I can't stop my tears and hurt

[noorseeker]

For the past year or so ive been really down, every few days i am in tears because i feel so lonely and sad , im 25 and not married , i wish i had some one i could come home to, so i can share things with. I see married people every where and feel a bit of envy , im not attractive and dont think i will ever get a wife,i feel like im a loser. I am practising and do pray but i feel like i havent got the connection with Allah swt when i pray, ever since i started to pray i feel like ive become more depressed instead of feeling the sweetness of imaan, i dont know what to do any more , i wish i could scream out or wish i could tell my mum

 

[Abdul Fattah]

Selam aleykum
May Allah subhana wa ta'ala grant you a pious and loving wife.
And brother, you are not a loser. You told us that you are practicing and praying and seeking the sweetness of religion, so inshaAllah you will not be among the losers on the day of judgment.

Be patient with the trials that Allah subhana wa ta'ala set for you. Oh, and about practicing making you more depressed, that's perfectly normal, we all go trough that every time we start practicing more then before. See when a person suddenly decides to follow his religion closer, the shaytans attack him even more, hoping that this person will think that the depression is associated with the practicing and that hence the person will stop. The best way to counter this is to be steadfast, and if possible even do more worship whenever you feel these feelings emerge, that way the shaytans will see that instead of leading you astray, they are only encouraging you to gain more reward by their actions and then they will inshaAllah seize those specific tactics.

May Allah subhana wa ta'ala guide you and may he make things easier for you

 

[noorseeker]

Jazakallah bro Abdul fattah, i will pray for your happiness,

 

[AnonymousPoster]

Bro thats th shaytan he's evil whispers. When u not praying u notice that u get no whispers, but when u praying all the whispers come all of a sudden. Keep praying, dont lose that connection with allah s.w.t.

Bro have sabr inshallah there is someone out their for you. Sabr.

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah

bro there was a sahabi who had the same problem lol... i forgot the name but the prophet sallallahi alaihi wasallaam approached him and asked him if his married and the sahabi said that he has been asking around but he keeps getting rejected because of his shortness and dark skin so the prophet sallallahi alaihi wasallaam set him up with a beautiful intelligent pious girl. You see bro this sahabi was patient, he didnt even complain once, infact the prophet went up to him . mashaAllah truelly the best of generation.

so bro the best thing to do is bare with patience, remember imam ahmad ibn hanbal who married at 40 due to looking after his mother . im not saying wait that long :X im just saying i hope for your patience you get the best wife inshaAllah

 

[anonymous]

i think the sahabi that brother ibn abdul-hakim is talking about was Julaybeeb (readiallahu anhu).

and, yeah i also dont feel that connection when im praying. but i think thats due to my wiswaas, which is quite frustrating.

 

[cute123]

For the past year or so ive been really down, every few days i am in tears because i feel so lonely and sad , im 25 and not married , i wish i had some one i could come home to, so i can share things with. I see married people every where and feel a bit of envy , im not attractive and dont think i will ever get a wife,i feel like im a loser. I am practising and do pray but i feel like i havent got the connection with Allah swt when i pray, ever since i started to pray i feel like ive become more depressed instead of feeling the sweetness of imaan, i dont know what to do any more , i wish i could scream out or wish i could tell my mum

Dear brother
dont feel lonely whenever you feel so ; just talk to people in this group ; go across the various threads it has ;believe me it gives immense peace; it diverts your mind. And moreover just try to relax and be calm. nothing is wrong about you. as others have said its shaytaan's whispers.
very good that you have said it aloud. May ALLAH grant you a very pious wife
as brother

 

[*~Sofia~*]

For the past year or so ive been really down, every few days i am in tears because i feel so lonely and sad , im 25 and not married , i wish i had some one i could come home to, so i can share things with. I see married people every where and feel a bit of envy , im not attractive and dont think i will ever get a wife,i feel like im a loser. I am practising and do pray but i feel like i havent got the connection with Allah swt when i pray, ever since i started to pray i feel like ive become more depressed instead of feeling the sweetness of imaan, i dont know what to do any more , i wish i could scream out or wish i could tell my mum

brother

awww.. i feel for u. i pray Allah (swt) makes it easy for u and grants u a pious, intelligent, beautiful wife soon inshallah.
Allah( swt) has created every man in pairs, so there deffinatly is someone out there for u.
and dnt keep thinking that ur a loser, coz ur not.
try talkin to someone about how ur feeling.. a problem shared is a problem halved. and it will make u feel better.

im not very gud at giving advice, but other brothers an sisters have given sum great advice...

all i can say is just keep praying to Allah (swt)..he is always there for you and will never let u dwn..he loves u after all !
make loads of du'a too, have sabr and soon Allah (swt) will bless u with a wife inshallah. :smile:

dnt be imsad be

bro

 

[IceQueen~]

Yes try talking to your mum if you can, she may be able to help you, if nothing else just be there for you

and as bro Abdul Fattah pointed out, the shaytaan is always there to get you when you try to get closer to Allah- refer to this thread inshaAllah

amin to the du'ahs

 

[AnonymousPoster]

For the past year or so ive been really down, every few days i am in tears because i feel so lonely and sad , im 25 and not married , i wish i had some one i could come home to, so i can share things with. I see married people every where and feel a bit of envy , im not attractive and dont think i will ever get a wife,i feel like im a loser. I am practising and do pray but i feel like i havent got the connection with Allah swt when i pray, ever since i started to pray i feel like ive become more depressed instead of feeling the sweetness of imaan, i dont know what to do any more , i wish i could scream out or wish i could tell my mum

Brother, you made me laugh....to be honest, if you are not attractive, so what? there are lots of sisters who are not attractive either, so marry one of them ( forgive me m kidding :hiding

You know, what ........ "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" so don't care about your attraction, BUT about the CHARACTER, InshaAllah

If i were a brother like you, what i would do, would be to improve my qualities by becoming more pious, follow the sunnah of Prophet Muhammad SAW as much as i can, and work hard to live a good life, and then trust ALLAH SWT for what ever would be best for me. ALLAH would provide for me InshaAllah... AND pray after every salat for a wonderful, pious wife ..... that's all......

( it took me more time to get into the brothers' shoes, and think that up..:hiding: )

 

[afriend]

Brother, hmm...I know anybody can walk up and say oh yeah I understand how you feel, but Allah can change your condition in an instant, 4 years ago things were very different for me, and now it's changed completely. Alhamdulillah, my character along with my outward appearance changed!

It's hard to find that person who will love you for what you are, but you will find someone insha'Allah...And when you do, Allah will make it feel multiple folds better because you waited for it for so long, that's the only way you can truly value love, when it doesn't come by very often and then you do find it... chin up bro you'll be just fine one day insha'Allah!



PS. Dear losers, it's not what you think I'm talking about other peoples' experiences, my experiences were just about my character, before you get the wrong idea!

 

[Latifa1985]

For the past year or so ive been really down, every few days i am in tears because i feel so lonely and sad , im 25 and not married , i wish i had some one i could come home to, so i can share things with. I see married people every where and feel a bit of envy , im not attractive and dont think i will ever get a wife,i feel like im a loser. I am practising and do pray but i feel like i havent got the connection with Allah swt when i pray, ever since i started to pray i feel like ive become more depressed instead of feeling the sweetness of imaan, i dont know what to do any more , i wish i could scream out or wish i could tell my mum

Salaam bro,

I just turned to 22.. I am consider myself as a very good-looking person, but people haven't complain about my outlooks.. ;D Well...for me.. I don't care about person's outlooks so much.. It's not so important thing.. There are plenty of ways to wake girl's attention.. I think your behaving is more important, for example. I am sure when you find a right girl, sweet actions (I am NOT talking about physical things!) will come and they will make her to like
you..

Not everyone is blessed by being nice looking.. It's the personality, what speaks own language.. No matter if a guy would be the most handsome in this
planet, if he behave is bad, I would never give him a second look.:uhwhat

Wish you will find your own happiness.. And remember...while being a single.. Singles can be happy too (like I am).. I can discover islam and help people and study knowledge...And of course..there are friends and family.. So you are not alone, right?

Well, take care..:sunny: