I feel intimidated wearing a Hijab

[islamicwoman]

Salam Brothers and sisters;


I am wanting to see advise on my matter;
I live in the UK and as you know Muslims are not the best of faiths accepted by UK citizens. When I wear a a Hijab I feel really isolated
because everyone around me just looks at me ( and at work) because I am wearing a Hijab. I also don't live in the best of towns.

Instead I wanted to ask can I not just wrap a scarf/stole around my body and cover all the front side of my body?
:hmm: It feels really awkward saying this but when I visited Pakistan many girls do not bother wearing a scarf when they go out.

I am planning on moving but I want to know if its permissible.

Jisakllah
:wa:

 

[Hamza Asadullah]

Salam Brothers and sisters;


I am wanting to see advise on my matter;
I live in the UK and as you know Muslims are not the best of faiths accepted by UK citizens. When I wear a a Hijab I feel really isolated
because everyone around me just looks at me ( and at work) because I am wearing a Hijab. I also don't live in the best of towns.

Instead I wanted to ask can I not just wrap a scarf/stole around my body and cover all the front side of my body?
:hmm: It feels really awkward saying this but when I visited Pakistan many girls do not bother wearing a scarf when they go out.

I am planning on moving but I want to know if its permissible.

Jisakllah
:wa:

My sister there is no such dispensation for not wearing hijaab. Also we should not look at other people who are not fulfilling their obligations like you mentioned about certain sisters who do not cover in pakistan. One will always find people who do not fulfill their obligations but they will be accountable for themselves on the day of judgement and we will be accountable for ourselves. It will be every person for themselves on that day so we should be concerned with fulfilling our own obligations and also at the same time have concern in our hearts for those who do not fulfill their obligations and do our best to invite them towards Allah in the best manner possible using wisdom and tact in our approach as it is our duty to enjoin good and forbid evil. We should also want for others what we want for ourselves. But we should not jump off the cliff if others are also jumping off but instead we should realise that what Allah has made obligatory upon us should be our primary and main concern in life with everything else being secondary.

What we must also realise is that most people who may look at you do not necessarily do so out of spite or hatred but merely out of curiosity. Many of them are also intrigued and even find it a good thing. So do not give in to waswas (insinuating whispers of shaythan) and think that they are looking at you out of hatred etc as that is not reality. On top of that it is a wonderful opportunity to give dawah (invite towards Allah). Humans are curious beings and therefore those that do not understand something will want to enquire or at least look out of curiosity. So do not let this put you off. Even if you do get negative responses just ignore it. There are ignorant people everywhere in every town and location even in places dominated by Muslims. So do not let anyone put you off from fulfilling your obligation.

 

[Muslim Woman]

sis , as bro already suggested , don't follow the bad examples of the sisters who don't maintain hijab.

If u wear hijab and people look at u , it's a good chance for u to do a positive publicity of Islam . Many people think Islam orders women to stay at home wearing hijab. Working women with proper hijab can remove the misconception.

If u obey Allah , u will rewarded on the final day . If u disobey , u will be the loser . So , decide , u want to win or lose ?

 

[Scimitar]

Most Muslim women feel liberated from social expectations by wearing the hijaab... and it sends off a different signal to men - basically letting them know that you are not "that" type.

ofcourse, it will take some time before the people you know will get accustomed to it. So you gotta be a little patient until those peeps get used to it.

As for those who don't know you? Well I live in London, and plenty of Muslimahs wear hijaab. happily I might add... can't be that bad for you, surely?

Scimi

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

it will get easier, dont give up

 

[marwen]

`Ai shah (May ALLAH be pleased with her) narrated that ALLAH's Messenger (May the peace and blessing of ALLAH be upon him) said:

"Whoever seeks ALLAH's pleasure at the cost of men's displeasure, will win the pleasure of ALLAH and ALLAH will cause men to be pleased with him. Whoever seeks to please men at the cost of ALLAH's displeasure, will win the displeasure of ALLAH, and ALLAH will cause men to be displeased with Him."
[Reported by Ibn Hibban in his Sahih].

40 Hadith..

 

[Muhaba]

i don't understand why non-muslim women don't feel that way in a muslim country even where most ppl ar fully covered? why are they not self-conscious or feel out of place when they wear revealing clothes? why don't they worry what others will think of them? I think it maybe the trick of shaytan that to them it tells that "you are liberated and all the hijabi muslim women are oppressed" which makes them wear more and more revealing clothes proudly. while to the muslim woman it might say "you seem out of place. what will all these ppl think, etc." to keep muslim women from wearing hijab.

I am unsure if all ppl get such thoughts and some listen to them and change while others have more eman and are more sure of themselves so don't listen to such thoughts.

what you should do is get lectures about hijab and islam which will make you more knowledgeable and increase your faith, because one reason why shaytan becomes successful in attacting ppl is because of their lack of knowledge. knowledge is a fort against shaytan. when you know the benefits and necessity of hijab, you'll be stronger. convert muslim women wear the hijab and many say how good they feel with hijab and how vulnerable they feel without it. also get in contact with other hijabi muslims so tht you get stronger and don't feel alone.

not wearing abaya (burka)/ hijab is a sin and women who wear revealing clothes (too tight or too thin) will not even get the scent of jannah!

 

[islamicwoman]

i don't understand why non-muslim women don't feel that way in a muslim country even where most ppl ar fully covered? why are they not self-conscious or feel out of place when they wear revealing clothes? why don't they worry what others will think of them? I think it maybe the trick of shaytan that to them it tells that "you are liberated and all the hijabi muslim women are oppressed" which makes them wear more and more revealing clothes proudly. while to the muslim woman it might say "you seem out of place. what will all these ppl think, etc." to keep muslim women from wearing hijab.

I am unsure if all ppl get such thoughts and some listen to them and change while others have more eman and are more sure of themselves so don't listen to such thoughts.

what you should do is get lectures about hijab and islam which will make you more knowledgeable and increase your faith, because one reason why shaytan becomes successful in attacting ppl is because of their lack of knowledge. knowledge is a fort against shaytan. when you know the benefits and necessity of hijab, you'll be stronger. convert muslim women wear the hijab and many say how good they feel with hijab and how vulnerable they feel without it. also get in contact with other hijabi muslims so tht you get stronger and don't feel alone.

not wearing abaya (burka)/ hijab is a sin and women who wear revealing clothes (too tight or too thin) will not even get the scent of jannah!

Salam
Thanks for this message. I don't actually wear the abuya but instead wear normal clothes with a long jacket, is this okay?

 

[islamicwoman]

Most Muslim women feel liberated from social expectations by wearing the hijaab... and it sends off a different signal to men - basically letting them know that you are not "that" type.

ofcourse, it will take some time before the people you know will get accustomed to it. So you gotta be a little patient until those peeps get used to it.

As for those who don't know you? Well I live in London, and plenty of Muslimahs wear hijaab. happily I might add... can't be that bad for you, surely?

Scimi

yes, you do have a point

 

[islamicwoman]

My sister there is no such dispensation for not wearing hijaab. Also we should not look at other people who are not fulfilling their obligations like you mentioned about certain sisters who do not cover in pakistan. One will always find people who do not fulfill their obligations but they will be accountable for themselves on the day of judgement and we will be accountable for ourselves. It will be every person for themselves on that day so we should be concerned with fulfilling our own obligations and also at the same time have concern in our hearts for those who do not fulfill their obligations and do our best to invite them towards Allah in the best manner possible using wisdom and tact in our approach as it is our duty to enjoin good and forbid evil. We should also want for others what we want for ourselves. But we should not jump off the cliff if others are also jumping off but instead we should realise that what Allah has made obligatory upon us should be our primary and main concern in life with everything else being secondary.

What we must also realise is that most people who may look at you do not necessarily do so out of spite or hatred but merely out of curiosity. Many of them are also intrigued and even find it a good thing. So do not give in to waswas (insinuating whispers of shaythan) and think that they are looking at you out of hatred etc as that is not reality. On top of that it is a wonderful opportunity to give dawah (invite towards Allah). Humans are curious beings and therefore those that do not understand something will want to enquire or at least look out of curiosity. So do not let this put you off. Even if you do get negative responses just ignore it. There are ignorant people everywhere in every town and location even in places dominated by Muslims. So do not let anyone put you off from fulfilling your obligation.

Salam
Thanks for the detail message. I know you have all the right points and I think I was going into the wrong direction.

 

[islamicwoman]

Salam, (thread owner)
I have read all the posts. I think I was going the wrong direction and by thinking of even not wearing the Hijab was wrong.
I am saving up the money to buy a house far from the town I live in. Inshallah I will live somewhere where there is a huge Muslim community -
and a good respect for Islam. I would like to thank all brothers/sisters on this thread that have moved me to the right direction. May Allah bless you and grant you entry to the highest heaven possible. I have decided that I WILL wear a Hijab - no matter what people think or ssay. I agree with all the points made.
Ji'sakalahh

 

[TrueStranger]

Salam, (thread owner)
I have read all the posts. I think I was going the wrong direction and by thinking of even not wearing the Hijab was wrong.
I am saving up the money to buy a house far from the town I live in. Inshallah I will live somewhere where there is a huge Muslim community -
and a good respect for Islam. I would like to thank all brothers/sisters on this thread that have moved me to the right direction. May Allah bless you and grant you entry to the highest heaven possible. I have decided that I WILL wear a Hijab - no matter what people think or ssay. I agree with all the points made.
Ji'sakalahh

Keep the hijab on my Muslim sister. I also live in a place with few Muslims and go to a school where I'm the only minority in 99.9% of my classes. I know that being a minority that is marginalized is difficult, but whatever you do for the sake of Allah, Allah will reward you for it. Bear patient. I think moving to a place that has a higher Muslim population is a good idea. Sometimes, the mere fact of being in the company of Muslims makes me happy. There is power in numbers. May Allah help us be with and live among the Muslims.

I need to move to a Muslim country ASAP!:exhausted

 

[islamicwoman]

Keep the hijab on my Muslim sister. I also live in a place with few Muslims and go to a school where I'm the only minority in 99.9% of my classes. I know that being a minority that is marginalized is difficult, but whatever you do for the sake of Allah, Allah will reward you for it. Bear patient. I think moving to a place that has a higher Muslim population is a good idea. Sometimes, the mere fact of being in the company of Muslims makes me happy. There is power in numbers. May Allah help us be with and live among the Muslims.

I need to move to a Muslim country ASAP!:exhausted

Hi,
Yes I do agree, I think most of the time its the factor of where I live that affects me.
I live in the UK and I'm thinking of moving to maybe stockport in manchester
or even Dubai < and Dubai would not be a problem there

 

[Sawdah]

Salam, (thread owner)
I have read all the posts. I think I was going the wrong direction and by thinking of even not wearing the Hijab was wrong.
I am saving up the money to buy a house far from the town I live in. Inshallah I will live somewhere where there is a huge Muslim community -
and a good respect for Islam. I would like to thank all brothers/sisters on this thread that have moved me to the right direction. May Allah bless you and grant you entry to the highest heaven possible. I have decided that I WILL wear a Hijab - no matter what people think or ssay. I agree with all the points made.
Ji'sakalahh

Wa 'alaykumu salaam ukhti,

Alhamdulillah! I'm happy that you decided to keep wearing the hijaab, sis. I hope you do end up living in a Muslim community. Do you have a masjid in your town? Try visiting it from time to time. You'll sure to find many sisters wearing hijaab there inshaaAllah and maybe that will help forget/take off the pressure you feel at your workplace.

May Allah subhanahu wa ta 'ala keep you and all of us steadfast on the deen, ameen.

 

[Life_Is_Short]

They're all whispers of shaitan. I was thinking a lot like that lately because there are very few girls in my university that actually do wear the hijab. What stopped me? The very reason why I choose to wear it in the first place.

 

[Hulk]

Don't let the ignorance of others affect your knowledge of what is right. People will respect you more if you stand firm your ground

 

[Scimitar]

Hi,
Yes I do agree, I think most of the time its the factor of where I live that affects me.
I live in the UK and I'm thinking of moving to maybe stockport in manchester
or even Dubai < and Dubai would not be a problem there

Don't move to Dubai... the only thing Islamic about it is - you can hear adhaan...

The rest? Well, it's worse than London, New York, and Las Vegas rolled into one.

Please reconsider.

Also, the definition of hijaab in modern day has been compromised. Take my neighbours opposite side of the street. Muslim family. 5 daughters. All of them wear hijaab, head (scarf) and then... (facepalm moment)... you look down and you can see leggings, skin tight. What's the point?

One day I approached on of the sisters and told her that she is not adhering to the principle of hijaab, and man - she started waxing off lyrical in pseudo patwa style. All that was missing was the reggae beat. I felt so embarrassed for her. and ashamed for her too. She said things like "what do you know? you aint no aalim, you're more like staalin, so stop stalling, you know ya waanting"... I mean, really? Compromised Muslims... that's what I see a lot of nowadays and it makes me sad.

Scimi

 

[Hulk]

One time I was walking by a clothing shop and one of the mannequins was dressed in a hijab and a tube top.

Thank goodness I've never actually seen anyone adopt that style.

 

[Muhaba]

Salam
Thanks for this message. I don't actually wear the abuya but instead wear normal clothes with a long jacket, is this okay?

It doesn't matter if you wear an abaya or coat, as long as it's long and loose and not in attractive or bright colors that attract attention.

 

[islamicwoman]

Wa 'alaykumu salaam ukhti,

Alhamdulillah! I'm happy that you decided to keep wearing the hijaab, sis. I hope you do end up living in a Muslim community. Do you have a masjid in your town? Try visiting it from time to time. You'll sure to find many sisters wearing hijaab there inshaaAllah and maybe that will help forget/take off the pressure you feel at your workplace.

May Allah subhanahu wa ta 'ala keep you and all of us steadfast on the deen, ameen.

Salaam, yes there is a Masjid in my town - mainly for men. Yes inshallah I will live in the future in a Muslim country/town.
The problem with the Masjid is that whenever there is a ladies gathering, I feel that the ladies there are on a status rating.
If you are the higher status you move right to the front. If no-one cares about you you just stay where you are.
I shouldn't say this but I don't love it. No-one even talks to me.