How to overcome Porn & Masturbation

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Re: How to overcome Masturbation

Thanks a lot all of you. Your guidance would be of great help to me, though what you have all advised is very difficult to practice, but I'll try my best to follow these.

Regards
 
Re: How to overcome Masturbation

How to overcome?

Wait like a week before doing it.
 
Re: How to overcome Masturbation

humanbeing93 said:
Thanks a lot all of you. Your guidance would be of great help to me, though what you have all advised is very difficult to practice, but I'll try my best to follow these.

Regards
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Salam u Aleykum akhi

I have some advices for you In'schaa'allah .

1. Set a reminder as your background,maybe "Allah is watching you"

2. Change your habits ,go to sleep earlier, because at night is the time when you get emotional

3. Lower your gaze
 
Re: How to overcome Masturbation

Try to control or at least delay it and lessen the frequency
 
Re: How to overcome Masturbation

HOW TO STOP MASTURBATION?

 
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Re: How to overcome Masturbation

Two Amazing reminders to resist our carnal desires and bad habits:


Are You Interested In Her? This Is Her Price



What Have You Sacrificed ᴴᴰ - Emotional Eye Opener

 
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Re: How to overcome Masturbation

I Have Really Bad Habit of Pornography and Masturbation

 
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Re: How to overcome Masturbation

THE CURE for Porn Addiction - Feed the right Wolf

 
Re: How to overcome Masturbation

Hamza Asadullah said:
How to overcome Masturbation

This thread is devoted to finding ways of overcoming the vile sin of masturbation. I hope Insha'Allah you find it most beneficial.



12 Tips to Help Control the Evil Habit of Masterbation


1. Never touch the intimate parts of your body except during normal toilet processes. Even if you get tempted, just think of Allah and the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) and that Allah is watching you at all times and this urge will go away.

2. Avoid being alone as much as possible. Shaythan plays with the minds of those who sit around idle and not doing anything. Find good company and stay in this good company. Spend time with your family and close ones (Not Non mahrams). Find good company and stay in this good company. The best company are those who lead you towards good and not those who lead you in the wrong direction. Don't hang around with those girls who talk about sexual things and boys etc.

3. If you are associated with other persons having this same problem, you must break off their friendship. Never associate with other people having the same weakness. Don't suppose that two of you will quit together, you never will. You must get away from people of that kind. Just to be in their presence will keep your problem foremost in your mind. The problem must be taken out of your mind for that is where it really exists. Your mind must be on other and more wholesome things.

4. When you bathe, do not admire yourself in a mirror. Never stay in the bath more than five or six minutes -- just long enough to bathe and dry and dress and then get out of the bathroom as soon as possible because we are advised in the sunnah not to delay getting changed after a bath. We should dry ourselves and get into doing an act of worship.

5. When in bed, if that is where you have your problem for the most part, dress yourself for the night so securely that you cannot easily touch your vital parts, and so that it would be difficult and time consuming for you to remove those clothes. By the time you started to remove protective clothing you would have sufficiently controlled your thinking that the temptation would leave you. Sleep on your sides and NOT on your front or back. It is forbidden to sleep on your stomach and it is sunnah to sleep on your right side. Do dua's and Zikr until you fall asleep.

6. If the temptation seems overpowering while you are in bed, get out of bed and go into the kitchen and fix yourself a snack, even if it is in the middle of the night, and even if you are not hungry, and despite your fears of gaining weight. The purpose behind this suggestion is that you get your mind on something else. You are the subject of your thoughts, so to speak. If these thoughts come to you in the middle of the night then go and do wudu and pray Tahajjud and make much dua and cry in your dua's of Allah to increase you in imaan (Faith) and to help you resist your desires and to help you get married ASAP.

7. Find out when are your weakest times when your most likely to masterbate or touch yourself. When you have established on what times and occassions this occurs then you can plan what to do to avoid feeling temptations on thos particular occassions.

8. Never read pornographic material especially on the internet as these images will be stored in your head and it will make your problem worse. Try to keep your gaze low at all times. Never read about your problem. Keep it out of mind. Remember -- "First a thought, then an act." The thought pattern must be changed. You must not allow this problem to remain in your mind. When you accomplish that, you soon will be free of the act inshallah.

9. Put wholesome thoughts into your mind at all times. Read good Islamic books, the life of the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) and his seerah, the life after death. There SO many interesting topics to read and learn about. Make a daily habit of reading at least one juz(Chapter) of Qur'an with its meanings.

Reading the Qur'an everyday with its meanings will bring countless blessings and rewards and bring you closer to Allah as well as keep you busy and occupied therefore keeping your mind off this problem.

10. Make much dua. But when you make dua don't just make dua about this problem, for that will tend to keep it in your mind more than ever. Make dua for increase of your iman(faith), Make dua for understanding of the Islam and the Qur'an, Make dua for your family and ALL Muslims especially the ones that are being oprressed, Pray for the sick and that we all unite as one. keep the problem out of your mind by not mentioning it ever --not in conversation with others, not inso much in your dua's. keep it out of your mind because if you keep mentioning it then it will stay in your mind!

11. Fast. You may have tried it before and it did'nt work but how can it work if we don't change our eating habits? If we eat little just to satisfy our stomachs then our fasting will be effective and restrict our sexual urges and capability's. But if we carry on over eating after our fasts then that food will impact on the stomach which will impact on our desires. So restrict the amount you eat before and after fasting and you will feel the benefits of fasting to stop your urges.

12. Finally the best solution of all- GET MARRIED. Give some urgency to your family about the need for you to get married sooner rather than later. Tell them of the benefits of getting married early and that it is a sunnah as the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) recommended it as it will help avoid haraam(Forbidden) relations with non mahrams and getting married early will help eradicate this problem and mean that one can indulge in their sexual urges and desires legitamatley as well as recieve reward for it. The main reason why there is so many haraam relations out there is for the fact that our families are not getting their children married early enough as the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) advised.


May Allah keep us away form anything that angers and displeases him. Ameen
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Also, you can use this wazifa to stop having bad habits:

to eliminate bad habits. recite ya khabiru (the aware) several times, daily this will help get rid of your bad habits.
 
Re: How to overcome Masturbation

very good brother,you have been continuing this thread for almost 5 years,really helpful,i agree to them all....but i wanted to add that i dont think getting married is best solution to stopping masturbation....yes,it sounds crazy but it is not....the majority of those who masturbate watch porn too or at least dont watch porn but have done it for a long time....now this is like a drug,its stuck in their mind as a source of dopamine and they go back to it,they keep thinking of it even if they dont feel desires,just looking or thinking of a half naked woman will trigger it,and they dont have much self control over this,if they did they would have stopped....what i mean is,someone who is addicted to masturbation/porn after getting married may stop for some time,but then will get ''bored'' with his wife and will slowly start getting back to masturbating or watching porn....it is very easy for their brain to get bored with one woman because they have been used to go video to video,always looking for ''better''......and in islam we dont even watch her without hijab before getting married so imagine a porn addict who keeps looking at these ''perfect'' girls everyday,and what he sees isnt like in porn,he would eventually go back to porn.......i hope i am wrong but i think its better to develop some self control first,a new outlook on life,and get married when masturbation happens veryyy rarely
 
Re: How to overcome Masturbation

RisingLight said:
very good brother,you have been continuing this thread for almost 5 years,really helpful,i agree to them all....but i wanted to add that i dont think getting married is best solution to stopping masturbation....yes,it sounds crazy but it is not....the majority of those who masturbate watch porn too or at least dont watch porn but have done it for a long time....now this is like a drug,its stuck in their mind as a source of dopamine and they go back to it,they keep thinking of it even if they dont feel desires,just looking or thinking of a half naked woman will trigger it,and they dont have much self control over this,if they did they would have stopped....what i mean is,someone who is addicted to masturbation/porn after getting married may stop for some time,but then will get ''bored'' with his wife and will slowly start getting back to masturbating or watching porn....it is very easy for their brain to get bored with one woman because they have been used to go video to video,always looking for ''better''......and in islam we dont even watch her without hijab before getting married so imagine a porn addict who keeps looking at these ''perfect'' girls everyday,and what he sees isnt like in porn,he would eventually go back to porn.......i hope i am wrong but i think its better to develop some self control first,a new outlook on life,and get married when masturbation happens veryyy rarely
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That's basically what I've been saying all along. Simply saying "get married" is setting that person up for a disastrous marriage. Not only that, but if you're only intention to get married is for the sake of fulfilling your desires, not only will it fail, but you're also ruining the other persons life by forcing your problems on them. The purpose of marriage in Islam has more meaning than that as well. There are many threads on this forum where the poster is asking for advice regarding their spouse's porn addiction. Not just on here, but people in general. Here in the US, married people openly talk about looking at porn as if it's something to be proud about, sometimes they even talk about looking at it with their spouses.

If someone is suffering from an addiction to porn, they need to fix their problems first and foremost before ever thinking about marriage. It isn't a matter of taking periodic breaks from it but rather to permanently stop the act all together. The images or videos one looks at won't easily be forgotten, if at all, and if that person spent years or even decades of their lives looking at that stuff, it'll most likely be burnt into their memories forever. This is both a test and a punishment for that person because if they are genuine in wanting to change, then they will have to show it by acting against their urges. That and, depending on their environment, they could be surrounded by people who dress immodestly thus making the urges even worse. It truly is a test of patience that is very rewarding for the person who passes it, both in this life and the next.

Having said that, the only advice I can give to people with these types of problems is to focus on the akhira and be patient. Time spent in the dunya is insignificant relative to our permanent homes in the hereafter. Wasting hours of your life on a daily basis looking at a stranger on your computer for temporary pleasure is not worth it..
 
Re: How to overcome Masturbation

keiv said:
That's basically what I've been saying all along. Simply saying "get married" is setting that person up for a disastrous marriage. Not only that, but if you're only intention to get married is for the sake of fulfilling your desires, not only will it fail, but you're also ruining the other persons life by forcing your problems on them. The purpose of marriage in Islam has more meaning than that as well. There are many threads on this forum where the poster is asking for advice regarding their spouse's porn addiction. Not just on here, but people in general. Here in the US, married people openly talk about looking at porn as if it's something to be proud about, sometimes they even talk about looking at it with their spouses.

If someone is suffering from an addiction to porn, they need to fix their problems first and foremost before ever thinking about marriage. It isn't a matter of taking periodic breaks from it but rather to permanently stop the act all together. The images or videos one looks at won't easily be forgotten, if at all, and if that person spent years or even decades of their lives looking at that stuff, it'll most likely be burnt into their memories forever. This is both a test and a punishment for that person because if they are genuine in wanting to change, then they will have to show it by acting against their urges. That and, depending on their environment, they could be surrounded by people who dress immodestly thus making the urges even worse. It truly is a test of patience that is very rewarding for the person who passes it, both in this life and the next.

Having said that, the only advice I can give to people with these types of problems is to focus on the akhira and be patient. Time spent in the dunya is insignificant relative to our permanent homes in the hereafter. Wasting hours of your life on a daily basis looking at a stranger on your computer for temporary pleasure is not worth it..
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exactly,thats what i said in another post too..getting married for the sake of fulfilling your desires is not a good thing at all...those desires are satisfied in the first night and then in then in the morning what are you left with? a huge responsibility that you arent even capable of holding

i think its extremely hard to stop the act permanently alone,and there is no assurance if you will go back or not...i remember a guy once who was desperate because he did it again once after 530 days....sometimes the urges are so big that is extremely hard to stop...it is really a challenge

may Allah help every one who wants to be saved from doing this act and make porn disgusting for them
 
Re: How to overcome Masturbation

I do agree that marriage does not necessarily "cure" the problem with being addicted to masterbation and porn because as you have correctly stated one may continue to get ones dopamine fix from watching porn and masterbating even whilst married which can negatively impact upon ones sex life during marriage.

However being married can certainly help one to cure this problem far better than someone who is not married because whilst being married it is far easier to be "fap free" and not turn to porn than if one was not married as being married gives one a permissible means or an "outlet" to be able to fulfill ones desires and therefore far easier to help one to be able stop these haraam addictions. But I think it is important to internalise before hand that one will not turn to these haraam means again and to make the necessary effort and be consistent in refraining from turning to these haraam means of fulfilling ones desires.

After a period of time of refraining from these haraam addictions and getting used to fulfilling ones desires in the permissable way ones brain will eventually "rewire" itself again and then one will only be able to enjoy ones desires in the natural and permissable ways.

Of course as with any addiction there is always a danger of "relapse" and so therefore as it is stated throughout this thread, one must always be aware of the "triggers" that may cause a relapse and do ones best to ensure that one does not get triggered and to keep ones imaan topped up as much as possible so as to help ensure one does not go back to these haraam means. Even if one trips or falls then one must get back up and ensure that they do not allow these addictions to once again "rewire" the brain back to being used to fulfilling ones desires in the impermissible unnatural way.

I think everyone has certain triggers that are unique to oneself but of course there are triggers that are consistent in most people which have been stipulated in the articles in this thread such as lowering gaze at all times whether out and about and online and Television. As well as avoiding being alone and keeping oneself busy etc.

Of course it goes without saying that we must always do our best to ensure we have Taqwa at all times not only to prevent these addictions but to prevent all public and private sins.

May Allah enable us to avoid doing anything that may harm ourselves and our imaan. Ameen
 
Re: How to overcome Masturbation

The following are just a few general ways we can help ourselves to change a bad habit:

1. Quit caffeine. This maybe surprising for many but caffeine is a highly addictive substance. You only need one cup a day to be addicted. If you don't think you are then go without it for 3 days and you will realise. Caffeine causes one to become weaker to other addictions as it plays with the bodies hormonal and adrenal system. Some are more sensitive to it than others but you will certainly find that quitting caffeine will help you to quit other addictions and increase you in will power as well as clearing one's mind as consistent caffeine use can cause brain fog and loss of focus. Quitting helps one to become more stable minded and calmer and less agitated, fatigued and short tempered. Most importantly It allows one to have a much better and deeper sleep as caffeine affects sleep, even if you've only had one in the morning. Caffeine does not increase focus and productivity in the long term. It hampers it. Allah created us perfectly without the need of external substances to help us operate optimumly on a daily basis. So try quitting for 30 days and you will see the benefits in every aspect of your life. This also includes other addictive drugs such as nicotine and even prescribed drugs such as opioids.

2. Correct sleep pattern. It goes without saying that the most important thing we can do for our health is to correct our sleep pattern. This effects every aspect of our mind, body and soul. If our sleep pattern is not consistent then it will have a detrimental affect in every aspect of our lives including our Deen. We can never be the best versions of ourselves if we do not correct our sleep patterns. Therefore we must sleep early and awaken early. The earlier we sleep the less time we will have in the evenings for our desires to become ignited.

3. Eat smaller portions of food, reduce red meat and Fast. Eating large portions of food has a hugely detrimental effect on our health as well as our desires. Reduce food portion sizes, reduce red meat to once a fortnight and fast the Sunnah days twice a week on Monday and Thursdays as well as the 3 white days (13th, 14th and 15th of each Islamic month) and you will reap the rewards and benefits to your health in terms of mental, physical and spiritual well-being. It will also help significantly to control one's desires and increase in will power.

4. Quit TV, movies/Dramas, control internet usage. It goes without saying that Television, movies, dramas etc are significantly detrimental to our conscious and subconscious minds. This is because most of what is showed is opposite to what our Deen conveys and propagates. It is full of propaganda and indoctrination both directly and subconsciously. If we cannot totally quit then at least be very selective in terms of what we feed our minds and always appoint specific times that we will watch certain programmes and be on the internet. Try to avoid totally from 8pm onwards as the desires weaken as the evening sets in. If we don't schedule our time then we will just browse and watch without measure and that is what is likely to ignite passions and desires. Put a internet block on adult websites and hide password somewhere so it is an effort to find it.

5. Occupy yourself with good things in the evenings. Feed your mind Islamic knowledge and schedule remembrance of Allah and pondering over Allah from 8 pm onwards so you spend the evening occupied with good so that evil and desires cannot set in. Read, read and read. Reading has declined significantly in our times only to our detriment. Schedule in to read a minimum of one page of a good Islamic book and one page of the Qur'an with it's meanings. Start off small and gradually increase.

6. Organise and schedule your time. This is very important in order to be more selective about how we spend our time. If we don't schedule and organise our precious time then shaythan and our Nafs certainly will. You can use many tools nowadays to schedule time whether on outlook, phone apps or on paper. Whatever works best for you.

7. Pray Tahajjud. This has a profound effect on one's overall level of Imaan. Awaken even 15-20 minutes before Fajr begins and Pray 2 - 8 Rakah whatever you can manage. Afterwards connect with Allah through Dua. Ask of him and beg of him to help you in every aspect of your life especially when it comes to overcoming detrimental addictions. The amazing thing about Tahajjud is that you will continue to feel that special feeling throughout the day and you will feel your imaan on a high. You will be more inclined to do good deeds and less inclined towards sin. Try it and you will see! However to enhance this special feeling ensure that men in particular try and pray Fajr with congregation. Connecting to the Masjid is essentially connecting with Allah and has a hugely positive effect on helping keep us at bay with our desires and also connect with other Muslims.

I hope the above tips help. May Allah enable us to overcome all habits and addictions that are holding us back from getting closer to him and being the best versions of ourselves. Ameen
 
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