SALAAM
I am becoming a slave to my desires, im slipping so fast, all this influence that im living in is seducing me to sin. Im so weak and i dont want to be. Everytime i pick my self up, one little trigger and im back on the ground. My self control is gone and im once again thirsty for sin. I need help...
First of all, let us all remind ourselves that we are but humans, and sinning is inevitable. My Uncle once told me of a Sheikh that once said that if sins had an odour, he would stink. So no matter how much wisdom one has about Islam, and no matter how practicing they are, they're bound to sin. And Allah Knows Best. Only our beloved Prophet, Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him, is free of sin.
Do not be hard on yourself, but always try your best to stand back up again and fight. We are all bound to slip at times, but it's what happens next that really counts. Do we lay there in self-pity and do nothing about our situation? Or do we remind ourselves of our duty to Allah (SWT) and stand back up again in repentance and fear of The All-Mighty? Allah (SWT) is Oft-Forgiving, Most-Merciful. So do not despair.
Here are some tips which may help you (and they are tips I'm trying to follow myself):
- Make your absolute best effort to pray all your prayers. Do your best to pray on time and always repent to Allah (SWT).
- Be careful who you associate yourself with (i.e. the friends you take), because friends are an incredible source of influence. I truly believe that a real friend, someone worthy of our time, is one who cares for our Akhirah. This is so incredibly important.
- Try to cut down on watching TV and listening to music that excites you. I'm not saying quit cold-turkey, just do not let yourself get sucked into the dream world of TV, movies and music. These three are also very dangerous because they stimulate your innermost desires. So be careful, and try occupying as much time as possible with other activities (i.e. learning more about Islam, studying, reading, sports, hanging out with good friends, spending time with family, etc.).
- No matter what, never stay down. If you fall back into weakness and temptation, pick yourself back up ASAP! This is why having good friends is so important. Because those times you do get weak, they will InshAllah encourage you and serve as a reminder to you.
We are all struggling with our Deen, Friend. It's not easy. It is a war - a war against the shaytan and our nefs (whims, desires, etc.). Do not think that if you go back into your old ways again you cannot turn back to Allah (SWT). If anything, Allah (SWT) LOVES those who turn to Him in sincere repentance and seek refuge in Him.
May Allah (SWT) guide us all. InshAllah my words and advise are correct and if I have made any mistakes, may Allah (SWT) forgive me. My mistakes are mine alone. And Allah Knows Best.
