to tell her, then you can just call her and tell her like you would share any great news "wow he offered to send my cv to some ppl! i can't believe it!" I don't see why you can't do that cuz he didn't say it was a big secret or for you not to tell anyone else. If she wants, she can take his number and call him & just say, I stopped by you office but you weren't there, etc or she can just go to his office to thank him and he might offer to send her cv as well.
 
^ Agree. Tell her he called you back and was nice, and advise her to give him a call or drop by his office without mentioning anything about what he offered you. If she does and he helps her, fine. If she does and he doesn't offer her, then again it's fine and it wasn't meant for her. If she doesn't then her fate lies elsewhere and you did what you were supposed to.
 
Muslim Woman said:
:wa:



tell her to pray for your new job and tell her that if it becomes a success , then u will celebrate it with her . Till then , no more details :statisfie

Also assure her that if it's possible , u will try to help her now and in future. InshaAllah she will understand :)
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muhaba said:
There is no need for you to tell her. He offered to help you himself and if he wants he can tell her directly. You also don't need to tell her afterwards that he helped you. Afterall, you both are trying to get work and will be applying in many places so it won't be strange if you got work. If you like, you can tell her to drop by his office to thank him and he might offer to take her cv as well. If you get a job through your professor and you learn of any vacancies in your workplace you can always ask her to submit her cv.

If, on the other hand, you do want to tell her, then you can just call her and tell her like you would share any great news "wow he offered to send my cv to some ppl! i can't believe it!" I don't see why you can't do that cuz he didn't say it was a big secret or for you not to tell anyone else. If she wants, she can take his number and call him & just say, I stopped by you office but you weren't there, etc or she can just go to his office to thank him and he might offer to send her cv as well.
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^ both of u sisters are right, and I agree with both of you

Well, I already told him that both of us stopped by his office, he know her very well...we worked for a long time with him together.

This friend is one of my closest friends I have ever!
 
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Sampharo said:
^ Agree. Tell her he called you back and was nice, and advise her to give him a call or drop by his office without mentioning anything about what he offered you. If she does and he helps her, fine. If she does and he doesn't offer her, then again it's fine and it wasn't meant for her. If she doesn't then her fate lies elsewhere and you did what you were supposed to.
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well, this seemed to be more natural to tell her what happen from the beginning. But should I rly not mention anything about what he did to her. I know my friend will get upset if she know later but she wont say a word because this is her, she will hide it I am sure.
 
I couldn't read all that Danah, you wrote too much, but you;re soooooo cute, any friend should be grateful to have a thoughtful friend like you,

It shouldn't be extra work for the teacher since he's teaching you the same thing and not even teaching separately,

Also if you want you can do the notes for her and let her copy them and study off your notes,

While I was ill all my mates gave me their notes and I had to do the exam off their notes and books and I ended up getting better grades than them =| so you will still be helping her =D

All the best,

x poKezz x
 
Pk_#2 said:
I couldn't read all that Danah, you wrote too much, but you;re soooooo cute, any friend should be grateful to have a thoughtful friend like you,

It shouldn't be extra work for the teacher since he's teaching you the same thing and not even teaching separately,

Also if you want you can do the notes for her and let her copy them and study off your notes,

While I was ill all my mates gave me their notes and I had to do the exam off their notes and books and I ended up getting better grades than them =| so you will still be helping her =D

All the best,

x poKezz x
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lol bless u dear,

Its about offering a job not copying notes, I am already a graduate now :) *couldn't rep u*


Fighting4Iman said:
why dont you ask your prof if you can tell your friend? :)
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No, that will be very embarrassing to do, its gonna be very hard

I will pray Istikhara first inshaAllah then decide how things will be done
 
None of you will truly believe until you love for your brother what you love for yourself".
(narrated by Bukhari)

Ask professor for recommendation letters for both and both apply... perhaps both of you will get the job... or 1 or none... doesn't matter...

Allah is the sustainer... trust in Him.
 
:sl:

DigitalStorm82 said:
....Ask professor for recommendation letters for both .
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But we can't force anyone to give recommendation letter . If he does not consider the other one as qualified enough , why should he do it ? Also , her friend can directly contact with the Professor.
 

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